People Describe The Worst Way Someone Has Ever Tried To Comfort Them
Knowing how to comfort someone is a skill that not everybody has. In fact, some of us outright suck at it.
It doesn't make you a bad person -- maybe you're awkward under pressure, or uncomfortable, or didn't have healthy models of empathy. Maybe you just panic and don't know what to do.
A friend once had a beloved and compassionate coworker panic and offer his computer monitor when she cried at his desk. She was gesturing at the box of tissues next to the monitor, but thanks?
He had never seen her as anything other than totally composed and on the ball. Sure, it was a disaster of a day but she was the one who always saved the day without breaking a sweat. Her actually being shaken was such a shock to him that he kind of shorted out and just started panic-offering her things.
Computer monitors are terrible for tear absorption.
One Reddit user asked:
What's the worst way someone has tried to comfort you?
... computer Kleenex wouldn't even crack the top 25. It's kind of disastrous.
Thanks, Teach!Interested Saturday Night Live GIF by HULUGiphy
"So, have they found someone new yet?"
One of my parents died. My parents had been married twenty-five years. A teacher asked me this question five months after the funeral.
She later told my surviving parent that my depression was because I had to share a room sometimes with a sibling. Not because of my dead parent.
A Music Career
At my boyfriend's funeral a girl he went to high school with came up to me and tried to comfort me by saying she knew "exactly" how I was feeling because she was in love with him too.
They never dated, they weren't even friends after graduating high school.
Now she's made a music career from writing sad love songs about him that make it sound like they were together.
Happy Birthday!Episode 4 Birthday GIF by FriendsGiphy
A few years ago, I caught pneumonia, and a stomach virus at the same time. Needless to say, I was really really sick. I was in the hospital for 9 days, and one of those days happened to be my 27th birthday.
One of my aunts that I don't really know was in town, and wanted to come visit. When she got there, she gave me a card for my birthday, which was nice, but when I read it, it said "since this looks like it'll be your last birthday, I'll say my goodbyes now LOL".
Now, I'm all for dark humor, but at that point I'd already lost 14 pounds from throwing up, I had a 104 degree fever for multiple days, I was delirious and hallucinating, and hadn't slept in days. I was in legitimate fear that I was actually going to die.
Told my mom after I was better that I didn't want to see that aunt ever again.
The Original Owner Of The Book
People say and do some weird sh*t in attempts to comfort others. Myself included.
But the biggest stand out was when my mother was first diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer (she is doing great now). She received a second hand book called Cooking and Coping with Cancer.
The original owner of the book didn't need it anymore ... because he died of cancer. So his wife thought my mom would like it.
The intention was kind, but it was just a bit depressing.
When I had my first miscarriage, husband and I were attending a Word of Faith type church.
Their words of "encouragement" were that our baby had died because of some hidden/un-repent sin in my life + my faith wasn't strong enough, and I should just keep praying.
You would think that a church of all places would embrace you in your suffering and loss.
These guys (& gals..) just kind of out-casted us like we would bring them bad luck.
It was a weird time, and after that I found it hard to hang out with any of them or believe most of what they were teaching.
We went on to have a healthy little girl and found a much less toxic church, but to this day if anyone mentions the prosperity gospel to me I have a lot of things to say.
No Dogs Go To Heavendon bluth 80s GIFGiphy
My wife and I got a dog back before we were married. GREAT dog. Wonderful animal. Very much our first child.
Fast forward a few years and our sweet girl had to be put to sleep. I was at work and upset about it. I couldn't stop leaking a little just thinking about her. My very Catholic friend told me that, if it was any comfort, dogs don't have souls.
Panic And Dog Food
I was this person unfortunately. I don't react well with sudden bad news and often say the first thing that comes to my mind out of sheer panic.
I went to get my hair cut in college and as I sat down the small talk started. She asked how things have been blah blah blah. I asked how she had been (it was our first time meeting) and she says "my dog just died."
Immediately the alarms are going off in my head, a man is running around my brain blasting a whistle trying to figure out my next step.
"At least you'll save a ton of money on dog food now."
No... Please no!
Unfortunately it was already said, everyone stopped what they were doing immediately, you could hear a pin drop. She just continued cutting my hair for what was the quietest haircut I've ever got. I couldn't even apologize I felt so bad and so awkward.
I just shut my damn mouth and looked straight ahead while hoping I still had both my ears by the time I left.
"That's What Drug Addicts Do"
My cousin died of a drug overdose, my father called me to tell me the news.
After I got off the phone, visibly upset, I told my husband (now ex) what had happened. He said:
"Well what did you expect to happen? That's what drug addicts do, they die. And he did it to himself, there is no reason for you to shed a tear, get over it."
then went back to playing video games.
I didn't even know what to say to that, and just went to the other room to mourn by myself. It was an abusive situation and I am still in the process of getting divorced 2.5 years later.
