Former Athiests Confess Why They Turned Back To Religion

The Spark Within

"I was raised church of christ in the heart of the bible belt, and they were genuinely wonderful people, but i was an angsty goth as a teen. A lot of horrible things happened to me that drove me to rebel against everything. I was working hard to get far away from home. A few years after HS i quit my job, and moved to SLC for school, and wanted to learn as much as possible with my time abroad. One day my mormon roommate asked me to go to his sunday service, and out of curiosity i decided to go. No, i didnt convert to LDS, but it did ignite a spark in me. The next saturday, i went to my other roommates church that was seventh day adventist and it was really eye opening."

"It was like an open discussion instead of being preached to. After that, i made it a point to try a different church every week to better understand how people worship in their own ways. Ive been to an almost entirely black Baptist church, islamic temples, easter mass at a large cathedral, korean first methodist, and many more. I made lifelong friends, ate all kinds of amazing food, got help during the low times of my life, and most importantly i gained understanding."

"In the end, I found home with a small Universalist Unitarian congregation back in my hometown because everything just clicked. I wish I could share all the stories and amazing experiences i had, but it would be 100 pages long, and I honestly think that the path to finding spirituality is up to you and how much you search for your own soul in the melting pot of the cosmos."

– Fully_Active

Edgelord Begone

"It's not exciting, and kind of weird to me still, but I found comfort in prayer when I was feeling bad about stuff from my younger years, and I guess I just never stopped. I'm not about to spread the gospel or try to convert anyone, but getting back in touch with my spirituality helped me deal with life a little bit more. For the record, I was one of those edgelord atheists that would often try to argue with my religious friends, unprompted, when they just wanted to simply hang out."

– cimeryd

North South East West

"When I was at the lowest point in my life, I had nothing left to live for and needed a reason to keep going and to improve as a person. My SO, my friends, I lost them all to my increasingly disgusting behavior. The core values of religion provided a good moral compass for me and helped me be more patient and in control of my actions. I became a better person because of it, and I found a reason to live. Not to say that atheists are bad people, I just mean that it helped me personally become a better and more patient person."

– Deleted User

Community

"I was born and raised in an atheist household. Starting in high school, I was really depressed and didn't know how to seek help. I loved and continue to love my parents but they didn't allow me to seek medical help. This continued on into my freshman year at college, even though I was living on campus and away from my home. However, I was still stubborn and wasn't comfortable with seeking help. Instead, through an acquaintance I met in a class and, after briefly mentioning about some life issues I was going through, he guided me to Christianity. We would occasionally have Bible study with other students, and I felt belonged. It also warmed my heart to know that God was protecting us all, including me, from evil. In a way, this moment also helped me become a better person by learning to love and not judge people so quickly, help others, and most importantly, love and accept myself for who I am. A few months later, I finally had the courage to get medical help for my depression. I honestly would not have done so had I not become a stronger person in part due to my curiosity and time with Christianity."

– pengweather

Passionately Curious

"As an avowed teenage atheist (having grown up in a non-church-going family), I met a super smart nerdy guy and starting hanging around him. Turns out he talked about his faith in Christ... a lot."

"So one day I blurted out something -- I don't remember verbatim but along the lines of, "Gee, I thought you were smart and understood science."

"He said, "It's because I understand and love science that I believe the Scriptures. Every new archaeological or scientific discovery just keeps confirming what I know."

"He went to great lengths to show me what he meant, and 38 years of marriage later we're still sharing what we learn -- from Scripture or from the latest physics discovery."

– Aphid61

Spirituality Vs. Religion

"Not necessarily religious but spiritual. I was raised Christian, and my mom was very forceful with it. When I was 12, and starting to develop my own beliefs, she refused to accept that I might not be Christian/didn't want to attend church. That just made me rebel and I became a very edgy, angry atheist that hated anything spiritual, period."

"As I got older though I utilized a thing called DBT therapy which is based on Buddhist practices. It made me realize that spirituality could be useful and wasn't all bull. I picked up different theories and bits of religions, whatever resonates, and built my own belief of a "god." I personally call it "source" or "universe." I've been happier, since. It makes the world make a bit more sense, gives me a sense of purpose and comforts me in terms of what potentially comes after death. I'm a kinder, more tolerable person now. As an atheist I believed there was no purpose to life. Everything was random. Now I believe everything has a reason and there's no coincidences, adds a sense of wonder and mystery to even day-to-day life :)."

