
Build-a-Bear Workshops have been delivering smiles for over 20 years in the form of customizable teddy bears. Each one can be a wonderful expression of love, or a memory for someone to hold onto for forever. With an array of customization you would never expect customers to take advantage and bring in weird and creepy items to stuff their bear with...
...or that's exactly what people do.
Reddit user mttp1990 wanted to know:
Employees of Build-A-Bear. What is the weirdest thing a customer has requested?
Sing Out.
"I was not an employee but I interviewed. It was a group interview and they asked us all questions. Toward the end they asked us individually if we wanted to sing a song but stressed we didn't have to."
"Only employees who sang moved on in the interview process." 099uyx
The Monkey.
"Not an employee but at the one in the mall near me the employees told me that a lady would come in with her pet monkey that she treated as her child. She used it as a clothing story for the monkey. She also tried to sue the local school district into letting the monkey attend but was unsuccessful." GMHGeorge
"Stop telling me to make a wish."
"My mom and I are both adults and we both like stuffed animals. My mom wanted a lion from Build-a-bear a long time ago and the employee wouldn't let her finish making her look until she made a wish on the heart. The strangest request she probably ever got was, "Stop telling me to make a wish."
""EDIT: For those who are wondering, the woman would not let her continue without doing the Heart Ceremony and my mother told her she 'reserved the right to make a wish later' so we were no longer being held captive by a woman with an unsewn lion. Frankly if it were me I would have complained to corporate that being condescending to adults lost them future business."
It's a shame because they do many animals where part of the proceeds go to the WWF, including my mom's lion and a wolf I got later from the person I was dating at the time. Sometimes you just wanna get a stuffed animal and support the wild, you know? " Ivytongue
1 to 5.
"I interviewed for them last year - My hair was a very light blonde but I had dark roots so it was easy to tell it wasn't my natural color - Although it was a very natural color, my interviewer asked me if I could dye it black because it was unnatural and "parents would throw a fit." I told it wouldn't be possible because it took me months to get that blonde."
"She then proceeded to write the number one on a piece of paper. "This is what I have graded your interview on a scale of one to five." I didn't say anything and just walked out..."
"All because I didn't want to dye my hair black - oh and the hours? 10 hours a week while I went to school." lulalethal
PUMBA!!!
"My girlfriend and I were probably the weirdest group of the day at our local Build A Bear."
"We went to Build a bear for her birthday and the promotional live action lion king bears were on sale, so we decided to get the ugly live action Pumba bear. For those who have not seen him before, he is an absolute unit with lazy eyes and an evil smile. He knows the sins he's committed and he is not remorseful."
"Anyways we dressed him in nothing but a cowboy hat and marvel boxers, then named him Charles Entertainment Cheese. Oh and his voice box is also the Super Mario theme."
"I like to imagine that when I die, the only thing that will be there is just his face in an endless void while the Super Mario theme plays ominously in the background for eternity."
"The employees were super helpful but were obviously a little uncomfortable at how hard we were laughing at the creation of our stupid son." SuperOwnah
Since Maxine retired....
"I worked at BABW for 7 years and I don't know that any requests were super weird. We put recordings of deceased relatives, recordings of fetal heartbeats, pacifiers, and squeakers from dog toys in animals - okay, that one might be a bit strange - but the rest were usually very sweet, and touching moments, and sometimes exciting for the kiddo who was "graduating" from their pacifier."
"I did get called a lot of names when the holidays rolled around and we were out of the holiday animals (no longer an issue since Maxine retired and EVERYTHING was produced in ridiculous quantities, instead of limited ones). I was often asked to produce products we didn't have in stock, but that's retail."
"I think the weirdest experiences were helping kids dress their animals - some folks have interesting choices in outfits. I remember one little bear left our store in a tank top, undies, and heels (with bows on the ears, of course) - the owner of said bear was a 6 year old girl, but she stayed within her budget!"
"I actually loved irking (and working) there and if I had any free time or ever needed extra money, I'd probably go back." JDPip
The Pacifiers....
"Back when I worked a few years ago, I had a customer come in holding a bag of what looked like at least 10 pacifiers. She spread the pacifiers throughout the inside of the bear, and told her son that they were a big boy now and didn't need the pacifiers anymore, but he'll always be close to them as they are in the bear now. So I guess it wasn't so weird as it was sweet." chinchingering
Sam.
"Not an employee, but a read a story about someone coming with one of their young relatives while they were doing the eevee thing, and when the relative asked OP what to name the eevee, he responded with "Sam", which got some looks from the employee handling the eevee. afterwords, the employee said to them "i know what you did."
