Have you ever had someone ask you a question that's waaaaay TMI? And have those questions become things that have been asked of you over and over again in your life? These Redditors know that struggle, and are revealing the questions that make them grind their gears.
u/Master-Salamander asked: What is a question you wish people wouldn't ask you?
The real struggle.
'What do you do for a living?'
I got fired 6 months ago from my job and despite a few interviews and lots of applications, I'm sh*t out of luck so far. Now suddenly nearly everyone I meet is super interested in what I do for a living, I swear they would never ask that before. I hate having to tell people I'm unemployed.
Tall people probs.
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"How's the weather up there?"
My friend, who's also 6'7" responds with, "Do you play mini-golf?"
Awkward.
"What happened to your neck?" I have a big scar at my throat, had my thyroids removed because of cancer. It's never fun to tell the story and people are all like "oh sh*t, I'm so sorry" after that. Definitely a way to kill the mood!
Ignorant AND sexist.
As a single dad, I wish people wouldn't ask me about my son's mother. 9 times out of 10, they just want gossip.
My mother died when I was a child, people made idiotic assumptions about my fathers ability to parent. "Feed the kids, you know they don't eat at home", "honey do you wanna talk about girl things?", "oh what's the name of your maid? I know you can't keep a house this clean".
That's personal.
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I am married and we have one young child
"Is he going to get a brother/sister anytime soon?" ... or some other variation, especially from someone you barely know or just met.
Listen, everything about having kids is personal, from the act of procreation to the impact on your life to the financial considerations. Not to mention the feelings about it from the parents, which may not always be aligned. Like please, I told you my kid's name and how old he is, now you wanna bypass superficial acquaintance small talk and go right to deeply personal plans for our life? FOH
A tough interview question.
"Are you a felon?"
I made a mistake a few years back while defending my little sister. I have a final job interview today after a series of interviews for a web developer position and I'm absolutely dreading answering this question.
This isn't entirely the same but it is more similar than it seems. Someone was applying to work for my father and they hadn't worked for quite a long time which was why they couldn't find a job. It turned out that they had been the primary caregiver of a relative the whole time and when my father heard this he hired them on the spot. Even an employer can sympathise with someone who has sacrificed for their loved ones.
Seriously, don't ask people about this.
"When are you going to have children?" Or variations of that question.
I used to be polite and now I start talking about all of the tests and treatments we have gone through to still have no children.
Well Martha, if you didn't want to hear in detail about my ovaries and my husband's motility, why did you even ask?
I always hope it will shock them out of asking someone else such a personal and sometimes painful question.
Think before you speak.
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I've had a speech impediment since I was able to talk. I stutter on words at seemingly random times, really no specific pattern or sound, when I get nervous or pressure is really high. As a kid I couldn't string more than a few words together, but through school and into college it got much better. As an adult I really don't have many issues in normal conversation, but I absolutely hate having to introduce myself in a group setting (conference meeting, etc.). I seem to stutter on my name 90% of the time. It's pretty embarrassing.
Anyway, the question I hate is when someone asks, "Did you forget your name?" Ugh. I don't know what kind of rock they've lived under, but it completely turns me off from that person for years. Mostly it's meant to be a harmless joke, but if they'd simply put one and one together they'd realize how thoughtless the comment was.
Anyway, that's it.
Stop.
Why are you wasting your time doing [something that I enjoy doing]?
Why are you wasting time worrying about what I'm doing?
A sensitive topic.
How is everything going with the adoption process?
I put on a brave face and answer optimistically when in reality the process has not been going well. I know people are genuinely interested and don't mean harm, but it's a tough question to answer without breaking down.
Sounds like paranoia.
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"Are you a psychopath? Have you ever killed someone? Please don't kill me!"
Girl. We've been hanging out and talking together in class for months now. The people in our school are nice to me, therefore I am chill and nice with them. I have 3 friend groups and am very social with everyone. Also, why tf would I kill anyone? What benefit would I get out of killing someone? I'd feel like sh*t afterwards, so what's the point? Chill, you're worrying yourself over nothing.
You don't know their story.
"Don't you ever want to meet your real parents?"
Yes, I'm adopted. No, that does not mean I consider my parents to be my fake parents or some dumb shit. My "real" parents are the ones that have been there for me, supported me throughout my life. Not the ones that donated their genetic material.
F*ck MLMs.
If I want to be a #bossbabe and be my own boss. Or to try their new weight loss coffee. F*ck MLMs, man.
\I should also add that when people ask me if I'm feeling better today, it really pisses me off. For context, I have a couple of chronic illnesses and I am never feeling better because they will never go away, thanks for asking, Karen.
That must be infuriating.
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When I was pregnant sooo many people (almost everyone, even people I barely knew) asked me if it was planned or not and if I was happy about it. How do people not understand how deeply personal a question that is? On a superficial level you are asking me what happened while I was having sex, on a more serious level you are asking if the best thing that ever happened to me was a mistake, even insinuating that I'm too dumb to not get pregnant...
Literally one person, out of friends and family and coworkers, just said "oh congratulations!" when he (a coworker) found out. Everyone else gave me a worried look and said "are you happy about it?" Wtf?
So hypocritical.
Why is it taking you so long to graduate? And why can't you work a REAL job during grad school? F*ck you for those questions when you ask them every month or so. Grad school takes a longer time than a Bachelor degree, and takes up every moment of free time I have with research and writing. A REAL job is why I am going to grad school in the first place, and I am supplementing as much much as I can with the 3-4 jobs I have any given semester.
Then: oh you aren't gonna get paid enough right out of grad school. You better start applying to Taco Bell. From the same people too ashamed and complaining I don't have a REAL job while in grad school. Excuse me but food service is a REAL job, it just doesn't pay as much as my critics want. But now suddenly it's acceptable. From people in my family, and I'm the first to go for a graduate degree. Freaking hypocritical.