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People Describe The Worst Teacher They've Ever Had

People Describe The Worst Teacher They've Ever Had
Image by TaniaRose from Pixabay

A good teacher can broaden a student's horizons and make even the most stubborn student learn. A bad teacher––and there are quite a few out there––will severely impair a student's relationship with the subject they're teaching. For example, I have had many good English and History teachers. They genuinely sparked my interest in those subjects. But I have had a number of terrible Math teachers, and I never took to the subject. (I would later take statistics in college, and while it was difficult and time-consuming, I loved the way it made me think.)

After Redditor GallopYouScallops asked the online community, "Who was the worst teacher you ever had?" people shared their stories.


"Then she has the audacity..."

My 4th-grade teacher often took away my little crafts and drawings, threw them into the trash, and told me that stuff was for kindergarteners. She also tried to suspend me for making paper claws.

Then she has the audacity to question my mom about why I was so depressed in her class.

SquishCrew

"The class was..."

Mrs. Ray (3rd grade).

The class was going to have an ice cream party IF all of the students got their timetables right. I ended up missing two as I had a really hard time memorizing information. In fact, many years later it was found that I had a math disability. Anyhow she didn't say anything, our party was scheduled and my mom sent in toppings with me to school the day of. Just before the party started she came over and told me I had missed a few of them and that I needed to go sit in the library during the party, alone. She knew that my mom was sending in toppings and demanded them, I was resistant so she had to pull my book bag from me to get them out.

So I sat alone for about 45 minutes or so in the library while all of my classmates ate ice cream using the toppings my mom provided no less. 35 years later I am STILL angry over it and now that I have kids I couldn't imagine them having to go through that. Honestly, it made me HATE math the rest of my life also. And now at over 40 I still don't know all of my tables.... and I even graduated from college.

TheOrionNebula

"Oh..."

Grade 10 math teacher. Eastern European guy with a heavy accent that was hard to understand. That alone wasn't bad, except when you asked him to repeat something, or for clarification, he'd berate you and call you stupid. At the end of the year, I failed my exam, and he literally said to me "I will pass you if you leave my class and never come back again." I never agreed to something so quickly.

Oh, and my grade 10 french teacher. She had mental breakdowns at the end of every year, and I am not exaggerating. We did s*** all in class until she had her breakdown, then we had a sub who desperately tried to teach us enough to help us pass the exam. We were graded on a curve to make up for our lack of education all year. I remember playing my DS in her class every day, didn't need to hide it or anything. She didn't give a s***. It's a shame, I actually enjoyed french as a subject up until that point, after which I was too far behind to continue.

MentallyPsycho

"I found out later..."

Mrs. Brown. I had her in year 3 (aged 7-8) and my god, she did not like me. I had been a bit of a teacher's pet throughout my earlier years so I was quite taken aback when this lady didn't like me. No matter what I did, I was finding myself in trouble. The slightest whisper to my friend, I would be in trouble, while others around me would get away with having open conversations with their tables. My work was never good enough. She even put me on an IEP (that's kind of a programme you mostly use for additional needs pupils).

My following teacher, Mrs. Harris, was lovely. Openly told me she had no idea why I had been put on an IEP in the first place and I felt myself getting back on track. By the end of the year, I somehow found myself wondering if maybe I'd been the one in the wrong with Mrs. Brown - she had been the grown-up after all so there was always a good chance it had been my fault we hadn't gotten along. But after Mrs. Harris I had Mrs Brown again and realised that no no, it was her problem after all.

I found out later that apparently, I'd met Mrs. Brown shortly before I'd started school and had had a tantrum in her presence - I guess she'd just decided I was a naughty child and it had become something of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Now that I'm a teacher myself I can understand that the way she acted was extremely inappropriate and you never use an IEP as a form of punishment. Funnily enough, her husband taught PE in the secondary school I went to and he had a school-wide reputation of being a d!ck too so I guess it was just their thing.

I try to remember Mrs. Brown when I'm teaching and make sure my pupils know that every day is a fresh start and any misbehaviours from yesterday won't affect the way they're treated today.

