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People Explain Which Things They Wish Everyone Would Stop Romanticizing

Karen Warfel / Pixabay

Listen, if your twenties are the best time in your life then, barring something seriously tragic, you did life wrong. I have no idea why media tries to paint a person's twenties as the peak of their life.

Young people, please understand it is all lies. Your twenties are probably going to be a raging dumpster fire where you have no idea WTF you're actually supposed to be doing, but you're pretty sure you're doing it wrong.

One Reddit user asked:

What is something that people should stop romanticizing?

You know my answer. Check out what these people had to say.

Sacrificing For Your Job

i feel sick sigh GIF Giphy

Being willing (or forced) to sacrifice your own health for your job.

So many times I've listened to people get into bragging competitions about who has been the sickest and still gone to work. F*ck that noise, if I'm sick I'm keeping my @ss at home!

If there's one thing I hope COVID is able to permanently put to rest, it's the idea that going to work sick is in any way acceptable.

Employers are 100% on the hook for this.

F*ck off with your "lean staffing" plans (read: deliberate, chronic understaffing) and offer sick pay to your employees so that they don't feel like they have to come in and infect the rest of the staff when they're sick.

- lachwen

Trauma Is Not Trendy

I've joined some groups for bpd support and stuff and been dismayed to find they're filled with teens who have just post cringy memes and talk like anime characters.

There are even trendy words. I tried to explain to someone a couple years ago about how I got too high and started dissociating (like actually felt like I was a robot and out of my own body. Absolutely terrifying) and I didn't realize that "dissociation" has become a trendy buzzword to mean.... I don't even know what, but they were like, "Ah, yes." like they understood exactly what I meant.

- bob-omb_panic


Romanticizing trauma, basically. Dissociation can be super scary.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, and the number of people I've seen online that basically appear to want this disorder is appalling.

I'm in a good place now and love my alters, but for a while there I was hospitalized with sky high anxiety and all I did for 12 (sometimes 24) hours a day when I was finally home was try to manage my emotions while switching from alter to alter.

I spent all day every day not knowing if the horrible memory I just got in a flashback is real and I've forgotten it or not. It's not fun being like that at all.

- MizElaneous

He's Abusive

Joker and Harley Quinn's relationship.

He's abusive, people.

- CaptainPrower

As someone who has been in an abusive relationship and can also kind of understand romanticizing theirs, it's complicated. I think that maybe a lot of women like me have been in similar simulations and can find comfort in knowing they're not alone.

None of this is an endorsement, by the way, but I do get it.

- Cobie1232

Main issue with this one is that I'm willing to bet that nearly all of the Joker/Harley lovers have only gotten their view of them via the Suicide Squad & Birds of Prey movies.

There was no abuse shown in those movies (it was kind of implied in BoP, I guess) and that is why the emancipation part of BoP fell flat for me. We never really saw the abusive relationship or the truly messed up stuff that I have heard of from the comics.

- RaHarmakis

It's Harder And Kind Of Sucks

Disability. It hasn't given me "a whole new and different and unique and special perspective on things."

I just can't see as well, it makes life harder, and it kind of sucks.

- robetofontiglia

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Thank you!!

Honestly, I'm so over this "you can do anything you set your mind to!"

No I can't. I'm disabled.

It's hard for my to do a lot of stuff. And that's ok. Some times it gets me down and that's ok too. I don't have to be the embodiment of positivity because I'm disabled.

- DramaticFantastic


Yesss! Visually impaired and chronically ill here.

It's totally fine to be happy for someone's accomplishments, but the inspiration porn needs to stop ASAP. So done with that sh*t.

And the idea that you can do anything if you just work hard? Well 1, no. I can't do anything.

But more importantly 2, I shouldn't have to work 10x harder to barely meet your standards and then get told that my disabled peers are doing way better than me. That's ableist, not inspiring.

And it's also what got me kicked out of college cause it was so inaccessible.

- theblindbunny

Just Normal

Gay people.

For pete's sake we're not unicorns. We're not inherently cuter or more inspirational or whatever people like to say about us.

If you wouldn't fawn over me if I were with a guy, don't start melting into a puddle because I'm with a girl.

- an-ineffable-plan

Trans person here.

I appreciate that American society (or at least where I live) has gone from borderline legal to murder me to treating me like I'm a special, I really do.

But more than anything I just want to be left alone.

- BW_Bird

You want to be - hold the phone - treated as an equal to any other "normal" person.

