Police Officers Describe The Dumbest Ways A Criminal Tried To Escape Custody
If you're American, you have probably heard of the show COPS or seen any of about a million law enforcement reality shows that are on the air at any given time. We've watched bounty hunters chase criminals around a small island and wondered "Where is buddy gonna go? It's an ISLAND."
We've watched more failed fence-jumps than we can count. We've chuckled our way through DUI stops that turned into comedy routines or dance parties. More people try to run away than makes any kind of sense to us, particularly in situations where they're obviously not going to successfully escape. That got us wondering, does this dumb stuff ever actually work? So we turned to Reddit where one user had asked:
Long story short, the answer is no. This dumb stuff almost never works - but it makes for great stories!
Not My Pants
A guy had green in his pocket. He tried to convince me that it wasn't his pair of pants and therefore he couldn't be punished for having drugs in the pockets...
Big Mike And The Little Bike
Knew a guy in college named Big Mike...guy was probably 6'5, 300+ pounds. Anyway, being chased by a campus cop one night he decided that his best bet was to hide.
Imagine a giant human quietly crouched behind a ten-speed bike at an otherwise empty bike rack...yeah, he was caught. Really smart guy, but apparently that did not extend to finding appropriate hiding places.
This Dude Arrested Himself
My Aunt is a cop and she tells this story wherever she goes.
She had gotten a call about a very drunk man singing in the street with an open bottle of beer. She arrives and sees him standing in the middle of the road. She turns on her lights to signify she is in a police car and he runs for it, or attempts to. First, he runs to a house on her left and he hits the mailbox and falls over. Then he proceeds to get up and run to the cop car where he attempts to get in the passenger's side. After trying for a couple of seconds he squats down a bit and bangs on the window and says:
"You have got to help me, there is a cop chasing me and I think they are coming this way."
She proceeded to unlock the rear doors and he gets in and then she locks them again and takes him to the precinct. He spent the night in the holding cell and went home with a warning for being disruptive at 3am and being drunk in a public place. Apparently he didn't remember it at all the next morning.
Truly A Light In The Darkness
Back in the '90's there was a fashion for trainers that had red lights in the sole/heel that lit up with every step. One night we had a call to a burglary and the lad doing the burgling was wearing these trainers. He ran off across some nearby wasteland, helpfully signalling every step.
Running Away From Home
My colleague was about to start the process of writing a ticket and the guy suddenly starts sprinting away, ditching his backpack, hat and coat. Thing is, we were outside his address. We still had his driving license, and his car was still running. He made it one mile down the road before trying to jump a garden fence, failing, bringing the fence down and knocking himself unconscious. Talk about dramatic.
"Quit Running, It's Hot Out Here"
So i'm not a law enforcement officer, but I've worked in a prison for almost 10 years now.
So the answer here is.......any time they try to run.
Like guy, this is a prison. You can only run so far. Sure you may get away with whatever contraband you have, but man, I've seen your face. You've been here 20 years, and I know where you live. Quit running, it's hot out here.
My family owns an automotive shop, we have a big rottweiler that runs loose around our yard when we are closed. This dog is big, strong, and mean (to strangers, he is a f*cking angel to us). This dude is running from the cops, it's Sunday, we are closed, he hopped our fence to get away from the police.
Luckily we were at the shop that day because we were rearranging some racks. Our dog, named Oso (spanish for Bear) ran after him, nearly bit him on the ass. I had to restrain the dog. After I got a hold of the dog, the guy just walked over to the cops f*cking crying.
The cops thought it was hilarious.
Nearly every foot pursuit I've had has been stopped by flora. I don't know what I've done that made mother nature owe me one, but every time I've chased someone I've ended up pulling them out of a bush. One guy I had for DUI took off in the middle of field sobriety tests and ran straight into a thorn bush. Instead of going in after him, I just waited patiently while he freed himself, at which point he just walked over to me and put his hands behind his back.
Had a guy with a warrant for drugs and burglary. He tried to give me his brothers name. Guess he forgot we went to school together since kindergarten.
