When I was ten I decided I was a dancing valkyrie. I would shimmy all over my mother's house with abandon, sometimes in her high heels. Ten year olds in high heels, breaking it down to Madonna can lead to some disaster. One cloudy day, I was lost in "Like a Prayer." My mother had this little rectangular sized stereo (vey hip at the time) and the music blasted through it. Without thinking I jumped on her bed, heels first, in a dark room. I decided to do a back flip as Madonna sent the song's crescendo to God.
You'd be stunned how sharp the edge of a little stereo can be. I landed directly on a corner, splitting the flesh above my lip. Some blood. Some tears. Five stitches and now a life long reminder. Lesson... don't do flips on a bed in heels.Redditor u/Zander-dupont was wondering how everyone has blemished their bodies now and again by asking... What is the stupidest way you got a scar?
It will always be the small things that get you. The more simplicity involved, the higher the level of danger. If only we knew that tying a necktie or gardening in the yard could lead to catastrophe. Although if we're more aware of the world around us, we'd never leave the house. But we should stay vigilant. The following people probably wish they had.
Tied Upgrocery store falling GIFGiphy
I couldn't tie my laces as a kid and liked to walk with my hands in my pockets.
This led to me tripping over my laces, no hands to protect and landing face first onto a stone step, the corner of which went right between my eyes, leaving a small scar where my monobrow grows.
I was holding a super soaker reservoir bottle underwater at a lake to fill it up. It slipped out of my hand and shot up out of the water, hit me in my lip and split it open all the way through to the other side. Needed stitches inside my mouth and right below my bottom lip. Got a small scar from it.
Kid in the church nursery hit me in the eye with a plastic carrot. It was 40 years ago. I've still got a scar.
I was in a cornfield and grabbed a cob of corn to throw at a friend. The leaf from the corn stalk went between my middle and index fingers as I released the throw and sliced the webbing open deep enough that I could see my tendons. That was 25 years ago and I still have the scar.
I can't do blood; not mine, not yours. If a massive injury befalls you and I'm around... I hope it's a good death. I'll be passed out bleeding from the head, due to my fainting on the floor next to you. The next bunch of people have witnessed or survived a few instances that require a trigger warning. And I hate the word gnarly. It holds too many memories... you'll see.
My father fell off his motorbike and went through a bush that contained a barb wire fence. Tore his mouth up pretty bad.
But that's not the story I'm telling. No.
My auntie had knee surgery when I was a toddler and as she was just about able to walk she came over to visit. Toddler me, being a little fool, decided to go over to her with my plastic mallet and bopped her on her knee. My father laughed so hard that his stitches opened. :/.
to be sure...angry knife GIF by MunchiesGiphy
Someone said "that knife is for cutting tape, so it won't cut people" and I checked.
The headrest of our bed was made of solid wood and had curved edges. It was wide enough for a 2 year old (me) to sit on and I used to love sliding off it. Well one night I sat on it to slide as usual with my legs on either side. My leg on the bed got stuck between the pillows and I fell face first on the floor. Got a cut on my forehead which required 6-7 stitches.
10 year old me shredded too hard on a razor scooter. I hit a bump going down the steepest hill in my hometown and gave the concrete a pretty good People's Elbow.....still have a 3 inch scar that wraps around my elbow and looks pretty gnarly for a razor scooter accident.
Sometimes we're just lacking in common sense. I have a broken tooth (now mended cosmetically) from the time I decided to swing around a pole like a lasso wrangled by a cowboy, with my eyes closed. I loved the feel of the air refreshing my face. However I wasn't paying attention to the ground beneath me, so when I tripped on my last spin, I smashed my face into said pole. And the rest is horror history. The next few dolts can relate.
Got a string tied around my ankle to see if it was strong enough to hold me back when I ran.
It was not.
The scar circles my ankle and hasn't changed in 20 years.
Brought him to my mom's place on the coast, and while I brought my own normal-sized leash, my mom had one of those extend-o leashes with a tiny round cord, which I thought might be nice for him to run on the beach.