Crazy, right?

- DeceiverX

Hustle Culture

People need to stop romanticizing "Hustle Culture". People need to understand that overworking does not lead to being overpaid. You are just going to end up being overworked and burnt out.

Just be consistent in whatever you do.

- izanaglizanami

It's like an even more twisted version of the Protestant work ethic.

Instead of suffering hard work in this life to get into heaven, you're suffering hard work just to maybe, if you're really lucky, afford to live in a house like the one you grew up in rather than a rabbit hutch in the stabby part of town.

- AdmiralGinge

Young Love

leonardo dicaprio love GIF Giphy

Young love.

Your first relationship most likely won't last. It'll hurt when it does end, but it's not the end of the world.

Romeo and Juliet was a tragedy, not a romance. The story is about two young people (Juliet is 13) who over the course of 4 days have a forbidden love and then commit suicide.

- dring157

Cultural products like music and movies especially f*ck up kids who are dealing with raging hormones and insecurity.

The idea that you are supposed to find TRUE ETERNAL LOVE with another confused kid puts on so much more and unrealistic expectations.

- hungrylens

The Feel-Good Nature Of Bad

Cheating and other "forbidden fun," with relationships. So many songs nowadays embracing the feel-good nature of a bad decision.

- jonoflashh

Cheating. In the media it is shown as a love story, nobody shows the suffering that the betrayed person suffers, the pain, all the trauma. These people are always abusive, ugly, unsuccessful, all as a way to "justify" adultery!

- mranderson789

Post Bottoming Out

I am bothered by the romanticized view of the post-bottoming out rehab process. Movies love showing people sitting in circles telling horrible stories. In real life these are stories about how you hurt yourself and loved ones very deeply.

- kraziefish

Fix You First

Stop romanticizing getting pets, having kids, or getting married when you're unfit for that.

People need to address their own sh*t before they add another living being (partner, child, animal) to the mix.

People either don't give it much thought and think that's what they have to do. Or they think adding one of those things to their lives will fix whatever issue(s) they have going on.

Also, people that don't have children sometimes are called "selfish."

I think people (especially people with serious problems that are not being addressed) that have children are just as, if not more, selfish than children-less adults. These people think the world needs another one of them running around or they are using this human or animal to serve some purpose for their lives.

- HungryArticle5

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romanticizing

People Describe The Most Traumatizing Thing They Ever Experienced As A Child

Image by Anemone123 from Pixabay

Life is hard. It's a miracle to make it through with some semblance of sanity. We are all plagued by grief and trauma. More and more people of all backgrounds are opening up about personal trauma and its origins. Finally! For far too long we've been too silent on this topic. And with so many people unable to afford mental health care, the outcomes can be damaging.

All of our childhoods have ups and downs and memories that can play out like nightmares. We carry that, or it follows us and the first step in recovery is talking about it. So who feels strong enough to speak?

Redditor u/nthn_thms wanted to see who was willing to share about things they'd probably rather forget, by asking:

What's the most traumatizing thing you experienced as a child?
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childhood

People Divulge The Real Reason Why They're Still Single

Image by klimkin from Pixabay

Being single can be fun. In fact, in this time of COVID, being single can save lives. But the heart is a fickle creature.

And being alone can really suck in times of turmoil. None of us are perfect and it feels like that's all anyone is looking for... perfect.

Now that doesn't mean that all of us are making it difficult to partner up. Sure, some people are too picky and mean-spirited, but some of the rest of us are crazy and too much to handle. So one has to be sure.

The truth is, being single is confusing, no matter how much we try to match. So let's try to understand...

Redditor u/Mcxyn wanted to discuss some truths about love and our own issues, by asking:

Why are you single?
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being single

Chefs Divulge The Most Important Tips That Amateur Cooks Need To Know

Tiard Schulz/Unsplash

Whether you're an at home parent, a college student just leaving the nest, or a Food Network junkie, there are a few basic tips that everyone should know.

Chef's gave us some of their top tips for amateurs and beginner at home cooks that will really make a difference. They are trained professionals with years of experience in the kitchen, so they definitely know what we're all missing.

If you're looking to improve some of your cooking skills and techniques, but you're still learning how to boil water correctly, this list is for you.

Redditor BigBadWolf44 wanted in on the secrets and asked:

"Chefs of Reddit, what's one rule of cooking amateurs need to know?"