How NOT To Treat A Phobia
I used to have a phobia of scarecrows that began when I had a repeating nightmare where I would be chased by one in a dark cornfield.
A girlfriend I had in high school invited me along on a youth group trip. She didn't tell me much except we were going to a camp the next state over and would be doing things like going to an apple orchard.
The first full day, we all get on the bus, and she tells me that we were going to a corn maze.
She hid this from me as she thought it would help with my phobia given she'd be with me and it was day time... I dumbly agreed and made it through the maze while white-knuckling her hand the whole time.
When we got out, I asked how much longer we'd be at the maze... that's when she told me about how it turns into a haunted corn maze at night... anyone want to take a guess at what the actors were dressed as...
It did not turn out well in the slightest.
I had a huge anxiety attack mid-maze and tried to make a b-line for anywhere not the maze by running in a straight line through the field. I got disoriented, I got lost in the field, I could feel my heart pounding out of my chest, I was in the literal setting of my nightmare... and there were multiple scarecrows chasing after me.
Imagine the best day of your life.
You're surrounded by people you love, you're at your favorite place, you're eating your favorite food, and you're favorite band is playing a playlist they put together just for you.
Your ex shows up and admits all their faults and ask your forgiveness without asking to be apart of your life. Your current crush pushes them aside and says they've always had a thing for you and gives you a puppy of your favorite breed saying it is a symbol of your new love....
What ever you're feeling in that moment... what I was experiencing was 100% on the f*cking opposite side of the spectrum.
I eventually desensitized myself to scarecrows by watching movies like Wizard of Oz and Batman Begins on repeat. I'd still slap the teeth out of anyone if they try to get me in a corn maze though.
Things didn't work out with that girl.
I'd rather Burger King
On the day my mother died, I got home after looking after my family, dealing with undertakers etc and the first thing my boyfriend said was he needed me to drive to KFC to get him something to eat. He is now my ex. I wish I could say that was the worst thing he did but it wasn't. That crazy thing is, I don't think he ever acted out of malice, which was a bit of a headscrew because half of me was thinking "he doesn't mean it" so I'd give him the benefit of the doubt and the other half of me knew that if this was just the way he was, nothing was ever gonna change.
It's not Tinder TimeFuneral GIF by memecandyGiphy
When my husband died, someone reassured me that I was young and would find someone else.
At the wake. He was literally not in the ground yet.
During my dad's funeral, when I was a teen, some women told me while I was crying « stop crying, your tears will only multiply and drown your father on the other side ». How about you shut the hell up.
When I miscarried my son my husband's mother told me "Don't worry, you can always have another baby" I know b**ch, but I wanted THAT one.
It's About Me!excuse me omg GIF by CBCGiphy
Been dealing with diagnosed depression for a few months now and lots of people including a therapist said "it's been a rough year for everyone."
Those worse off...
Absolutely hate when someone says "there are people who have it worse." Like I know that, of course I know that, but I'm not talking about other people I'm talking about me and how I feel matters just as much as anyone else.
It's called the fallacy of relative privation, or plainly put "There are starving children in Africa that have it worse."
Just cause you can name someone who has it worse than you doesn't invalidate or make your pain any less important.
I once said to a colleague, who had struggled to conceive, that the positive was she'd gotten pregnant, so it could happen again. And I have never forgiven myself for being such an insensitive cow. I was desperately scrambling for something positive, and I should have stopped at "I'm really sorry dude, that's freaking crap."
Honestly I can see where you were coming from, you were trying to give a silver lining in the bleak situation. I had a similar situation where I worked in a large company, and I had a weekend off only to come back with a baby shower gift and nappies and wipes to surprise a pregnant coworker.
I started talking to her about baby shower themes while her eyes welled up with tears. I stopped and asked what was wrong, she promptly left the room sobbing and I sat there like a knob until another coworker discreetly told me that she had an ectopic pregnancy and ended up having to get one of her fallopian tubes removed. I sought her out after giving her some time and I apologized profusely. I still think about it a lot.
Just Drownweird fish omg GIFGiphy
They told me there was plenty more fish in the sea. At her funeral. And it was her uncle.
Foot in Mouth
Imagine saying to someone who lost a foot. "Well, there are people who've lost both their legs." I'm sure there are, but how does that help me when I'm suffering? It's the ultimate selfish behaviour. It screams, "I'm uncomfortable and uninterested in your suffering, so I'm going to belittle it and imply that you should be grateful for it."
"Your feelings are weird, stop feeling them."
I've had "why are you crying that's so pathetic" so now i don't cry in front of people and when i do i have panic attacks.
"Cheer up, other people have it worse than you."
That's the rudest and most malicious way to tell somebody to get over something.
Yeah, like dude, just because some person is homeless somewhere does not mean my feelings are basically an insult to others.
Telling me to "calm down" when I'm angry.
Dude my dad does that! He's all like "relax, calm down" but doesn't give me space to do so. I tend to self soothe so I need five minutes to myself but he expects me to just turn off my feelings then and there.