WelshDionysus

My high school physics teacher. I loved maths, physics, chemistry in my primary school and I was quite good at those too. But that bitch in my high school only accepted the very exact solution to any problem that she had in mind. When asked to solve any exercise or answer a question I would be ridiculed and given a bad grade if I dared to think about the problem and give my own solution. If they were two perfectly good solutions I would be damned if I used the wrong one. It was like writing 'B + A' instead of 'A + B' was enough to fail.

The result was I barely passed. I couldn't make myself learn this by just memorizing things exactly. Using any interesting knowledge sources was pointless. I hardly passed a physics course there and was not able to pass the entrance exam to the university well enough. I ended graduating something else than I wanted.

spacegardener

"One teacher..."

One teacher cussed out students multiple times and was only fired recently.

woosh12

"I'll preface this..."

I'll preface this by saying I'm autistic and required a few accommodations in school. One of those was the means of a laptop to typewritten assignments on. Some teachers were cool with it, others begrudged it. One of them Really begrudged it. She was a 70-odd-year-old woman who told me if I didn't touch-type, I wouldn't be allowed to use my laptop to write. My handwriting is very poor as is my general dexterity. She starts observing my typing during note taking and slaps my hand with her pointer stick thing. "What did I tell you about your typing?", she snapped.

So I think nothing of it. Figured, just get through this day. Three days later, note-taking again, I'm typing in my quasi-hunt-and-peck style, she slaps my hand yet again and this time says nothing. I say to her "Seriously?", and she forcefully slams my laptop shut, hands me paper and a pencil, and goes "Write. Now."

One phone call from my mother to our guidance counselor later, I'm permitted to use my laptop in that class again. At this point I dread this teacher completely and I am making more of an effort to touch-type, but it feels unnatural and i'm doing it to avoid her reaction more than anything else.

Well, a few more days go by and I'm reverting back to my natural typing style, and this time she sees it and slaps my hand with a metal ruler, which actually really hurt. And at that point, I grab the ruler out of her hand, fling it across the room and I yell "Hit me again! Hit me again!", and when I tell you this woman turned White, like, it looked as if the soul left her body.

So, pretty much every other teacher in the next 4 rooms heard that, and I was taken aside to explain to the principal what happened, and I tell him the whole situation and he calls my mom down there, who is livid at my teacher and demands my removal from that class and that teacher fired -- teacher never got disciplined, I got 3 days of suspension for calling her a bad name, but I did get transferred to another class.

This teacher retired within two years and believe me when I say Everyone was glad to see her go.

fxckbees

"For context..."

A geology teacher in primary school. Still have various forms of nightmares today and angry writing this. Never shared with anyone. I still don't know the reason she threw away my homework right in front of the whole class.

For context, she is checking homework at her desk and calling one student after another. I brought my homework to her when it was my turn. She took it and flung it across the classroom to the door. Not knowing what happened and perhaps naive and confused, i picked it up and handed it to her again. She threw it away again and yelled at me not to pick it up. I cried for the whole day.

LordSynister

One of my "history" professors from back in college. It's a small liberal arts college that averaged 900 total students yearly, and everyone who attended got placed into one of three social categories: Jock, Hippie, and Other.

Other was then divided into about a handful of subcategories, with one of the biggest groups being the LGBTQ+ Alliance members.

Enter the professor. She was relatively new to the college (either her first or second year), and created a spring term class that was essentially Queer 20th Century History. I was a history major and thought of it as a double win.

It wasn't bad a first, actually pretty enjoyable. She didn't quite give off the experienced-teacher vibe, cause it seemed like her eyes were forever glued to the notes she had for that day and every 10 or so minutes we'd get some version of "according to/as per the source..."

About 2/3 through the semester, we get to the Stonewall Riots. As the class was about to end, we get assigned a 3-page "opinions & thoughts" essay on the event.

No big deal. It's a major historical queer event and filling 3 pages would be a breeze.

