What is in a name? It's only your main title for life. Your name is something that precedes you before you even enter a room. So you would think parents would put some extra thought into the process, especially if one has a "unique" last name. Of course over the years people have taken it upon themselves to legally change names, and that can be something even more.... special. But often times many mixture of names turn out pretty rad and with a good story.
Redditor u/Dull-Ad-6956 wanted to discuss what names maybe making the best of lists for the next decade by asking.... What Is The Coolest Name you've ever Heard?Wolfie...
s8 wolfgang GIF by netflixlat
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Used to work with a guy named Wolfgang Hellfire.
ETA: He was exactly as cool as he sounds.
Killer
I worked with a guy who had a surname Killsenemy.
Pretty straight forward not to f**k with that family. Haha.
I worked with a guy with the surname Mankiller. Might be scarier because your guy kills his enemies, this guy just kills.
Rager....
Used to work in a flower shop. Had someone order online for a large vase to be delivered in one of the richer neighborhoods. The name?
Susan Deathrage.
When I informed my mother, who works at the local bank, about this she delightfully informed me that she often helps the matriarch of the family, a very sweet little old lady named Mrs Deathrage.
JUMP
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I once met a guy who told me his name was Van Halen. I called bull crap, but then he showed me his driver's license.
The Inferno Guy....
Lt. Les McBurney, was a Firefighter giving an interview in front of a house fire.
Edit: adding article https://www.channel3000.com/overnight-house-fire-forces-family-from-sun-prairie-home/
This is called an aptonym. My favorite example: a medical examiner who performs autopsies named Dr. Posthumus.
Illuminated...
I kid you not, my kid has a boy in her class called Atlas Power.
EDIT - just asked her about him and this was her reply.
"He's so weird. Always going on about the Illuminati"
Atlas is 11yrs old.
Doubles...
The actor Patrick Kilpatrick.
If Patrick Kilpatrick kills himself and or another Patrick I am calling Time-travel on his parents.
I went to school with a guy with the same name (not the actor). Last name with 2 L's (Killpatrick) always thought it was a cool name.
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Doctor is Out....
I used to have a friend who's dad was a doctor. His name was, and I kid you not- Doctor Payne.
There's a doctor's surgery I used to go to that had the names of all doctors on the door - their full, non-diminutive names.
Dr Elizabeth Johnson. Not Liz Johnson.
Dr Michael Ramsay. Not Mike Ramsay.
Dr Jessica Xiao. Not Jess Xiao.
Well, almost all of them had their full first names.
Except one:
Dr Ron McDonald.
Saucy Reading
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The names of the authors of this paper combined, are the bomb. Sounds like they accidentally used their porn names for this publication.
Lovegrove, W. J., Bowling, A., Badcock, D., & Blackwood, M. (1980). Specific reading disability: differences in contrast sensitivity as a function of spatial frequency. Science, 210(4468), 439-440.
Platywussy
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But sometimes, the wisdom imparted by friends isn't always helpful or relevant to the situation.
Curious to hear from strangers online who could do without specific knowledge, Redditor Saibotnl1 asked:
"What life advice can just f'k off?"
These Redditors have a problem with how certain people have on outlook on life.
Time To Rest
"Sleep when you’re dead."
"Cool, but you’re going to be dead a lot sooner."
– Tag2graff
Irrelevant Sadness
"People have it so much worse than you so don’t be sad!"
– notrachelmar
"To that I like to say, 'people have it so much better than you so don't be happy!'"
– ___jupiter____
Your Life Path
"Almost anything relating to what age you must be in order to buy a house, have children, marry, have a profession, or do anything else. Seriously, everyone's life is different from everyone else's. Make your life the way you want it to be. If you so desire. Up to you."
– Frn071
On The Contrary
“Cheaters never prosper”
"Yes, they f'king do."
– waqasnaseem07
People can get out of any situation they find displeasing.
But others feel people should just "stick it out."
Ignoring Bullies
"Just ignore bullys or get someone else to handle it for you. I have never seen this work, only makes it worse. The only effective way I've seen to deal with them is by not making yourself an easy target and make them scared to f'k with you again. If going psycho on their a** is the only thing they'll respond to that's their fault. Also want to add in schools they will punish you for self defense but that punishment is only sitting around a few hours in detention or sitting around at home with a suspension. The punishment is temporary boredom, it's absolutely nothing compared to being bullied and when it's over the important message will still stand that you will not tolerate being a victim."
– User Delted
Remain to be Miserable
"Stick it out"
"Whether that's sh**ty jobs, shi**y relationships, shi**y living situations..."
"By all means don't just give up on things when you face challenges, but if something feels wrong or is wrecking your peace then take some control and change it if you can!"
– petitezoey
"Easy for you to say," might be an auto-response to these suggestions for many people.
Invitation For Recklesslessness
"Live like everyday was your last"
Yall know what people do when they learn they have a single day left to live?"
– LimeGrass619
A Possible Consequence
"I did that as a teenager and ended up homeless and addicted to heroin. Didn’t pan out for me too well."
"19 years sober though today."
– Open-Section-7263
A Practical Approach
"If I knew with certainty that I had one day left, I'd double-check all my financials, my will, and my insurance policies, make sure my wife had all of my passwords and knew where all the money was, spend the rest of the day with her and the kids, then call the medical examiner and ask to lie down on the gurney so that when I die they won't strain their back moving my remains out of my house."
– Asteriad
Nose Stuck In A Book
"Work while they sleep. Study while they party"
"That's not a recipe for success, that's a recipe for a lot of white hairs, burnout syndrome and a stroke before your 40s..."
– Khomuna
Doesn't Apply To Everyone
"Do what you love and money will follow"
"I love walking my dogs and grilling food for my friends but That sh*t doesn't pay the bills as well as my engineering degree!"
– Elons_android
While people's intentions are good, they're better off keeping their two cents in their own pockets.
Not everyone likes to hear platitudes.
Sometimes, people just want to know they're not alone with their problems over listening to unlikely solutions that are nothing more than superficial pick-me-ups.
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