I just posted elsewhere this, but that is just crazy. My parents are very religious and when she had her first child she was stillborn. And the people from the church told her God had to kill her because she was going to grow up a criminal. Churches are insane places. She went on to have three healthy children... but how do you move on and continue to go to a church with people who talked to you/believe that.
I hope everything has turned out well for you and you're healthy and happy!
B Negativebritney spears wink GIFGiphy
Toxic positivity. I just learned about this and was thrilled there was a name for why I distrust and don't like people that are aggressively positive.
Age 8: I was getting super bullied, on account of being obnoxious, smart, and having zero social outlets aside from school.
One morning I told my dad, in tears, that it felt awful to not have any friends. My dad was 35-ish at the time. His response was to tell me that he doesn't have any friends either. I argued that he went to work all day and everyone there was at least nice to him. He said that only made them acquaintances, and we just have to deal with it.
Edit: oh crap I'm 35 now. And you know what? The last response I'd have to any beleaguered kid is that hey my life sucks too.
It's just the flu...
Pretty much everyone telling me after losing my grandma to COVID that everyone has lost someone, and everyone is suffering. Basically saying w/o saying that no one gives a crap about me and that I need to shut up and deal with it.
Change the Station
I was crying about not being invited to a party in high school and felt like a loser in the moment. My brother just put on the song Creep by Radiohead.
I was crying in elementary school, I guess the other kids were mean or something, and my teacher, who, in my eyes, had all the personality and joy of a steamed cauliflower, told me "hey, kids made fun of me when I was your age and I turned out fine!" I wouldn't be surprised if I started crying harder as a result.
New PlanLuise Kinseher Yes GIF by Bayerischer RundfunkGiphy
I'm a Christian, so a lot of people hit me with the: "It's all part of God's plan."
I believe it to be true, but that doesn't make it helpful in the midst of really difficult circumstances.
Let me Be...
I honestly hate when people try to ignore or dismiss my feelings, when they pretend like what I'm upset about isn't there or doesn't matter. Like, I get that to them, they may be trying to send the message that it's no big deal, and that life can go on and maybe they're trying to distract me or something, but it's honestly patronizing and insulting. I'd rather face my mess honestly and process it, then move on. I don't need to be treated with kiddie gloves, and I tend to distance myself from people who can't seem to stop using them, even when asked not to.
I started to get teary and that's when my early 20's male cousin said to my sister (14) and I (15f) in a rather creepy-tone, "You girls have grown up nicely" while we were getting ready for our grandmother's funeral.
Well, you can always try again.
This was about 30 seconds after we found out we had lost our twins, after years of infertility treatments, and the heartache of not conceiving each month.
Why Bother?Excuse Me What GIF by One ChicagoGiphy
My old boss tried to prevent somebody from going to their mother's funeral because, and I quote, "going to their funeral wouldn't bring them back to life, so you might as well be at work."
We covered for that person and let them go.
First one that comes to mind is that maybe it's good I can't have children because I'm disabled anyways and maybe it's better if I don't.
"sorry about that"
After my mom died from a 2 year battle with melanoma and lymphoma, someone I know said "sorry about that" and then proceeded to tell me all about their problems with their car and parents and friends for 25 minutes. I couldn't even get another word in. I felt totally like they were competing with me and didn't seem to care about my stuff at all. Really made me sad.
Such Sincerity... :(
Once in college, a girl I was dating and really liked ended things out of nowhere. I shared this with my mom and her response was "Aww she probably just likes somebody else." Still not sure why she ever thought that would make me feel better.
Simple Inhalepaper bag GIFGiphy
I was having an asthma attack and couldn't breathe at all, my friend had left to find my puffer from my bag, my teacher came up to me and said "try to breathe, it's not hard just breathe slower."
You're Still Breathing
To set the scene: a job opportunity that has sounded too good to be true was. Our cat had died unexpectedly and my father in law was being moved to hospice. I was on the phone with my mother weeping bc everything was going wrong and her response was "at least you've got your health."
"Don't be sad," was told to me at my father's funeral.
Or my favorite, "You're ugly when you cry."
Haha, I should have mentioned that these quotes are from separate events.
"You're ugly when you cry," was just my mom's way of trying to get me to stop crying when I was 5 years old or something. Honestly, it just made me hysterical. Pretty funny to me now though.
Let's test that theory...
Telling me it was God's will when a loved one died.
God wanted that person dead. Great, thanks 👍.
Ugh. So many people said that to me when my mom died. In my head I was like what if I killed you right now, that would be God's will right? I'm still bitter towards people but not that bitter lol.
"Here, let me give you a motherly hug!" From some dumb dirty drunk middle aged dirt bag a month or so after my mom died when I was 20.
Flipped out callin' me a goof, and I was an ignorant little crap, oh yeah it was wild lol.
