
People With Deceased Parents Admit What They Wished They Had Done Together
[rebelmouse-image 18358307 is_animated_gif=Losing anyone if life is a difficult thing to go through, especially if its a parent. When your time is cut short with those you love, you begin to feel like some things have gotten pushed aside before you had the chance to share them. Life is short and it's important to prioritize what is truly important.
IUsedToHateVeggies asks:
People who've lost a parent, what is something you wish you'd done before you ran out of time?
This might inspire you to seize the moment and connect with those you love.
Time is so precious that every moment matters
[rebelmouse-image 18358308 is_animated_gif=Honestly. Everything.
Even with what I did manage to do before my daddy passed, it still wasn't enough.
I was 28 when my dad was diagnosed with cancer. He passed October 31, 2002, 1 year and 8 days after his diagnosis.
We knew it was terminal. So we did everything he wanted. Everything we wanted.
We had time to say goodbye. And time to be at peace with it.
But even now, 16 years later, not a day goes by where I don't have a moment where I wish I could call my daddy and tell him about something that is entirely mundane.
I miss him dearly.
Make time for mom
[rebelmouse-image 18358309 is_animated_gif=My Mom died suddenly while I was away at college. I thought I was a pretty good daughter to her but now that I am an adult I wish I had done more. I really wish I had spent more quality time with her . As a teenager I loved going out with friends and boyfriends but she adored when I wanted to do something, anything with her. I wish I had chosen her more frequently. I never truly appreciated her and all she tried to do for us until I had my own children. I miss you Mom!
Grudges are a waste of your precious time
[rebelmouse-image 18358310 is_animated_gif=Really the best advice I can give is to not take any time for granted. You wouldn't believe how suddenly they can be gone. Love easily and don't hold grudges.
Tell them how you feel
[rebelmouse-image 18347587 is_animated_gif=My dad died suddenly in a car crash.
I wish I could have said "I love you" a lot more. It's true, we don't say it enough, but most importantly we don't say it like we mean it.
The last time I saw him he dropped me off at the bus station and in the hurry of the moment we hugged and he said "I love you my darling princess" and I quickly said "yeah, me too" I closed the car door and something in me said "say it like you mean it" I looked back again and said "Dad, I love you" It took me less than 10 seconds, but it came from the heart, and he knew it, he smiled and said "thank you" that was the last time I saw him.
I wish I would have spend more time with him instead of with my friends, that I would have listened to him more instead of ignoring his parental advice, and I wish I would have said "I love you" more, coming from the heart.
Play cards and ask about views on life
[rebelmouse-image 18358311 is_animated_gif=My mom died when I was 16. So I always knew her as a mom, she was so loving and caring towards us kids
I just wish I had gotten to know her as a person. I never got to know her views on the world because I wasn't smart enough to wonder about those things when I was younger.
That and just played cards with her when she asked.
Some never get to say goodbye
[rebelmouse-image 18345173 is_animated_gif=My Father and Mother both passed within two weeks of each other in October. My father passed in his sleep, I had just talked to him that day. My mother was being put on hospice the morning my father passed, two weeks and she followed him.
If there was anything I wish, it would of been to say goodbye to my father. I did get to spend many nights with my Mother just before she passed talking and saying goodbye.
Keep in touch
[rebelmouse-image 18358312 is_animated_gif=my dad passed away suddenly a couple years ago.
don't fall out of touch with your parents. even if you don't speak to them, know where they are and how to reach them if possible. the day my dad died I couldn't have called him if I wanted to.
Reflect on the past with them
[rebelmouse-image 18358313 is_animated_gif=Spent the time digitizing all dad's USAF photos, and getting stories to go with them. 30 years active duty and another 12 civil service... Lots of imagery on 8mm, 35mm slides, and 35mm film.
Get to know them
[rebelmouse-image 18349866 is_animated_gif=almost ten years since my dad passed, and it wasn't til after he was gone that I realized I didn't know the first real thing about him. hell, I used to buy him shaving cream for father's day cause I didn't know what else he'd want and it seemed like a 'dad' thing.