Confessions Of A Drunken Moron
Not a cop, but a former criminal here. I had gone to a bar with my ex and we got super wasted. Some dudes were following me around and being obnoxious. My ex was playing pool and saw what was going on and came up and cracked the leader of the group over his head with a pool stick. Blood everywhere. He wase on the ground bleeding all over next to a broken pool stick. I had light grey jeans on and they had blood spattered on them. I lived walking distance away from the bar so we both take off running for home. We get separated and I'm running by myself, covered in blood.
A cop comes out of nowhere and grabs me and puts me in the car. I am super drunk and being obnoxious about everything. Turns out I had a warrant. They take me in to the station to book me. I was sitting alone in booking handcuffed to the bench for what felt like forever. I decide that since I only live a couple houses up from the police station I can slip the cuff and make a run for it. So I do. I get almost to the exit and all of a sudden I'm smooshed up against the wall. Before I know it I am double-cuffed to the bench.
In my drunk mind I thought this would totally go smoothly. Didn't really work out. Glad those days are behind me.
Not a cop myself, but one told me this story when he was helping me recover my stolen bike (a great story itself).
Some kid stole a bike and took off with this cop giving chase. It's kid on bike vs man on foot, but after about 30 seconds the kid throws down the bike and takes off on foot. I guess he thought if he left the bike they'd leave him alone?
Anyways, the cop just grabs the bike, hops on and runs him down on the bike that he stole. Insta-justice.
There were some people ice skating on a pond that was off limits. We showed up and everyone got off the pond except for 1 guy. He skated with glee as he taunted us and yelling:
"You can't do anything to me if I stay out here!"
One of the responding officers had played ice hockey in college. He asked the crowd,
_"Does anyone have a size 9 hockey skate"? _
Someone offered their skates. The officer put them on and skated with fury right at the rogue skater. The rogue skater tried to get away, then he tried to surrender but the die had been cast. The hockey playing police officer checked the guy and sent him flying.
We arrested him for. Where did he think he was going to go? He was on a freaking pond.
Don't Laugh From Your Hiding Place
Went to a domestic in the middle of the night with the boyfriend long gone by the time we arrived. After chatting with the girlfriend for 20 minutes I did a quick walk through the yard to say I made an effort. Yard has a few piles of scrap and 4 rusted cars. I can't see anyone, so turn to leave and walk straight into a massive spider web.
I screamed and the boyfriend/offender hiding under a pile of metal sheets laughs.
Was an ex-manager at a movie theater.
Some young adults/teenagers decided they wanted to steal something, so they tried to steal a wet floor sign (one that was like 10 years old and was filthy)
What they didn't account for was that we were hosting a police event, there were K9 units, police officers in full uniform, we even had 2 officers on horseback in the parking lot.
So 3 these people are trying to get away on foot and half of them on skateboard. The 3 or so on foot are being chased by a good dozen police officers.
2 are trying to get away on skateboard..and had horseback mounted police chasing them.
All of them were caught within 5 minutes.
Have you ever seen mounted horseback police chase down a perp? It's glorious.
Championship Wrestler, Terrible At Fences
I was working Oktoberfest with another MP, driving around in a golf cart making sure no one got out of hand. We notice one guy in particular who has all the signs. Yelling, aggressive, spilling beer (you have to be pretty drunk to spill a $7 beer.) So we start driving over to make sure someone in his group can keep control over him.
He sees us coming and takes off running.
The entire event is surrounded by a 10 foot chain link fence. There are 2 openings, the main entrance/exit in the front and a staff entrance on one side. He starts running for the staff entrance. We drive behind him, but start to notice he's not quite headed for the giant opening in the fence. Instead, he ends up about 6 feet to the right of it and just starts climbing the fence. We just rolled through the opening and waited for him to drop on the other side.
That was the easy part, though. The hard part was getting the cuffs on the f*cker. It took 3 grown men. We found out later he was a state champion wrestler in high school.
Saw a well known local (who had a warrant) going into his house, so I shouted to him. He turned, looked and scurried inside his house and locked the door.
_"Mark, come and answer I know you are in there." _
A fake high pitched voice replied:
_"Mark isn't here!" _
I told him how stupid he sounded but he still wouldn't answer the door. Ended up kicking the door in and breaking the frame.
I didn't know people were this stupid until I did this job!
The Best And Worst
I have both a best and worst, all from the same party.