"Sam is the name of the main protagonist in a pornographic comic. Sam is also an eevee. in that comic." orifan1
Grandma ain't having it....
"Customer, not employee...Years ago I made a monkey one for my cousin that I put a noise maker in the crotch that would laugh when you squeezed it. Got some really awkward looks from the employee helping me put it together. My grandma was definitely not amused when my cousin opened it in front of the whole family." KCtraveler25
Honeypunch....
"I have been censored in my bears name twice at a build a bear. One happened when I was five, one when I was six. When I was five I got a bear who I wanted to name Honeypunch (shut up I was five). The attendant told me no punch is a bad word so she forced me to change it to bunch. The same thing happened with the second best next year, albeit different first half of the name."
Bronies Ruin Everything
"I worked there in high school about 10 years ago now. I guess the weirdest thing (but was very common) was putting dead relatives' recorded voices into stuffed animals. One was for a little girl whose father had died in Iraq. I was definitely crying while I sewed that bear up..."
"Other than that there were a few bronies that came in for Rainbow Dash. They were always very awkward but nice."
Showing Love The Only Way You Know How?
"Watching a teenage girl make a bear dressed like her boyfriend, for her boyfriend, while he was there. I have never seen someone try so hard to look interested, but failing. Teenage love I guess."
"The weirdest thing is all the middle aged women who come in Everytime somehow new is released. They collect them, but are always super weird people."
Speaking Honest Truth
"My girlfriend and her grad school friends made a bear called Catastrophe Bear and he said "everything is awful"
Which is Worse: The Tooth Or The Man?
"A Native family wanted to put a real bear tooth inside the bear (it was for a newborn). I made sure to check the sharpness of the tooth so it wouldn't puncture the fabric. Nothing weird with that job though."
"Although, there was a time when this old, drunk guy walked by the store and tried to grab a little girl near the entrance. A father intervened and got her back, but people were more bewildered by this guy doing it so obviously rather than get upset."
"I hated the store's music though (kids singing hit songs), i hated the chipper face/voice we had to put on, and I haaaated handling the fluff when refilling it."
SPOILER: Kids Are Gross
"I worked at Build A Bear for 8 years. It honestly was a pretty great job. They weirdest request I ever had was a woman brought in a moose (not our brand). It was a gift from her boyfriend and her children had ripped the head clean off. She wanted to know if we could fix it."
"I was one of the better ones at the sewing so the manager brought it to me. I told the woman I would do my best. I was able to get the head back on. Returned it to the woman and she said it looked as good as new."
"One day we had a kindergarten teacher drag in this huge Eeyore stuffed animal that the kids love. It had gone flat over the years and smelled and looked just gross. We actually opened it up and refilled it. The smell as the air and stuffing went into it was awful. Sewed it back up and sent her on her way."
"We had multiple people come in to put pacifiers in the bear to break there little one of the habit. One particular mom did that. Then came back 3 days later and had us open it up and remove it. The saddest was the woman who put a mini urn of her parents ashes inside."
"Anyway those are the ones that stick out to me."
It's Not What They Put In, It's What They Refuse To.
"I worked at build a bear for about 2ish years. I just recently quit this past April. My does time f-cking fly."
"People put a lot of things in their stuffed animals, voices of deceased relatives was a popular one. I don't think that's weird though, we all grieve in our own ways and hey if a bear with Uncle Ted's voice in it comforts you whatever. The people who REALLY weirded me out were the people who didn't want ANYTHING. Not just no sounds or smells or whatever, I get it that sh-ts expensive and adds up quickly. I worked there and I couldn't afford a decked out teddy bear. I mean no fabric heart for the heart ceremony, no birth certificate, no box, nothing. ALL OF WHICH ARE FREE AND ENCOURAGED!!"
"I want you to remember something, this is build a bear. You are buying a $30 teddy bear for your kid. You can go literally anywhere else for a stuffed animal for half the price. Build a bear is about the experience of making the bear, customizing it, and taking it home for your kid to have it's own custom and personal furry friend (yes that is what we have to call them). Why the f-ck are you paying $30 for a random stuffed animal? Why are you doing this? What the f-ck is wrong with you at least put a fabric heart in dude! It's free! It's literally free to put in a cute little heart with a wish for your child!
"It makes no sense and to this day frustrates me because to me there's no better way to say "I don't give a sh-t about what I'm getting my child for Christmas." Than that.""