So, of course, I procrastinate until the night before. I'm looking through my notes for a specific date, but realize I had only written the year. I hop onto Wikipedia, search for the Stonewall Riots page, and start scanning it.

It took a whole two paragraphs to realize that I was reading her entire lecture from that day. Terminology, paragraph transitions, the works. It wasn't true word-for-word, but it must have been 90% identical. I read the rest of the article with my jaw just about on the floor. I texted a couple of my friends that were taking the class with me and told them to read through it. I needed confirmation that I wasn't imagining it.

I wasn't.

The next afternoon, we were back in the class. In all honesty, I cant even remember what that day's lesson was, because I was determined to indirectly call her out. After the second mention of "source", I raised my hand. She acknowledges, and I ask, "What sources are these, in case we need references for later?"

I wasn't expecting her to get as flustered as she did. After staring at the booklet of notes she was reading from and a couple "ummmmm..."s, she finally looked back up at me and said she'd email me her sources later that day (which, by the way, I'm still waiting for 12 years later). For the rest of the semester, we would randomly ask her the same question, and not once were we given an actual answer. Checking Wikipedia after the lessons (and sometimes during) became a common occurrence, and almost like a game for the remaining month or so.

Flash forward to the next semester. I was now a senior and in need of a filler class to fulfill my minimum semester credits. I figured I'd try out the same professor and signed up for her new class.

If it's any indication of how engaging it was, I don't even remember what the class actually covered. Part of me wants to say Medieval Art, because the only thing I remember from that entire semester was a paper that involved looking up the details of various pieces (artist, year created, country, yadda yadda).

Essentially, a waste of a couple thousand dollars for a dud class.

Semester just about comes to a close, and we are looking through our choices to end the year with. Once again in filler desperation, paired with senioritis and the painful need to not have an 830 class, I was left with only one choice: The History of Agriculture. With her.

I made it a full three classes before dropping it and waking up early for a music class that just had enough credits attached to hit the minimum. I felt so bad for the friend who had been taking the class with me; as the prof was signing the form for me to drop the class, the look on my friend's face screamed "please don't leave me here".

Even worse for her, she had two classes with this same prof that semester. One day at lunch, she drops down across from me at the table and starts telling me how she can't take this teacher anymore. In the US History class she taught, she spent all of 20 minutes on Frederick Douglass, then turned around and took a whole week on the importance of grass.

I get it. I went to an Environmental Liberal Arts College. But in my own opinion, someone categorized as a General History professor should probably put the focus on the major events of history, especially when it pertains to the title of the class.

She's still teaching there. I wonder if she's memorized the Wikis yet.

LoneKitsune11

"I could barely read the content..."

My 9th-grade science teacher. I could barely read the content he wrote on the board so I had to copy notes from one of my friends half the time. He had bad handwriting and also handwrote all of our tests/quizzes and I never got above a C- on any of his tests or quizzes the entire year. I had good grades in my other classes except for his.

Also once when I was feeling sick, I had to use the bathroom before class started so I asked to go and he asked me if it was actually an emergency. I said it was so he let me go. Not even fifteen minutes later, I felt my stomach turn and I literally ran to the bathroom like my @ss was on fire. After I was done, another girl who was in the same class as me got me some water and walked with me back to class so I could get my stuff to go home. We get to the door and it's locked. She knocked and he unlocked the door and let us in. Then he asked me what I was doing and I said I got sick so I was going home.

The next year when I switched over to the public school, I got a way better science teacher and my grade went up to an A.

zinskH95

"My whole school..."

Bit late to this, but in Year 7 (11-12 years old), my maths teacher was giving us our class test, I had a pencil that rolled across the desk and me being only 11 didn't see the issue with standing up to take my pencil back. Teacher saw me doing this, comes across the classroom takes my test and throws it in the bin at the front of the room.

For clarity, there were two students to each desk, one on the end of the table and the other at the other end but on the long edge - my pencil had rolled towards this other student. I see how it may look like I was cheating, but to throw my test in a bin on a test I actually was confident on ruined any further maths for me and I still can not stand it.