Let's learn from the masters!


What a common mistake!

"A lot of the time when people add salt to a dish because they think it tastes flat, what it really needs is an acid like lemon juice or vinegar."

- Vexvertigo

"Instructions unclear I drugged my dinner party guests and now they're high on acid."

- itsyoboi_human

"Yes! Or tomatoes. They're pretty acidic too and go with so many things. Our dinners are so much better once the garden tomatoes are ripe. Or if a dish is too acidic, oil/butter or a little sugar can help add balance to it."

- darkhorse85

"Like tomato and eggs. Every Chinese mom makes those slightly differently and I haven't had a tomato egg dish I didn't like yet."

- random314

"There's a book called 'Salt Fat Acid Heat' that comes highly recommended to amateur cooks."

- Osolemia

"Reading even just the first chapter about salt made a lot of food I cooked immediately better, because I finally understood salt wasn't just that thing that sat on the dinner table that you applied after the meal was cooked."

- VaultBoy42

"Salt is important for sweets. A batch of cookies without that little hint of salt doesn't taste quite right."

- Osolemia

Unfortunately, this tip might not be accessible to everyone. Many people who contracted COVID can no longer use their sense of smell the way they used to.

"Have a friend that lost his smell from COVID, and now he only recognizes if food is salty, sweet, sour or bitter."

- AlphaLaufert99

"Just wait until he gets his sense of smell back and a ton of foods smell like ammonia or literal garbage now. Yeah, that's fun... It's been 7 months for f*cks sake just let me enjoy peanut butter again!!!!!!!!!"

- MirzaAbdullahKhan

You can't take back what you've already put in.

"You can always add, but you cannot take away."

- El_Duende666

"I find people's problems usually are they're too scared to add rather than they add too much."

- FreeReflection25

"I see you also grew up white in the mid-west."

- Snatch_Pastry

Safety first!

"Not really a cooking tip, but a law of the kitchen: A falling knife has no handle."

- wooddog

"I'm always so proud of my reflexes for not kicking in when I fumble a knife."

"If I drop anything else, my stupid hands are all over themselves trying to catch it (and often failing). But with a knife the hardwired automatic reaction is jump back immediately. Fingers out of the way, feet out of the way, everything out of the way. Good lookin out, cerebellum!"

- sonyka

"Speaking of KICKING in. On first full time cooking job I had a knife spin and fall off the counter. My (stupid) reflex was to put my foot under it like a damn hacky sack to keep it from hitting the ground. Went through the shoe, somehow between my toes, into the sole somehow without cutting me. Lessons learned: (1) let it fall; (2) never set a knife down close to the edge or with the handle sticking out; (3) hacky sack is not nearly as cool as it could be."

- AdjNounNumbers

"Similarly, NEVER put out a grease or oil fire with water. Smother with a lid or dump baking soda in there (do not use flour, as it can combust in the air making things worse)."

- Metallic_Substance

How else will you know it tastes good?

"Taste the food."

- OAKRAIDER64

"Also don't be afraid to poke and prod at it. I feel like people think the process is sacred and you can't shape/flip/feel/touch things while you cook them. The more you are hands on, the more control you have."

"No, this does not include situations where you are trying to sear something. Ever try flipping a chicken thigh early? That's how you rip a chunk out of it and leave it glued to the pan until it's burnt."

- Kryzm

Here's one just for laughs.

"When you grab a pair of tongs, click them a few times to make sure they are tongs."

- Kolshdaddy

"People really overlook this one. You've gotta tong the tongs a minimum of 3 times to make sure they tong, or else it can ruin the whole dish."

- BigTimeBobbyB

If you're looking to get into cooking or to improve you technique, pay attention to these few tips.

Salt generously, add an acid to brighten things up, and don't forget to taste your food!

If all else fails, you can always order take out.

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cooking

People Describe The Most Inappropriate Thing They Ever Did As A Kid

Victoria_Borodinova/Pixaba

As part of the learning process, children often do embarrassing things before they learn a little more about the world and all the different implications therein. While the inappropriate moment is usually minor and ends in laugher some instances are truly mortifying.

One such instance involved a little sister who was around 6 at the time. It was the 90s and at the height of the youth-focused PSAs (think the frying egg representing your brain). One type was a safety PSA about stranger danger. The speaker would remind the children that if a stranger tried to take you anywhere to yell “Stop, you're not my mommy/daddy" to raise the alarm.

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