We've all wondered what ever happened to the one who got away. Perhaps we dated them once, and it didn't work out. And we've all at some point entertained what our lives would have been like had we actually gone ahead and pursued relationships with people long gone. Relationships are, in lots of ways, about timing.
Thanks to Redditor melancholyoversmiles, who asked the online community, "Have you ever met someone and thought "wow, if we had met at a different time, we would have made a great couple"? If so, what happened?" we could listen to the people who opened their hearts.
"I liked this boy at school..."
I liked this boy at school when I was 14. I wasn't allowed to date (strict parents, first girl) but he liked me too. A decade later I run into him at my university of all places and we catch up and he tells me he always liked me and I liked him so we go out. It was fun. It was nostalgic. Lasted like a month before he told me he's like super gay. So... yeah it didn't go anywhere after that. Turns out we did not in fact actually make a great couple. Still friends though.
"I just had the wrong set of friends at the time..."
I just had the wrong set of friends at the time, they picked on him tirelessly even though he was damn near perfect. Years later one of those friends ended up with him after I moved away.
"It may sound weird..."
It may sound weird, but when I was 13 I had a best friend. As a teenager not knowing what love is. If he had not been super depressed, barely capable of keeping up a friendship and not killed himself when he was 14, we would have been perfect for each other after puberty. We loved each other so much, we never tried anything, because we knew that we would mess it up for later. I hope he rests peacefully, and he was the first male to ever feel and show real love to me until I was 21.
"In the long run..."
My best friend and I in high school were so in sync that we probably would've made a great couple. We even both came to this realization so we sat down one day and talked about it.
In the long run we decided the timing wasn't right at that point in time, and to just stay friends to keep our friendship in tact. Still see her 2-3 times a year, she's a wonderful person and even has a boyfriend now! I'm not as far along unfortunately.
"I am pretty sure he's married."
Aww, that guy was named Justin. We got along so well. We had everything in common and the chemistry was crazy sexy. But we never lived in the same place at the same time and most of the time one of us was in a relationship. And that just was the case, always. So it never worked out. Once we got a bit older I finally said we shouldn't talk anymore, because it always gets in to flirtation and that's not appropriate if we're gonna be dating other people.
He's not a lost love or anything though, just a fond memory I guess? I am pretty sure he's married. I am, and who I'm with now is much more than just us being a great couple.
"I soon realised..."
Met her during my school time. She was perfect. Beautiful, smart, intelligent, funny. We spent time together just talking for hours, and telling each other random stories, sitting on a the compound wall of her house.
I soon realised though that I was not good enough for her as while she was amazing in every aspect, I had absolutely zero skill, zero hobbies, I didn't even look that impressive physically. So, come university, I decided to improve myself and become somewhat worthy of her. So, I started reading, going to the gym, socialising more, etc. Then life happened. One of thing led to another, as I completed my grad and went on to do my post grad and then got a job, i had to change several countries.
2 years back, when I went back to my country I happened to bump into her and found out that she had married someone now. They both write stuff for magazines and newspapers. Blogs and what not. She was happy that I made it so far in life. I never found the guts to tell her that it all started with trying to be even with her.
She seems happy with her life and I am happy for her, but who knows, how everything would have turned out, if I would have spent more time with her in the past, rather than go off in a trip for self improvement.
Teachers Describe The One Student That They'll Never Forget | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
"In my experience..."
We both met way back in middle school and throughout the years we've had great chemistry but she always seemed to be dating someone. Freshman year of college we were both single and she asked if i wanted to try dating but I'd moved to a different city and I didn't want to try long distance. Since then I know we've both had feelings for each other but the timing never seemed to match up right. In my experience, the most important thing about starting a relationship with someone you already care about really comes down to timing.
"I met a girl..."
I met a girl who is highly energetic, extroverted, pretty, and very fun. I'd known her for years beforehand but only actually got to get to know her then. The only reason I didn't ask her out was because she was dating a close friend of mine at the time... which is how I got to know her in the first place.
They broke up, I still liked her, and then she started dating my best friend. They're actually super cute and happy together so I'm happy for them (if not a little jealous).
"At the very least..."
I can think of a few.
- She was already married. We were good friends while our lives intersected, but haven't kept in touch since I moved for work.
- She was dating/engaged to her now-husband while I knew her. We were good friends while our lives intersected, but haven't kept in touch since we went our separate ways.
- She's dating the person I expect she'll marry. At the very least, she'll still be together with him by the time I move away. We're polite acquaintances but otherwise try to stay out of each other's way. This was the one that really hurt because I developed feelings before I found out she was unavailable. With the others I never hoped for anything more than friendship; not so here.
"I was broke..."
I was broke at the time and she moved on to someone else. They live together and have been in a relationship for 5 years. I'm in a long distance relationship with someone else now.
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.