Realistically measuring risk v. reward has never been my strong suit, fam. Particularly when it comes to relationships, and I don't just mean the romantic ones.
Ya girl's been known to go out on some pretty sketchy limbs for her friends, partners, family and work relationships - but even I measured my risk more carefully than some of the folks we're about to meet. That's saying a lot cause I once let a boss talk me into creating, maintaining, and doing the workload of two entirely fake people to make the company look bigger.
No there was no raise. Literally NO reward to this highly illegal (it was in the medical field, y'all!) incredibly immoral and straight up exhausting risk.
Reddit asked:
What's the most high risk, low reward thing you've ever done?
Here is where I'm going to caution you ... people do some absolutely bonkers stuff. Don't try any of this at home. It's probably not going to end well.
Curiosity Could Have Killed This Cat
GiphyI once followed a young homeless man I just met because he wanted to show me where he was staying. It was nighttime and he invited me down into a dip in the trees. We walked through a dark section of forest then he showed me some rocks and small caves with a couple beds set up. Then we left. I literally followed a stranger into the dark woods because...curiosity?
The Pictures Sucked Anyway
I once climbed an old truss bridge to get some neat pictures of myself. I climbed under it and sat on the beams beneath the bridge. I climbed the the very top. I hung off the edge of the bridge above several rocks.
Once I got done and showed the pictures to my friends they said they sucked.
Degrees
Taking a year in a program I wasn't interested in to try and get a girl, who turned me down instantly.
I wasn't horny, I was lonely. We were good friends prior, not so much afterwards as sh!t got awkward; it was also my second year, so I did get a useless degree I never claimed for my trouble (social science.) So there's the reward, I guess.
Don't feel too bad. I had a friend turn down a full scholarship to Johns Hopkins because she met a guy at a local college when we were taking classes there to finish up high school. She decided to go to that college instead. Her and the boy she changed her life for didn't make it through the summer. 17 years after she graduated high school, she's finally, this year, graduated med school.
- gtg930r
Lost In The Towers
Climbing up a water tower when drunk to find a friend. Turns out said friend was not even lost. He was yelling at me from the base of the tower.
Oh, that reminds me.
We got the bright idea to go rappelling off a cell tower at like 3 in the morning. This was not a spur of the moment decision, it was planned. After we were done we were pulling the rope down and I guess we had left a knot in it? Rope gets stuck between the towers vertical and horizontal supports about 15' out from the ladder we were using.
Like it was stuck. At least 50' off the ground.
I wasn't about to leave my $100 climbing rope hanging there so I climbed up... No rope... and walked out on this 15' crossmember balancing with nothing to hold on to. Made it to the vertical support where the rope was caught, kicked it down, and then had to make it back to the ladder.
Obviously I succeeded but about 30 minutes after I got down I had the worst stress headache I've ever had in my life. I was puking my head hurt so bad.
I think I was 16 or 17 at the time. It wasn't even that fun... a rock face is much better than just hanging in empty space and sliding down the rope.
Crocs & Hippos
GiphyI swam in the Zambezi when I was drunk on a tiger fishing trip. Still can't believe I was that stupid. For those that don't know, its infested with hippos and crocs, known for taking people.
Smoking
I started smoking. Like wtf is this stupid sht?
It has literally no benefit; it just makes me uncomfortable when I don't do it and when I do it as well.
That's the thought that got me through quitting smoking: literally the only thing that it did was temporarily make me stop craving it. Other drugs at least offer a reason for people to take them, like they feel good or help you relax. Not cigarettes, though. You're always in one of three states - smoking, feeling normal for half an hour, or wishing you were smoking. What a way to live, huh?
It's such a stupid damned habit, and so hard to quit. But really, think about that on your next smoke break: is this making you feel good, or just temporarily relaxed because the craving has stopped for a few minutes? Getting in that mindset helped me a lot when I stopped.
Get To Zero
Once my mom started counting backwards from 5, and I started counting down from 3. She stared daggers at me and asked what I was counting to. I said that's how much time she has to stop pretending she was going to do shit when she got to 0.
