Say Cheese! ....Haha, whoops, sorry! Your mortal enemy would get a kick out of seeing that photo of you. Especially if it's at a wedding. Especially if it's at YOUR wedding.
u/NotAnAcorn asked Reddit:
Wedding photographers of Reddit, what is the worst moment you've captured on camera?
Here were some of those horrific photos.
SURPRISE!
During the portrait time with the bride and the groom, the bride reached her arms up to hug the groom, who was significantly taller. She was wearing a strapless dress. The dress stayed put, and the rest of her made a surprise appearance. I did not deliver those images.
The Weather Won't Hold
The wedding was on a pier. The couple and the planner kept checking the radar on their phones for rain to decide if they should do the wedding on the pier, or take it inside. I looked out on the pier and said to them, "I don't know what your radar says, but those are rain clouds." They make the call to do the ceremony on the pier anyway.
About 3 minutes into the ceremony, it starts to rain. Out of nowhere, a man appears with a heart shaped wicker box. I always ask the couple if there is anything different about the wedding I should be aware of. They never said anything to me about this, so I was caught off guard. Cool. Fine. I just keep shooting. He hands the box to the bride. She opens it up, and there are two doves in there. Ok. Pretty cool. I've heard of a dove release, but had never actually seen one. But, there doves were NOT feeling it. They just sat there and were like, yeah, no, fuck this, it's the beach and it's raining. Bride looks at bird handler. Back at the birds. Shakes the box. Nothing. He motions for her to scoot them out of the box. She reaches in there and they immediately flee the box. They both fly directly into her face. I shot in burst mode, and got a pretty wild sequence of shots . One of the birds gets caught in her weave, and she shakes her head while swatting at the bird to free it.
Then the bottom falls out. Pouring rain and heavy winds. The officiant continues like nothing is happening. Zero sense of urgency. People are just getting up and heading inside. One of the family members gets up in the middle of the aisle, and starts screaming and chanting. "JUST SAY I DO! KISS!" They do, and it starts raining even harder. I backpedal down the pier as they run through the rain. The shots of them running through the rain are actually pretty beautiful.
The whole wedding was a complete mess. They ended up telling me that I was the only thing that went right on their wedding day, and that looking at my pictures made them happy, and that the pictures made the awful day look beautiful.
We Know That, Rob
I filmed a guy pushing a baby carriage. The two sides of family were not fans of one another and I was filmed a nice moment where a gentleman was making baby talk to a baby in a push carriage. The baby reached for his beer bottle and the guy let the baby touch it. Well the father of the kid grabbed the beer bottle and chucked it down the field then shouted at the guy "you don't give beer to kids!" So the beer guy got a mean mug and shoved the carriage a bit. I got it all on tape from about 20 feet away. Even got a cutaway of the smashed beer bottle the guy threw.
A Good Deed Goes A Long Way
Maybe not the worst, but the saddest. My wife shot a wedding for a bride and her father died later that night in his sleep of a heart attack. My wife made sure to give them all the nights photos, over 1500 photos, and edited them all for her. Usually she only gives 350 to 450 photos for a wedding package. Anyways, really sad situation. Those photos meant the world to the bride and she's been a return customer for years now. Super sad for the bride though.
Got there way too early since I had to do some pictures of the place and some of them pre-ceremony. Met the future husband, talked to him and his bride about what I would do. The ceremony starts and everything is going nice enough. I had to be ready all the time in case they call me or something happens so I was constantly close and scouting for them. Sometimes I would see some good moment or had some idea and I would tell them if they wanted a picture so I'd take it. At some point the couple is no longer inside so I go around to look for them. I spot them outside in the back of the place, which was a beautiful patio with decorations and all that thing. They are just close, talking side by side with heads slightly tilted towards each other and I think "Aww yeah this is going to be a great pic" and I try to come closer without them looking. I take the picture with my zoom and only then they simultaneously notice me and I notice that they have the saddest faces I've seen in a bride and groom.
I ask if everything is okay and they say yes so I let it go. Not my place I said, but when the party was almost over the groom approached me and in the middle of the conversation he says that the ceremony was so exhausting for them because they knew almost nobody there. It turns out the mother of the groom "had" to have a wedding for her son and orchestrated the whole thing without them knowing, and invited her friends and family, and then let them know that they would have to come from where they lived (which was far away) to their wedding. That was on top of the fact that the son wasn't on good terms with his mother and the bride hated her. Apparently the mother was very abusive and manipulative. The only person the groom knew was his brother who got very drunk as soon as the ceremony allowed him to, and the bride knew nobody.
Later looking at the photos I noticed that when the two were together alone they looked lovely and happy, but their warmth would slightly die when the mother was present in the picture, but that might be my confirmation bias I don't know.
I remember that the groom said "I probably know you more than I know most people at this party" and had me sit down, eat cake and drink with him and the bride and wait out the rest of the people.
I didn't send them that picture of them although I always wondered if I should have. They were very intimate and enduring something together and it was a very good picture outside the emotion.