On the trail back from the beach, we came across someone walking another dog. My dog gets really excited about other dogs, especially now that we're all isolated and crap. In his frenzy he wrapped the leash around my shorts-clad legs and then yanked it tight. The stupid skinny leash worked like a garotte and sliced the mess out of my calf.
I stuck a hand between the gears of my grandmother's sewing machine while it was running.
Scars, like tattoos can be very sexy. However, you don't want too many. So be careful out there. Look both ways at crosswalks, be methodical in action. Literally tripping over a soda can can kill you... true story.
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It can be very embarrassing when you pronounce words wrong. Let's face it, the English language is super complicated, especially if you're learning it for the first time. You can't always trust yourself to pronounce things phonetically either because of all the different rules!
Recently, a relative pronounced the word "epitome" like "epi-tome." They were embarrassed when I corrected them. I told them that it wasn't a big deal, though they did note that they love that word, have used it for a long time, and that no one corrected them until that moment...
People told their stories after Redditor adeptwarrior asked the online community,
"What's an 'oh sh*t' moment where you realised you've been doing something the wrong way for years?"
"When I was five..."
"When I was five a Pizza Hut employee told me that the powder on the breadsticks was called fairy dust. Ordered extra fairy dust on my breadsticks until I was around 14 when an employee said ‘do you mean garlic salt?’ It still devastates me to realize how obtuse I was."
Believe it or not, Pizza Hut does refer to the mixture—made of of italian seasoning oregano, basil, garlic, marjoram, and parmesan—as fairy dust.
"When he caught me..."
"It wasn’t very long, but when I was learning to drive my dad was explaining the rule of thumb regarding a safe distance to be behind the car in front of you. I thought it meant to hold your thumb up and if your thumb didn’t cover the entire car you were too close to it."
"When he caught me doing that he asked me what I was doing. When I explained he burst out laughing, then considered it, and concluded it wasn’t a bad idea but perhaps a bit distracting."
Also every other driver thinks youre a super friendly guy or a bit passive agressive.
"We got it delivered..."
"We bought a nice liquor cabinet. We got it delivered and noticed it was a bit shorter than we thought. No biggie. Three years later, we’re moving. Lift up cabinet and these beautiful, ornate, screw on legs wrapped in tape and bubble wrap fall off the bottom. Looks so much better now!"
This is cute—it's like you discovered an entirely brand new piece of furniture!
"When he mentioned..."
"Until last week, when my father in law would made a phone call on his very basic non-touch-screen flip phone he would open the menu, scroll to the phone icon, open it, hit the soft key for contacts, scroll to the person he wanted to call, press ok, then press the soft key to call."
"When he mentioned how he preferred his landline because he could just dial the number, I said "Humour me. Just dial the number and hit the talk button." I've never seen a man so simultaneously grateful and embarrassed."
Aww, this is sweet. It's important to help older folks feel up to speed with technology. He was definitely more grateful than embarrassed.
"Since the dawn of time..."
"Since the dawn of time, I would pick up the silverware and utensils out of their tray in the dishwasher and put them away in their drawers then go back and pick up more out of the dishwasher. Then one day I saw my wife lift the tray out of the dishwasher and I legit stood there with my mouth open."
I did not ask to be attacked like this. Leave me alone!
"I always thought..."
"I always thought eggplant tasted "itchy" like itchy was a flavor, like sour or salty. Fed some to my baby and his face turned red wherever the eggplant touched, and I realized we're both just allergic to eggplant. And itchy isn't a flavor."
This is rather sweet but glad to hear that neither you nor your baby had a more serious reaction!
"Apparently the red ring around the bologna is not supposed to be eaten."
Tell that to just about everyone I grew up with.
"My mom has been pronouncing Massachusetts "Massa Two Sh*ts" for years and no one corrected her because they thought she just had strong feelings about Massachusetts."
I mean, have you heard of "Massholes"? They're a thing.
"Well the name I recorded..."
"Well... This was a few years ago. I was the director of IT for a very large company. I was given a new cellphone and told to setup my voicemail. I don’t know that when I recorded my name it would be played to whomever I leave a voice mail for."
"Well the name I recorded was, “Dooder84 Corporate IT Godddd!!!”