Setting the scene:
It's New Years Eve and we are at a big high school party - everyone is getting absolutely hammered and I was splitting a handle with one other guy and we are doing a great job at that. Naturally, the cops show up and everyone tries to run or hide. A lot of us try to hide upstairs and get caught.
My buddy (who I split the handle of captain with) is being led down the steps in front of me by a cop that knows him from loads of previous issues in this small borough. He decides to make a break for it since his house is down the street.
He gets to the front door - locked.
Back door - locked.
Jumps off the deck - onto his face.
Tries the garage - locked.
Shimmies between the garage and the fence to keep running. Makes it to the gravel driveway and falls several times on his face.
The cop was just casually walking behind him and finally picks him up on the third or fourth fall. My buddy walks in the door, handcuffed, screaming "motherf*cker tasered me!" The officer did not. He just fell repeatedly. He also ended up with alcohol poisoning.
*Now for the good one: *
While all of this was going on, my other friend slipped into the basement where he found a massive pile of dirty laundry, slipped in and proceeded to watch an entire basketball game through an eye hole he made while all his friends were upstairs getting arrested and picked up by parents.
Ok I am NOT a cop but...
I was once boating on a lake not long ago and noticed a boat that just seemed overcrowded to me. It also look pretty low in the water. Thinking it might be taking on water I went to see if they needed help.
As I got close I see a big splash and hear a kah-ploosh. As I pulled alongside one of them says "sh*t... he's not a cop. Quick get the green" One guy jumps over the side and dives only to come up empty handed.
I was wearing an old _The Police _concert shirt.
Window Removal Service
Served a warrant at a residence in an upscale neighborhood (or what passes for upscale in rural Oklahoma). One of VERY few homes in our city/state that actually had a basement. The wanted individual was hiding in said basement. The door to the basement was hidden as part of (behind) the pantry. Once he realized we discovered the basement access, in a panic, he tried to escape out of the tiny basement (slider) window. Wasn't a big dude, but that opening was small and he got himself stuck. I mean REALLY stuck.
We wound up having to have the window completely removed with him in it, and then cut him out of the frame.
Being woken up suddenly is not very good for our health.
Especially for the elderly, it's not something to make a habit of. Sleep interruption can increase blood pressure, cause a worsened self image, and cause a day filled with irritation and confusion.
No one wants to be woken up, but there are definitely some reasons for being woken up that are worse than your alarm clock.
We went to Ask Reddit to find out some of the worst reasons people have been woken up.
Redditor Toothpiicxxk asked:
"What's the worst reason you woke up?"
These truly are the worst.
We love our pets, but sometimes not so much.
"My cat was throwing up right next to me."
"She brought you breakfast how cute."
"I was just about to answer that my cat threw up right on me, specifically my hair, which I had just washed..."
Some horrible news hits you.
"Being woken up to be told someone you know died certainly qualifies."
"Or when you already know, but you wake up in that ignorant bliss that lasts for about a second and then it hits you. And this goes on for a long time."
"It's been about 15 years and I still will wake up on occasion thinking I have to tell my older brother something cool that I know he'd love to hear about. Or have a vivid a** dream about how it was all an mistake and he's still here. Happens less often then it used to but oof does it ever still hurt."
"Woke up at about 3am to a cop repeatedly ringing my bell. my mom had accidentally drowned in the tub. she was really weak from chemo."
"Woke up to a phone call telling me my incredible brother-in-law had been hit and killed by a drunk & high driver, his wife was also expected to pass as her neck had been broken, and their kids were both in surgery. My husband and I were in the will to get the kids, so we needed to fly to Chicago right away. As I sat there in shock, I hung up the phone, turned to see my sleeping husband snoring away, and knowing I would now have to wake him up to tell him the worst news he would ever hear."
2018 false missile alert.
"I live in Hawaii, that time we got the missile scare."
"Oof at least it wasn't real but I would have definitely panicked if that was me."
"Damn, I slept straight through it. My mom literally woke me up, told me; and I still went back to sleep."
"What were you supposed to do? Go outside and witness your annihilation?"
"I think it's the right thing to do to inform people even if there isn't necessarily anything that can be done about it."
"Some people would appreciate being able to conduct prayers, get one last hug with their loved ones, etc."