(From that binned test I went from set 1 - highest in the year - to set 4. Still a bit miffed at that.)

I also had an art teacher in Year 9 (13-14 years old), who gave me a detention for telling him the white box (in the white to black gradients we had to paint) had already been painted white and continuously putting more white in the box would be pointless.

The same man gave my friend two weeks of detentions in the same class for something equally as stupid - our head of year wasn't able to take the detentions away for either of us, but she allowed both of us to leave class for lunch 30 minutes early so we still had a lunchtime and my friend wasn't lonely on the days she had detentions.

My whole school was mainly filled with teachers who didn't care about you and many that told me I shouldn't be what I wanted to be because I was too bad at things, which only made me not want to do the work for their class more. Can safely say for every single one of those classes, I aced at higher levels when I had teachers who actually believed in me.

(All classes I was told I shouldn't do, triple science at GCSE, I didn't do well in. Not only was I already anxious over my decision in the first place, the advisor who told me I was too bad to take them made it worse, on top of the teachers continuously saying it during class. I took it at a higher level, after getting decent grades without revision and got high 90's marks in everything and studied it at university.)

TOSIR03

"The honorable mentions..."

Either my 4th-grade math teacher, or my 7th-grade art teacher.

4th-grade teacher was a douche, and often yelled at every student for no reason. A friend of mine, let's call him Michael, was hated the most by her. She would constantly berate him 24/7. She also got me suspended because I was defending myself from a bully.

7th-grade teacher was homophobic and discriminated against me because I have autism so I can't understand and think the same as other people. He openly called me the R word right in front of the whole class. Friends of mine were definitely pissed off. I ended up leaving the class and cried to the principal's office. He got fired about 1 week later.

I had a substitute teacher back in the 6th grade who is hated by universally everyone in the entire school. Reasons? She discriminated against my friend, who is Korean, and called him racial slurs, and said he has no friends. He got LIVID. A bunch of us were upset as well, and eventually, 4 months later, she got fired because a student finally complained to her.


The honorable mentions are my 5th-grade science teacher and my 6th-grade math teacher.

5th-grade teacher made life a living hell, when I was bullied, I often got in trouble, without the bullies. She tried every excuse in the book to find a reason to get me in trouble.

6th-grade math teacher pushed and fought a student in the hallway. It ended with the kid pushing her to the floor and the kid was suspended for several days. Karen was never suspended or fired.

F*** you to the following teachers:

Mrs. Weaver. Mrs. Kays. Mrs. Oglesby. Mr. Alligood.

thegamingdude426

"The worst?"

The worst? Blanche Brown, sixth-grade horror. She was old. She had several knit skirt sets, ALL the same, ALL in brown. She looked like a giant yeti, her head topped by a crown of frizzy white hair, and she had a high forehead. She had it out for me from day one, every day she'd pick at me. I had a learning disability, she put me in the accelerated learning groups, then she would berate me for falling behind.

She stopped me from going to art class and said, "You're good enough at that, you need to focus on math." And she did that without telling my parents, my dad had it out with the principal. Finally, at mid-year she made me miss the bus and she called me stupid, sloppy, and lazy. When my mom found that out, it was all-out war. My parents pulled me out of public school, went into a Catholic School for a semester, and excelled. I have two college degrees, I have chair statewide organizations in historic preservation and history. I enjoyed a long term career. I have had book contracts, and my books are best sellers in their categories. Every time I get those residual checks from my publisher, it proves Mrs. Brown wrong. It wasn't until reunions later on that I understood how pervasive her abuse was. But we all survived, and our successes as a vindication of her malevolent ways.

YourAuntBarbara

"It wasn't that I hated him..."

Had a band teacher in middle school. It wasn't that I hated him necessarily, but he hated us. Whenever a student would slightly piss him off, he would knock down his chair and break sh!t. I specifically remember a time of him snapping his glasses in half and throwing a chair at the wall while dropping multiple f-bombs. That was an interesting day lol.

yippinq

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Old Wives' Tales People Still Believe For Some Reason

"Reddit user the_spring_goddess asked: 'What is an old wives tale that people still believe?'"

