It's so easy to lie to kids. You could argue it comes from a lack of respect, taking their minds for granted and assuming they couldn't handle the truth of the situation. Or, maybe it's because you don't think what question they're asking is worth your time, so you make something up. A harmless little white lie, what's the worst that can happen?
Turns out, kids have pretty solid memories, and if you life to them they'll talk about it on the internet when they're older.
Reddit user, u/DrinkingSoup, wanted to know what you learned later on in life when they asked:
What's something stupid an adult told you as a child that you discovered was totally not true?
There Are So Many Better Years Ahead
description read GIF
Giphy
"High school is the BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!"
The hell it is. F that entire decade between 8 and 18. They're some of the most uncomfortable, challenging, and difficult years of a human life. It gets WAY better in the 20s and 30s, though still challenging in some ways.
If you "peak" at 16, you're selling yourself SO short!
Santa Doesn't Always Deliver
My uncle told me that santa would come out of the sink since I didn't have a chimney in my old house.
And that he was going to by me a ATV.
And 10,000 dollars :(
If This Were True, This Sounds Like The Beginning Of A Horror Movie
Eating watermelon seeds will lead to a watermelon growing in your stomach.
As a child, I took this pretty seriously for a while. LOL.
*stares at pile of unplayed video games
"You will play video games as much as You want when You grow up"
Think We All Heard This One
That when the backseat light in the car is switched on, the driver is legally not allowed to drive cause it is the cause of many accidents.
Ouch.
I was told my other grandma "went to china to look for her knitting."
This wasn't true, she's dead
Well, Kind Of, But, No
Everytime you run west you slow the earth's rotation a little bit and the moon moves further away.
This is actually 100% true, but the amount is so small it's like saying dropping a kool-aid packet in the ocean is going to change how it tastes.
The Sad Thing Is It Doesn't Matter Either Way
That if you leave a google window open and idling on your desktop it exclusively leaves your computer open to internet hackers
Just Don't Be High. Problem Solved.
My dad told me the vacuum would suck up my toes. I know that won't happen but I still wear slippers when I vacuum
My dad has a story about vacuuming when he was younger and he was super high, and vacuumed over his toe and the roller rolled it in and broke it, so there may be a little bit of truth here!
We're All Kind Of In The Same Boat
"Get good grades in school and you'll succeed in life?"
[deleted]
Conversely "if you don't do well in school now you'll struggle all tour life".
Jokes on them, we're all struggling regardless.
This Isn't How Vikings Are Born
homer simpson apple GIF
Giphy
that if u shave your beard grows thicker
I grew up in a salon because my mom is a stylist and this drives me insane. People try to tell me this bs all the time and when I challange them, I'm the crazy one of the group. More people believe the rumor than know the truth.
Thanks, Bro
My oldest brother (he's 21 years older than me) told me that head-lice burrowed through your scalp and into your brain, and that's why I was so stupid.. thanks bro.
You Descend From A Long Line Of Kings And Queens
My parents weren't supposed to be married so they used to tell little me that I would've been the child of either my mom and some other man or my dad and some other woman and as a kid I used to imagine one of them being my aunt or uncle instead of my parent and laugh, it wasn't until I grew up and took biology I realized I only exist because of those two specifically lmao
Why Do We Lie To Kids?
I was on a road trip and my grandparents told me that the people in the banana fields were banana benders. So one day at school I had a straight banana and I took it to my teacher and said "Mrs they forgot to bend my banana". I can only imagine what she was thinking when I explained to her what a banana bender was!
Feel Like This Is A Really Good Lesson For The GOP
Respect your elders.
I heard this all the time. I thought elders with more life experience should be respected more. Older people in families, grandparents, etc.
Right up until I was betrayed by one of these elders and I opened up my eyes to the deceit that people hold in their hearts. Face to face they're all smiles, but behind your back, they are, for fail of a better word, quite evil.
Now: your age is irrelevant to the respect that I should give you. Show me that you have a good heart, and you deserve my respect. Your respect will not be inherently given... But earned. And those people who have a good heart, do not even have to think about earning my respect, because it comes naturally through their words, actions, and general demeanor.
This Is Just Called Lying
As a kid, My dad told me his phy-ed teacher made him write a ten-page essay about his shoelaces as punishment. It must have been coercion for me to behave myself.
I asked him about it as an adult, and he had no idea what I was talking about.
Doing The Butt Bump
Thunder is the sound of two clouds bumping into each other.
My parents said it was giants throwing rocks, but they weren't being serious. I had read the Hobbit and they were referencing that. I actually knew the real answer because I liked reading the children's non-fiction section at the library.
Definitely Not How Churches Should Behave
We were guilt tripped in our church. They told us we should be able to hear God's voice. If we couldn't, we had to pray harder to remove all sin from our life.
I remember being at a 24/7 prayer camp than ran for a week. I remember sitting there for about four hours. Finally an "aide" asked me if I could hear God yet. I told him no. He said I wasn't praying hard enough and I hadn't revealed all my sins to God yet.
I was done with church after that trip.
There's A Slight Difference Between The Two
That I was smart, when in reality im just not stupid.
Sometimes, it's better to be not stupid. Less expectations.
Turns out that being smart does not equal success in any way. You are much better off being average and lucky. Just smart enough to see opportunities, that's all you need.
Kids Are Smarter Than You Think. Give Them Credit. Tell The Truth.
talking homer simpson GIF
Giphy
Why has nobody in this thread mentioned the cab light in cars? We were all told it was illegal to turn on the light.
Why do adults do this? I never knew this was so common until I joined reddit. My mom just told us it distracts her while driving and so we didn't turn on the lights. Seems simple enough
Because people are lazy and think children are inherently stupid or too rebellious to accept a simple explanation. We've had to explain a couple times to our kid that the light can't stay on because it's a distraction.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
Giphy
"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Giphy
"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
Giphy
"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
Giphy
"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