"Cockroach walking on my lips with no shame. I brutally murdered it as soon as I yeeted it halfway across the room."
"I had a weird dream about a cockroach somehow paralyzing a friend then walking towards me in that same room. Then I awoke to find this a**hole cockroach slowly creeping on my lips."
"When I threw it away, what startled me was it did not panic AT ALL. It even slowly headed towards me!"
"I also mouth washed and brushed my teeth and even disinfected my lips with alcohol. It was a surreal experience."
"I seriously loathe roaches and there's no other way to ensure its death than a brutal one."
Screams in the night.
"One time I got woken up by a blood curdling scream in the middle of the night. I live alone and it also woke up my dog who was freaked out the rest of the night. Searched everywhere including outside and didn't find anything."
"Well that was lucky. Imagine what would have happened if you had found it..."
"Hopefully a fox, coyote, cat, or cougar."
"Being clearly asleep, and then someone wakes you to ask, 'Are you asleep?'"
"Bruh my mom be like [this]."
"The only correct answer to this question is 'yes.'"
"I woke up to my mom calling me sobbing because she thought I had died, I was 10 hours away and my blood sugar was severely low and wasn't answering any calls, that was horrifying."
"We've learned what does and doesn't work for waking me up in a medical emergency."
"Blood sugar can be a b*tch, found my mum having a really bad hypo while sleeping when I was a toddler and for years and years after would wake her up to check she was okay without realizing I was doing it for that reason. Glad you're okay!"
Something so relatable.
"My alarm rung. It's a daily struggle."
We've all been there.
If you're not a morning person, waking up in the morning can already be a challenge, but no one wants to get woken up to horrible news or an emergency.
In fact, we should be waking up naturally with our own personal sleeping patterns.
We all know that's easier said than done.
People have a habit of excusing crap behavior - honestly because it's often easier in the short term. Long term = flaming dumpster fire.
The excuses people use to dismiss behavior range from mundane and meaningless to the sort of leaps normally reserved for kangaroos and Olympians. It's sometimes amazing that these excuses work - but they do.
Some of them work so well that they're just sort of "accepted." That, obviously, kind of sucks and is something we should avoid - so let's talk about 'em.
Can't swerve around what you don't see, ya know?
Reddit user TMTtasmachine asked:
... and away we go.
" 'That's just how they are.' "
"One of the biggest enablers for tantrum throwing, bullying, etc. is that they get treated with kid gloves to avoid dealing with them." - alexrt87
"Oh my God you hit the nail on the head. Whenever someone says 'that's just the way they are' I say:"
" 'Yes, that's the point! Glad you noticed too! Now is it okey-doke for them to be jerks they have special jerk privileges? Or maybe they are just people and should treat everyone else as such?' " - notatrumpchump
"It depends on how it's said."
"People are the way that they are, and you shouldn't be surprised when they continue to be that way."
"This, obviously, doesn't excuse it - but people also shouldn't be surprised when a bad person continues to make bad decisions. Neither should we waste space in our minds being bothered by it." - unlawfulfoxy
Harassment Isn't Humorseason 2 lol GIF by ShamelessGiphy
" 'It's just a joke, bro.' Harassing people isn't humor." - loading__99
"A guy who says/does offensive things and decides whether he was joking based on the reaction of people around him." - Eatsleeptren
"Dude, legit had someone come up to me and start shouting in my face, calling me Madison, pretending I was cheating on him. Literally the most crowded location outside a theater, everyone staring at us, looking at me like I was some horrible cheater while I was out with my then fiancé."
"I started hyperventilating, my fiancé nearly decked the dude, and then someone shouts 'CUT' like this is some big 'YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA' moment and everything's supposed to be okay."
"I burst into tears."
"It was the most humiliating moment of my life, and thank god my then fiancé, now husband is not the type to overreact or jump to conclusions, or be abusive. Imagine how bad that could have been for someone with an angry or abusive partner."