Jig it Upjamming adriel favela GIF by Cornelio Vega Y Su DinastiaGiphy
After our first family cat died, my Irish grandfather tried to "cheer me up" by playing jigs on the accordion.
It had just the opposite effect, even though I appreciated his good intentions.
You can go now mother...
I was in the hospital for weeks after brain surgery and then a staph-meningitis infection. I wasn't allowed to shower, i threw up almost everything i ate and i couldn't walk unassisted/unaccompanied so i wasn't free to roam. I was very depressed, tired and in pain. My mother's friend came by to "visit me" (she was really there for my mom) and the one time she did talk to me, it was to tell me about how her son got into a car wreck of his own doing.
He was hospitalized with very serious injuries including several broken bones and was temporarily paralyzed from the waist down. Her point being "others have it worse." Very crappy thing to hear when you're stuck in the Nuero ICU for weeks.
I told a friend I liked him as more than that and he told me he didn't feel the same way. When I told my girlfriends, they tried to comfort me by saying he has to be gay. I'm like "no he's not, he just doesn't want to be with me like that and that's okay." But they kept insisting that he's gay because of it. They were trying to make me feel better and not bad about myself, but it just made me mad that my friends were making stuff up about my guy friend.
Cancer is Evil
My mother in law always responds to stories of my relatives' health struggles with cheery affirmations of how healthy she is and how glad she's never had to deal with these things.
When my grandma died.
While my father was dying of cancer.
When my sister was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Her response to hearing other people's troubles is always 'well that's not my experience!'
I have sometimes have panic attacks that leave me in a mindset where I can't fully function as a normal person for an hour or two afterwards, and they're 90% of the time caused my by mother. One time, I got triggered because she was saying specific things about my family and as soon as I calmed down (my mind hadn't recovered yet, but I wasn't crying anymore) she started saying them again, but in a comforting tone and alongside things like "I'm only doing this so you can know the truth."
Needless to say I got insanely pissed off at her and locked myself in my room for the rest of the night.
Time PassesMr Bean Waiting GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"So it's been awhile, then." It had been six weeks since I lost my grandmother when someone said this to me. Her loss didn't seem real yet, let alone 'been awhile.'
but you still have some coin...
I remember telling my dad I was sad and he told me one of the worst things you can say to someone who is and he said something along the lines of "at least you're not in debt" as if that negates my sadness. It's equivalent to saying "someone has it worse than you so don't feel bad." That night, he bought me a sandwich and he thought that would take care of it. He's emotionally immature and not in touch with this side of things at all. He's a real "focus in the positive" guy, but that, at least to me, is another way of saying "just don't focus on it."
My dad had died in my arms and was traumatized by it. I was telling my story and someone yelled "SUCK IT UP YOU'RE A MAN!"
My dad may of died in my arms but I'll strangle the life out of a little jackoff with my bare hands.
But since murdering isn't an option I yelled "OK TELL US YOUR TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE A** WIPE!"
"Well my dog died my mom took it to the vet and put it down. But I didn't cry about it!"
Sure. Totes same...Meme Wtf GIFGiphy
When my mom died.
Coworker told me "I know exactly how you feel because one of my cats died recently."
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Hiring Managers Break Down The Weirdest Things They've Ever Seen In A Job Interview
Most of us have had a few jobs in our lives, and we've learned to be on our best behavior during the job interview.
But sometimes even when we're doing our best, we might make a mistake, like blanking on the answer to a question or spilling coffee on our pants.
There are other people out there, however, with far stranger stories.
Curious, Redditor Muchachi asked:
"People who have interviewed potential new hires, what are some of the weirdest or worst things you've encountered during the interview?"
"A woman handed in her resume in person (this is an important detail for later). She seemed normal enough, looking for a part-time job. She was new to the area and was checking out opportunities. This is a grocery store she was applying to."
"She called me the day before, panicking and asking for directions to our location. It didn't seem like she knew she was talking to us as she was asking for directions to the store. (Now she was here yesterday, dropping off her resume.)"
"She called to say she was going to be late, because she forgot about an appointment."
"She called to reschedule the interview for the same time and day as the interview. She seemed to think it was a different day."
"She called asking which bus to take to the interview."
"She called to reschedule again."
"She showed up four hours early, wearing two different shoes."
"Each time she called she sounded more and more drunk. It was sad. She clearly needed help."
About Those Random Drug Tests...
"I used to be the hiring manager for a store in a mall. Our back room was pretty tiny, so we did interviews in the food court. Usually, it was pretty empty when it wasn't around lunch or dinner time so it wasn't hard to find a table that was far enough away from everyone else."
"I was midway through interviewing someone when I saw a girl I didn't recognize walking towards us."
"She came over, sat down with us, put a little white pill on the table, and said, 'Take this pill' to the guy I was interviewing."
"Then she asked if I wanted one without actually saying what it was."
"When I said no, she started asking how I knew her friend. I told her I worked at a store and was interviewing him for a job, and she just said, 'Oh cool,' and just continued to sit there."
