Weddings, and the festivities leading up to them, are a major milestone in many people's lives. The sheer stress and effort that go into planning a wedding are usually enough to make people realize they should try hard not to screw things up.
Sometimes that isn't the case though, and when things go wrong they often go very, very wrong.
Reddit user u/MediocrePNumber6 asked:
"What's the biggest bachelor/bachelorette party or wedding night f**k up you have seen?"
20.
Myself and some mates went paintballing a few years ago and the other team was the groomsmen from a wedding happening the next day, all went well but at the end of the game the paintball host said "showdown between groom and best man" so they go back to back and walk 5 paces and shoot eachother but the best man shot him on the neck and it looked like the biggest hickey ever so id say it was fun to try explain that!
19.
I was at my uncles fiancés bachelorette party. The next morning we wake up and her engagement ring is missing. Her drunk brain reasoned it was safer to take her ring off to wash her hands in the club but she never put it back on after. We tried calling the place but they never found it. Probably made worse by the fact the ring was the grooms mothers engagement ring and she had picked him out of her 7 sons to take the ring for his fiancé. The groom was very cool about it and she felt really bad but they ended up having to get a lookalike for the wedding a few weeks later.
They're still married years later with kids so it's a happy ending.
18.
My buddy's bucks weekend was after the wedding. We partied in a hotel room for the night then met the bride and her party the next day to stay and party at a house for a few nights.. first night we got super hammered at the hotel, place got totally destroyed, tried to order a stripper to the room, instead a hooker showed up, no one wanted to have sex with her and she didn't speak much English so we had to pay her $400 to leave. Groom fell over on the hotel room floor that was covered in broken glass.. in the morning the groom disappears to a brothel..at the house all the strip joints that we called (it was a lot) to try and get a stripper we're calling back, new wife finds out, takes off the ring and gives it back to the groom.. very awkward. They are still married with two kids.
17.
My best man fell down some steps at a strip club. Another dude picked him up, but his foot must have been wedged under the stair. One almighty crunch later he was back on his drunken feet, only to wake up to this the next day.
16.
We had a big going away party for one of my buddies, as with all groups of soldiers - the night ended at the strip club (yeah I know). Anyways, one of the guys just happened to have gotten married earlier that day. He decided that rather than going home with his lovely bride on their wedding night, he would rather come with us while she went home.
They just announced they're getting divorced, it's been 2 months.
15.
Giphy
We are Greek-Americans. And not many Greeks actually break plates at weddings. But this bride insisted on breaking plates. So people are dancing and others are breaking plates by their feet. The bride (and others) are kneeling in a circle clapping around the people dancing.. and all the plates being thrown.
And as you could guess, a piece hit the bride in the face right under her eye and she started gushing blood all over. Her dress looks like it's out of a horror film. It took a while for the tiny nick to stop bleeding. But it was scary seeing her just start bleeding like that.
14.
Was at a bachelor party years ago, early 20s, for a friend and he got a private room with a stripper and had sex with her. Don't talk to him anymore for other reasons such as him being dead but the marriage fell apart pretty quick
13.
My BIL went go karting for his bachelor's. Came off, face planted, gravel rash all down the side of his face right before the wedding.
He went to hospital and got it bandaged. The dressings didn't come off until the morning of. 100% healed. Doctor was impressed and he lived to the honeymoon.
12.
A friend of mine worked as a bartender and told me that this 26 y/o girl was celebrating her bachelorette party when she saw a video of her fiancé having sex with another woman at his bachelor party. For almost an hour he had to act as this girl's therapist until she stumbled off into the night still depressed at the way things turned out.
11.
Wedding videographer here. I have full on seen people get married, sign the paperwork, and the dude goes off to gave sex with a bridesmaid the wedding night. It's honestly impressive how little time it takes to end that marriage.
10.
My old boss cheated on his bachelor party night, swore all his friends to secrecy, went through with the wedding then told her on the first night of their honeymoon out of guilt. Married and split up within 1 week!
9.
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Buddy smashed his face on the first night. He passed out in the hotel wearing socks. Got up to go to the bathroom and slipped on the marble floor. His teeth went through his mouth. Blood everywhere. We called hotel staff to help. EMTs came, and two of us took him to an emergency dentist. He ended up leaving the next day. Worst parts: $8k in dental work, had to have his jaw wired shut, and was scheduled for his first day at a new job three days after the accident.
8.
I used to strip at bachelorette parties. Some brides to be were way too physical in ways I sometimes wondered if marriage at that point was a good idea for them.
7.
