Some people just can't take a joke.
While we often find ourselves making sarcastic remarks amongst our inner circles, which are usually taken in stride, the same type of humor doesn't always go over quite as well with everyone.
Some might not see the humor in it and are easily hurt or offended.
In some cases, they might even get downright angry, making you realize all too late that this is the type of person you should never f**k with under any circumstance.
In these cases, people might have learned too late, but thankfully there are often some pretty telltale signs of when you are in the presence of someone you should never f**k with under any circumstances.
Redditor FourLeafArcher was curious to people's recommendations of which of these signs to look out for, leading them to ask:
"What is a dead giveaway someone is not to be f**ked with?"
Just Don't Risk It. Ever...
"If you can't tell by looking, it's best not to f**k with anyone."- gregariousnatch
Don't Let Their Focus Fool You
"1000 yard/ disassociated stare."
"Especially when in a confrontation."
"That person is not all there and when they go they will GO."- OGschtinkie
Not As Tough As He Thought He Was
"Dude I used to work with who was absolutely massive got punched really hard once on a night out, unprovoked."
"He simply looked at the dude, smiled a wide genuine grin & said 'why would you do that man?'"
"The guy who hit him did not try for a second punch."- jinxsays
Punch You Oh No GIF by GritTVGiphyLighting A Match Around Spilled Gas...
"When they try to diffuse the situation instead of talking sh*t."- SeenY64
It's All In Their Carriage
"There's just a way that some people carry themselves."
"As a tiny nerd in 8th grade I accidentally became friends with a 7th grader from a very rough background."
"That was the moment I stopped being bullied, and my buddy genuinely never did a thing."
"I knew he was involved in some horrific violence, but in the time we spent together, he never put his hands on anyone."
"Basically the moment he turned to the offending person and assumed *that* posture and *that* stare, the argument was over."
"So I remembered that for ever, and now whenever I see people carry themselves like that I assume they're hardcore."- curmudgeonpl
Tactical Avoidance
"The biggest giveaway for me has always been someone looking around in a situation where they are about to have to fight."
"A person in their face yelling or posturing at them, and they aren't looking at that person at all."
"But are instead looking over them or around past them."
"That is someone who is about to f*ck another person up."
"If you are ever mad at someone, or shouting at someone, and they start looking past you, behind you, or to the sides, you are about to get f*cked up."- GeneralDisturbed
looking history channel GIF by Endemol BeyondGiphySize Doesn't Matter
"Never f*ck with the small bouncer."
"The big guys got hired because they’re big and intimidating."
"The little guy got hired because he’ll f**k you up."- shandragon
When In Doubt, Be Kind
"Spent a large chunk of my teenage years in juvenile correctional facilities and getting into stupid sh*t."
"Between age 14 - 20 I had been in more fist fights than some UFC fighters (quantity not quality)."
"I have nerve damage in my hands and they get stiffer and clumsier as I get older, had to pick up painting miniatures to keep fine motor control."
"I have tattoos to cover the scars at work (IT job)."
"With that I have learned:"
"1: Loud guys are soft guys. They want to be loved and accepted, but start sh*t out of fear they’ll be rejected or as a reaction to rejection."
"2: Cauliflower ear." They probably know what they’re doing.Avoid unless you’re a seasoned fighter or also know what you’re doing."
"3: Smart guys.They might not be the fastest or strongest, but they’ve learned the kinetics of fighting - momentum, balance, and gravity. 1 kid kept a hand towel near him at all times and used it in a fight and almost killed another kid once (caught his arm when he swung, wrapped, twisted, and flung him into a toilet and gave him a concussion)."
"4: Guys that walked slow and never broke eye contact. They weren’t afraid of anything and more often than not had a high pain tolerance. Usually pretty quiet."
"5: bulky/muscular guys aren’t always 'good fighters'. But if they caught you lacking - it was lights out."
"Most importantly though - I learned you don’t f*ck with anybody."
"The wirey funny guy always cracking jokes could be the one take you out of your shoes."
"And, some people can just snap."
"The guy that gets f*cked with can be the one that pops and that adrenaline rush gave the burst of strength to suplex you into a concrete bench."
"Be kind to everyone until you’re forced to not be so kind."- Vadersbff
Be Nice GIFGiphyThey Look Bruised And Beaten For A Reason
"Hands."
"You look at the hands."
"If the knuckles are all chewed up on a big set of meat hooks that dude has punched quite a few things and people."
"Also never fight stupid people."
"They don't know when to stop."
"They will just keep pounding your face until its mush."- punchinthelunch
Beware The Strong Silent Types...
"Those quiet people have a lot bottled up."
"They’ve been through it all in life."
