Every job has its foibles, but customer service work has arguably the most pitfalls of them all.
Dealing directly with other human beings—all their emotions and hang-ups and expectations and entitlements—is pretty much a one-way ticket to misunderstandings.
But when you add in the fact that the customer service employee is also human and also full of all the extremely dumb stuff humans are full of? Well that lethal combination is a recipe for disaster.
This is one of those stories.
The TIFU (Today I Fu**ed Up) subReddit recently lit up with a pizza delivery guy's harrowing story, titled "TIFU by continuously making a customer angry when delivering them pizza." On its face, it seems like just another tale of a customer being that wonderful combo of unlikable and weird.
We've all encountered that guy. But the story quickly takes a hard left into "Oh...no..."
Redditor Kyle__'s story starts off pretty standard. He shows up with some pizzas, knocks on the door of a very loud party and gets a less than enthusiastic greeting when the door opens:
"This massive dude with hair down to his a** answers and yells at me for knocking too loud. I apologized, and went on my way."
Fairly typical "oh I'm SO sorry for DOING MY JOB" customer service stuff, right?
Sure, until the following weekend, when he delivers pizzas to another unit in the same building.
"This tall bald dude answers. I ask him if he knows the guy upstairs, and told him the a**hole upstairs yelled at me for knocking too loud. He looks at me puzzled, and says 'I know, that was me, I bought this 4 plex'. The dude shaved his head. From hair to his a**, to bald."
Yikes.
Our Pizza Dude, after he "instantly died inside" apologized and went on his way, no harm no foul.
Until the next weekend, when he really upped the ante by, well, destroying the dude's property.
"...the loop on my pizza bag got hooked on his mail box that was hung on the fence. It ripped the mail box clear off the fence, and flung it down the stairs."
Can't get worse than this, though, right?
Don't worry, it does.
"It actually bounced off his door when it landed. He opened the door to see me looking like a deer in headlights, frantically pointing at his mailbox (which was bent and twisted now) and trying to explain that I really didn't mean to do it."
And if you can believe it, this guy ended up delivering to this customer again—though thankfully this time there was a happy ending.
"After he paid I nervously said 'Hey, I didn't even insult you or wreck your property this time'. He laughed, said 'good job' and handed me a $5 tip."
Aww!
And now they're best friends.
Just kidding, they actually never crossed paths again, which is probably for the best.
Naturally, Kyle__'s fellow Redditors had plenty to say about this weird tale.
"'I know, that was me' LOL, dying" --u/GrauGeist8888
"Finally a good Tifu, I thought for sure you were gonna end up having sex somehow." --u/Hasnath_249
"Reminds me of the Pizza Delivery Guy from Home Alone who kept running over their damn statue." --u/ChefChopNSlice
And several gave him props for making the best of a sticky situation.
"You didn't FU imo. The man even laughed at your joke and tipped you.I see it as a win considering you destroyed his mailbox and called him an a**hole." --u/Fuhgly
"I dunno, sounds like you handled it well." --u/LostestGoat
Though not exactly everyone was on the pizza guy's side.
"...Don't call customers a**holes to their neighbors (or to anyone really). They might be friends (or the same person in this insane story)." --u/phunkydroid
"Like massive respect to this dude for not punching you" --u/RetardedGaming
And several folks had some wild pizza-related stories of their own to share.
"Oh man, delivering pizzas was generally fun! I was offered a St. Bernard puppy, bags of marijuana, and coke as tips (which I did not take). Only sad I couldn't take the puppy...." --u/Elle3786
"I delivered pizzas in college and I guess I knocked too loud over their music. The guy swung the door opened and yelled at me for 'knocking on the door like I was the cops'"--u/SatireDiva74
"Late to the party here but I was once a pizza driver too. One time I unknowingly delivered a pizza with a slice missing. Turns out one of the guys in back had made a pizza for himself and someone else mistakenly put the ticket on that box."
"The look on the woman's face when I had to re-deliver her pizza was one of pure disgust. She probably really thought I had eaten a slice of their pizza, and likely wasn't sure I didn't tamper with this new one. That was almost 15 years ago and I still think about it sometimes at night and get uncomfortable." --u/RickGrimesLol
Anyway, if there's a moral here, it's this: If you put your foot in your mouth, at least don't up the ante by damaging someone's property.
Customer Service 101, folks.
But what about the genuinely well-behaved celebrities? Well, they are not without haters too, unfortunately.
For instance, stars like Taylor Swift – who has been a positive role model and ally of the LGBTQ community – still has her share of critics no matter how hard she tries to shake it off.
Curious to hear positive examples from strangers online, Redditor AndweleHarris asked:
"Who's that one celebrity that has like no haters?"
These Canadian comics were found to be simply irresistible.
The Actor From 'Honey I Shrunk The Kids"
"Rick Moranis. The guy stopped acting to take care of his kids after his wife's death."
– joeO44
Aspiring Football Player
"John Candy"
– zen1001
"My favorite John Candy story: Joe Montana was playing for the 49ers in an important game, may have even been the Super Bowl. His team is down, they've got a lot of ground to cover and not a lot of time to do it."
"Montana comes into the huddle and starts calling the play, then stops and points to the stands and says:"
"Hey, isn't that John Candy?"
"Teammates look over, and it is, indeed, John Candy. Turns out he was a big football fan."
"Montana returned his focus to the game and went on to lead a game-winning drive down the field."
These European personalities won the hearts of many people from around the world.
The Dowager Countess of Grantham
"Maggie Smith"
"Professor McGonagall is the most underrated Harry Potter character in the series."
"She is so funny, even when she is strictly serious! But I mostly praise Maggie Smith for her line delivery in general."
Practically perfect
"Julie Andrews"
– __Soju__
"I effing LOVE her story about how Walt Disney waited for her to give birth before filming Mary Poppins. Keep in mind at that stage Julie Andrews was nothing more than a mildly successful West End/Broadway actress. The fact that one of the biggest film producers at the time wanted her specifically to play Mary Poppins AND he was happy to wait until after her pregnancy is a true testament to her phenomenal acting and singing ability."
"It paid off too: Julie Andrews won the Oscar for Best Actress for her role as Mary Poppins, her feature film debut too!"
A.K.A. André René Roussimoff
"Andre the Giant."
"i was fortunate enough to catch a screening of The Princess Bride in Nashville a couple years ago; Cary Elwes (who plays the love interest) was there after the show and told some stories about working with different cast members. when he got to Andre, he recounted how he was the 'mood maker' of the cast and always had a smile on his face. he even broke his foot during one of the last scenes but powered through it because the other actors had been filming all day and wanted to go home."
"a real shame that he passed away so prematurely."
– 8-chan
These real American idols are truly adored.
Viggo Wherever He Goes
"Viggo Mortensen"
"He once gave my mom some chocolates, she still talks about it haha. In an industry rife with ego and jerks, he's a great guy."
America's Sweetheart
"Dolly Parton"
"She had me at, 'It takes a lot of money to look this cheap!' She does plenty of good in this world."
– Phuni44
GIF by Dolly PartonGiphyBetty White"
"Google her variety show. A ton of people hated her because she wouldn't fire her black costar. She pretty much told those people to f*** off for lack of a better term and it makes me love her even more!"
I can confidently assume Dick Van Dyke has no haters.
How could he? He's a lovable icon and is a very affable person to work with.
I would know. Although it was a brief blip in my performing career, I had the honor to share the stage with the Disney legend known for playing Bert in Mary Poppins.
He was extremely gracious and he shook hands with all of us in the ensemble of our show while looking at us individually with a glimmer in his eye.
He loves people. You could tell. And we love him.