"Prank videos are a plague on the internet and there is a REASON so many of them are fake, or involve actors." - Darkovika
Stay Sober, Then!Drunk Drinking Beer GIFGiphy
" 'I was drunk / high / etc.' "
"Then don't drink?! Stay sober if you can't NOT be an a**hole!" - BasedBenjamin
"Alternately, I hear a lot of 'I'm a happy drunk!' "
"Yeah, according to your drunk a$s. That doesn't mean you're not an ahole. Not remembering is not an excuse either." - PepeBabinski
"I was also loud, obnoxious, and I wouldn't remember sh*t the next day."
"Quitting drinking has been one of my best choices of my life." - TTungsteNN
"Help"new girl coach GIFGiphy
" 'I'm just trying to help you' " - Miserable-Air1234
"Every time I've heard this, they're manipulating me while helping only themselves." - mykittenfarts
"My Mom to a T. Everything she does is better than anyone else's and she always gets pissed that people don't praise her for 'helping.' "
"She's now a certified (by herself) psychic and I have come to the conclusion that she's not a covert narcissist but an obvious one. I really wish I was joking." - Silent_Discussion657
Parenting ProblemsLeave Me Alone Run GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy
"Any variation of 'I'm a Mother/parent.' "
"Had some lady cut me in line at a coffee shop and she hit me with 'I'm a single Mom of 3!' as her excuse."
"Ok? And? I was still here first." - maid-for-hire
"I'm a single mom and I f*cking haaaate when other single moms/parents pull that sh*t to get special treatment."
"Last week, I was having a rough morning, my kid was being difficult, and I was running late. I was rude to a cashier over a minor inconvenience."
"Not only did I apologize for my shitty behavior, I wrote corporate to let them know how professional and patient she was while I acted like a f*cking toddler."
"Was being a parent part of the reason I was frustrated? Absolutely. Was it an excuse for that behavior? HELL no."
"I acted like a b*tch, and I called myself out, and I apologized. I still feel bad about that - I rarely let things get to me to the point I snap at others." - ClusterfckyShtshow
"Wow. I'm a Mom as well and tired but it doesn't give anyone a right to use it as some sort of ploy to get away with stuff."
"Like, mice become Moms about 12 times a year. You're not special 🤣" - SpoonLoops
Believing Your BossThe Office Monday GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"I had a boss say some really racist sh*t around me one day and the next day, out of nowhere, he says:"
" 'Don't believe half the things that come out of my mouth!' "
"It was not really an excuse, more like trying to cover for himself after the fact, but still stuck with me." - sirlongbottom441
"Report them to HR. Seriously." - kokichi--ouma
"Looking past the racist stuff for a bit, that's not a very encouraging thing to hear from a boss…" - WonderfulBlackberry9
Bad Day AgainBad Day Reaction GIF by Schitt's CreekGiphy
" 'I'm having a bad day/week' "
"Okay, so you decide everybody that you interact with deserves the same fate? Get out of here, dude." - myordinaryexistence
"We all got stress, don't take it out on me. I get some people have stress bad enough for it to be passable every once and a while (family member passing, etc) but general, stress should not lead to you being a jerk to me." - willsimpforfree
"Damn, I'm definitely guilty of this. Usually I remember to apologize after but at this point I've learned to just avoid the situation in the first place by minimizing my interaction with people if I'm in a shitty mood." - nozzzrul
"Reminds me of when that White boy went on a murder rampage and killed a bunch of Asian women & that a-hole sheriff gave a press conference telling the media that the 'poor boy had a bad day.' "
"My idea of a bad day involves going home after a rough day at work and just staying in the house."
"Apparently, I should change my ethnicity from Asian to White and go on a murder rampage, see if my @ss gets a sympathetic sheriff to say on my behalf that I had 'a bad day.' " - kingkazul400
It's Not An ExcuseSeason 2 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy
"This won't go down well, but using depression as an excuse. As someone who suffers from it, it's still not ok to treat others like sh*t" - Rainbowwallstickers
"Could not agree enough. My partner has a 'friend' who treats everyone like sh*t all the time, has no consideration for others and openly mocks people in public."
"She gets so much grace from those around her under the guise of her 'mental health.' It's so infuriating watching an adult woman never have to take responsibility for her actions." - 34boor
"I get there are some things you can't control, but you are still responsible for keeping that sh*t in check and if you're aware of your mental illness, you should be aware of how you approach people and situations."
