Koch posted a video of Sadie Lou—who Koch and her husband have nicknamed LBD, for "Little Brown Dog"—to her Twitter and Instagram feeds, where LBD's palpable excitement instantly went viral.
Prepare yourself for cuteness overload.
Not sure who was more excited. Glad she remembers me after a year! https://t.co/sScVXHMHJn— Christina H Koch (@Christina H Koch)1581621972.0
What a good girl. There's simply nothing better than when a dog gets so happy they run around not knowing what to do.
And that tail-wagging that shakes her whole body... What a good girl.
Of course, LBD's effusiveness only makes sense—328 days is approximately 6.29 years in dog time.
In any case, it seems certain that Koch needn't have worried about LBD forgetting her.
Pretty sure the velocity of that tail-wagging is some kind of land-speed record.
Speaking to reporters at Houston's Johnson Space Center after her arrival, Koch addressed her tear-jerking reunion with LBD:
"She was very excited, I was very excited, I'm not sure who was more excited!"
Speaking to Houston's KPRC News, Koch also spoke of how she stayed focused and motivated while away from home—and LBD—for so long.
"You have to become a mental cheerleader for yourself...It helps you to recognize every day how special what you have is, which then, in turn, makes you feel you need to bring your best to meet that every single day."
The internet was over the moon, if you will, about this adorable reunion.
@Astro_Christina That is pure joy— LorettaFaucher🌊🌊🌊🌊 (@LorettaFaucher🌊🌊🌊🌊)1581629172.0
@Astro_Christina https://t.co/pfV7134K4l— NASA (@NASA)1581622601.0
@Astro_Christina @NASA_Astronauts This is so precious. https://t.co/Ly3KlBhRmL— Codie West (@Codie West)1581622127.0
@Astro_Christina this video is EVERYTHING 😭— Sarafina Nance (@Sarafina Nance)1581624743.0
@Astro_Christina There are three kinds of happy: 1. Regular happy. 2. Dog happy! 3. Insane dog happy!!!— William Singourd, 🌈 #BLM #RESIST #ImpeachTRUMP (@William Singourd, 🌈 #BLM #RESIST #ImpeachTRUMP)1581629177.0
@Astro_Christina This is one of the most pure expressions of joy in history.— Mary Robinette Kowal (@Mary Robinette Kowal)1581655614.0
@Astro_Christina Never underestimate animals. When a pet is well cared for and loved by someone, they reciprocate… https://t.co/F4M1XUeCuh— Nazo (@Nazo)1581629501.0
Astronaut Christina Koch returning to her dog after her record-breaking stint in space is *truly* delightful https://t.co/MbQNqD0GxH— Colleen Hagerty (@Colleen Hagerty)1581622791.0
dogs are just the best. even Twitter can't ruin dogs. https://t.co/sQKMkkuAP2— amateur Zamboni driver of "extraordinary talent" (@amateur Zamboni driver of "extraordinary talent")1581652795.0
someone hold me i'm crying so hard https://t.co/yqNM9q4QN0— Eli Loren (@Eli Loren)1581693101.0
@Astro_Christina Welcome home @Astro_Christina... that’s one small step for woman, one giant leap for woman’s best… https://t.co/EfpBqTI05R— David Schneider (@David Schneider)1581639517.0
Koch launched into space on March 14, 2019, where she conducted six space walks and conducted hundreds of experiments. She landed back on earth February 6 in Kazakhstan, before returning to the U.S. and her beloved LBD.
Welcome home, Christina!
Calcaterra recently discovered his daughter is either a skilled comedian, a mad genius, or maybe both—and will definitely be taking over the world one day. She's been working on a map that fundamentally reshapes the Western hemisphere, triggers multiple wars and also gives us a second Ohio, and it is... well, it's something.
As Calcaterra relayed on Twitter, it all began with the simplest of parental questions: "Got any homework?"
And well...
Last night: Me: Got any homework? Anna: Nah. Me: Whatcha gonna do? Anna: Have a map I’m working on. Just fou… https://t.co/AlJcfy8adc— Craig Calcaterra (@Craig Calcaterra)1581516405.0
Just your average map, just a fun doodle from a teenager's sketchbook.
Until you look closer and do the reading...
@craigcalcaterra/Twitter
Honestly, it's hard to discern whether Calcaterra's daughter needs to be stopped because she's using her genius for evil, or if she's the leader we've all been waiting for. Who's to say?
Because a lot of her proposals seem totally reasonable.
Like combining Vermont and New Hampshire just makes sense. So does melding the Dakotas.
Less clutter.
And swapping the Virginias seems fair.
West Virginia's been in Virginia's shadow all this time, so why not switch it around and let West Virginia have a chance to shine?
And letting Florida secede, well... we can probably all get behind that.
It's already its own world in practice anyway.
But increasing the size of both Texas and Idaho—such that it takes over not just the middle of the US but a huge swath of Canada too? By unanimous vote‽‽
Utter madness.
And not just because Oklahoma loses its cute panhandle in the process.
And this whole Long Chile thing is... it's just...
And A SECOND OHIO?
We have enough on our hands with the first one.
Anyway, as you might expect, folks on Twitter had lots to say about Anna's new world order.