Hold onto the good memories
[rebelmouse-image 18358314 is_animated_gif=I was 13 (22 Now) My dad was diagnosed with liver cancer and a month later December 9 2009 I believe was supposed to be his chemo start, he passed away that night. He was in a coma for about a week before that, and even his brain became damaged, I wish I could have told him I loved him, and that I'd take care of my mom and younger brother before he was unable to even recognize me anymore.
He was an amazing human being, sometimes he was too perfect, he did everything to get his family settled in Canada. I guess it's my turn to carry on and hopefully he can see that I'm trying. But even til this day, it's hard to move past the thought of him, I recently went though some old videos on a camcorder, I had almost forgot how he smiled and even how he sounded. It was nice to be able to see and hear him.
Gratitude is the best thing to share
[rebelmouse-image 18358315 is_animated_gif=My grandmother was my parental figure she adopted myself and my siblings when we were young, she was diagnosed with terminal cancer in November of 2016 and passed January of 2017 and I just wish I had been able to tell her how truly grateful I am and how blessed I was for all the things she did for me growing up and how proud I was that she molded me into the strong minded and kind hearted person I am, there's not a day goes by where I don't recall one of her many pearls of wisdom she taught me or a fond memory we shared, I wear her gold Celtic band every day and refuse to take it off
Learn from their stories
[rebelmouse-image 18358316 is_animated_gif=He wasn't my biological father, but he was the closest thing I had, so I'm counting it.
I wish I would have listened to his stories more. He had one about delivering sound equipment to the Grateful Dead and I barely remember what he said. He had terminal brain cancer, so he wasn't totally able to communicate in his last few months, but he was able to listen and understand what was happening for the most part. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to visit him due to him living eight hours away, but I did send a letter basically pouring my guts out and his wife read it to him. At least I got that stuff off my chest before he went.
Learning as much as possible before it's too late
[rebelmouse-image 18345967 is_animated_gif=I wish I could have interviewed my dad, or literally spend a whole weekend with him or something, just having him tell me the entire story of hisnlife to the best of his knowledge. He died at 53 when I was 27, and I barely knew anything about his life before he had me. After his death, I gradually found out through his friends and family that he was basically me. We essentially made all the same life choices and mistakes. I wish i could have known more about him, now that I view myself as his "reboot"
It goes both ways. Now is the time to express your love
[rebelmouse-image 18345853 is_animated_gif=I lost my mom when I was 9 so basically everything. My dad is a damn a superhero for raising me solo but there's really no replacing a mother in a daughters life... it's been almost 20 years and I'm still coming up with stuff where I think "sure wish I had a mom to bounce this idea off of". We'll never get to go get our nails done together, gossip about family drama over mimosas, talk about men or life things... I'll never be able to call and announce my engagement, have a mom at my bridal shower, complain about my future husband.... I don't get the mothers wisdom, advice or nurturing.
Mamas, show your daughters how much you love them every single day. Daddies (especially you superstar single daddies), try to remember every girl, no matter how tough, is a sensitive flower sometimes.
Your parents are individuals too!
[rebelmouse-image 18358317 is_animated_gif=Get to know them.
Like, really know them.
Also do all the dumb shit kids do with parents. But that's basic. Lost my ma at 14, three years ago - way too often there's a parent's meeting that just saddens me thinking about it.
Mom went through chemo for two years, and I just honestly wish I would have asked her how she felt about it all. Let her cry. What she loved during when she was younger, what her favourite food was, color, favourite way to shuffle cards. Stupid shit my dad can't possible remember all himself.
Nothing is more important than relationships
[rebelmouse-image 18358318 is_animated_gif=My Father, my girlfriend, and I all lived together splitting bills for awhile. Had some personal issues and ended up moving to our own place. Dad ends up moving out of state. Three months later he dies in a car wreck with a BAC of .43. I know it's illogical but I can't stop thinking I could have changed something. Maybe if I had stuck out the personal s*** that made us part ways. That was three years ago. I was 20.