"I'll admit I used to be guilty of using my mental illness to be an @ss, but now I'm trying to better myself" - VeeSquibbles
Florida Gonna FloridaLooney Tunes Florida GIFGiphy
"People are letting Florida off the hook way too damn much. And I live in Florida."
"Just because it's hilarious doesn't mean it isn't still completely f*cked up." - AlphaWhiskeyOscar
"The phrase 'Florida Man' is almost always followed some heinous way a Floridian is being an a$$hole." - PepeBabinski
"I'm also originally from Florida, and that state has serious problems. We need to pay attention to it." - [Reddit]
Moment of honesty ... as a Floridian ... yeaaaah, I'm gonna have to agree with that last one.
We live in a time where we are critically re-examining how we pay workers. After a two-year-long pandemic where some low-income and "unskilled" jobs were deemed "essential," we now must put our money where our mouth is.
For too long in the world have incredibly important jobs been overlooked or else outright maligned. Teachers in the USA make some of the least money, career-wise, and have some of the hardest jobs. Dancers pay to put their bodies through hell with no guarantee of paid work after training.
So how do we fix this problem? By naming it, of course.
Redditor u/NightReader5 asked:
"What professions are severely underpaid?"
Here were some of those answers.
Our Elderly Deserve Better
"I worked as a CNA in a nursing home and I loved it. It's such hard work for such little pay and that's why I had to leave."
"Not only that but I was a rare person in that I LOVED caring for the residents. Nothing was beneath me such as changing a dirty diaper or spoon feeding."
"Everything helped their quality of life. Sucks they can't keep people that genuinely enjoy it cause I couldn't make over $10 an hour."-Dancer9d9
"Came here to say this: Emergency Medical Technicians. I will never not be just a bit salty about this."
"My husband is one of those people who does this job because it's his passion and he loves helping people."
"It would be nice if he earned more than the kid who just got hired at McDonald's this morning."-ThePotterheadHobbit
High School Bathrooms....
"The janitors at my high school. I walked in the men's bathroom there once and there was a mega-giant steaming pile of crap and diarrhea right in the middle of the floor."-satanic-sex-god
"Anyhow. Are you sure that was a high school? We're talking grades 9-12 here, right?"-VoicedVelarNasal
"Unfortunately yes. Other highlights of my oh so great high school men's bathroom that contains teenagers from 14 to as old as 20 are:"
"A dude bringing a sledgehammer to school and smashing a sink, the toilets being blown up, the toilets being frequently clogged with trash..."
"Smashed beer bottle glass covering the floor, and a centimeter of pee flooding the bathroom whenever you walk in. I hate it here."-satanic-sex-god
You know immediately YOU might not want to do this job--so why is someone else getting paid next to nothing to do it?
The More You Help Others The Less You Get Paid
"Statistically speaking, any job that provides significant social benefit to others, the less you will get paid, something that David Graeber discusses in essays and his work, Bullsh*t Jobs."
"This is so sad. I'm currently in a job that pays very well, I just dont find any meaning or fulfillment with it. I want so badly to do something where I'd be helping others- something with purpose- but I honestly dont think I can afford it."-mko0njo9
"Social workers. Dealing with negligent, abusive parents while trying to help the children while in an underfunded, low-paid system is a travesty."-ZRX1200R
"Can also confirm. I like working with my family's but I don't get paid enough to deal with their crap or most of the bureaucracy."-Altowhovian93
Minimum Wage To Go Against FIRE
"Entry level wildland firefighters. They start them at $15 an hour."-NuclearEyedSquirrel
"I live in a small town in Ohio and I think the lowest starting wage I've seen was 11."
"That's the low side and those places are having trouble hiring because there's so many places paying higher. McDonald's here starts at 13 or 14 an hour."-rjoh4459
One Kid, One Para
"Paraprofessionals. Yea, my town increased the pay rate for paraprofessionals to get more people to apply since they have a shortage but the pay increase was not that good IMO."
"For that job, I think you need to be compensated for the physical and mental demands of the job."
"It's a hard job and they should be paid for the work, the pay rate in my community for the job with 60 credits is $14.50 but I think it should be more than that."-YourQueen2Bee
The question then becomes, why won't the people who HAVE money do something to help the quality of these jobs, and make sure that these people get paid?