I worked there for 4 years until someone in the hallway referred to me as the “corporate IT GoD!” I was so embarrassed."
Wear it confidently because this type of stuff makes people like you more. They don't feel the need to be fake around you.
"My mom used to..."
"My mom used to refer to me as a “bull in a china shop." Always heard it as “bowl in a china shop." Thinking it was a compliment. At about 22 I hear someone else use the phrase and realized she meant “bull,” not “bowl."
Aww, there goes your mom telling you how dainty and priceless you are again!
Don't be too embarrassed. We all fumble, it's what makes us human. Laugh at yourself because chances are that no one else cares as much as you do.
Have some stories of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
There are many TV shows with compelling themes and interesting character developments that impressed both critics and audiences alike back in the day.
But some of the shows that once captivated audiences have not aged well, and there are many elements in them that are outdated by today's standards.
Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor lilac_cup asked:
"Which tv series has aged like milk?"
The handling of these controversial TV story lines seem so careless in retrospect.
Addressing Child Abuse
"The very first episode of Hill Street Blues has two cops breaking up a domestic disturbance caused by a woman finding her man f'king her 15yo daughter. The man is told not to be sh**ty, the woman is told to put out more and the child is told not to be so tempting. Then the cops leave, patting themselves on the back for a job well done."
The Teacher's Secret Relationship
"Pretty Little Liars. I think even at the time, the teacher dating his 16 year old student storyline was considered creepy, but in 2022 it’s honestly unbelievable that was ever portrayed in any kind of positive light. Also that her parents didn’t immediately just report him to the police."
"Not the whole series but Ally McBeal. In one episode Ally found out her bf is bi and her reason breaking up with him was she afraid that one day her bf would be attracted to their son."
These reality shows would never fly in a "woke" world.
"There was a reality show on Fox called 'Black. White.' Where they put a white family in blackface and a black family in whiteface."
"Just reading about it, it turns out the white family wasn't even a real family. They were unrelated actors."
"Extreme makeover. I remember watching this show as a kid and being like oh wow they’re fixing all these ugly people with plastic surgery and making them happy. I just think that caused a whole generation to think they could change their body with money. Show lasted like 4 seasons. Couldn’t imagine that show today."
"Secret life of an American teenager."
"My god this show was terrible. My wife’s sister was into it and we ended up watching a lot of it when we were dating. I think they tried to make the banter like Gilmore Girls, but it ended up being the characters repeating their current plots and arcs over and over. I don’t remember the characters at all, but the main character was such a horrible person, and the audience is supposed to root for her."
"The main things I remember about it were the religious girl claiming she killed her dad by having sex with her boyfriend, and apparently you go to Bologna to get bjs."
"You Are What You Eat."
"Host Gillian McKeith (or to use her full medical title, Gillian McKeith) was an absolute quack with an online medical qualification from a Mickey Mouse university. She pretended to be a scientist by being recorded standing around in a lab wearing a white coat, spouted unscientific nonsense that anyone who had done a GCSE in science could see through, and was obsessed with getting people to shit in Tupperware boxes."
"It got cancelled after the final series when you had to have her move in with you. In the last few years she popped up again as a prominent anti-vaxxer once COVID vaccines became available."
These pageant shows glorifying good looks and talent would never be greenlit today.
"Dance moms- used to be entertaining, now all I can see is the psychological effects it must’ve had on those girls."
"Americas Next Top Model has to be #1."
"From all the behind the scenes sh*t that went on in production to what the show actually shows. It’s all just horrendous."
From Ugly To Beautiful
"The Swan, was 2 women who are considered 'ugly ducklings' participating in a pageant against each other after undergoing a three-month transformative process aka having heaps of plastic surgery."
"Right?! How were they allowed to do so many procedures in such a short time while completely isolating these women from their families? Making them diet and exercise while healing from a tummy tuck, breast implants, and veneers?! The 'therapy' sessions were a joke and were just for show while these poor women with low self esteem were preyed upon for entertainment. Just out of a safety and medical prospective…wow."
Judging The Reflection
"Didn't they also not allow the contestants/patients to have mirrors the whole time so they were surprised when they saw themselves? Psychologically having massive changes like that and it being sudden is extremely bad for your brain, you can end up rejecting the reflection because it's not 'you.'"