Learn about where you come from
[rebelmouse-image 18358319 is_animated_gif=Learned more about the family history. Had more time to revisit places/people together. Resolved petty differences/habits that blocked deeper connection/understanding.
More hugging
[rebelmouse-image 18358320 is_animated_gif=not a blood parent but he pretty much raised me.
I wish I'd hugged him more... the last time I saw him, it was soooooo obvious he was planning to kill himself but I was only 12 and I didn't know.
Maybe if I had hugged him tighter, he'd still be here :(
Don't pass up the little moments
[rebelmouse-image 18358321 is_animated_gif=My dad passed away days before my 18th Birthday, no warnings or indication. He asked me to pick him a few films to watch and pick a pizza for him. Kingdom of Heaven, the Running Man and Ghost and a Spicy Mexican deeppan. I was staying at a friend's house that night and woke up in the night at threeish with an overwhelming feeling of dread. I woke later at 6 to find a voicemail from my mum saying he was dead in between sobs.
I wish that I'd stayed home and joined him for movie night. I wish he was going to see me graduate graduate in two months. I wish my last words had been "I love you Dad." rather than "your pizza will be half an hour, I'll see you in the morning."
Sometimes I really envy people who get a chance to say goodbye properly. Other times I feel that that might be worse as they can have to watch their loved ones wither or suffer.
It's the small things you miss the most
[rebelmouse-image 18358322 is_animated_gif=My dad was real ill for a long time before he passed and because of his mental state deteriorating due to his illness, he developed habits and routines that got irritating to be around. We all tried our best and besides the occasional explosion of frustration we knew it was his illness. Anyway, looking back now it all seems so insignificant compared to not having him. I know he's at peace and he's better off, but God what would I do to go back and make him feel appreciated for the younger years when he was a full time dad and a damn good one at that. I wish I'd spent more time around him in his last few months and spent more time talking to him and just communicating.
The sucky thing is with this stuff is that you always think you have more time and finish up taking the small things for granted, but it's always the small things you miss most.
When it comes to electing a leader, the choice is an easy one if a potential candidate shares the same values as yours.
And while a candidate is fit to lead remains to be seen, we rely on our instinct to choose someone with whom we can relate.
But sometimes, our options are limited and we inevitably go with someone who is the lesser of two evils.
Curious to hear from strangers online about a hypothetical, Redditor Cashmeresquid2309 asked:
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for an openly Atheist presidential candidate? Why or why not?"

Redditors were quick to point out the answer was a no-brainer.
We Already Know The Answer
"Asking Reddit if they'd vote for an atheist..."
"I feel like the answer would be obvious."
– sarahmagoo
Sci-Fi Analogy
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for a Star Wars fan who heckin loves doggos?"
– WitnessChemical
For The Atheists In The Crowd
"Atheists of atheistville, would you vote for an open atheist?"
– nixcamic
Others weighed in with a range of opinions.
About 45
"What's funny is how many of them would probably say no, even though they voted for Trump and would do so again. Say whatever else you want about him, but I seriously can't understand how anyone could genuinely believe Trump is a Christian. He's so obviously faking it and is undoubtedly the most atheistic president we've ever had or are likely to have for a long time."
"This is a guy who's never even so much as read the Bible or attended church, who told a conservative radio host his favorite Bible verse was 'an eye for an eye', who told evangelical interviewers that he's never asked God for forgiveness because he's never done anything wrong, and who routinely commits all 7 deadly sins (pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony and sloth) without remorse."
– empfindsamkeit
From A Different Perspective
"Not an american but interestingly according to this survey on 1006 people from 2007, being atheist was the worst thing you could be as a candidate (of the things asked) with only 45 % of people saying they'd vote for one."
– ilovecatfish
An atheist candidate isn't necessarily a big strike.