"Also as a bonus people who were super weird with gendering their kids stuffed animal weirded me the f-ck out. It's a teddy bear Kyle your daughter can give it a tiara and name it Michael Jackson if she wants."
Been Around The Block A Few Times
"I've worked for the company for almost 4 years. Overall the days follow the same routine of families come in with a budget and kids have fits when they want something outside of that budget. But I have certainly encountered some weirdos and just weird situations."
"Weirdest: mom wanted me to put a sack of her late daughters baby teeth inside the bear with a recording of her voice. I feel like there's a lot of other sentimental items that could be kept with the bear other than teeth, but I guess everyone grieves in different ways."
"Crappy: parents will actually stuff things like the sounds in the bear before bringing them to the machine in hopes of pulling one over on you, like I'm not going to notice the hard plastic sound in your otherwise empty bear eyeroll"
"Heartbreaking (at first, but it gets better): parent booked a birthday party and requested me as the leader (pretty typical, I have usual costumers that come in and we have a bond at this point). I knew the costumer and I was excited because I knew they've been going through the ringer with their middle kid in and out of the hospital, so I was really happy that I'd be able to be part of a happy celebration with them. Well mom came in to talk to me early and it turns out middle kids has cancer and prognosis is not great, so the party is so her siblinggs and cousins can all come and each make her a bear to have in the hospital with her (begin the water works here). So of course I made the party as special as I could and during the wish ceremony some of the kids said their wishes out loud and it was all wishes for the kid to get better. I was in tears by the end of the party and had to leave as soon as it was over because I was a mess. (Last update I got from the family though she's doing better and in remission!!!!!)"
"One I had to encourage against: man came in wanting a bear for his girlfriend for this last Valentine's Day. He wanted to put an engagement ring INSIDE of the bear and give it to her and then after a few months rip it open in front of her to propose. Ultimately he agreed it was not a great idea and he'd just stick with a cute bear and find a different way to propose. They came in last month making a flower girl bear for their flower girl to be!"
"It's an interesting job and totally not for everyone, but I honestly love it. Not my forever job, but it's been great while going to undergrad and grad school! Some days I leave full of bubbly laughter and over days I leave in tears, keeps things interesting!"
Well, At Least His Spirit Has A Forever Place
"Back in the earlier build a bear days, I was asked to put an urn that contained the ashes of their father who had recently passed from cancer into the bear. I didn't know what to say and my manager was on break. They were really sweet and I completed the task for them (reed teddy, if I recall correctly). They also had previously recorded his voice so that also went into the teddy."
"20 minutes later when my manager returned, I informed her of what happened and how I handled it and within the next few months we had a store policy of "no deceased remains".
"Looking back on it, I'm happy I could do that for them. They even dressed it like him, and had planned to have it on the mantle for the family and grandchildren to press the hand and hear him."
Again With The Remains?
"Not weird, but heartbreaking:"
"Had an older woman come in and request 5 bears, each with aa personalized voice box. She was in late stages of cancer and was getting a bear for each of her grandkids, with a different message to each one to remember her by."
"Potentially heartbreaking, ultimately awkward, and traumatising for those involved :"
"A coworker used to work in a different store, and one day a person came in, picked a bear, and sort of faffed about a while before taking it to be stuffed. Coworker puts bear on the machine, hits the pedal, and is covered in a cloud of "dust", along with the guest, and the store. Turns out the person had poured their late partners cremains inside the bear and not said anything. Tip: if you want to put ashes in a build-a-bear, get a little urn and put some ashes into that, and put that in the bear. Loose ash = bad."
Annnnnnnnnnd Gross...
"I worked there for almost 5 years back in the early 2000s. Once there was a woman who came in with her son's monkey and asked for a hole to be stitched up. This was common and we all knew how to do a basic ladder stitch so my manager agreed to do it. When she took it in the back, she noticed that there were holes only in the crotch of the monkey and that the fur was matted. That's when she realized that this woman's son was (probably) doing the deed into the doll. I don't remember if my manager put on gloves and stitched it or offered the woman a new doll, but that was by far the craziest request."
"I also once had to get into that bear costume after someone wore it for 2+ hours because a woman complained that her son wanted to meet the bear and we had packed up 10 minutes early. That sucked really bad."
Who knew so much went down in these little bear shops. Do you have a similar retail story to share? Let us know below?
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- Make-A-Wish Employees Share The Strangest Requests That Were Actually Granted - George Takei ›
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
Reddit user, woodside37, wanted to know what we should never have to pay for again when they asked:
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
rickmitchel
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
CrispyCrunchyPoptart
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
AuntyMarcy
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
JonesNewport83
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
callmeventibcimavent
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
Kydra96
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
waqasnaseem07
"I. Exist."