"Everything in veterinary medicine. Kennel technicians, Veterinary assistants, Veterinary technicians, Veterinary receptionists, and Veterinarians."-aIsiduous
"Veterinary interns/residents, too. I work 70-120hrs+ per week, am on call about half the days per month, have to pay for my own board exams and accreditation fees out of pocket, and all for ~$33,000 per year."-WyrdHarper
"It's bullsh*t. There's nothing on this planet I want to do more than be a veterinarian, but I simply cannot afford the debt. Hopefully one day we'll get the recognition deserved. Stick in there, I know you got this!"--aIsiduous
In The Classroom
"I work in a special school, I love it but I really don't think we get paid enough for all the times we get yelled at, punched, kicked, bit, spat on, cursed at, have our classrooms trashed, have things thrown at us..."
"And then we also have parents making demands and admin telling us their 'simple' solutions to all of it that we have to carry out while they have zero clue on what it's actually like to spend a day in the classroom."-Sajiri
A Morbid State Of Affairs
"Funeral directors/embalmers/funeral professionals. We didn't get days or holidays off to begin with. Now the pandemic has stretched us to working double overtime, which we are exempt from getting paid for under Florida statutes."
"And forget hazard pay for being exposed to COVID multiple times a day every day via the deceased, the deceased's family members, the general public attending funerals, and the hospital/nursing facilities we remove decedents from."-Lesscute
So why are we holding off on giving these people a raise? Their jobs involve dangerous, mentally and emotionally taxing situations, and yet, we treat them as if society could function without them. The truth is it couldn't.
And society had best learn that as soon as possible.
What causes a small town to die?
Honestly, there can be quite a few factors, but perhaps the biggest one is that small towns often lack the upward mobility opportunities that are more available in urban areas.
As a result, many towns around the United States for instance have lost tens of millions of people as their populations seek jobs and opportunities elsewhere.
And what remains of these places can be pretty sketchy.
People told us more after Redditor RadicalizedSnackWrap asked the online community,
"What's a super sketchy US city that we never hear about?"
"Daytona Beach, FL. Imagine a bunch of alcoholic high school kids who came for spring break in 1984, and never left, and never grew up."
Oh, I don't have to imagine it.
I've seen it!
I lived in a neighboring town for a while and bodies would always turn up in farmer's fields that the cartel in Yakima had dropped off there."
Sounds like Netflix needs to get its hands on Yakima, a new show to go against Ozark.
"I remember a story..."
"Guntersville, Alabama. If I were to ballpark it, over 80% of the population are meth addicts and traffickers.
I remember a story where a man walked into the Walmart, took all the supplies and equipment required to cook, and proceeded to cook meth in the bathroom."
"A run-down town..."
"Reading, PA. A run-down town that is mostly used as a central point to run drugs between New York and Philly."
I am writing this from right nearby actually, and I can smell it from here.
"Small town almost entirely..."
"Butte, Montana. Small town almost entirely comprised of violent meth heads."
"More of a town than a city..."
More of a town than a city, but it's such a weird place, bordering on Twilight Zone. You'll see a meth house right next to a youth theatre."
According to a friend I have who spent a lot of time in Arizona, this sounds about right.
"Used to have..."
"Gary, Indiana. Used to have a prosperous steel economy, but now it's just home to abandoned buildings, failing infrastructure, and lots and lots of crime. Just look up pictures."
"I always said..."
"Amityville. Yes, that Amityville.
I always said the "Amityville Horror" house is for amateurs. You want something scary, put on a nice watch or a gold chain and wander around downtown Amityville after dark."
I went there once.
I have not been back.
"It looks harmless..."
"Harrisburg PA. It looks harmless and maybe a little boring but holy hell that place is a giant puddle of corruption just waiting for someone to step in it. Not just state government, there's a bunch of layers you can use to crawl up the corruption ladder."
"Used to be..."
"Natchez, Mississippi. Use to be the headquarters for the KKK. Not much there besides crackheads, plantation homes, and European tourists. Don't own a nice place if you're black, you'll be stopped by the police and questioned."
It doesn't look any of these are changing anytime soon, and that's sad.
Have some small towns to tell us about? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!