"It took a few minutes for the guy to get it through to her that we weren't friends who met during an interview but that this was the interview that she had crashed. Once she finally got it, she picked up the pill, got up, and wandered away."
One-Way Ticket to Amazon
"Interviewing for student workers at a College Bookstore. So we got a pretty wild variety of characters, but none like Lorenzo."
"This dude comes walking into the interview in some tattered cargo shorts, a dirty White Tee, some flappy broken sandals, long mangy hair, and a scraggly beard. But the best part was the gourd. He had a good-sized gourd hanging from a hemp necklace around his neck that he was using for a water bottle."
"Now the Assistant Director and I both have a pretty solid sense of humor, and we know this interview is going to be special."
"We began asking him all the usual questions. Why do you want to work here? What were your favorite past jobs? All of which he answered really well, far beyond our expectations."
"At the end, we always had a fun question in there as well. We asked Lorenzo if he could go anywhere right now, where would he go."
"He passionately said, 'AMAZON! I would go to the AMAZON!' and got up and started dancing around the office. 'I'd go do a rain dance in the rain forest! Man, I wanna go so bad!' And then he pounded the gourd."
"Best interview ever."
"Sadly, our Executive Director flat out NO'd Lorenzo. The AD and I were tragically disappointed. We really wanted to give him the job, just to see what happened. He became a bit of a campus legend, and we really did regret not being part of his journey."
"Rumor has it that after graduation, he boarded a plane to South America and was never heard from again. Dance on, buddy! Dance on!"
"Crying. She explained that she just cries sometimes for no real reason and I accepted her explanation."
"She was a good hire. I would swing by her office and sometimes she would be in there crying and working away."
"She was a graphic designer, this was at a design firm, and she was referred by someone I trust...12 years on, she has three kids and is doing good."
No Wrong Answers... Apparently
"I wasn't on this panel, but an older man being interviewed responded to two of his questions with 'That's a stupid question' and 'You tell me, you work here.' Needless to say, he didn't get the job."
"Another man bought lunch at the time of his interview and then complained he was being disturbed when someone went to call him through."
"I have so many."
"One of my favorites was an early morning interview at a large job fair the company I had just been hired to was hosting at our local convention center. This candidate has been there the night before and completed her application and some assessments and was asked to come back in the morning to interview."
"She was DRUNK y’all. Not hungover. Hiccuping, slurring, stinking drunk. She tried to hug me rather than shake my hand."
"It was another woman and I doing the interview. She asked the candidate why she had left her last job and she said, 'Well, it’s like this, ya see. . . Me and my old man, we was getting a divorce (hiccup)... So then I started sleeping with a whole bunch of guys at the office. Then me and my old man? We got back together, and now I’m not allowed to work there no more.'"
Date For Hire
"I worked in HR (Human Resources) for a long time. I was usually the first person new hires went through for admin jobs."
"I interviewed one guy who was creepy beyond words, winking at me, biting his lip."
"At the end, he said, 'Well, I’m pretty sure I blew this interview, but would you hire me for a date?' I told him he has 30 seconds to leave before security was called."
Waiting Room Drama
"While waiting for her interview, I had a lady get into an argument on the phone with her roommate about leaving her sex toys in the dishwasher."
History Repeating Itself
"I was interviewing someone who casually mentioned that one of their dogs had died after being left in the car during her work day. She then went on to ask if we have a place where she could keep her dogs at work."
"We do not, to which she replied that that’s ok, they could stay in the car."
"We were hiring for a dog trainer position."
"I had a 24-year-old, college graduate, come into the interview with her father. I had multiple interviewees, so when I called her name and they both stood up, I told him it wasn't a group interview and he'd be in when his name was called."
"He looked at me and said, 'I'm her father. I'll be sitting in on her interview.'"
"I looked at both of them and said that wasn't happening, and he was not welcome to join us in the interview room unless he was an applicant on my list."
"He literally took her by the hand and walked her out. That was eight years ago or so, and I still think about that poor woman. I was 25 at the time and couldn't imagine that being my life."
"The one that stands out the most to me was hiring for a new computer tech. Was a nice guy, and seemed to know the basics but was clearly new to the field. When I asked if he had any questions for me his first one was, 'What is the process for transferring to a new position? I'm only applying here because there aren't any openings in accounting.'"
"Umm, yeah, dude... Tell me right away you don't really want that job and don't intend to stay at it. I just looked at him blankly for about 15 or 20 seconds and I think it dawned on him what he just did."
"The interview basically ended there and I thanked him for his time and said I wouldn't be calling. I hope he learned from that."
Not a Team Player
"I was interviewing a graduating senior for an entry-level designer position, a position that would have required her to work closely with a writing partner and less directly with an entire team."
"I asked her how she approached working in teams and she said, 'Oh, I hate working in teams. Every time I do, everyone ends up ganging up on me, so I want to work alone here.'"