Double Negative
"I wouldn’t not vote for someone just because they were atheist."
– HabitualEnthusiast
Credibility First
"This is it. If they’re running on platforms I support with a history to back up those campaign promises, I don’t care if they belong to the church of the flying spaghetti monster. They could literally be a member of the satanic temple and I, an actual practicing Christian, would give less shi*s than a constipated sloth."
"Edit: yes, I realize the Satanic Temple does not actually worship satan. I used it for that purpose. The Church of Satan has some…problematic views and I probably would not vote for someone who literally holds a platform of eugenics."
– Phoenix_of_Asclepius
Some view the role of religion in politics as important.
It Depends
"Religion can be relevant: I would have strong reservations about voting for a Scientologist, even if I agreed with the policies they proposed. I would have strong reservations voting for a member of an apocalyptic cult or, possibly worse, a follower of the (highly heretical) 'prosperity gospel,' which unfortunately includes more and more so-called 'evangelicals' — I didn't vote for George W. Bush, but it's not because he was an evangelical."
"It depends on the role: I'd probably be more flexible with a legislator than an executive (mayor, governor, president), as their character is IMO more important than for a legislator and their policy stances somewhat less important relative to a legislator."
"Satanic temple — well, that's just an organized group of atheists and humanists with an intentionally inflammatory choice of name. They're generally fine people."
– alyssasaccount
A Bad Rap
"The Satanic Temple is an excellent organization that every decent person should be able to respect. A Church of Satan member, not so much."
"There's a huge difference between them!"
– StarsEatArtBooks
And Redditor boganvegan said it best.
"Better an open atheist than a fake Christian."
It all boils down to trustworthiness. Without full transparency, how could anyone put their faith in a candidate who spews nothing but lies?
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Being home alone isn't always the most tranquil thing.
No one is there to help or protect you.
And things that go "bump" in the night... sometimes they do more than bump.
Redditor ag9910 wanted to hear about the times home felt like an unsafe place to be. They asked:
"What is the scariest, strangest, most unexplainable thing that has happened to you while home alone?"
I'm always freaked out when I'm home alone. Lights on. Yeah, my electric bill is high.
Dorothy?
"I dreamed the front door blew open at the exact time the house alarm went off... I hopped up and sure enough, the front door was open. No intruder."
fatowl
I See You
"Not home alone but only one in right side of the house. Went to my mom's bathroom to wash my hands and saw a pair of feet behind the half open door. Laughed and said 'very funny Ma, I see you.' then finished up and left. Bumped into my mother in the kitchen unpacking, nobody else was in the house. I'm glad whatever was behind the door didn't peek out."
SatanWithFur
“It’s Doug!”
"One night I had forgotten to lock my apartment door and woke up in the middle of the night. My bedroom door was about 2 feet from my front door, as you walked into the apartment. First a big dog ran by, then a person. Holy crap I was so scared and I screeched 'Who is it?!?!!'"
"A man said 'It’s Doug!' As I was thinking to myself, who the f**k is Doug, he said 'oh, crap.' He turned around to go back out the front door saying 'Sorry.' I asked 'Didn’t you have a dog with you?' He said 'Oh, yeah. Hey, c’mon!.' He left, his dog ran out after him and I locked my front door."
"Edit: glad you all thought this was funny, because I did too, once my heart quit trying to beat right out of my chest! The next day the girls at work thought I was crazy for not being upset, but eh, done is done. Peace!"
scarletohairy
Confused...
"My sister and I were home alone and we heard someone big running up the stairs. The stairs make lots of noise with slight pressure so when there’s someone big on them you can tell. I went out of my room to check but saw no one anywhere and my sister also came out of her room and she asked if that was me I said no and we both looked around to see if there was anyone but found no one in the whole house. We were confused and called our parents and just waited until they got back and that was that."
JtSudbury04
I See You
"I very clearly saw a guy walk into my room. But when I went after him there was nobody there. I checked in the closet, under my bed, everywhere one could hide in my room."
