Much like a housecleaning effort on Facebook, there comes a time when we are forced to make the tough decision to end friendships and/or relationships.
Some people can weigh us down and prevent us from being the best version of ourselves, or others can be so toxic, that it's better to just cut our losses.
It's not always an easy decision to make, but downsizing can be the best-case scenario.
Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor NecessaryJacket4051 asked:
"People who have cut other people out, what was the final nail in the coffin?"
Friends can gradually grow distant, or be completely annoying.
Too Needy
"A friend I had in high-school and college became incredibly needy. We went to two different universities and lived in two different states and made a deal to call each other every week to catch up. They started to make poor decisions in their post-grad life which became an endless 'am I the a**hole' conversation where I became their confessor and forgiver but was never able to share anything about my own life."
"Things became bad for me, but despite me being there constantly for them, they couldn't return the favor. It came to a point where I got sick, missed one of their phone calls and they started to call me incessantly while I slept. The kind where they call you 20 times in a 5 minute span and leave messages from caring and concern 'hey where are you?' to 'I hate you, you don't care about me!' crap."
"Anywho, I was given the ultimatum of either never speaking to them again or calling them back and begging for forgiveness. Easiest choice I ever made. 8+ year friendship gone in an instant and I never once felt bad or looked back."
– Feralbritches1
The Guilt Trip
"My first year of university I found out my mum had a lesion in the centre of her brain and the amount of fluid and pressure on her skull required immediate treatment. She was in hospital recieving treatment for weeks while I tried to navigate my studies and living away from home for the first time. I was a mess of anxiety and stress for months."
"During this time one of my very close friends continually got angry at me for not giving her enough attention despite never contacting me to check on my mothers situation or how I was coping. But I was expected to check in on her constantly and initiate all contact. I just deleted her number and unfriended her."
– riarum
The Reluctant Chauffeur
"A friend asked me to drive him to a party."
"The party was at least a 4 hour drive (two states away), he couldn't pay for gasoline, and the hosts might give me a place to sleep. I was a college student who could barely afford gas to get to school."
"Everything about this sounded shady and one-sided, especially when he blew-off my questions. We didn't talk after that phone call - and nothing of value was lost."
"This happened in the early 90s, so no modern trip planning was available. No GPS, no Mapquest, and cellphones were expensive to use."
– siege72a
Dealing with inheritance can sure bring out the ugly in people.
Greedy Relatives
"When my relatives on my mom’s side of the family not only took every possession she owned except some of her clothes, but also wanted to take my mom’s social security benefits after she passed away from cancer."
"My youngest sibling was only 12/13 when she passed so those benefits would help my dad raise my sibling. My relatives didn’t think my dad was a good father ever since my mom and dad divorced (mom cheated on my dad)."
"My uncle threatened to come over to our state to kick my husband’s a** and call the cops on me when I managed to get my mom’s SS funds transferred to my dad."
"Edit to add: To this day, I don’t know where my mom is buried as her family took her ashes and didn’t tell either me, my siblings, or my dad the location of her gravesite."
– Soggy_Willingness_65
Annoying Half-Sisters
"After our father died, my two half sisters started harassing my one full sister about the inheritance. She was the one left in charge of it all, but was taking his death the hardest and having trouble getting through the paperwork."
"They were ruthless and made her feel horrible when she was already struggling. At the same time they would turn around and be totally nice to me because I’m the baby of the family and (despite me also being an adult at the time) they didn’t want to 'get me involved.'"
"Once the estate was settled I cut them out of my life completely. I’ll never forgive them for how they treated my other sister, and over money. Our father would be ashamed."
– TonyDanzer
When your spouse isn't appreciated by family, who should you be most loyal to?
These Redditors had to make a decision that was actually very easy.
Toxic Family
"My mother, brother, and sister are all incredibly toxic people, but I never cut them out 'because they're family.' Then the sh*t really hit the fan when I was getting married. At our Jack&Jill party, my mother was taking tons of pictures (as expected), but they were of me and my brother, me and my dad, just me, me my brother and my dad, etc. She didn't want my wife in any of them. I spoke up and said that my future wife should be in these pictures. It's her wedding day too. My wife, who was understandably upset, walked away from the weird photography session."
"My wife and I decide to go to the backyard area and hang out with her cousin and step brother. My cousin and his gf join us. Things get more fun, we're joking around, and having a good time. Then my mom and brother come outside extremely drunk (it was like 3 PM). My mom starts by taking more pictures without the bride in them, so I speak up again. My mom shushes me and slaps the back of my head. My wife then says my mom can enjoy her little family reunion photos and then goes back inside. I follow to make sure she's okay."
"I get in conversation with her, her mom, aunt, and other family members of hers. We calm down and move on. We talk about getting ice cream at a place down the street. I go back outside to ask people if they want to get ice cream (as most weren't causing issues, just my mom and brother). Before I say anything, my very drunk brother starts shouting 'f*** your wife, f*** her family, and began charging at me, but was caught by my dad and cousin who held him back. He was of course kicked out. My mom left with him in tears. My dad (my parents are divorced and don't associate with each other at all) apologized to everyone and left out of embarrassment."