– Shirrapikachu

Science For Religion

"Not really religious, but eventually hard problem of consciousness convinced me that the current scientific models of reality are fundamentally incapable of explaining my consciousness."

"At that time I was kind of early 20th century science optimist so this was quite crushing realization. Around that time I also found out about Gödel's incompleteness theorems which made me think about many other things which seem obviously true but are not rigorously provable and science suddenly has not seemed as powerful as before."

– Holsten19

Lovecraftian Understanding

"I didn't turn religious in the sense that I follow a religion, but after some pretty intense experiences with acid I came to understand that there most definitely is something beyond the physical plane and that our senses aren't really equipped to understand it."

"The argument for atheism is always that the onus is on religion to prove God exists, which is fine and all but is "God created the universe" really any worse an explanation than "a big bang happened but we don't know why and an enormously complex sequence of unlikely events just happened by coincidence and here we are"?

– Deleted User

Mental Health

"I grew up in a Protestant household but around seventh grade went through some really hard times and developed depression. It became difficult to believe in a God. This year, however, I went through confirmation at my amazing church (highly recommend United Church of Christ churches -- super accepting) and really built my faith. I realized that faith is about just that -- believing that no matter what this mortal world throws at you, He has a plan, and that it's okay when I have doubts and question that there's a God who watches over all 7.5 billion people because I know in my heart that He's more amazing than my human mind can understand and that when I meet him again, I will understand the glory of His kingdom."

– Hipsterpiggy

Leap Of Faith

"Don't follow an established religion, but i now believe there is more than our life on earth. Maybe it's that our "soul" is just a higher dimension we can not tap into in our human form. Maybe there's a heaven and hell, or maybe they're just a representation of the reflection we will endure after leaving life on earth. My lack of religious beliefs changed after a very large dose of mushrooms and hearing experiences from those who have tried dmt, which i really would like to experience."

"Athiesm itself is a religion imo, because you have a belief of something you can not prove, thus requiring a leap of faith. Was atheist from around 12-16, then agnostic, now i guess I'm spiritual? The word makes me cringe but I don't know what else to call it."

– Dan5-O

Resistance

"My family is atheest. I was too. Then, I started hearing people talk about religion and how special it was to them, and I was like "Wow, that's incredible that you have something that you believe In so much." Then, I began reading the bible and thinking about it and realised, I can't believe that there isn't something bigger in our giant universe. It didn't all just poof into existence without some sort of interference, I don't think. What really cemented it, though, was hearing my dad bash it. I didn't tell them I believed in God. They always said they'd be fine no matter what I believed in, but I felt like at the age I was, I didn't know for sure. Then, my dad started bashing people of faith for being "foolish enough to believe in a man in the sky." And for some reason that just made me more convinced."

– Idontknowhonestly44

Shades Of Grey

"I've turned from Atheist to mostly agnostic. When I was 4 or so, I decided that there were some lies in the Bible so all of it must be lies. I saw only black and white, not the many different shades in between. I've let religion back into my life. I'm learning about acceptance of myself, taking time to rest and self-love. I'm learning about being a member of a community, kind of a family."

"I don't go to church every Sunday, I actually rarely do. I don't believe in God or miracles or anything like that. I believe in myself and everyone else. I believe evil people do not exist, that everyone is good, but perhaps confused. I believe in helping others, accepting help when I need it and not overworking myself anymore. I'm happier as an agnostic Catholic than I ever was as an Atheist."

– rhyanin

The Magic Of Religion

"I was raised christian but my parents weren’t very strict. We rarely went to church and i became an atheist to rebel in a way. I was also very suicidal. When i was around 14 i started to develop severe signs of paranoia and depression. I would constantly think about dying and became so terrified of the idea that there would be nothing when i died. I started doing tons of research into reincarnation and wicca / paganism. I am now celtic wiccan, 2 years clean, and proud that i found my faith."

– reddogrunning

Proof

"This is something that gets done to death in religious circles, people use these made up stories as "proof" of god. Plus a solid conversion story sells well, there are plenty of religious authors who made a nice chunk of cash recounting how they found faith."

"This thread is going to be filled with:"

• "sock puppet accounts featuring people pretending to have been atheists who found god (but were really always religious to begin with)""
• "BS strawman accounts of people saying they lost faith because they were "mad at God" or decided at a young age to be atheist just for the edgy shock value"
• "special pleading fallacies."

