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Social Butterflies Share Their Quickest Ways To Stop Awkward Silences

Social Butterflies Share Their Quickest Ways To Stop Awkward Silences

Social Butterflies Share Their Quickest Ways To Stop Awkward Silences

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Some say silence is golden. Any parent of a young child will tell you silence usually means something is terribly wrong and you're about to spend 45 minutes cleaning it or at least $125 fixing it. The terminally she among us will tell you silence is so. incredibly. awkward.

Much awkward. Very cringe. So you guys can imagine our faces when we stumbled across this magical gem of a reddit thread:

What is your go-to question to kill awkward silence?

Yes, social butterflies! Teach us your fluttery ways! Turns out those social butterflies among us are just as weird as the rest of us, they're just more willing to share the weird aloud. Need proof? Check out the responses they came up with!

If You're Ever In Myanmar

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Soooo... think we'll go metric?

(DISCLAIMER: this really only works in the US, Myanmar, and Liberia)

... And To Scorpions, Lobsters Are Mermaids...

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I think it was an old shower though but "Do you ever wonder if crabs think fish are flying?"

It ENDS?!?

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"When does Ford Truck Month end"

It's Always Something

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Have you heard about Pluto?

Great, Now We Want BBQ

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"Are you familiar with Murphy's Law?"

"Yeah" or "No"

"It states that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. Are you familiar with Cole's Law?"

"No...?"

"It's thinly chopped cabbage."

Thankfully Someone Actually Answered This One On Reddit

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Do you think you could taxidermy a jellyfish?

Actually This Is Brilliant

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"What's the worst movie (or book) you've seen/read?"

Everybody likes gushing about their favorites, but it's even MORE fun to bash something you really hate! Plus, their reasons for hating it are so diverse, as opposed to why someone loves something, which are more or less the same. Kinda like the first line in Anna Karenina: Happy families are all alike, but every unhappy family is unhappy in their own way.

What's Up, Doc?

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"Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he dressed up like a girl bunny?"

Awkward, Uh, Finds A Way

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I'm a phlebotomist for a plasma donation center. I always ask how donors' weekends went. One day I asked a young girl and she said, "terrible". Out of habit I accidentally asked why, and she told me that she had caught her boyfriend of 5 years was cheating on her on their anniversary. I didn't know what to say so after what felt like a minute I asked, "so have you seen the new Jurassic Park"? Ever since then that had been my go to.

Edit: she had not seen it.

T.E.D. Talk

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I usually run through popular AskReddit questions. My go-to is "If you had to give a TED talk in 5 minutes what topic would you pick and why?" Usually brings out a topic they are passionate about and easy to keep conversation going

Save The Tacos!

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If you had [random around of money] and had to spend every single penny by tomorrow, what would you buy?

*The best part of this one was that someone responded with the evilest thing we can think of: *

I would buy all the taco shells at Taco Bell and then stand there listening to customers freak out about Taco Bell not having any taco shells

To The Winchester, Obviously

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If zombies attacked right now what's our plan?

Oh, The Drama

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In high school drama class a buddy forgot his line and replied awkwardly with, How about them Jays? Has been go to question ever since

If They're Not Indiana Jones Fans, This Is Just Going To Increase The Awkward

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I start chanting "kali ma shakti de!" While I slowly make a gripping motion with my hand moving closer to their chest where their heart would be.

A Super Conversation Starter

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My go to question has always been "Who's your favorite super hero?" I get all kinds of answers, and people tend to respond fairly well with it. So one day I get a new manager in my building. Guy is pure business. I hadn't had much interaction with him but I had heard he was a real hard ass from the get go. A couple days later I get on an elevator and he's in there. We say a few things back and forth when I do it without realizing. I had gotten comfortable with the conversation and I asked him before I could stop myself. Dude gets the biggest grin on his face before saying "I gotta go with my man, The Dark Knight!"

Whenever someone says their hero I ask how they feel about one of the DC/Marvel counterparts. So I ask how he feels about Iron Man. He tells me that iron man is ok, but he has always been a DC fan. I tell him that's cool and leave it at that. Next day, he finds me in my office and starts showing me pictures on his phone of his batman collection. Comics, movies, action figures, statutes, posters, a couple of lunch boxes, a model car. All kinds of shit. Dude f*cking LOVES batman. Turns into one of the best work friendships I ever had. We talked about comics and whatever new movies were coming out on a near daily basis. Eventually he left, and I haven't heard from him in a couple years, but I know he's out there. Somewhere. Fighting evil. And paperwork. And probably scaring people with how intense he is, because they don't know how his face lights up when he talks about Batman. My girlfriend would probably be jealous of our friendship.

On or In?

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If one were to remove the cushions where people? sit on a couch, proceed to lay on the cushionless couch, and finally put the cushions over themselves; would they be IN the couch? A lot of people say that they are still ON the couch - which is bullsh*t when you look at the low amount of effort it takes to be "in" bed.

Thanks, Chandler

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I think Chandler Bing had the best.

" So... Ebola... That's gotta suck eh?"

Silence Is Normal

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Okay, my job and personal life VERY often put me in "awkward silence" situations. Not to mention I hate small talk and avoid it whenever possible.

Here's my approach.

First, two things:

1. Silence is normal and usually goes unnoticed.

2. Truly connecting with someone requires some vulnerability and curiosity.

For me, silence becomes awkward if there is some pressure or expectation for what the conversation SHOULD be. Maybe it's a first date and I want to connect with the dude or maybe I'm grabbing lunch with my boss and I want to have a good rapport with her.

So when I realize I'm feeling anxious, I take a deep, relaxing breath and exhale all the tension out (yeah, right in front of them!). Taking a deep breath helps calm my nerves. I also remind myself that silence is normal and it's not my job to carry the conversation.

I've noticed that by relaxing my nerves, I can help shift my own energy and hopefully signal to the other person that they should also feel at ease...

Once I relax and feel less pressure, conversation can come more naturally.

I might make a basic observation or ask a basic question ("so how long have you lived here") and listen carefully to the answer. Human beings are fascinating and complex. If you pay attention and care about what someone has to say, you are one step closer to genuinely connecting with them. Less small talk, more real talk. Be curious about who they are and what it's like to live life through their eyes.

Sometimes, the silence might give your companion an opportunity to speak up. Some folks need time to process and open up and, for them, a bit of silence is very welcome. Again, you aren't the only person in the conversation.

I'm an impatient and impulsive person who cares a lot about harmony. So I recognize that my discomfort with silence is my own weird thing. I try to take it as an opportunity to practice patience and listening.

Poop Wars

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"After taking a dump, do you wipe standing up or sitting down?"

This has caused large debate among friend groups and most can't believe some do it any way but theirs...

Then Again... Maybe Don't Ask Anything.

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Why would I want to kill something as precious as silence.

H/T: Reddit

Things People Secretly Love But Would Never Admit To In Public

Reddit user sweet_chick283 asked: 'What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?;

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

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