Close up of an owl tilting their head to side, looking bewildered
Photo by Josh Mills

The old wives' tales.

They are the stories of legend.

I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.

Where did they originate?

WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!

You don't hear about them as much anymore.

It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.

But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.

Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:

"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"

"Wait an hour to swim after eating."

What a crock!

So many summer hours wasted.

I want revenge for that one.

Say Nothing

Giphy

"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."

LonelyMail5115

"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."

I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA

Say Something

"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."

Severe_Airport1426

"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."

crappycurtains

"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."

AlbinoShavedGorilla

Body Temps

"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."

chriseo22

"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."

"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."

apocalypticradish

Arms Down

"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."

Fatmouse84

10 Years Actually

Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine Giphy

"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."

REDDIT

"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."

Gecko-911

I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.

This tale is haunting.

High/Low

Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace Giphy

"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."

LeastFormal9366

"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."

IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI

The Cursed

"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."

"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."

SmoreOfBabylon

Stay In

"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."

"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."

worldbound0514

Dreams and Facts

"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."

"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."

mattshonestreddit

"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."

Darthdemented

Cracked

Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office Giphy

"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."

Choice-Grapefruit-44

"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."

MacyTmcterry

I love my knuckles.

Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

However not everyone feels that way about their job.

So what are these compelling careers?

Keep reading... Show less
Therapist talking during session
Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Some people stand firmly stand behind their beliefs that everyone would benefit from therapy and that therapy is life-changing.

It's because of the totally life-changing truth bombs their therapist had dropped during their sessions.

Curious, Redditor anonymiss0018 asked:

"What is a little bombshell your therapist dropped in one of your sessions that completely changed your outlook?"

Communication Issues

"'If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?'"

- maggiebear

"I love this. I have a 'friend' who I always seem to run into misunderstandings with. Every time we had a conversation, it somehow turned into a debate even if it was me talking about my day. The conversations were never easy."

"I always evaluate myself first and take into consideration his critiques. He was very good at convincing me that I was contradicting myself or wasn't good at communicating my thoughts."

"I NEVER had this issue with ANYONE else in my life. I kept trying to figure out where the miscommunication was coming from. In the end, I just minimized contact and now I don't run into this issue."

- chobani_yo

"I read this quote somewhere once (and probably have it a bit wrong): 'It's a waste of time arguing with someone who is determined to misunderstand you.'"

- Reddit

Emotional Regulation

"'You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.'"

"At the time, I was a young adult who had learned zero healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind."

- lil_mermaid

Tough Relationships

"'It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I'm not so sure it should be so difficult.'"

"At the time he said this, I remember it was like he said, 'The earth is flat.' I thought he was crazy when he suggested relationships don't need to be difficult. But eventually, I started to realize I was trying to change myself to stay with this person rather than just being who I am."

"It took me three more months to finally break up with her but from that day on, I vowed to never again abandon myself just to be with someone I had convinced myself was better than me."

- metric88

High-Stress Situation

"I was at a high-stress time, and I asked her how people live like this."

"She replied, 'Oftentimes they have cardiac events.' She said it as an urging to care for myself as much as possible."

- KittenGr8r

The End of Alcohol

"I was struggling with my alcoholism, and we were discussing how I had been cutting back."

"She asked what I would consider success, with regard to my drinking."

"I said I wanted to get to a point where it wasn't interfering with my daily life. I wanted to just be able to have a glass of wine at holiday dinners or family gatherings."

"She simply asked me why. Why was it important for me to drink at those times?"

"It was as if she'd turned on a light. Alcohol had always been a key ingredient in every family function, for my entire life. When I smell bourbon, I think of my uncle. When I smell vermouth, I think of my dad. Alcohol ran through almost every happy childhood memory."

"But, even more than that, I was very afraid of the explanation I'd have to give when family and friends asked why I wasn't having a drink. I had tried to quit before but failed. What if I admitted my problem, only to fall off the wagon?"