My gf went on one where they got a party bus. Everyone was drunk before getting on. They just drove around the town we live in after picking up all the guests (about a 20min drive gets you from one side to the other on a slow day). The toilet on the bus broke early on then started overflowing as people kept using it even after being told not to. 2 people had asthma attacks as they were allowed smoke on the bus but windows didnt open enough to ventilate for 15+ people smoking like trains. 1 person passed out and woke up only to projectile vomit all over the place.
Fights broke out after onboard alcohol supply ran out gf demanded to be dropped home as due to all the smoke her chest became heavily irritated and she couldnt ignore the smell of the busted toilet any longer. She got dropped off and then 2 people off the bus came to our door with her demanding I give them extra alcohol then trying to guilt me by saying its a gift for the happy couple (I planned their entire wedding for free and paid for the dj as a gift) so I just laughed and said no.
A month later they got married (the couple got alot of praise for having such a wonderful wedding on such a budget). 4 months later filed for divorce after one's drug habit came to light along with both realising they were cheating rings around each other.
6.
While smoking outside groom (brother of my fiancé at the time) started hitting on me and wanted to get a blow job off me - literally took his junk out etc. Apologised promptly and put it back after seeing my reaction, saying he's too drunk and excited. But then again, he has been cheating on his wife-to-be throughout their entire relationships, so not a big surprise he did it on their wedding night too. Just never thought it would be with me, I thought siblings partners are off limits for everyone no matter what!
5.
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I have the opposite sort of story, my friend "rented" a sloth and had a very quiet party were they fed it sweet potatoes. It was apparently fun and cute.
The sloth came from a conservation organization and you can pay for a "sloth experience" in your home where a guy comes over with the sloth and you hang out for a while.
4.
Totally caused by ME. Drank too much free Champagne (son of a heart surgeon was groom) and I got chucked out of the reception for saying out loud the groom's sister was ugly. Got ousted from the friend group. Totally deserved, I was out of order and extremely drunk.
3.
A worked in a small family restaurant/pub in my small college town while i was in undergrad. We were the classiest "bar" in town, so we had a surprising number of bachelor/bachelorette parties come through. In one particularly bad incident i remember, we were the last stop at the end of a daytime bachelorette party.
They had toured a bunch of wineries/breweries, and most of the participants were trashed by the time they got there (around 4 PM). As soon as they walked in, the bride-to-be disappeared to the bathroom. A few minutes later, we noticed a lot of water begin streaming out under the door. She had puked everywhere, and somehow in the process RIPPED THE SINK OUT OF THE WALL!!! The icing on the cake, her mother in law had to carry her vomit covered butt out of the restaurant. We ended up having to shut down for a few days in order to repair the damage.
2.
Had a distant cousin get arrested on the way into the church to get married.
Credit to the bride. She said it's all paid for let's party. It became an impromptu family reunion. They had the jp marry them a week later
1.
Nothing worse than when one of the friends to the groom had a massive drunken meltdown over the fact that we weren't going to a strip club. Ugly crying and everything.
Redditor churned_applesauce wanted to hear about all the belongings many of us have that could cause quite a stir.
They asked:
"What is the most controversial thing you own?"
I'm not telling you mine.
I'm not that brave.
But let's see who is...
Pennies...
"I have an old Iraqi bill with Saddam Hussein's face on it. It's worth about 17 cents according to Google." ~ postsingularity
Giphy1937
"My grandfather went to the World Scout Jamboree in the Netherlands in 1937, and while he was there he traded patches and gear with some scouts from Germany. By 1937, the German boy scouts had transitioned into the Hitler youth, so I own a Hitler youth boy scout uniform with a bunch of swastikas on it." ~ iamagainstit
Walrus Parts
"My family owns a petrified walrus penis, my grandmother took it to get it identified at the Smithsonian several decades ago. Apparently her grandfather or maybe it was her great-grandfather brought it home after he spent several years on some type of expedition up around northern Alaska and points north."
"It has been loaned out to several museums at different times. The family has talked about selling it but everyone has to agree and so far there is no agreement about selling it. So I own 1/67th of a petrified walrus penis." ~ Robyn_withaY
Propaganda...
"When I was 18, I bought a print of a 1918 German zoo advertisement from a thrift store. I thought the artwork was neat. It had a leopard on it and I was completely cat-obsessed at the time. Turns out the artwork was by Ludwig Hohlwien. He would go on to produce Nazi propaganda." ~ wolfmoral
Jars
"An ornate, Boer tobacco jar from the 1800s. My great grandfather looted it off a dead militiaman during the Second Boer war." ~ deathtotheminutemen
GiphyInteresting.
Nothing too crazy thus far.
Hey, to each their own.
Shut Tight!