Acknowledgement

"I found myself surrounded by people who were openminded, kind, and understanding. They saw things others I encountered couldn't, and reassured me I wasn't crazy. They believed me when I told them of the things I'd done in secret, and they shared their stories too. Legitimately, Fae Worship (not genuine worship, but the acknowledgement of fae and acceptance,) has positively changed my life and allowed me a healthy mental, physical, and magical outlet for stuff Ive carried with me for way too long."

– Avarice_Cloak

Open Hearts

"I wasn't atheist really I was more agnostic. But everything in my life fell apart. My mom was going through it all with me. She was telling me about the sermon she heard at church that week that brought her comfort. She never tried to push me to go back to church. But she was dealing better with the tragedy our family was going through than I was."

"I decided that I would try to go to a church near me. I went and everything the pastor said felt like it was talor written for my ears. I went back weekly I said prayers some were answered. Some were not. I felt better. I felt lighter. I am glad I went."

"I wish everyone could find something that makes them feel as content, happy and at peace as religion makes me feel. I don't care if that is a religion an activity or what. As long as they are not hurting themselves or others. I also have no will to push others into my religion or hate and judge others because of religion, race, sexual orientation, or any other reason. I know some religious people do that. I don't like that so many so-called Christians do that."

– Meowow912

It's All About The Truth

"Okay here is why."

"Rather than an opinion about things far and beyond, Atheism is based upon very strong worldly perversions and Political ideologies with a base of negative thinking and extremely rigid opinions. Many like to argue the contrary but this I have deduced with repeated experience in multiple places including reddit."

"Purposely breaking religious duties and deliberately provoking religious people was something I did, too, like the New-Atheists. Its just anger and negative thinking doing the work. That's it."

"As I got out of these things, I slowly realized its true colours. It has no open mind nor any desire to seek. It just venerates what Dawkins and Hitchens say. That's just it."

"I am now a Truthist, as I would call myself. There is a great supreme Truth which is the cause of all Truths and we will one day realise that and unite with it. Thats the Truth and that will be my religion."

– AlbertTheGodEQ

Coming Back

"The last time I walked into a catholic church for service, I was 12 I think. Could not say I believed at that time but I had my communion. My sister was there and I went to get the 'body of Christ' which is basically flour and water. She asked to taste it so I did break the bread in two and shared with her... like I thought a 'good' person would do. The priest came at me, screaming, telling me that I cannot break the 'body of Christ' because it is a sin. He shamed me in front of the entire church. I sweared that day I would never become religious and be related to God in any way."

"I think I started to believe again after I went to college. Being surrounded by scientific minds (I studied a scientific field), evolution theory was highly talked out but I developed a great interest into philosophy also. I would read philosophical books and I became amazed on how the world never changed throughout the ages. Soon, I had a massive bookshelf full of philosophy and I loved it. I just LOVED it. I could spend hours reading, noting and thinking."

But soon, I came accross a philosopher would described the Bible as the greatest philosophy book of all time. So of course, I became interested. I would be reluctant at first because when you share this with left-brainers or atheists, they discredit it immediately."

"But I did anyway. I opened the book telling myself : 'I think it would be a shame to not read the 'best seller' of all time before I die!'. Yes, I had the audacity to say it was simply a best-seller."

"A believer at work would discuss God with me also twice a week. We would sit down in front of a coffee and just talk. He changed my life and he was, I believe, one of the most influencial person in my life before he died at 88 years old... 6 months after we met. I know own his Bible. His wife gave it to me. It is very precious to me."

"And one night, when I started to dig into what money was and the origins of the Federal Reserve, I just simply fell to my knees and asked for forgiveness. I did cry and asked Him to show me the way, that I wanted to give Him my life. It was an experience I will never forget because I felt He was there."

"More things happened after that to strenghten my belief but that's just how I became a Christian."

– ProcessTaz

Comfort Of Religion

"Former atheist, now pagan. It’s something I find a lot of comfort in. I’m able to see parts of myself reflected in certain deities, which makes me feel close to them. Plus it’s nice to have something to look to in times of need."

– spoopy_elliot

Second Chances

"I was raised Atheist but I come from a Latino family and I think other Latinos know what it means when it comes to superstiton and the supernatural. God might not exist but of course spirits and ghosts and other things do."

