The LGBTQ+ Community Shares Their Worst 'I'm Not A Homophobe But...' Experience

No 'but.'

Seriously. Just don't say it. "I'm not a homphobe-" and stop. There doesn't, and shouldn't, be anything after those words. Anyone who keep talking is no ally to anyone in the LGBTQ+ community. These stories are prime example of how.


Reddit user, u/ithriveintoxicity, wanted to hear about:

LGBT+ members of Reddit, What is your worst "I'm not a homophobe but" story?

Toss The Dad Out. Get A New Dad.

Coworker said "I have nothing against gay people but the worst thing that could happen to me is if my son came out as gay".

There are so many terrible things that could happen to your child, but you're worried about him being gay? I honestly feel sad for this child.

MsBrainless

Gotta Advance That Plot Somehow

This definitely could be worse, but it's still incredibly annoying. When someone says "I think it's fine that shows have gay characters, but I hate it when they have it for no reason." Ah yes, because we all know that the universe made me a lesbian simply for character development.

DearAmanda17

Going To Make Those Neighborhood BBQs Really Awkward

Had a conversation with some ex-neighbours (straight couple, nice people) who both studied to become teachers, we were all the same age, around 24 back then. We often met for drinks and it was fun, at some point I mentioned something that gave away I was gay (something like "I texted with a guy" or something) and I actually assumed they knew, but the girl asked "oh you're gay?" and she didn't seem shocked just curious.

And it wasn't a big deal and we kept talking and they seemed very cool and suddenly she asked "but when did you decide to become gay?" and I thought she was joking. But she was dead serious. I tried to explain that that's not really a thing but she insisted that it's a choice and reversible. I was kinda in shock and we stopped hanging out then. Was weird.

CampeyBene

Asked That Question In Front Of Everyone? Yeesh...

During orientation week at university we had a whole talk on being accepting of the LGBT+ community. Someone put up their hand and said that they weren't homophobic but confidently believed that God would never put someone in the wrong body and argued that transgender people are something discussed but aren't in fact present in every day society.

The lady holding the talk calmly said, "Well I was born with a penis and would you have known unless I told you? Am I some mystical being? Do I appear not well adapted to society?"

You could see this man with his hardcore outdated, conservative mentality had quite a shock to the system.

BenevolentCactus

How Do You Say Something Like This With Your Kids Around?

When there were last presidential elections in Finland we had a gay candidate. My mother once said "I'm not a homophobe but I will move to Sweden if (the gay canditate) gets elected. I just can't live in a country where the first lady would be a man"

(fun facts both me and my other brothers is gay)

Kajjis

Eye Opening, Indeed.

My (ex)best friend and I were watching some video and there was this really effeminate guy in it.

He says to me, "God, don't you just wanna punch that guy in the face?"

So I say, "Why?"

He says, "Because he's so f-cking gay."

I say, "Dan, did you forget that I'm gay?"

He says, "No, I don't care that you're gay. You're one of the good ones."

That was an eye opening day in several ways.

KamehameHanSolo

Homophobes Suck Big Time

My "psychology" teacher in high school (mostly she just showed us the movie Sibyll) was told that I was an out lesbian and said, totally seriously, "huh. I thought only ugly girls went lesbian." She said this to my high school English teacher who was the only out gay faculty member at the time. He told me later and we had a laugh about how much homophobes suck

circeskelter

That's Not...No, That's Not How That Works.

In the dorm my freshman year of college, one of my floormates came out to a group of us as bi. Another woman, a self proclaimed "gold star" lesbian, told her she can't be bi because bi women don't exist. When asked to explain, she said, "Bi women are just s*uts who haven't found the right d-ck to satisfy them." And then later defended herself to the RA by saying she can't be homophobic since she's a lesbian... yeaaah.

Thoriel

Toss The Mom Out. Get A New Mom.

My mother told me "I accept you and all, but sin is sin. So, you being gay is the same as you murdering people and I just can't associate with that."

Ok. Thanks mom lol.

CarboniteClarinet

You Settled In? Strap In.

I got a "haha it's ok if you're gay as long as you don't hit on me like I'm not homophobic it's just weird" from my coworker where the girl got convinced I was in love with her and started being really annoying about it and was gossiping about it behind my back to our coworkers about how obvious I was about being in love with her and how I stared at her all the time and was being creepy.

This was total bullsh-t, I barely paid attention to her in general, especially after the whole "don't hit on me" thing. Our coworkers would tell her she was being an a-- and I wasn't into her, and one eventually told me what she'd been saying, and so I started scheduling my shifts so I wouldn't have to work with her.

She changed the narrative so that it was a "oh now she's obviously heartbroken that I don't feel the same way and is avoiding me" and one day when I was working a shift with her (I had picked up a shift for another coworker so they could go to a friend's birthday party) before we opened, I overheard her telling the girl at take out that she wasn't looking forward to having to work with me and get ogled.

I finally snapped and told her in front of half the staff to cut it out, because I wasn't and had never been into her. I mentioned she wasn't my type anyways and thought that was the end of it, but she accused me of lying and said I was obsessed with her, so I told her if anyone was obsessed, it was her because I got a text from a coworker nearly daily telling me what she'd said about me.

She later tried telling my manager that I was discriminating against her for being heterosexual. It was a mess.

Kikospeaking

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Europeans Break Down Which Things Americans Aren't Ready To Hear Yet

"Reddit user Mamutu7 asked: 'Europeans, what is something us Americans aren’t ready to hear?'"

Even though the United States of America is largely viewed as the best country in the world to live in, many Americans dream of living abroad.

Particularly in Europe.

From their eyes, there are several things about one's way of life that simply seem unquestionably better in Europe, including health insurance, education, and food.

Of course, many of these things are just in their minds and aren't actually true, and they have to have the news broken to them rather gently.

Sometimes, however, the things they've grown to accept about Europe aren't worse than they imagined, but infinitely better.

Keep reading...Show less

Ahh... life before the 90's.

The talents and skills lost.

There were ticket takers at the cinema.

When buying concert tickets, there was a human you stood in line to meet at 10AM on a Saturday morning.

You had to purchase tokens, not Metrocards in NYC to ride transit.

So much change.

Who can keep up?

Who will remember?

Keep reading...Show less

All of us, if we really give ourselves time to think about it, know some pretty interesting things.

But while some things we know could be reasonable conversation starters, some of us know some things that are just plain weird.

Keep reading...Show less
Newborn baby crying (perhaps over their interesting name)
Photo by Tim Bish on Unsplash

Choosing baby names is one of those tasks that's a weirdly hot-button subject for some people who believe their opinion should always be taken into consideration, even when it comes to someone else's family.

But sometimes, listening to a third party's opinion would not be the worst thing.

Keep reading...Show less