"I have a glass vial/small bottle of pure histamine. If anyone would be exposed to this they would get a deadly allergic reaction. I have it double sealed." ~ TheRealMonreal
GiphyHoliday in Kenya
"A complete ivory and ebony chessboard bought a sale of confiscated poacher stuff to fund elephant preservation. When I lived in Zambia and was on holiday in Kenya. My dad bought it and I got it as a hand me down. We were friends with someone who owned an animal sanctuary and their security had shot the poachers as far as I remember. They had a parentless baby hippo as well. It stole my sister's chewing gum and tried eating their cat. It was moved further away from the main houses after it tipped over their Land Cruiser." ~ xxrumlexx
Oh Grandma...
"I wanted a chinchilla really badly as a kid, but my parents said hell no. One Christmas my grandma got me a teddy bear made out of chinichilla fur. Luckily my parents told me it didn't hurt the chinchilla its just like getting a hair cut for them, but they were like WTF to my grandma. I now know better and am also like WTF grandma." ~ lebrunjemz
Snuffed
"I have a set of small bone carved snuff bottles from China (dated to the 19C) with explicit images on them. They’re kind of curiosities in themselves but when my in laws separated my MIL called my husband and asked him if there was anything in the house that he wanted and he said, nothing but the explicit snuff bottles."
"She took them and left them with a note that said ‘I’ve left you, please don’t contact me again. I’ve taken the snuff bottles; they were the only things in the house I liked.' After their separation we got all sorts of controversial hoardings, including a suitcase full of ivory and an abundant collection of Enid Blytons first edition books." ~ waireti
Luggage
"I have a few Ivory jewelery pieces from the early 70s my parents bought back from Botswana, and a poison arrow kit. Mum has the 3-metre long python skin she just put in her luggage from back then too." ~ Icy_Hippo
GiphyWho doesn't have cursed or ancient jewels hidden somewhere?
At least nobody on this thread mentioned faces or eyes.
That's what I was waiting for.
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Reddit user Money-Associate1601 asked:
"What’s something you look forward to every single day?"
A few years ago I wouldn't have had an answer to this, but as I read through I suddenly realized that I have one.
Also, that I enjoy it!
Mornings spent relaxing in the hammock before my day gets punted into shenanigans by my kids, my dogs, my job, or some unholy combo of the three have become crucial for my mental health.
Huh. Who knew?
Let's see what Reddit loves about their routines.
Going To Work (!)
"Going to work."
"It sounds strange, but I love it because I'm working with my son. He’s 23. I’m 50. We spend M-F working together building homes. We laugh all day long."
"It’s the happiest time of my life. I know it’s finite, so I’m enjoying it as much as possible while it lasts."
- thecrab87
"This hits me(23) so much. My dad (50) gave me a job at his company a year ago and always tells me how proud he his of me."
"Just before Christmas he got sick and almost died. When he got out of the hospital he told me how much he cherished our relationship and how it meant everything to him."
"It makes me emotional every time I read things like this."
- Qc-ripguru67
"My brother and I did landscaping together on the weekends. We use to complain about it, but after we sold the business I really missed spending time with him."
"What I miss the most is eating lunch together and riding home after a long day."
- ripped-p-ness
GiphyPajama Party
"Changing out of work clothes and into pajamas"
- send_boba
"My pajamas are my real clothes. Everything else is a facade."
- sharkittens
"The best thing about the pandemic: I work from home all the time and I can wear pajamas all the time!"
- circle_jerker_2000
"Sometimes I get home by 3pm from work and get right into my PJs."
"Even if I’m going out later, I’ll just change out of my PJs when I need to. If I’m home for an hour or longer, I’m in my PJs."
"It’s the only way."
- dat_girl83
GiphyPick Up Time
"Picking my daughters up from daycare."
"As soon as they see me, they drop whatever they were doing and run to me with the biggest smile on their faces and yelling 'Daddyyy!' "
"The absolute sh*ttiest day at work just disappears in that moment."
- all_the_fun_stuff
"100% this."
"Basically anything to do with my kids. Waking them up for school and hanging out in bed for those 5 minutes in the morning is always so much fun."
"Meeting my daughter off the bus from school. Seeing my son when he gets home from preschool and just wants to play."
"Kids are the best cure for a sh*t day at work."
- pdxrunner82
"My 2 year old screams 'IT’S MOM!!!' in absolute delight every day when I get home from work. Nothing else compares!"
- thetermagant
GiphyEmployee Of The Month
"My baby dog’s big morning stretch. He's actually a senior but he will stay about 5 lbs for forever, so we call him our baby dog."
"Oh! And then watching him go back to sleep in his office bed when I start work. He works so hard. Employee of the month, every month."
- maltymawma
"I love working in the morning and then at about 11 am my dog finally gets up. She does her morning back scratches on the carpet and then demands snuggles."