No Aunt Of Mine
There was this aunt of the bride or groom (not sure which) who wore a dress that I'm pretty sure was actually meant to be a long blouse. She got plastered at the reception and was dancing in the middle of a circle of people so I peered in between two people and snapped some photos of her. Didn't realize until I'd gotten home and pulled them up on my computer that her "dress" was bouncing up when she jumped and exposing her crotch.
This was a wedding that I shot for an event company, so the way that works is that I just turn over the raw files to the company and an editor edits them and delivers the album to the client.
I forgot to give them a heads up about the it but you'd think they would notice.
Nope.
I wound up seeing the couple's final album in the system after it had already been emailed to them, and low and behold Aunty vajayjay is in there.. and out there.
Here Comes...Something
Did freelance photography for a while after I graduated high school. Got hired, along with another photographer by a company to shoot a wedding. This company instructed us to get as many candid photos as possible per the request of the client. The other photographer was female and we split up during the preparation phase and I hung out with the groom and groomsmen and she went with the bride and bridesmaids. Her session with them was largely uneventful. Mine was... less so.
It became clear that the groomsmen had been drinking for a while when I arrived and that did not stop. For the groomsmen getting ready took only a few minutes, put on tuxes, boom done. So we had a few hours to hang out while the bride got hair/makeup etc. done. The groomsmen took full advantage of this period to get, absolutely obliterated. I got a few good shots during this as the camaraderie between these guys was clear, unfortunately it was like a four way enabling session as they poured each other more shots, played ill advised drinking games, and tried to psych each other up for more of the same.
Once the time for the ceremony rolled around they could barely walk straight, and the groom was the worst off of them. I broke away from them to get my position for the ceremony and let the other photographer know what a shit show this was getting ready to be. She told me that the bride had expressed concern that the groomsmen would get too drunk before the ceremony. We both just kinda braced ourselves for what was to come.
The ceremony started and the groomsmen came up the aisle in a parade of painfully obvious inebriation. The groom stumbled and almost took a knee at one point, and almost completely ate sh*t stepping up to the little platform where they would say their vows. Then the bridesmaids came in and watching their anger and concern bloom on their faces as they took in the groomsmen standing unsteadily on the dais is hilarious in hindsight, but felt like a slow motion train wreck in the moment.
Then the bride, oh god that poor bride, entered the church and even through the veil you could tell she was vacillating between fury and sadness. She stepped up to the little platform and in the silent moment between the music fading away just before the pastor could begin speaking one of the groomsmen ripped a horrendously loud fart. The bride's face fell, half of the people in attendance started laughing while the other half let out a breathless, disgusted, gasp.
The groom barely stifled a laugh, and one of the other groomsmen turned and punched the farter in the arm. It was as if these dudes had no clue where they were or how important the event was to everyone but them apparently. The other photographer and I did our best to get shots and just do the job we were getting paid to do. It was difficult to get any close ups of the bride or groom as the bride settled on f*cking furious for her facial expression for the remainder of the ceremony and the groom was a drunken sod who could barely focus his eyes on his bride. She uttered her vows through gritted teeth and he slurred through his while slowly rocking back and forth.
The reception only spiraled out from there. The groom threw up on the floor before the cake cutting, and was ensconced somewhere. After one of the groomsmen struck out with the bridesmaids he set his sights on the other photographer. eventually our agreed upon time ran out and we got the f*ck out of there. I handed off all of my RAW files to the company that hired me and wished them luck on editing that travesty.
Tell Him "Boy, Bye!"
I was filming a wedding ceremony for some friends this summer. The bride's stepfather was sitting in the front row. She had already warned me that he could be trouble, so I made a note of where he sat down before the ceremony started.
He sat down in the front row and promptly fell asleep. For the whole 20 minutes ceremony he slept. I was so angry on the bride's behalf, who sits on the front row and then can't stay awake for the few minutes the ceremony lasted?
I managed to avoid him in the final edit, thank god.
Count It On Down
Former short lived wedding photographer here, hope that still counts but my Top 5 are:
5. Capturing the 4 year old nephew of the groom as he began projectile vomiting like a fountain in the pews during the "I Do's".
4. Taking a picture of the cake being cut just as the Bride's drunk cousin stumbled into them from behind, basically body slamming into said cake.
3. Realizing during the family pictures that they were being photo bombed by two other guests having awkward sex against a tree in the background.
2. Capturing the moment as the Groom's mother (who yes hated the bride) sneezed big wet, gooey snot etc. into the Bride's hair minutes before she was to walk down the aisle.
1. The couple had fed each other the first piece of cake nicely, not smashing into each others faces. Groom distractedly went to grab from the stack of napkins for his and new Brides sticky frosting fingers. I got the moment where he had accidentally grabbed the knife, cutting his fingers and spraying the cake with blood. Turns out he still had low iron after over coming cancer and bled like crazy.
For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
tsunami GIF
Giphy
"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
Scared The Launch GIF by CTV
Giphy
"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
Who Are You Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
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"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
Giphy
What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
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Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
Giphy
Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
Giphy
Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...