"Birth certificates"
alexchico3
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
Spaghetti-Evan1991
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
Amelsander
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
pennylayne77
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Water"
selfishnerd77
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
I_Am_Become_Dream
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
Astronimus123
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
AlexReynard
"Giving birth (In the us)"
z0k0n
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Main-Yogurtcloset-82
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is Hardio
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
- [Reddit]
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
- notanotherbreach
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
- k_g94
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
-[Reddit]
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
- PoiLethe
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
- J09Lynn
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
- wheredMyArmourGo
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
- Pauliester
Growing Pains
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
- Individual_Ad_7523
Two Volcanos
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
- Queen-of-meme
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
- Local_Masterpiece_
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
- PleasuredMeatStick
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
- LuckyBugHarley
Technological Advancements
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
- IAmNotLookingatYou
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
- Object_Prize
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
- AbbyNormalKnits
Double Trouble
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
- BigBunsLittleBunbun
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
- cryptic-coyote
"Exactly!"
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
- APD2269
Expensive
"They're expensive."
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
- SailorSpoon11
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
- insertcaffeine
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
- kaytay3000
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
- letsjumpintheocean
Getting Comfortable
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
- ChadweenaThundervag
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
- Skkaj225
"Am guy."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
- DeluxeWafer
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
- Miikami
Either Or
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
- batchofbetterbutter
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
- octokisu
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
- didithedragon
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
- Peter_the_pear
Attempted Murder
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
- Outrageous-Proof4630
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
- lil_ho_on_da_prairie
It's Constant
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
- Plus_Bison_7091
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
- zapsquad
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
- gentlybeepingheart
Destroyed
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
- Originalluff
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
- I_love_pillows
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
- Rozeline
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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There are humane ways to tell someone to go home after a... liaison.
How can one be so rude after being so intimate?
I'm not saying you have to snuggle and profess love, but damn, a quick... "thanks, I hope life is kind to you" goes a long way.
Redditor sumyungdood wanted to hear the tea about the times they had to tell a lover to take a hike. They asked:
"What is the worst way someones asked you to leave after sex?"
Tell me your worst. Mine our stories where I had find my clothes in the dark and sneak out naked.
Don't ask...
A Late Run
"Asked if he could drive my car to the gas station to buy cigarettes and when he came back he told me he left my keys in the car and it was running."
TopOcelot13
Beefed
"An old friend invited me over for her famous beef stew. I got there, we fool around, had sex, then right after she handed me a tupperware of the stew and said 'you got sex and stew, now please leave.' Still not sure if that's the worst way I was kicked out or the best."
TheRockMan31
"Most of the people here didn’t get stew. You did okay!"
livesarah
'is it that obvious'
"Went home with a girl from the bar. After we had sex, she said something like 'soooo... think you can get an Uber now? If not, I GUESS you can sleep on the couch for a few hours.' Here I was, sitting on some random girl's couch trying to find an Uber at 4 AM. Mercifully I did find one and when the guy picked me up he said 'so, your hookup kick you out?' I said 'is it that obvious' and he replied 'you weren't the first one I drove back to their car tonight and you probably won't be the last.'"
apocalypticradish
Yummy
"Go grab some Taco Bell. You can eat it on your way home. Honestly it was better than the sex. And I don't even like Taco Bell that much."
Nobody_Wins_13
I hate Taco Bell. And since reading this... I hate people.
Mrs. Robinson?
"She lit a cigarette, then looked at me for like 20 seconds, and said 'Well, bye.' I just got dressed and left. Never saw her again."
Rhalellan
And you are?
"While dozing off, he gently tapped my shoulder, and said: 'Maribel, you can’t stay here.'"
"My name is not Maribel."
tikkichik21
"See this is what happens when you don’t let people talk about Bruno."
Brendanlendan
Go
"He got off me and started looking at pictures of other women on Instagram, and commenting on how much more attractive they were than me and told me 'oh yeah you can go now.' We were best friends for like two years up until that moment."
Caramel_Cappucino
"I’m open minded but this is exactly why I often don’t trust male friendships. You could even be a lesbian and one moment of vulnerability they may take advantage of that. I know it’s unrelated but your experience made me upset and I’m sorry you had to go through that."
L8NiGHTFLiGHT
second time...