"Don’t be the one to open it up."- Appropriate-Ad-2068
Calm Under Pressure
"Never f*ck with the person who is calmly minding their own business while everyone is freaking out/highly tense."
"That person’s seen some sh*t."
"Conversely, you shouldn’t f*ck with someone who is seemingly nervous in a calm situation."
"They have also seen some sh*t."
"I remember seeing this girl, she was a high-strung mess of a person, who just wanted to sit alone for lunch and chill by herself."
"She literally went to eat outside during the winter bc the boys kept messing with her and picking on her."
"At some point one of the guys tried to grab her arm, and I kid you not, she turned around and automatically beat the sh*t out of him."
"Didn’t miss a beat, and this dude was allegedly sent to the hospital."
"Happened years ago in middle school."
"She was always a nervous wreck, but since then, no one messed with her."- rzrbladess
Sucker Punch Fight GIF by Back to the Future TrilogyGiphyMost Idioms Come From A Place Of Truth
"Usually quiet, calm when confronted."
"The phrase 'the loudest one in the room is the one who is scared the most' is usually true."- Boringdad25
When push comes to shove, and as many people above have noted, it's never a particularly wise decision to f**k with anyone.
Whether or not they possess the telltale signs.
"Hiring managers of Reddit: What makes you immediately throw out a résumé?"
Not In It For The Long Run
"I once received an application from a man in his 60s."
"Solid CV, lots of experience."
"In his cover letter he wrote 'I'm applying because the Job Centre asked me to'."
"Please note that I intend to retire in 6 months time'."
"We had a good laugh, then sent him a very polite rejection letter and wished him a great retirement."-BeerPoweredNonsense
Season 1 Lol GIF by NBCGiphyMake Sure They Actually Get The Right Document...
"One time I had someone upload how to upload their resume from Dropbox instead of their resume."- rabidwhale
Always Proof Read!
"I'll usually still interview unless there is no relevant experience, but I've seen some atrocious resumes."
"I've seen people use crutch words like 'uh' in writing for a job description."
"I've also seen a sentence 4 lines long with zero punctuation."
"The same resume will have 'attention to detail' as a skill set."
"I've interviewed for one of those resumes, and the applicant said 'I dunno" to about 80% of my questions, and it turned out he didn't even know what job he applied for'."
"It's not that I'm overly picky, but if someone can't spend the 20 minutes or less that it takes to proof read their resume, are they going to put a lot of effort into their job?"
"Maybe, but it's hard to know."- ChristyM4ck
Read Book Club GIFMake Sure It's Legible
"The only time I have ever had to throw out a resume was because someone possibly had it in a bag with their lunch and the paper was soaking wet and dissolving as I tried to unfold it."
"It was just unacceptable to process."
"The application was left in a drop box so I don’t know if it was a prank or an actual applicant."- 416unknown
Unprofessional Email Address
"Back in 98 I asked a new group of hires at GIECO to write their email addresses on a list that was passed around."
"Remember email was kinda new back then.. "
"One young female employee's email address included 'mybaldc**tchie'."- catjugglinpimp
the messengers aol GIFNever Send Someone In Your Place
"It’s been a long time but I used to do hiring for a cinema."
"Staff were often young, for many it was a first job, making popcorn and selling tickets type of gig."
"I would not pursue anything where parents came in with a CV for their teenager or if parents were contacting me on behalf of their teen."
"Big red flag."
"Either their kid didn’t want he job in the first place or they’re incapable of taking initiative and it doesn’t bode well for how they’d be as an employee."- FigJamAndCitrus
"Having your parents submit your resume while you stand silently beside them."- krim2182
It's Pure, Dumb Luck!
"I remember a meme or maybe a tv skit from a while back."
"The hiring manager had a huge pile of resumes on his desk."
"Someone asked how he was going to sift through them all."
"He took 2/3rds of the pile, threw them in the trash, and remarked 'I don't hire unlucky people'."
"Lol."- SpecialSpite7115
Im Out Breaking News GIF by Homes.comGiphyAll About The Formatting
"This doesn’t matter 100% of the time but bad formatting."
"If it’s hard to read I probably won’t read it."- Far-Gain-3081
Depends On The Job
"If it's a professional position, significant spelling errors will make me pass on a resume."
"If it's a warehouse job or something, I'm less concerned."- staffsargent
Don't Treat It Like A Text Message!
"Former hiring manager here."
"I tossed MULTIPLE resumes that used text message abbreviations throughout the resume and cover letter and one that included emojis."
"While you can do pretty much anything from your phone, it doesn’t mean you should."- spectacularuhoh
text texting GIF by Fifth HarmonyGiphyChoose Your References Wisely
"Not me, but a friend who checks resumes/CVs had a belter."
