Men are a mess. I can say that because I am one.

We can be better. Yes we're coming off of generations of madness and holding in feelings... but now is the time to learn and grow.

Or just keep looping the madness.

Women have a keen instinct when it comes to explaining the way men can represent themselves as... less than desirable.

Time to chat gents.

Redditor ANONIMkiddowanted all the ladies to have a sit done and spill some tea the boys need to hear... they asked:

"Girls, what makes a guy instantly unnatractive?"

Why can't we just be real?

That is always my first question.

Over Her

"Talking about his ex girlfriend all the time..." ~ No-Afternoon6018


Lose Control

"Uncontrolled anger issues." ~ reaubsew

"Happened to me too - it was an unprompted no context pic of his bloody fist after he’d punched a wall (I had to ask for context). IDK which is worse, getting into fights and bragging about it or punching walls and bragging about it. He def has a few screws loose (the fist picture was when I realized, but unfortunately too late) and still virtually stalks me years later." ~ sofiacarolina

Be kind...

"Being condescending... Instant no." ~ bellachuuu

"I worry about this, since I tend to tease that way. I'm pretty good about knowing when it's appropriate, but sometimes playing along and being offended can feel very similar." ~ Polymersion

Bad Personality

"Controlling personality." ~ DweedleDee69

"Hi! This seems to be a fairly common issue. Will you please provide some examples and do you think age differences might contribute? What is an example of one’s intended good actions that are interpreted as controlling?" ~ AgreeableMoose-

"Limiting who you talk to men/women -limiting what you can wear in public -isolation from friends and family -deciding where and how much you work -limiting access to social media or makes you delete altogether -doesn’t let you go places without them -goes through your phone -'who are you texting/talking to.' There’s more examples but I don’t have all day. But they always say 'I only do this because I love you.'” ~ DweedleDee69


"Confidence is sexy. Ego is not." ~ powderedtoastsupreme


Ego is always a problem.

Love yourself yes, but don't be elitist.

Be Clean

"Bad hygiene. Anger management issues. Laziness and dependence on others to get things done. Same things that make girls unattractive." ~ Person9183736



"Poor manners." ~ Cat_Astrophe_X

"I had an ex talk about my dinner manners and how a past guy had extremely bad manners. I took cotillion and learn the proper dinner etiquette. She loved it. After she is gone I still do dinner parties and set 6 course meals for friends. Everything I learned in cotillion, my mom forced me to go, hated it then, love it now." ~ polyphemus69

Sushi Issues

"Constantly interrupting and one upping. I hate when they won’t allow anybody to have a moment of their own. I knew someone who wouldn’t even allow people to have their own tastes. As an example, someone said they liked sushi. His response was, 'you don’t know what real/good sushi is.' WTF they didn’t say they were experts in what sushi should or shouldn’t taste like, they just said they liked it."

"It wasn’t just positive things either. Someone would complain about a body ache or pain and get responses like, 'it can’t possibly hurt as much as my (insert injury here) so you need to just get over it.' Dude we get it, nobody can be as smart/traveled/experienced/sick/wounded as you." ~ cellendia


"Through years of anger management I’ve learned that anger manifesting itself in physical release (punching walls, kicking, etc) releases endorphins which is why it’s so easy to just resort to that, I had this problem myself growing up."

"Learning to realize it’s futile, and that it wont achieve anything or solve the problem is really the key point in solving such tendencies. Took me a while but I can’t control pretty much everything now, except if I’m watching a raider game I will be yelling non stop lmao." ~ Stellar_gz1724


"When he is married and hits on you 😕." ~ Own-Audience-830


Have you been listening boys?

I hope you took notes.

I did.

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