"Might as well have just ended the interview then and there because that's not and never will be how advertising works."
"I pointed out her portfolio and asked her how she'd created those pieces. Hadn't she worked with a writer on the headlines or the body copy?"
"She said no, her professor let her do everything herself because she'd told him she 'refused to work with anyone.'"
" I can't remember what school she went to, but they did her a massive disservice by letting her think that was normal."
At Least They're Honest
"Not an interview, but yesterday I received a resume that said, 'I really think it's time for businesses and companies to change the way they hire everyone. I have been out of work for over four years already and it's getting ridiculous. I may have not grown up in [redacted] but I am more than qualified for all the jobs I applied for.'"
Gotta Keep Up the Gym Habit
"Not majorly weird but always stood out to me:"
"I was on the interview panel with the owner and project manager as I was in charge of training new hires."
"A guy came in wearing skinny jeans and skater trainers. Already, I know the owner is annoyed because he's a stickler for the dress code (shirt, trousers, shoes) in the office."
"His CV said he's already experienced in what we do so we asked him some basic questions about the work he's done and he gave some vague answers that didn't really explain anything or indicate any real experience."
"Partway through the interview, the owner said that I'd be training him should he be successful, and he very obviously sneered and rolled his eyes."
"At the end of the interview when asked if he had any questions, he said he likes going to the gym so he'd like two lunch breaks because of the amount of food he needs to eat and also to actually get to the gym. The owner says we can discuss that if he's successful."
"The project manager and I didn't want him but the owner said we should invite him back for the second stage competency test and asked if I could contact him because he noticed the eye-rolling."
"The owner also made a comment about him being scruffy and told me to make sure he comes dressed for work."
"I invited him back and told him exactly the sort of thing he was expected to wear."
"He turned up a week later wearing the exact same stuff from his interview. It was clear during the (quite simple) competency test that he'd barely done this type of work before, if at all."
"He also turned up with two large tubs of pasta for the competency test and stopped partway through to eat one of them despite only being there for two hours (which was supposed to be an upper limit)."
"I asked him at the end if he had any questions and he asked what other responsibilities I had because I obviously wouldn't need to spend much time training him. I sidestepped that and he repeated the question about two lunch breaks."
"The owner phoned him the next day to tell him he wasn't successful and he offered his services on a freelance basis for both work and training, even sending a follow-up email offering the same thing a few days later."
The Beginnings of a Parasocial Relationship
"I interviewed this lady who seemed okay, but we didn't hire her. Then she kept emailing me, asking questions about the job (after she knew we hired someone else), and then she emailed me asking to meet up and 'hang out.'"
While we may have made some mistakes in our interviews, these deeply cringe-worthy accounts are bound to make us feel better about the slip-ups we may have experienced.
It's so easy for us to get caught up in the negative things in our day-to-day lives, whether it's a bad day at work or an ended relationship, but it's important to remember what else we have going for it.
Sometimes the best thing to do is to listen to the people we look up to, and let their words help us move through the tough time.
Redditor Miller1xo asked:
"What's the best advice you've ever received?"
It's Not That Important
"No one cares."
"That's actually the advice."
"The vast majority of people are more concerned about going about their own days and doing their own things."
"I kept being too socially conscious of myself around others, believing that every move I was making was being monitored and judged all the time."
"But the reality was that, just like me, everyone around me was just focused on themselves and what they were doing and not at all on others."
"And if anyone did anything out of the ordinary or 'embarrassing,' we all forgot about it the next day."
"So once I realized this, my social anxiety essentially disappeared after a month and I was far more comfortable in my own skin."
The Bad Comes with the Good
"Life sucks, get a helmet."
"And life is like a s**t sandwich, every now and again you gotta take a bite. But the more bread you have, the less s**t you taste."
The Great Aunt Has Spoken
"Three rules from a great aunt:"
"Go to the restroom while you have a chance."
"If there's a seat available, sit down."
"If someone offers you a breath mint, take it."
"If you ask, they might say yes. They might also say no, but if you don't ask, it's always a no. So ask."
Nothing Can Change if Nothing Ever Changes
"Not making a decision IS making a decision."
"As someone who struggles with indecisiveness, this has been an important one. It's easy to get wrapped up in analyzing options, especially what could go wrong. Sometimes the decision paralysis is worse than the consequences of a suboptimal choice."
Take Care of Your Body
"Look after your back. You will be sorry in later years if you don't, and it's much easier to look after it now than try to fix it later."
Progress, Not Perfection
"Doing something imperfectly is better than not doing it at all."
Perfection is an Obstacle
"There's a common phrase, 'Don't let perfect be the enemy of good.'"
"I like to adapt it: 'Don't let perfect be the enemy of done.'"
Let It Go
"The best advice I ever saw was from Bo Burnham on a talk show. Conan O'Brien asked the standard question: 'What advice would you have for other young people who want to pursue their dreams like you?'"