My spirit lives on to warn others of my misfortune.
Near-Swan-Dive-Experience
Whilst building a house, the second floor had an I beam that extended our into nowhere that needed to be painted with rust protection paint. The floor had not been installed yet and the joists were still going in. To save time, I shimmied out to the end of the beam and started painting. Every bit of wind made the whole thing sway. Just my movements made it wiggle a fair bit. Nearly took a six meter swan dive to a concrete floor about 12 times. I could have painted it after the floor was in but that would mean laying down drop sheets and lots of messing around. Should have waited. Was a totally stupid thing to do.
Paper Signs
My friends and I used to target and steal those signs that said "If you are caught stealing you will be prosecuted". Many illegal things were done and many hundreds of thousands of dollars of stuff was ignored to steal increasingly difficult to obtain paper signs.
- Churonna
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "
" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
"People of Reddit, what is the dumbest reason your (ex) partner gave for cheating?"
So Much For "Till Death do Us Part".
"'You are dying! Do you really want me alone when you are dead?'"
"I was fighting cancer."
"He also told me that I was disgusting and he felt gross touching me."
"Luckily, both types of cancer are out of my life."- Mr_BigDuck
You Could Have At Least Left A Message!
"'You didn't answer your phone, was I supposed to spend Saturday night alone?'"
"I was at work, and so were you, we worked together you f*cking moron."- sixesand7s
Love At First Sight... Or Not
"She met someone that she immediately saw herself marrying."
"A month after we broke up she moved across the country, got married, called me to tell me she made a mistake, got divorced, moved back home, got pregnant and then got married again."- Zarrush
Gonna Have To Do Better Than That...
"Her response once I caught her was that she was flat-out horny."
"But after I said that’s why you have a boyfriend it was kinda funny how she went dead silent."- PuzzleheadedFarm7417
Um...
"He said that he cheated on me because I wanted to have too much sex."
"More than 5 years later I still can't find any logic in that."- Etrixie
So Much For Commitment
"'It's not like we're married'."
"Apparently I can't expect respect from someone who goes from calling me 'love of my life' to blowing her high school shag toy when he comes back to town."- FortGeek
Cartoons Button GIF by NickelodeonGiphyIt Never Is...
“'It’s not what you think it is!'”
"After I walked in on them making out."
"While she was on his lap."
"Both without shirts."- MrSirChris
Two Whole Weeks...
"I couldn't have sex for two weeks so I could recover from surgery so she thought it wasn't cheating'."- Henchforhire
What The Actual...
"My ex-girlfriend said I forgot you were alive."
"For details, I wasn't in the military, I was at university."- Ali8ly
scared star wars GIF by Hyper RPGGiphyThat Only Makes It Worse
"It was his kid's mom so it didn't count."- kittenxx96
"In Sickness And In Health"...Oops!
“'I have needs for sex you aren’t helping me with!'"
"Said to me the day I get home from spending a week in the hospital with kidney failure (lupus)."- EndlesslyUnfinished
We Can Only "Open" Our Hearts So Much...
"Well, I know this guy that was convinced he was in an open relationship, except he forgot to let his girlfriend know.."
"She found out 7 years into the 'open relationship'."
"With multiple women, in 4 continents."
"Oh he also had a book where he'd categorize them."- ProfessionalSpite866
Episode 2 Player GIF by ABC NetworkGiphySanta? SANTA?!?!
"My serial cheater ex-once told me while in a fit of tears."
"'I can't stop cheating, I just have so many issues, my mom lied about Santa when I was a kid and it really f*cked me up'."
"'I don't think I can trust people because of it so I cheat'."- pastelflorist
No One Likes To Be Treated Like A Piece Of Meat...
“It’s like if you order the same subway sandwich for a year, eventually you’re gonna get bored of it."
"But you try another flavor and when you go back to the original one it’s better than you remembered'.”