"Candidate had a conviction and his reference was his friend 'Baz'."- LexiRae24
Make Sure You Have The Relevant Skills
"I know it’s pretty specific but If your looking for a scheduling job make sure you know how to use Excel and clearly state it on your resume."
"It will probably get thrown out otherwise."- LoyalPlanets
As stated before, no two hiring departments will have exactly the same prerequisites and red flags, so no matter how hard you work, your resume is never going to please everyone.
That being said, multiple misspellings and a cheeky e-mail address are a surefire guarantee of not pleasing anyone.
Redditor kk-sahinul wanted to chat about the jobs that make the money not worth it, so they asked:
"What profession do you find unhealthy?"
I worked as a waiter. That's all I say.
Heavy lifting...
construction GIFGiphy"Construction, breathing in all kinds of dust all day, working in weird positions, heavy lifting, loud, dangerous tools and so on."
thatsoneuglybaby
On the Road Again...
"I imagine trucking comes with a lot of problems."
Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
"My grandfather was a trucker his whole life, he started his own business and raised 3 kids off of trucking. It killed him."
"Sleep deprivation, sitting still for 10+ hours at a time, an endless stream of black coffee and later energy drinks to stay alert, eating nothing but fast food and truck stop fare."
"And even when he was 'home,' the phone rang non-stop, usually brokers asking him to run another load from VA to CA."
"And to top it all off, he would be gone for weeks at a time, missing significant chunks of his children’s lives. And all of this, just to enjoy retirement for 2 years before dying of total kidney failure."
ChallengeLate1947
Toxic
"Welding, did that for 15 years. Breathing in toxic fumes all day sneeze into a kleenex and it would be black."
Consistent-Panic-996
"My dad was a welder and after retiring got lung cancer and caught it early, but lost part of a lung. Luckily my husband is a lawyer and has a friend that does personal injury lawyer specializing in asbestos so my dad has been getting settlements from over a dozen companies. The companies were required to put $ in a fund for settlements."
ketomachine
Too Much
"EMT. Those hours are unbelievable."
Jrk16
"Why are 24 hour shifts so common in medicine? There is ample evidence that mental performance declines over even an 8 hour shift, let alone 24hrs. Seems that of all professions this is one where you'd want everyone to be sharp and fresh as much as possible."
Johnny_B_GOODBOI
"And the lack of sleep, the caffeine intake, the trauma, the assaults, the gas station food."
austinh1999
The Fields
couple dancing GIFGiphy"Farmers. My dad was exposed to toxic herbicides/pesticides and his doctors attributed his terminal stomach cancer to his decades of exposure."
username987654321a
"And that doesn’t even get into the insanely dangerous machinery they work with. I’ve read some real horror stories about guys getting caught in equipment and that’s all, folks."
kittyness02
Farmers are necessary. But not fun apparently.
Chronic
Doctor Hospital GIF by LCLGiphy"Healthcare workers, chronic lack of sleep due to understaffing, potentially combative patients, various communicable diseases, sometimes threats from patients/their families."
HollyRoller66
Shaken & Stirred
"Bartending. There are so many alcoholics on both sides of the bar you become friends with. It can be difficult to keep yourself in check."
Mowings1
"I bartended for 10 years. Stopped almost exactly a year ago and while I loved being in that industry, getting out made me realize that drinking almost every day and doing drugs just to keep being able to handle those crazy weekend shifts wasn’t as fun as I justified it to be in my head. LOL."
freakybe
Not Safe
"Bouncer/Security. In my younger days I spent time as a bouncer, bar-back, and concert security. Nothing like having a drunken a** take swings at you for trying to do your job. Or getting blind-sided by a beer bottle to the head, etc. 100% not a long term sustainable role."
Toxikfoxx
Hazards
"Service work. Healthcare & K-12 teaching particularly. Medicine sucks due to inept healthcare & residency. My mother’s a teacher - overworked, underpaid."
Saint2th
"Where I am the schools are filled with lots of environmental hazards that really are unsafe to work around let alone have kids at everyday (mold, asbestos etc) it's unreal."
"People turn a blind eye or say it's not there but I grew up exploring every corner of that big old school... it's there. My mom was a teacher for four decades, got a different rare cancer 2x. The second one killed her. Underpaid is an understatement."
Bureaucrat_hell-loop
All of Us...
"Pretty much any job you don't like doing, which seems to be most for the majority of people. Forcing yourself to get up everyday to go do a job you hate just so you can break even at the end of the month."
chickadeedeedee_
Do what you love. If you can. And perhaps try to avoid some of these whenever possible.