"He responded: 'Well, my advice for you would be to take a deep breath...and give up. I got to where I am today purely because of luck. All these celebs today like Taylor Swift telling you to 'be yourself and follow your dreams,' it's like saying 'liquidize your assets, buy Powerball tickets! get rich! it works!' It doesn't work.'"
"'...Ten years ago I was just a dumb, skinny white kid who didn't know what he was doing. Now the only thing that's changed is I'm famous.'"
"Just do whatever you want, and if you get lucky and hit it rich then that's great. But it probably won't happen."
Put Yourself Out There
"Hard work alone won't do sh*t for you. Chance encounters, a seemingly small conversation, and Cosmic timing have a much bigger impact on your success than hard work alone."
"In my case, there was a random LinkedIn message from a recruiter and a gut feeling I should respond to it. That led me to have a successful job that values work-life balance and pays way more than my previous company."
"Networking is an example of this. If you happened to know a guy who knows a guy, you can land pretty sweet jobs over someone who quietly works overtime all day every day."
"The family you are born into can also play into it. Apologies to Taylor swift fans, but there isn't anything special about her. If she was an average person, she would not have had the same level of success. Her family's connection to the record industry played a huge part in her initial success."
Dump Her Back
"My first love left me for another guy. I was visibly depressed, and my Granddad asked, 'What's wrong with you?' I told him. He responded, 'Dump her back.'"
"I was bewildered. What the f**k does that mean?"
"Then, a few months later, my ex-girlfriend got dumped by the new guy and pleaded with me to take her back. It got to the point of her stalking me."
"I stood firm and dumped her back."
Perspective is Everything
"While driving one day, I was p**sed that someone cut me off when I had the right of way."
"My Great Grandfather told me, 'There's a lot of dead people who had the right of way, too.'"
"I never forgot that advice. It may not be the best advice ever but it always stuck with me."
"A hundred dollars isn’t a lot to have, but it’s a lot to need."
"If you have little kids, triple sheet their beds, alternating with full-size waterproof pads. So: pad, sheet, pad, sheet, pad, sheet."
"In the middle of the night when you have work in the morning and they wet the bed or throw up or get a nosebleed, pull up one layer, toss it into the laundry, and put the kid right back to sleep."
"Also, if anyone in your house isn't feeling well, give your kid a bucket or something next to their bed in case they wake up feeling sick. No one likes to clean up a trail of vomit from the kid's room to the parent's room or bathroom in the middle of the night."
Surround Yourself with People Who Support You
"When no one's got your back... move your f**king back."
Each of these concepts are great ways to get more out of life, but the big ticket item here is perspective.
So often, we exaggerate things, whether how embarrassing a mistake was or how hard it will be to complete that task or how bad we think we have it, but if we compare that to someone else's circumstances, or how small this moment is in the grand scheme of things, it suddenly becomes easier to be more grateful and take more from life.
People Who Make Good Money And Don't Hate Their Jobs Explain What They Do For A Living
Few people earn a living doing what they love.
That's why those in the workforce call showing up for work "the grind"–which implies labor-intensive tasks for long periods of time.
However, there are situations in which employees love their jobs and don't even call their labor of love "work."
They just happen to earn money doing what they love. Who are these people? Where are these jobs?
Strangers online discovered what it's like for those who have it good when Redditor puffmonkey92 asked:
"People that don’t f'king hate their jobs and make a decent wage, what do you do?"
Those who work out in the field love the work they do.
"I work in a logyard in S Oregon. Log trucks come in and are unloaded. The load is rolled out on the ground, and I scale the logs. I measure the lengths and diameters, calculate the gross volume in board feet, and make deductions based on defects such as frost seams, insect damage, burn scars, lightning strikes, etc. I work outside, so it can be rough in the winter/summer, but it keeps me moving, and it's an interesting gig. Been doing it about 6 years now. AMA"
Working With Mother Nature
"National Park Ranger. Thirty-two years and counting. As with any profession, there are still bad days."
Working in near isolation is ideal for these Redditors.
Behind The Scenes
"I work in the pathology lab at a hospital. I process blood and biopsy samples onto microscope slides for the pathologists to read. I love it! I feel like I’m helping people, even though I never meet them and they have no idea who I am."
The Happy Statistician
"I’m a statistician and work with a government agency. I particularly really enjoy not having to interact with too many people."
Reliable Computer Expert
"I am the only IT guy for a family owned business. They know nothing about computers so as long as everything is running smoothly they leave me alone. I only put in about 45 minutes of actual work every week."
Movie-Watching All Day
"I’m a colorist. It’s like photoshop for movies. I love it. But I feel very lucky to have this job, and to be successful in the industry."
"I work as a housekeeper at a motel. I love my job. It allows me to work alone, I can listen to my music, and I enjoy making order out of chaos. Also, the money's pretty damn good. Because of the way our pay is structured, I make more than double the standard amount in this industry."