HighlyOffensive10
This is why home video surveillance is key.
"NO"
"My parents were on a road trip, just left, and I sat down at my desk. I thought 'Weekend alone by myself' and a voice yelled into my right ear 'NO' so loud it hurt."
Th4ab
Wild
"I managed to lock myself out of my house on my birthday during a tornado while trying to bring my cats to the basement for safety. I later found out that the tornado was approximately a couple miles or less from me at that exact time. The sky was green and it got weirdly calm and then I could hear what sounded like a train coming before I found an unlocked window to climb through. Wild times."
SilverGnarwhal
Saturday morning in the 80s...
"I wasn't home alone but I was awake by myself one Saturday morning in the 80s when I was around 7 or so. I believe my mom was the only one home because my dad went to the lake to go fishing that weekend, and I'm not sure where my older brothers were, maybe they went with him, idk."
"Anyways, my mom's sleeping in, and I'm in the living room by myself, watching Saturday morning cartoons and making a fort out of sheets and cushions. Something made me turn around and I saw my dad in his pajamas standing in the hallway entrance with his hands on his hips, looking the mess I was making and shaking his head."
"He then turned around and walked into my room, which was just off the hallway entrance. Dude. I didn't even look, I just booked it to my parents room and woke my mom up. I don't remember what happened after that, this was around 35 years ago. And yes, my dad was fine, nothing had happened to him."
smriversong
Get the Bat...
"I was at home by myself on a call with some friends when all of a sudden my dog begins to bark like crazy, which was odd since it was the middle of the night and he's usually sleep. I go downstairs to check on him and find him barking at our hall closet, terrified I grabbed my bat that I keep in my room just in case and open the door. There was nothing out of usual at first at then I look down and notice a familiar looking object at the bottom of the closet."
"It was my mom's necklace she had lost when I was 9, (i'm 15 now just to put in perspective how long it's been). I showed it to my mom at breakfast and she was just as shocked as I was. I still have no clue how it got there or how my dog knew it was in there, definitely one of the oddest occurrences of my life."
SomeRandomIdiot14
Meow
"Many years ago, I was 14 or so, my first night alone in the house when my parents were out. Lying on the living room floor reading, my cat sleeping next to me."
"Suddenly, cat wakes up, stares intently into the dark corner of the room behind me, hair on end, growls and then bolts out of the room and upstairs. I look behind me and see nothing, but follow cat upstairs and hide under the covers. Freaked me out."
LairdofWingHaven
Thank God for alarms. I hate being home alone.
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The human body is still such a mystery.
How much do we really know?
Not a lot apparently. We're learning more all the time.
And most of it is gross.
Redditor BathNo7713 wanted to discuss the ick factor of anatomy. So they asked:
"What is the most disturbing fact about the human body?"
The body freaks me out. But it's all I've got. So teach me some things.
Minutes...
"The fastest killing virus takes around 4 days to kill you. That would be Ebola. Your immune system can kill you in 15 minutes."
will477
'locked-in'
"If your brainstem (the part of the brain that mediates most motor control for all of the body) is damaged, you can get 'locked-in' syndrome. That means you're fully conscious and aware of your surroundings but unable to move or speak. The only muscles that remain unaffected in most people are the muscles that move they eyes and the eyelids."
"You're essentially trapped within your own body with your only way of communication being blinking or moving your eyes It can be caused by toxins, blockage of the basilar artery which is the main artery of the brainstem, or other brainstem damage."
4oodler
Explosions
"Some people suffer from Exploding Head Syndrome, which causes them to hear a loud bang when they wake up."
ToraMix19
"When I was younger I believe I experienced this a few times. Sounds I heard were: about a million people talking and laughing all at once, a train that irl would've been about a foot away from me based on the volume of the sound, and a door slamming loudly."
aliaisacreature
Pain
"Not sure if this is by design, but I totaled my car once, almost completely uninjured somehow. Then I looked down to my right hand which I remember jabbing into my dashboard at 55mph. Luckily (unluckily?) only my pinky took the blow. But instead of a floppy-udder full of bone-sand, my pinky was 0.5 inches long."