"Wedding day comes. My brother is no longer my best man and is not invited. My sister is here from the other side of the country. The ceremony goes perfectly. My sister refuses to attend the pictures being taken of family and wedding party outside. During the reception, my wife, friends, some of my wife's family, and I are busy dancing on the dance floor. We notice my sister crying and walking around from table to table. We ignore it; as we expected her to try something dumb at our wedding. We find out from someone that my sister was trash talking my wife in the bathroom. We don't want to deal with drama on our big day, so we have the person in charge of the wedding hall/supervising the reception staff talk to her about her behavior (she told us we could during the wedding planning process). My sister freaks out and acts all offended. She and my mom then stage a walk out protest of our wedding, taking a large majority of my aunts, uncles, and cousins with them (not all thankfully)."
"To this day (it's been 4 years), I haven't spoken to anyone who walked out."
– Davidt93
Ruined Wedding
"I got married like 2 Weeks ago and had something similar happens except I was in the position of you're wife. I had never expected to have to hide in a room and cry on my wedding day. Truly some horrible people."
– jellybeansonmygrass
The Father Who Wasn't
"I cut my biological dad completely off because he just didn't try."
"When I was younger I cut contact with him because he didn't believe me when I told him his new wife was abusing me and my sister. I petitioned for my parents' custody agreement to be changed and everything to protect me and my sister. We didn't see him again as minors."
"When we were adults he reached out to me and expressed regret at not being there for us and wanted to reconnect. We (me, sister, and him) met for dinner twice and then he just started not showing up. I stopped telling my sister we were even supposed to be meeting him because she was so disappointed that he flaked and just took her out myself, knowing he wouldn't show. I told him after like the fifth time that he clearly didn't care enough to even let us know he wasn't gonna show so I wanted nothing to do with him. He replied in some apologetic way but I left him on read."
"Fast forward about six years. I got married and my husband has a lot of regrets about his estranged father dying before they could reconnect, so I reached out to my bio dad again. No plans were made to meet but we did chat occasionally. Until it became just me initiating conversation and him not ever reaching out to me first. I stopped sending him messages about five months after I got married. I've been married three years and haven't heard from him even once since."
"I guess TLDR the final straw was me realizing I was always gonna put more effort in for a relationship that I didn't need."
– Odd-Astronaut-92
No Time For Nastiness
"I finally cut my father's wife out of our lives after my wife and I had our first child. I was able to put up with her nastiness growing up, but the second I saw that nastiness get directed towards my kid, it was over."
"My decision was further solidified when I found out she texted me from my Dad's phone, pretending to be him and unbeknownst to him, saying we should invite her to my kid's birthday party and make amends. She also made a giant scene a few years later at my Grandmother's wake."
– MarcableFluke
Just because you're bound by blood, it doesn't mean families always have your back.
Spreading Lies
"She went around to myself (transman, closeted at the time), her brother, her uncle, and several friends of ours, accusing several of us of sexually abusing her. It caused several violent interactions and broken friendships, until people finally got to talking and realized she was giving the same lists of people minus whoever she was making the accusations to at the time."
– Astrises
Despicable Sister
"My sister tried to pull that same sh*t with my family and I disowned her over it. I noticed the pattern when I talked to people about how those accusations came about and discovered she was always upset over some trivial bullsh*t either when she said it or immediately before she said it."
"My mom doesn't understand why it's still 'such a big deal' to me, she 'apologized' for it (to some of the people she told the lies to, not to anyone she told the lies about). She never accused me that I know of, but it wouldn't surprise me to hear that she did."
– [deleted]
The Final Straw
"My parents are divorced and my brother and I were raised by our mom. My dad paid $100 month, for 2 kids, in child support until we were adults. Mom let him pay that little."
"My brother died in an automobile accident at age of 20. Everyone came to the funeral, including my dad. At the funeral, I overheard him talking to the other parents of the kids who were in the accident. My brother was the only fatality. He was about talking getting lawyers and who he was going to sue. Totally inappropriate behavior at a funeral considering he made very little effort at being a father while we were growing up."
"He had a life insurance policy on my brother and myself. He cashed it in and volunteered to take care of my brother's grave stone. 9 months had passed and he still hadn't done anything except place the order. My mom ended up driving 5 hours to get the grave marker and paid for it."
"But, the final straw for me was when he asked my mom for a refund on the child support that he paid on my brother over his life. My mom paid him which she should never had done."
"He died last year from COVID. I have no regrets that he never met his only 2 biological grandchildren. For all I know, he would have taken life insurance policies out on them hoping to cash in."
"I went to the graveside funeral, left and drove 5 hours to get back home. I'm still blown away by all the wonderful things people were saying about him at the funeral. I didn't know that person."
– RatHumped
For some, cutting someone out of their lives is not a difficult decision to make when it's your mental well-being that is suffering.
Forget about keeping up with appearances. Looking out for yourself and your loved ones by permanently disassociating from toxic people is a no-brainer.
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For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
tsunami GIF
Giphy
"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
Scared The Launch GIF by CTV
Giphy
"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
Who Are You Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
Giphy
"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
Giphy
What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
Giphy
Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
Giphy
Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
Giphy
Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...