"He rolled over, grabbed his phone, and without even looking at me said 'find your clothes, you know where the door is' and just laid there on his phone ignoring me while I gathered my clothes and left. He tried texting me a few days later because he was drunk and horny so I told him 'you know where your hand is' and blocked him."
olivinemultichrome
Gross
"We were good friends for a few years before hooking up after a night of drinking."
"Halfway through sex he told me he can't actually do this because he wanted to get back with his ex and can't mess it up because she's the hottest girl he'll ever be with. He lived in the middle of nowhere and I couldn't leave until the morning so he made me sleep on the couch."
barontayto
Wow. Some people are truly disgusting. How do you treat other humans this way?
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Most couples are inseparable and enjoy doing everything together, thanks in part to shared mutual interests.
But on occasion, some people in relationships go off in pursuit of one-sided pleasures in secret for various reasons.
These can range from going out to a vegan restaurant when the other person is a carnivore to seeing a Netflix show that is too violent for a squeamish significant other.
Because not every significant other may not share the same passion, Redditors TheTinRam asked:
"What’s a guilty pleasure you hide from your significant other?"

These Redditors needed some "me time."
Dad Time
"Everytime I go on a late night grocery run (once or twice a month) because I work nights, and my wife forgot to grab whatever, I add a $0.70 Mexican soda to the cart. It is just for me. It is something my dad used to get me on especially long days when I was a kid 'helping' him on jobsites. It is my tiny reminder of him."
– thecountnotthesaint
Story For No One
"I write stories for years now, some of the times she thinks I'm working on the computer but I'm actually writing a story. There is nothing to hide but I just keep it to myself, none of my family members know I write stories. Till today I have written 56 stories (most of them are short)."
– SuvenPan
In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning
"Staying up late for peace and quiet."
– Blue_OG_46
Chatting For One
"I talk to myself all the time, I was actually wondering last night if it was a really weird thing to do lol"
– hottytoddy_sko
Naked And Sacred
"I will cruise the house butt naked and just do whatever the hell I want. About once a month. I won’t be able to this summer because the kids will be back in school, but come August, I’ll be naked and free again!"
– batchofbetterbutter
Some people need to get out of the house.
Self Therapy
"Sometimes I take the long way home and talk to myself in the car about my 'problems' - like Self Therapy. I put one earbud in so ppl think I could be on the phone."
"I get quite animated. It helps to get a stressful day out of my system before I get home and switch gears."
– Humble-Plankton2217
Solo Slice
"My husband has gluten sensitivity. If he eats regular pizza, his stomach hurts for a couple of days after."
"Well, I don't, so sometimes I say I'm going for a run, and I do run.... to the pizza store, eat a slice, and run back."
– sohumsahm
Catching Up With The Boys
"Covid has messed it up for a bit now. But every 3 or so months the boys and I all get up like we are going to work at our respective jobs but instead all call in sick and meet for breakfast, then go back to our one buddies place for the day to hangout. Around 4 or 5 one by one we all head home for our normal arrival time."
"It's literally the only way for us all to get together reliably. Most of us have known each other for the better part of 30 years now, going way back to junior kindergarten for some."
"Twice I have let her know my plan for the day and twice I have gotten phone calls to come home early for what ever not some emergency. So now we do it secretly."
– foh242
Some of the things people do behind their SO's backs is for endearing reasons.
Smooch Ploy
"I don’t know if this is a guilty pleasure necessarily but I pretend to be asleep when he comes home from work because he always kisses me on the forehead."
– str8outofabook
Catching Zzzs
"I love when she snores."
"She complains (only lightly) about my snoring all the time, and I always feel awful that I make it tricky for her to get a good night's sleep. When she's snoring, I know she's actually going to rest well, and it makes me happy."
– ricdesi
Scent Of A Man
"Smelling his clothes. Not creepily, like his boxers. But when he lets me borrow a shirt or a sweater I’ll put it on and just revel in the smell of him on his clothes. If I recall correctly, it definitely wasn’t like this when we first started dating. It’s been over two years now and I only remember doing this around the 7 month mark. He smells really, really good."
– he-whoeatsbugs
The Forever Admirer
"I have a whole album of 'unflattering' pictures of her. Not really something I hide, but they make me happy. She’s so silly yet so beautiful."
– Dewahll
They say that a couple that plays together, stays together.
That's all well and good. However, a significant other having some alone time should never be stigmatized.
My husband and I usually watch every TV show together, but I watch Netflix's Ozark by myself because I enjoy intense dramas, immensely.
It's not a secret. And he's glad I watch the shows that I want to watch on my own time–just like I encourage him to watch all those UFO documentaries that he's obsessed with, by himself.
No really, watch them without me.
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