The police pull up and immediately people tense. They start trying to act "normal," as if what they were doing is somehow a crime.

The police must roll their eyes at us doing these "normal" tasks all the time. And they know full well it's because they're right there.

u/Snnackss asked:

Police officers of Reddit, what's the funniest thing someone has done because they were nervous around you?

Here were some of those answers.

Always A Bigger Fish

My dad and I both work for the same PD, this is his story not mine. The shift before he had a guy detained for misdemeanor warrants or something. Some junkie comes walking down the road, sees the flashing lights and a cop next to a open back door. He empties his pockets dumping a pipe, needles, and 5 grams of drugs on the hood of his patrol car. He then spreads his legs and puts his hands on the car. My dad was shocked, let the other guy in the back go and took in the guy who just handed over his drugs. Apparently not sleeping for 3 days makes you paranoid.


Broken Time

May be too late, but one day I was headed to my station at the end of shift (meaning I stare straight ahead and avoid getting any paperwork to make me stay late) I happened to be behind the same car for maybe 2 miles on the same road. We're sitting at a red light and out of nowhere this dude runs it.

Everyone at the intersection looks at me so of course I stop the dude. Make contact and he can barely hand me his license he's shaking so bad from being nervous. Ask why he's so scared and he says he saw me behind him and he's on diversion... For running a red light. Also ends up having weed in the car.


Siphoning Gas

Partner and I pull up at Taco Bell to grab lunch. Notice this dude near a work truck looking kinda shifty, but he's standing next to another dude and both are wearing the same company logo.

I pretty much ignore him, however I realized I left my wallet back in the car. When I turn around the dude is nowhere to be seen. He hasn't bolted, parking lot is too big and we would see him.

At this point it has piqued my interest and I walk towards the truck, all the while the other dude is just standing there shaking his head. Turns out this idiot is on his stomach trying to crawl under the truck because he thinks we are there for him.

Bewildered, we detain the dude for a moment. We quickly find out he has no outstanding warrants, but instead was guilty of something stupidly minor. He used some of the gas from one of the company cars for his personal vehicle and he thought his boss knew.

Dude ruined his work shirt, got called an idiot by his coworker, and didn't even get away- for no reason.


Flagrant Flatulence

Not a police officer but...

My dad was driving (with Me, my brother, my mum and the cat in the carrier) to our new house but he didn't put his seatbelt on because he was stressed or something. Then a police car drove over and asked dad 'guess why I pulled you over'. My dad was really nervous and farted loudly, turned around, and blamed it on the cat. The police officer was hysterical and told him to put his seatbelt on and laughed hysterically while driving off.


Drying My Hair

My neighbor's kid used to put on mirrored sunglasses, sit in the driver's seat of their parked SUV, and point a hair dryer out the window so he could keep score of how many speeders slammed on the brakes.


Drivers Ain't Got Nothing

Not a cop but I used to work as an EMT. Drivers who were speeding would sometimes slow down when they would see my ambulance like I could pull them over or something. Even with no lights or sirens on. I always thought that was hilarious.

Also, when running lights and sirens, instead of moving over and letting my ambulance pass, some idiots would slam on their brakes before moving to the side when I came up behind them, forcing me to slam on my brakes. Never do this.


Skiing Skills

One time my brother, my dad, and I tied a water skiing rope to the back of our car during some heavy snowfall. We then towed my brother behind the car through the neighborhood on his skis sometime around midnight (so there'd be no traffic, and what few people were out were laughing their butts off) with me in the back seat acting as spotter in case he fell down or stopped.

And one point while driving up a hill we see police lights up ahead, at which point my brother drops the rope and uses his remaining momentum to go down an alley that's going downhill. Thing is that alley was FILLED with crazy potholes, so there's my brother putting his ski racing skills to use avoiding potholes instead of gates.


Teenage Boy Stuff

Not a cop, but I like to go out at night and basically mess around and do stupid stuff like put on a light up helmet and have friends push me around in a shopping cart. Teenage boy stuff. I don't drink or smoke or vape or anything but I've always been worried that some cop is gonna see me doing this and test me for like drugs or alcohol or something and I'll come out clean. What would he even do then? Is there a protocol for clean, sober kid acting like a jerk in a CVS parking lot?


Psychological Coping


In probation people would always answer the door with armloads of cleaning supplies or holding a broom or a mop or something when they very clearly had not been cleaning. I think its a sort of psychological coping mechanism for the embarrassment of having strangers show up with the authority to inspect your house if they desire.


Back To The Financial Future


Daughter of a cop: My dad pulled next to a DeLorean at a red light and started having a little chit chat. My dad, being the classic white guy punny dad, trying to be funny asked "So what happens when you reach 88 miles?" And with out hesitation what so ever, he responds "I get a ticket."