Do you have any jobs to add? Let us know in the comments below.
Redditor Complete-Sweet5222 wanted to discuss the menu, so they asked:
"What is the most overrated cuisine?"
I won't do french cuisine. No snails. No way.
That's just me.
Fancy Schmancy
Chrissy Teigen Cupcake GIF by Billboard Music AwardsGiphy"Fancy cupcakes. Every ‘designer’ cupcake I’ve had has been incredibly dry. I just don’t get why they charge $5-$10 per serving, but the quality of the cake is below a Walmart sheet cake."
ThoseArentCarrots
"I make cupcakes sometimes. Over baking and day old baked products tend to dry out. A lot of the fancy desserts take time to build, which means the cupcakes have been sitting out for a while."
Stinkerma
Shock
"Not really a cuisine per se, but ‘shock food.' You know those giant milkshakes with whole slices of cake and candy on top, or quadruple cheeseburgers with so much cheese it’s running everywhere. It’s just not practical/tasty and really only exists to get a cool picture."
viillanelles
"I made the mistake of getting one of those milkshakes exactly once. It was fun to get and then you realize you just paid 20 bucks for a normal milkshake and grocery store sheet cake."
ceigetank
Be Simple
"Complicated burgers. Some a good but others have far to much on to eat without disassembly or using a knife and fork."
MedicalUprising
"Also I hate when they have overly elaborate names. I want to verbally order a cheeseburger, not the ‘big wet sloppy double daddy burger.'"
Guava_
"I totally agree. I hate being embarrassed to order something. There used to be an ice cream shop that had funky names for sizes. I had to stop going because I could not stop giggling at having to say 'no, I don’t want a zinger, I would like a zooper.”
bakay138
Premiums...
"Our family has been restaurant investors for 40 years. High end French cuisine using offal or organ meats."
"These dishes are pushed because the costs of these types of meats are very low and produce a huge profit margin. Also, the lack of experience with guests cooking these types of dishes for themselves mean very few patrons complain about authenticity. Usually a chef will throw his/her twist in the menu."
"Most customers can tell the difference between a great pizza and a mediocre one. They'll remember a great steak - but a restaurant may be paying huge premiums to fly that Waygu in from Japan or for your Flintstone tomahawk. Whereas, a local butcher shop will gladly unload offal and such with glee due to low demand. You'd be surprised as to how little we paid for cow brains for example."
rayrayrayray
No Silver?
gold GIFGiphy"Gold-flaked cuisine."
bushbeanbuddy
"God, why did it take me so long to realize you were talking about literal flakes of gold? I read this three times and thought, 'What a weird way to describe fried food.'"
bygollyollie
Gold is meant to spend not eat.
Price Point
Excited Winnie The Pooh GIFGiphy"The most expensive dishes. 'Yeah, man these diamonds sautéed in truffle oil and emerald dust are good, but do you have a cheeseburger?'"
gmen_forever
For All...
“'Something for everyone' restaurants. Anywhere where the menu has a ridiculously extensive offering. If I’m flipping multiple pages and not even halfway, I just know everything is about to taste questionable."
low_power_mode
"Several of my local Mexican restaurants have 8-page menus. All the dishes use some combination of tortillas, cheese, peppers, onions, avocados, beans, chicken, and beef, it's just the proportions and presentation that differ from one to another!"
MatttheBruinsfan
Pork Scents
"No cuisine, but I am sick of the whole 'bacon life' meme. It was funny for a couple of decades, but enough already. Bacon 'flavored' anything is disgusting."
SirReal_Realities
"One time in college I ordered bacon flavored popcorn."
"When I popped it in the communal microwave it smelled so awful that we had to open all the windows and evacuate until it had aired out enough for us to Febreze the rest away. It tasted like death. A couple guys threatened to beat me up if I popped any more. Some things just don't need to be bacon flavored. Popcorn is one of them."
Waffle_Maestro
Portions
"Rather than pick on a specific nationality or style of cuisine I'll talk about presentation."
"Any restaurant where portion sizes get smaller as the price goes up is the very height of epicurean pretentiousness. Like if they actually serve you enough food to be satisfied, it might as well be McDonald's."
"I spent a lot of years working in restaurants, and the ironic thing is what's on your plate is by far the smallest expense in serving that plate to you. There's no reason for tiny portions other than pretentious do*chebaggery."
McFeely_Smackup
Shrimp Then?
"Lobster. It’s fine, it’s just not really worth it’s cost imo. I also like eating it in things rather than by itself. The lobster rolls I had in Maine were much better than lobster straight up."
babythrottlepop
Food should be more affordable.
Do you have and foodie quibbles you'd like to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.