"Felt not so good being compared to a 6 inch BLT tbh."- NucularOrchid
Oh, nothing, except commitment and fidelity...
"'She was prettier than you, what did you expect?'"
"We were engaged and had been dating for 3 years."- kathjoy
No doubt all these poor people are grateful for dodging the bullet that staying with these people would have been.
Even if it can't quite make up for the pain and embarrassment these experiences brought them.
Redditor InsertBurnsHere wanted to discuss the world's most unresolved issues, so they asked:
"What is the biggest unsolved mystery in human history?"
The mysteries that haunt me are all murder stories.
When will we find the killers?!
The Absconded
Bank Robbery Heist GIF by ADWEEKGiphy"Who was behind the Gardner Museum heist? Hundreds of millions of dollars worth of art was taken, and we have little to no clue who was behind it, and none of the paintings have surfaced."
Stillwater215
The Linear Truth
"In 1893, British archaeologist Sir Arthur Evans purchased some ancient stones with mysterious inscriptions on them at a flea market in Athens. On a later trip to the excavations at Knossos on the island of Crete, he recognized one of the symbols from his stones and began a study of the engraved tablets being uncovered at various sites on the island."
"He discovered two different systems, which he called Linear A and Linear B. While Linear B was deciphered in the early 1950s (it turned out to represent an early form of Greek), Linear A, above, has still not been deciphered."
"There is an entire culture of information that predates much of our history, a window into ancient humanity that is simply locked away from us because we don't know how to read it."
Atamask
Exact Dates
"An active one in the archaeology world is the exact time frame of when humans made it to the Americas. The date keeps getting pushed back with more controversial discoveries that then just turn to evidence as they pile up. It’s a fascinating story to see unfold."
DocAuch22
"Yeah I like this one too, I think many of the traces of early settlement are likely submerged. Sea levels were much lower during the ice age and the majority of human settlements are along the coasts so a huge piece of our history is probably lying on the seafloor completely undisturbed and possibly well preserved."
who519
Monarchs
"So the Monarch Butterfly migrates to Mexico and back every year. During the year there are a full 4 generations of butterflies that live and die during the journey. Upon returning back from Mexico, the butterfly manages to find the same trees it's relative started out at despite never having been there."
MasonS98
Dark Energy
Loop Space GIF by xponentialdesignGiphy"We like to think we understand the universe and that physics is a well grounded discipline, and in some ways it is. However we have no idea what dark matter or dark energy is and yet we think it makes up 27% and 68% of the universe respectively."
Ok_Passenger_4202
The Universe is vast and scary, like the sea.
The End
Kimmy Schmidt Netflix GIF by Unbreakable Kimmy SchmidtGiphy"The final words of the emperor Titus were 'I have but one regret'. We don't know and never will what that regret was."
Ayearinbooks
5000 BCE
"That most of human history is undocumented and we will never know our entire history as a species. We didn’t start recording our history until 5000 BCE, we do know we shifted to agrarian societies around 10,000 BCE but beyond that we have no idea what we were like as a species, we will never know the undocumented parts of our history that spans 10s of thousands of years."
"We are often baffled by the technological progress of our ancient ancestors, like those in SE Asia who must have been masters of the sea to have colonized the variety of islands there and sailed vast stretches of ocean to land on Australia and New Zealand."
"What is ironic is we currently have an immense amount of information about our world today and the limited documented history of our early days as a species but that is only a small fraction of our entire history."
patlaff91
How Big?
"I don't know about 'biggest,' but I always thought the Voynich Manuscript was very interesting. A huge book written in an unknown language or cipher that has never been translated or decoded with diagrams of plant species that don't exist. Lots of theories surrounding it, but no definitive answers as to the origins or the content."
AbortionSurvivor777
Who made it?
"Not sure if it's THE biggest mystery. But the Antikythera mechanism is pretty wild."
"Dated to at least 60BC, possibly as old as 200BC, it's as complex as clockworks that didn't show up until the 1400s, over a millennium later!"
"It's just such a strange technological anomaly. Who made it? What else did they make and why haven't we found more stuff as advanced?"