"It's my favorite unscheduled break time that happens daily."
- Food_is_my_Motive
"My cat Ygritte is my supervisor. She works so hard sleeping and making biscuits on blankets/beds/boxes with blankets."
"She yells at me if I stop working, yells at me when it is break time, and starts getting in between myself and my computer 15 minutes before the end of the day."
"She won't stop until I clock out, it is her everyday being like Nahhhhh you done. Pet me instead."
"She is the best boss I have ever had."
- AltruisticProgress9
GiphyNightly Read
"I live at a friends family house. They offered me shelter after I became homeless and every night I go to my car to read."
"I find that reading in my car every night before going to sleep gives this family a chance to get a break from seeing me and I get a chance to be calm and away from everyone."
"They are amazing people and It’s been so fun. I’m so thankful that they let me stay in their living room, but they tend to use it at night to watch a movie or have family time so I take a chance to let them be and I get a chance to learn something and relax in my car."
- AvocadoSaltAndLime
GiphyFueled By Coffee
"My morning coffee. I get a different coffee every week and drinking it is the most relaxing part of my day."
- hafilax
"Same."
"I had a Colombian blend last week, this week I got a black roast that is so strong I swear its making me grow a beard."
"I'm up at 5 every morning for 'me time', which you dont get with 3 small kids and making my coffee and staring into space for an hour is amazing."
- 2_kids_no_more·
"Coffee is mine as well."
"I love to get a big-ass black coffee with a little cream, put on a good podcast and chill out for a bit while I wake up. Quite possibly the only thing I consistently look forward to every single day."
- instinctbluess
"YES! I set up the coffee pot the night before, every night."
"In the morning my husband gets up to start it and crawls back into bed while it brews. When it's ready he puts his robe on and quietly brings me a cup, sets it on my nightstand and goes into the living room to peacefully wake up on his own, staring at his phone."
"In between alarm snoozes I briefly wake up and take a few sips of coffee. After several snoozes, I need a refill and that's usually when I get up to join him. It's such a great way to wake up, I love it so much."
"Some mornings he has to just get up and go off to a job site but no matter how early it is, he brings me a cup of coffee in bed before giving me a kiss and going. He's the best."
- theredheaddiva
GiphyMid-Day Text
"That mid-day text from my husband, asking me if I can please come home early because he and the dogs miss me, usually accompanied by a photo of the 4 of them looking wistfully at the camera."
"It never, ever gets old. So thankful for all of them!"
- luisapet
"Ugh. Mine always wants to know when I’ll be back because he wants something."
- Funny-Tree-4083
"Oh my god I want this. You are so lucky."
- __Vixen__
"I also want this in my life."
"All I get is calls/messages from scammers or customer service."
- amrit-9037
GiphyObserving This Scene
"The sheer, spontaneous joy my dogs have when my wife gets home."
"I tell them 'Who's home?' Then they hear the garage door opening and know Mommy's Home!"
"Batsh*t-crazy pandemonium ensues until I open the side door of garage. Even cuter, my wife is just as happy to see them, too!"
"Nothing beats observing this scene every day, for 11 years."
- Complex-Value-5807
"Absolutely this."
"I adopted a little baby potato two years ago. Now he’s a big old spaz and he has an absolute fit with joy whenever daddy gets home from work."
"He’s so excited he can’t even sit still for pets and kisses. Jumping up and down on the furniture, running around in circles, pure happiness."
- FunnyQueer
GiphyAt Peace
"I have 30 mins in my day in between work where I just sit on a bench in this park."
"No phone, no earphones, nothing but just me enjoying the sound of birds and whooshing of the trees. Feel most at peace during that time."
- DJTISTA
"I have recently started doing this towards the end of the day."
"It has started filling me up with peace and enthusiasm. I highly recommend this. Half an hour, daily, setting sun/rising sun, somewhere not too noisy, near water if possible."
- pappugulal
"Time like this is essential! Good for you for giving it to yourself!"
- Zebsnotdeadbaby
GiphyLunch
"The last 15 years of my working life was running a route, checking into about 235 businesses each month. It kept me very busy, I seldom had time for lunch over 1/2 hour."
"I always thought how nice it would be when I retire, to have time to set down and actually enjoy lunch."
"Fast forward 5 years, I've been retired and now I get one full hour of lunch and reading whatever book has my attention for those 5 days a week instead."
"It's heaven."
- zerogravity111111
GiphySo what have we learned today, dear readers?
The thing most of these Redditors looked forward to was a moment of peace or affection.
Whether it was from a pet, a kid, a book, or a hot cup of coffee it seems people wanted a literal or proverbial hug.
Does that track for you? What's the part of your day you look forward to most.
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