"I turned towards Buddhism mostly because of my strong belief in the supernatural and in reincarnation, especially because otherwise the world becomes completely unfair and I get angry. How can humans get only one chance? There are kids who die of cancer, or abuse or illness and that's it, that's the only chance they get? It's bullshit and senseless. The world must be better than this."

– coffeestealer

"I'm probably one of the last people you'd expect to end up Christian; I was raised by two staunchly atheist parents and grew up convinced that the God of the Bible was non-existent and/or evil. My conception of God was pretty much that he hated almost everyone and therefore wanted to send the majority of humanity to hell, except the most stringently obedient. Sadly, a lot of the Christians I was exposed to only confirmed this belief in my mind. The fact that I figured out I was lesbian as a teenager didn't help matters."

"My first experiments with religion were really unhealthy. TL;DR, PTSD made me really paranoid to the point where I had a lot of fear of death and people trying to kill me, so I pretty much went "Fuck it, might as well have a back-up plan, right?" and got into theism solely as a way to secure my chances at an afterlife if something should happen. Problem was I hadn't actually revised my view of God at all and still viewed him as very angry and hateful. I remember spending a really long time praying each night "blessing" every single person I knew because I thought that if I skipped someone, God would try to teach me a lesson by killing them."

"I went back and forth between that and atheism for a while. Then, in college, a girl invited me to go to church with her. I was in one of my atheism periods during this time, but I figured why not. She was friendly enough and I thought it might teach me about an experience different from my own."

"To be honest, her church didn't really suit me. Though everyone was friendly there, it was one of those very evangelical churches where people speak in tongues and are "overcome with the holy spirit" on a pretty regular basis. On top of that, it preached some rather conservative views regarding marriage, gender roles, and homosexuality/transexuality that I wasn't too comfortable with."

"But then something happened: the preacher misquoted something from the Bible. He was making a point against trans people and showed a Powerpoint slide that said: "Men and women are fearfully and wonderfully made," therefore it's a sin to be trans. I had read almost none of the Bible, but I had apparently heard that Psalm before because something in my brain went, "Wait, that's not right." When I got home, I looked it up online and sure enough, that wasn't the original quote (it's "I am fearfully and wonderfully made," in case you're wondering). Now, I was really curious and started reading more. I ended up reading the Gospels and was pretty shocked by just how radically compassionate the whole thing was and how much I admired Jesus. It was pretty much the exact opposite of what I'd been taught Christianity was, by atheists and Christians alike."

"I started praying again shortly thereafter, but it wasn't an immediate change. I felt nothing when I prayed and it frustrated me. I felt like if God existed, then he must want me to fail. I was also going through a pretty rough time mentally due to insomnia and stress. Then one night when I was praying, I just snapped. I figured that if God existed, then he didn't care what I had to say, so I just went all out, calling him out for being a shitty God who didn't listen and wanted me to go to Hell, etc. And then something kind of indescribable happened. I don't know, I just felt this huge, peaceful presence suddenly overwhelm me. It felt like I'd spent my whole life dialing the wrong number and then somehow, miraculously, the call finally went through."

"That was pretty much the moment that started me on the path of becoming an actual Christian, though a couple of miraculously answered prayers along the way helped too. Thing is, I still consider myself a fairly rational person. I know a lot of atheists reading this probably have understandable reservations. Like, "Well, you admitted in the beginning that you were struggling with PTSD, so maybe this can be explained as a symptom of mental illness" or "You were emotionally keyed up when you had your 'religious experience' so maybe it was just a symptom of stress." And those are fair points! I'm not trying to degrade them. But the way I see it, if God and Jesus are real, then that's great. And if they aren't and I've just tricked myself into believing in them... also great. It means I've tricked myself into being calmer, gentler, more compassionate person. Not to mention, going to church helped me meet a lot of great friends and get involved volunteering in my community. I feel blessed, no matter what way you slice it."

"TL;DR, Wanted to prove a preacher wrong and ended up becoming happy Christian. Whoops! :)"

– Anaphora121

Perspective

"Didn't turn religious, but I did change the way I look at religion."

"At some point in time, as an atheist, I decided to look into other religions besides Christianity to see if anything appealed to me. Surprisingly, many things I read changed the way I would see the world. I still think that God isn't real, but I treat religions as ways one can become better: I keep the good parts only. I would also interpret things in my own way just for the sake of simplicity, such as meditation being time spent with my eyes closed thinking."

–Euthimo2k

These are some interesting reads!

Do you have similar experiences to share? Let me know in the comments below.