SmokedMessias
Magic Tins
Video Recycle GIF by Jenny LorenzoGiphy"Why did we all just globally decide that those blue Dutch cookie tins hold sewing supplies?"
MysteriousStaff3388
"They’re large enough to hold sewing scissors, along with other notions, and made of metal so that the scissors and needles can’t poke through them. Or at least that’s the consensus r/sewing seems to have come to."
butter_milk
My grandma had like 20 of those tins.
Good times.
Do you have any mysteries to add? Let us know in the comments below.
Redditor onlyusemefeets wanted to hear about the worst of everyone's family, so they asked:
"When did you find out that someone in your family is evil?"
The Reddit community rose to the occasion to shed some light on their family skeletons.
Money Issues
Wild West Fighting GIF by Buyout FootageGiphy"When they ripped apart 3 generations of my family almost immediately after my dad died for a measly $37,000. He's a millionaire. That kinda money is pocket change to him."
Good Lord
"When my 11 year old cousin got cancer."
"Her mom and boyfriend were shooting up her pain medicine. My cousin was in so much pain, she told her Doctors. Thats when the doctors stopped giving her mom a prescription and the nurses dispensed her pain meds at the hospital. Unfortunately they could not keep track of medication while at home so they reported it."
"CPS removed her. She died shortly after in foster care. Parents were never charged."
dead-parrots
Death
"When my dad died of covid my Aunt tried to say she was entitled to some stuff of his since it belonged in the family. She even called a lawyer on us and it was big deal and my mom didn't need to deal with that trying to raise 3 kids on her own so f**k her. She still bothers us about stuff and all it is like plates and some pictures and some other things."
"Sunken Cost Fallacy"
"My brother's addiction has led to him spinning some ridiculous stories. I'm not sure if he is very convincing or if my father chooses to believe him because of some 'sunken cost fallacy,' or he genuinely refuses to give up. But my brother has told lies and stories about me and my siblings to the point that he's the only child who talks to my father anymore. He convinced my father that I forced him to do drugs."
"But I knew my brother was evil when scared away my sister with physical violence. Last month, he went missing for a weeks only to turn up after flipping his car high on pills. My father doesn't know it yet, but my mother is planning on leaving him because my father chooses my brother over her. No one can convince my father that he's enabling. No one can convince my brother to stop. Hard drugs really destroy entire families."
sleepypanda59
A New Family
Frustrated Skip Bayless GIFGiphy"When he purposely excluded his 4 year old son (from a previous relationship) from his wedding to his new spouse, deleted all photos of his son from his social media, and legally signed away all parental rights. He has since had 2 more kids with said new spouse."
FeminaCanadiana
How can parents act that way?
Failure...
"I don't know about evil, but my dad got remarried and has a kid and stepson with his new spouse. All of that would be fine if he didn't pretend that none of us (offspring from first marriage) exist so he can pretend this family is the first family and we never happened."
"Once this realization hit me, I stopped contacting him, and once I stopped putting in the effort, everything else dissipated. We haven't spoken at all. He does not care in the least. I honestly believe that he wishes we never even existed. He is a failure as a father and as a man."
Raindrops_On-Roses
Oh Brother
"When my husband's brother (1 of 5 siblings) said he couldn't make it to our house to plan their mother's funeral because he had to work. Meanwhile we found out he wasn't working because we caught him on ring doorbell entering the moms house to rifle through it while the rest of us were planning the funeral at my house."
Legitimate_Energy257
The End
"When my ex said 'you've been a godsend, I want a divorce.' I had taken time off from work to take care of her parents. She told me this right before her dad died, and she inherited. She found a boyfriend while I was with her parents. She got the house by declaring I had abandoned it. I was with her parents."
rollercoaster_5
Evil
Season 5 Nickelodeon GIFGiphy"When my dad tried to throw my 6 month old sister when he was drunk. That man is a monster in disguise"
iinattanii
So many people really need to be screened for their abilities to raise kids.