"Broke no bones, but instead perfectly stacked my phalanges, or finger bones, INTO my hand. This is fixed by a muscular Russian murse grabbing your pinky with both hands and pulling very hard. God I wish they gave me more lidocaine."
TelevisionOlympics
Functions
"If you have a surgery where they need to move your organs around they might not function for a day as the body assumes that they are dead."
tonythebutcher13
Move things around? You mean that's not fake when it happens on "Grey's Anatomy?"
"The only reason you are not aware of it is because the ambient noise kind of drowns it out because your ears focus on it. If you go to one of those super-silent rooms that absorb all sorts of sounds, it is a really weird way to reacquaint yourself with your body."
Black_Handkerchief
The Mouth
"Idk about the most disturbing but how bad human teeth are. We’d think it’s our sugary and processed diets these days that cause it, but even Otzi the iceman discovered in Italy was found to have terrible teeth, mouth diseases and cavities. It’s odd that even with the most basic of diets our teeth are so bad."
Dorianisconfused
In the bowels...
"I noticed this after my abdominal surgery. When I turned over in bed my guts seemed to fall from one side to the other. Mentioned to my doc and she confirmed it was my bowels rearranging themselves."
squatter_
"Apparently the doctor just throws your intestines back in there higgeldy-piggeldy because there isn't a correct way to pack them neatly."
LostDesigner9
A Quick Burst
"There are a vast number of ways that your body can malfunction and kill you with little or no warning. An aneurysm can go undetected until it bursts and kills you. Getting hit in the chest just the right way can stop your heart. You can encounter an allergen that never previously provoked an immune response that freaks out your body so badly that you die. You literally just never know if your body will just... die."
Unsolicited_Spiders
The body is such a conundrum. Sexy and gross all at once.
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Being overweight comes with numerous challenges.
And not only challenge's to one's health.
Unfortunately, overweight people are far too often a target for judgment and ridicule, often owing to misconceptions.
Even worse, sometimes simply being bigger than other people leads others to assume that they must also be less than or inadequate in general.
Redditor Rude_Guarantee_1479 was curious to hear what people felt is the worst part, or most common misconception about being overweight, leading them to ask:
"What is the worst part about being a fat person?"
Since I'm fat, I must also be stupid.
"For some reason people always assumed I was simple minded/stupid when I was obese."
"Now that I've lost weight people just talk to me like I'm a regular person."- batyablueberry.
No comfort to be had.
"Feeling uncomfortable all the time."- Keithninety.
Not being seen and always being noticed.
"I have a fear that nobody is ever going to fall in love with me because I don't feel visible and I am fat
Also, going to the pool or beach and you have to put on a swimsuit. I feel like a seal stranded on the beach.- mango_0111.
Inadequate clothes.
"My belt trying to stab me in my belly when I sit down."- jimjohn2017.
"Nothing seems to fit nicely or still look nice in your size."- OutlandishnessNo1950.
"The amount of pants you go through."- Cmonredditalready.
"Putting on a shirt, walking into the backroom, seeing how it makes me look, and then never pulling out my favorite shirt ever again."- YeaItsaThrowaway112.
Never feeling good about yourself.
"Feeling guilty while eating your favorite foods, not looking good in photos/clothes."- pissed_at_everything.
Mobility challenges.
"My thighs rubbing and chaffing."
"I'm so raw right now."- HeavyBreathin.
Unwanted nicknames.
"Not the worst part, but the most constantly sh*tty part is constantly being called 'big guy' by every kind of person other than other 'big guys'."- Professor-ish.
As the old saying goes, true beauty comes from within.
And the way someone looks should never be one's first impression.
Nor does anyone need to go through the day facing unwanted judgment when simply walking down the street.
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