Some people prefer working in customer service, depending on the job.
Joy Of Seeing Satisfied Customers
"Electrician. It’s hard work most days, but satisfying seeing it all lit-up and functioning properly."
"Knowing my work will still be in service many years from now feels good, and seeing customers marvel at their new light fixtures looking great is a good feeling."
"I work at a pet store (only supplies, no animal sales) and make $18 CAD/hr. That might not sound 'decent' but it's better than minimum wage with no meaningful increase in responsibility (aka stress) compared to any other retail worker. In fact, my work environment is lower stress than any other retail/food job I've had and the owner has a keen interest in our well-being. Yearly raises, Christmas bonus, profit sharing, get paid our full scheduled shift if it's shortened or cancelled for weather, aiming to become a living wage employer with promises to increase wages beyond that so long as the business continues to grow."
"Plus no one asks 'why' if I turn down a shift or decline to stay later. Respect for personal time is huge. I'm treated like a human being, not a robot with no life outside work."
Keywords: Security & Freedom
"I’m an accountant for a bank."
"Good salary, great benefits, tons of PTO and all holidays off."
"It’s not particularly exciting, rewarding, or fulfilling but it gives me the security and freedom to make my life as exciting, rewarding and fulfilling as possible."
"I am a kennel attendant. I care for and feed both dogs and cats. One of my daily requirements if I have time to do it, is literally to play with a dog/cat or puppy/kitten. It’s called animal enrichment. It’s meant to help prepare them for a life outside the shelter. Doesn’t even feel like a job."
Based on the responses above, it's not unusual for people to find jobs that are fulfilling and make decent wages.
Unfortunately, many workers end up feeling stuck at their jobs because they are settling, but for good reason: the reasonable salary.
But if they're unhappy in spite of a good living wage, is that really the kind of life that's worth living?
There are always better alternatives. If you want to be unstuck, taking a leap of faith is very rewarding.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained right? Go out there and find your dream job!
People Break Down The Most Disturbing Wikipedia Pages They've Ever Come Across
Every now and then, who hasn't found themselves falling down a Wikipedia rabbit hole?
Even if the sources of information found on the page are dubious.
This doesn't stop people from using it as a quick source of information when necessary.
And with links to other pages readily available, people often find themselves learning information which was a far cry from their initial search.
Gaining information that these same people would no doubt be much better off having never learned.
"What is the most disturbing Wikipedia Page?"
"Albert Fish is so disturbing, I remember the first time I read about him I was literally nauseous."- Lazy-Day5802
"I find this as much depressing as disturbing."- YouKeepThisLove
List Of Youngest Birth Mothers
"I think the most heartbreaking thing is that that damn list is so long..."- AliyanaRose
Lawrence Bittaker and Roy Norris
"These guys are some of the worst of the worst."
"During the filming of Silence of the Lambs and working with former FBI agent John Douglas (author of Mindhunter) for some time, actor Scott Glenn thanked him and said how fascinating it was to have been allowed into his world."
"Douglas laughed and told Glenn that if he really wanted to get into his world, he should listen to an audio tape of serial killers Lawrence Bittaker and Roy Norris torturing, and murdering two teenage girls."
"Glenn listened to less than one minute of the tape, and has since said that he feels he lost a sense of innocence in doing so, and that he has never been able to forget what he heard."- sully-fied
The Murders of Channon Christian and Chris Newsom
"The Murders of Channon Christian and Chris Newsom page is pretty bad."- Apartment_Unusual
Less The End Result, More The Process
"It’s not the page that is disturbing, it’s thinking back to where you started and hour ago and wondering what the f*ck happened!"- noigenoigenoige
The Anthill Kids Cult
"The anthill kids cult https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roch_Th%C3%A9riault"- periczache
"What the actual f*ck."
"I should not have read that."- Nico_MyTrueSelf
"The fact that he was underweight after doing all this."
"What the hell did his poop look like since he wasn't digesting properly?"
"Or maybe his stomach acid was TOO strong and there wasn't much nutrition left for his intestines?"- bigmacjames
"I don’t think I was the same person after reading that page and seeing the pictures on it years ago."- 88Smilesz·
Murder of Sylvia Likens
"That's one of the most horrifying things I've ever read."- Trini1113
"There are many things I can read without feeling uncomfortable in this thread."
"But this... is on another level."- Pure-Destruction
"It is very strange and uncomfortable to read the Human page on Wikipedia."- LedZacclin
"The Wikipedia entry on humans makes me uncomfortable."
"Feels like it was written by an AI or by aliens."- Darmok47
Murder of James Bulger
"Haven't seen this posted yet."
"Still baffles me how little kids can kill."
"Changed the justice system in the UK for what it is today."- HighestBounty
Murder of Santos Rodriguez
"Holy sh*t."- UnitedStatesUS·
Wikipedia can be an endless source of information.
At least 80% of which you would probably be much better off not knowing.