@craigcalcaterra But! What happened to Alaska?— Ben (@Ben)1581516641.0
@craigcalcaterra OMG. Count me in. Surprised she didn't mess with MI though. Lot to work with here. Suggest she sho… https://t.co/5m7GhzqnZD— Ernst (@Ernst)1581516693.0
@lizroscher @craigcalcaterra As a native Minnesotan, I take umbrage with the name change.— Steven Nelson (@Steven Nelson)1581516560.0
@craigcalcaterra Apropos of nothing https://t.co/kVE8tFoXkg— Scott Moomaw (@Scott Moomaw)1581517022.0
@aboutamoo @craigcalcaterra Fixed it to make it accurate to the new world order map. :-) https://t.co/aiD46vkgjJ— Kyle Eden (@Kyle Eden)1581540292.0
The Ohio thing definitely raised some eyebrows.
@craigcalcaterra Most offensive part is an *additional* Ohio— Lil Dumplin (@Lil Dumplin)1581516751.0
@craigcalcaterra All of this is reasonable except that Ohio 2 should be named 2 O 2 Hio.— Jesse Spector (@Jesse Spector)1581516788.0
@jessespector @craigcalcaterra H2hiO— Marie Baguette (@Marie Baguette)1581525294.0
@kyleinmke @craigcalcaterra Ohio 2: Skyline Boogaloo— Erik Carlson (@Erik Carlson)1581516823.0
As did Canada's seeming acquiescence to Anna's imperialism.
@craigcalcaterra I like that Canada is invaded 3 times in this map and not once goes to war over it.— Trevor Gould (@Trevor Gould)1581519386.0
@TrevGould On-brand— Craig Calcaterra (@Craig Calcaterra)1581519409.0
@stillnfac @craigcalcaterra @TrevGould I'm French Canadian. Please take Alberta.— Renaud 和彦 Lepage (@Renaud 和彦 Lepage)1581530368.0
And that whole thing about the Dakotas had people scratching their heads...
@cybik @stillnfac @craigcalcaterra @TrevGould We already have two Dakotas, all full up here bud.— theurge14 (@theurge14)1581530552.0
But Anna herself quickly put this all to rest.
Update: https://t.co/Kh2zYSEoQb— Craig Calcaterra (@Craig Calcaterra)1581521031.0
@craigcalcaterra/Twitter
Well, that's that.
Anna is our Queen now and that's the end of it.
@craigcalcaterra And a child shall lead them.— drmagoo (@drmagoo)1581521085.0
Long may she reign over Long Chile and all eastward territories from sea to shining East Virginia, or whatever.
The latest story to take the subReddit TIFU (Today I F'd Up) by storm, titled "TIFU by holding in my sneeze," is a doozy. A messy, even gory doozy.
It comes to us via LivinCrazy, who was having a bit of a challenging day at work. While eating their lunch, Living Crazy did that thing where you somehow, accidentally, basically punch yourself in the face?
Or as they eloquently put it:
"...I went like brain dead for half a second and I lifted my hand up too fast and hit my nose with an uppercut Mortal Kombat style."
Yep. Been there. Not cute, not fun.
The situation was further complicated by the fact that LivinCrazy was also under the weather, which obscured the severity of the beating they dealt themself.
"I felt like my nose was bleeding but I dismissed it as my nose running since I have a cold."
You see where this is going, right?...
Brace yourself.
So LivinCrazy goes on about their day.
Their boss asks them to pick him up lunch, so they go grab him a hamburger.
And as they're on their way into the boss's office...
"I felt a little sneeze sensation up in my nose but I try to hold it in because my boss is waiting for me."
And then, it happens—the sneeze.
But not just any sneeze...
I walk into his office, give him his hamburger and this point my body can't hold it. Cue three very bloody and harsh sneezes all over my bosses white shirt, paperwork, and hamburger.
The biggest "yikes" to end all yikeses—all the grossness of a regular sneeze PLUS you've made the entire place look like a murder scene. The mind—and the stomach—truly reels.
Thankfully, LivinCrazy's boss—after sending LivinCrazy home, thank God—took it all in stride.
"...he seems to have found it a little funny so I don't really feels as bad."
Which is pretty much the best-case scenario when you sneeze blood all over your boss and his stuff.
Three times.
Of course, LivinCrazy's fellow Redditors had plenty to say about this nasal massacre.
"This is how a pandemic starts in the movies." --u/elcondormagnificente
I'm laughing so hard right now at the image of blood spraying out of your nose 3 times like a shotgun blast --u/Finnish-Karelian
"Never hold in a sneeze, always let them out! Sneezing is such a freeing sensation!" --u/Lima1998
"That tingly air is gonna find its way out, some way or another." --u/DK_Son
"You got off light. You could have shi* your pants." --u/sbeesp
"I figured you were going to say you did what I've done in the past. I've completely throws out my back/shoulder a few times from holding in a sneeze." --u/joleme
"I think the one living crazy is your boss, if someome [sic] sneezes blood all over me I'd be freaking out running to the next clinic/hospital or whatever to check for any deseases [sic] and not wait for another clean shirt lol" --u/Iago4400
"Your boss totally thinks you did a lot of cocaine." --u/johnnyutah0305
"I would be mortified but the outcome seems to have been alright." --u/expiredgatorade
So the moral here is listen to your body and let those sneezes fly.
But as more than one fellow Redditor pointed out...
"...It doesn't matter if you are at a rave or at home all alone like you will be for the rest of your life: COVER YOUR UGLY-AS* FACE WHEN YOU SNEEZE!" --u/itsthreeamyo
God gave you elbows for a reason.