There's nothing more unsettling than waking up in the middle of the night.

Particularly if what woke you up was a loud, unsettling creepy sound.

The only thing that could make the experience more nightmarish is opening your eyes and seeing something that makes you jump out of bed.

Most of the time, what ends up scaring the living daylights out of us is nothing more than a pile of laundry we forgot to put away or a cat's shadow, and find ourselves laughing about it weeks or even days later

Others however, haven't been so lucky, waking up to discover they were actually in legitimate danger.

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People Break Down The Times A Bully Absolutely Went Too Far
Photo by Ilayza on Unsplash

Bullying seems to be a concept that has always been around. It comes in all forms, and in varying degrees.

Sometimes, the bullying can be mild and temporary. That doesn't make it okay, but it does make the bullying easier to deal with.

Other times, the bullying is harsh, and can even go too far. Sometimes, that can mean relentless teasing. Othertimes, it can mean that a bully took their torment to a new level, even proceeding into physical violence.

Whatever the case, when bullying goes too far, it sticks with you. Sometimes, you get revenge. Other times, you just deal with it until you can find a solution. Whichever method you choose, you will never forget it.

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Here we are, decades into the life and journey of the internet.

And we still can't clean up all of the horrible spots.

The internet is a fantastic invention with many, many flaws.

Our screens have been exposed to things that will remain with our souls forever.

So let's talk about it.


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Everyone always harps on the importance of first impressions.

But we also need to pay attention to all that follows.

I'm starting to believe a first impression can be a great fake-out.

People will allow their true colors to shine over time.

Redditor Xanax_Sprite wanted everyone to open up about what things people can do that immediately change one's opinion of a person's character, not for the better.

They asked:

"What immediately makes you think less of someone?"

It's entirely too easy to turn me off. I admit, it's an issue. Maybe that's a thing people suddenly dislike about me.

Bad Behavior

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"Intentional embarrassment. When someone brings something up in front of a group to humiliate someone else."


Man Up

"Not taking responsibility for their actions."


"Even worse. people who make excuses for their mistakes, no matter how bluntly you point it out to them that this is their shortcoming. Man up and admit you make a mistake. Stop telling me A happened then B happened so C happened. we are here to work, not tell each other make believe stories."


Be Quiet

"Someone who interrupts a serious conversation to make it about them."


"Being subject to that infuriating s**t was what eventually inspired me to listen to people more, especially regarding heavier topics. Sometimes people just need to be heard and held, and it isn't fair for them to expose their vulnerabilities only to have you dismiss them by trying to make their suffering about you."


Where are they?

"How they speak about a person who is not present in the conversation."


"One of the most important lessons my father taught me..."

"Don't speak about a person if they're not in the room."

"They don't have a representative in the room and especially if your words get back to them and they can't say 'I know, he already had that convo with me.' I've earned a rep for not speaking behind people's backs to the point where when someone claimed I did, that person called them a liar. Pops sucked but I thank him for that lesson."


Be Consistent

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"100. People can change their opinions, but not flip flop regularly."


I can't with hypocrites. My life's biggest pet peeve.

Be clean

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"Yep, had a coworker once who spit on the floor inside."

"It was a warehouse-type building, but still. This particular guy also left cigarette butts on the floor inside and dumped a dog on the business property. Needless to say, he didn't last long here. Some people are just really rude and stupid."


Say Sorry

"Had a friend who never, ever apologized for anything or really took any responsibility. Even in situations which were funny and non-serious, he’d always talk his a** out of it (in a jokey matter). But when some s**t hit the fan, that guy turned into one of the scariest, manipulative and aggressive people I’ve met that would rather die than take accountability for the things he’s done."

"And for which there were many witnesses and evidence against him. Moral of the story, if you know someone who won’t say sorry or admit they did something wrong for even the least serious things, run, because when they actually do something seriously bad it’s just gonna get real ugly."


Face 2 Face

"Lying to my face. There’s no going back in my eyes because I will never trust you. Secrets are fine and dandy. That’s not quite the same as straight up lying. A direct example is people lying about their family dying to get out of work or when this older woman in her 40’s tried to lie about cleaning up her work station when she left it for me to clean."


“as a joke”

"Being mean to animals."


"Even when people joke about being mean to animals. I have a cat I love dearly and the number of comments I get about harming cats because people don’t like them 'as a joke' is infuriating and not funny, Ken."


"I include poorly training their pets in this. It’s neglect/negligence and it’s abuse."


Eyes Up

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"When they’re looking at their phones, not paying any attention to you when you’re trying to have a conversation with them."


It doesn't take much to change an impression. Let's do better.