"When she asked why I didn't want to completely quit, it was the first time I saw that last part of the big picture. I'd be willing to drink myself to death in order to avoid being scrutinized, or judged for possible future failures."

"That was the day I quit. I've been sober since May 6th, 2017. 2,407 days."

- sophies_wish

Acceptance vs. Enjoyment

"'Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.'"

"That took away a lot of my inner conflicts about situations because I could accept a situation without expending energy internally fighting against the injustice of it."

- alibelloc

Emotionally Immature Parents

"You are not responsible for your parents' emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you."

- SmokedPears

Not So Lazy

"'Why do you think you're lazy?' Then she listed off all the things she knows I'm doing for my family, my job, and my life."

"It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example."

"She also described family dysfunction as water. Some families are messed up in a way that everyone can see the huge waves across the surface. Others are better at hiding it, but there's still a riptide that you can't see unless you're also in the water."

"It made me realize that trying to keep the surface from ever rippling doesn't erase what is happening underneath."

- flybyknight665

The Harm in People-Pleasing

"'Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable?' when talking about people pleasing and fawning."

- ERsandwich

Agree to Disagree

"'Stop trying to get everyone to agree. When you need everyone to agree, the least agreeable person has all the power.'"

This really changed my outlook on planning family events."

- freef

Grieve and Start Anew

"For context, I had a major TBI (traumatic brain injury), seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28."

"They said, 'You have to grieve the loss of yourself.'"

"Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The f**ked up truth is that part of my brain is dead. The person everyone (including myself) knew died. I needed to grieve the loss of myself."

- squeaktoy_la

Multifaceted Identity

"They told me that my job and career is just a way to make money; it's not my life or identity. That took a lot of pressure off me."

- unfairpegasus

Breaking the Cycle

"They validated me."

"'You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them."

"But your children are 19 and 21 now. They are happy and healthy and they trust you because you’ve never abused them in any way. So I just want to validate for you that you really have broken that cycle of violence."

"You did that. And you should be proud of it. I’m proud of you for it.'"

- puppsmcgee74

The Grieving Process

"I was constantly bringing up how I felt like a completely different person after my mom died... like there was a marked difference between before and after her death."

"But once, she was asking about my hobbies, I got really into describing all the things I loved to do or at least used to do before I got into a deep depression."

"She was like, 'Wow, you seem very passionate.'"

"And I just sat there like, 'Well, I mean, I can't change what I like to do, they're still fun to do.'"

"And it's like she knew when to take a step back, because it was like, wow, I may be super depressed about my mom passing, but I'm still me. I'm still my passions and those don't go away."

"I don't know, maybe it only makes sense to be, but it really started getting me back on track."

- Hannibal680

Sharing the Load

"I've never really had friends. I've had colleagues and classmates and housemates and people who have hung out with me, but I never really felt close to any of them."

"And I did that thing you see on here sometimes; I stopped reaching out to see if I would be reached out to, and I wasn't, which I took as confirmation that they didn't really want me around, or at the very least, that they wouldn't mind my absence."

"I was talking to my therapist about people I'd been close to in college, and she told me to pick one and talk about him. So I did. After I shared some basic stuff like his name and his major etc., and a couple of anecdotes, she asked me what else I knew about him."

"And I couldn't answer. It wasn't really a broadly applicable bombshell, but she said, 'What else?' and I started crying because I realized that for as simple as the question was, my inability to answer spoke volumes."

"I've never had good friends because I've never been a good friend. I'm withdrawn and reserved and I always made others do the work to drag me out, without ever extending my own friendship in a meaningful way in return. If I wanted to have meaningful relationships with other people, I would have to build them."

"I'm still working on this, but I'm trying to make more offers and extend more friendliness to others in my daily life."

- Backupusername

The discoveries in this thread were incredibly touching and profound; it's no wonder these were lasting concepts for these Redditors.

It's important to keep ourselves open to inspiration and insights from others, as we have no idea how their experiences could help us, or how we could help them.

Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?