As audiences evolve, so does the writing and development of all forms of entertainment.
But because the changes are gradual, it is jarring when looking back and noticing how offensive and isolating some of these shows can be.
Times sure have changed in the world of entertainment–mostly for the better.
After having grown up inside the protective environment that was your childhood home, the inevitable time to leave and carve out your own path without a safety net can be terrifying.
Emotions can vary–with some people itching to leave their trappings while others terrified of adulting in the real world.
Curious to hear experiences from strangers online, Redditor WallStreetDoesntBet asked:
"People who moved out of the parent’s house before 30, how?"
Most people can't afford to live on their own.
Roommate Is Key
"yeah this exactly. I've never lived by myself, was roommates until I got a serious girlfriend and now fiance. There's exactly 0% chance of me being in the same position I'm in financially if I had been paying full rent all those years."
Not A Care In The World
"I was 17, we had 4 of us in a ghetto 2bd apt (bunkbeds) we had a beer bong on a lanyard screwed to the ceiling. We'd have keggers, party's every weekend and always had randoms crashing on the floor. Could barely afford to feed myself and pay bills but still not a worry in the world and it was the best time of my life."
One inconvenience shared by many was the sacrifice of a good, home-cooked meal.
Change Of Scenery
"Just needed a little R&R."
"Roommates and Ramen."
The "Wild" Years
"This, lol. I was kicked out at 16 and after couch-surfing for a few months I moved into a studio apartment with 4 other people."
"When I say we were poor, I mean poor - most of us didn’t have jobs. I lived off the worst of the worst food. Knockoff ramen. Dollar store canned veg. Rice and terrible year old pasta."
"It was a wild few years."
Rice For Life
"Or rice. I lived off rice for a full year. Fancied it up by adding some salsa, and then extra fancy by also adding ranch dressing."
"Those were hard times."
Having work definitely makes things easier.
Saving Up To Leave
"Started working while I was in school. Got out as soon as I could."
Not Much Fanfare
"Yep, moved out for college in 2006. Came back for the summer in 2007, but thereafter I got an internship so I just stayed in the city. Got a job at the same place after I graduated."
"It was never some big moment for me (my parents are fine, just annoying), just a natural progression for me."
Building A Life
"At 18. Worked in construction. Lived on a couch with 6 buddies in one house paying for college. Bought cheap land during the recession. Then built my own house."
Not moving out by choice seemed to be a common shared experience.
High Turnover Rate
"Got kicked out at 14. Finished high school sleeping on friends couches while serving tables. Had a ton of roommates for the next 10 years. At any given time I was living with like 3 or 4 people, it was never boring haha"
"I am hearing that so many people are actually kicked out in the really young age is well."
"But i am not getting that why parents are so tough because in my country they try to keep them under their wings."
"My friends parents were going to kick him out immediately after he graduated high school simply because 'That's what their parents did when they were his age.' His Dad fully expected him to go out at 18 and buy a house because 'he was able to.'"
"Then his Dad got pissed when my friend did not buy a house and went to live with his uncle instead. Even after his uncle broke down the whole 'Your mortgage is $2200/month with taxes and you expect your son, who works part time at $7.25 an hour to afford a mortgage? With no credit history?'"
"Some parents do it out of tough love. Some parents do it because they shouldn't have had children. Some parents still think the world is the same as it was in the 70s-80s and think minimum wage part time employees can thrive."
"My parents didn't kick me out, but there was definitely an expectation for me to be moved out and financially independent at 18. My mother walked into a job as a radio DJ at the age of 18 and then became a journalist with only a high school education a few years later (early 1970s), so she had this expectation that I could do the same. The thought of me being able to do anything like that in the 2000s was laughable."
I moved out of my parents' house because I booked my first professional gig on a cruise ship.
It couldn't have worked out better. I was paid to perform on board in the shows while my rent was already taken care of since I lived and worked on the ship.
I packed one suitcase and traveled the world doing what I loved for about two years. It was the best way to transition into an exciting new chapter in my adolescent life.
What's your moving out story?
I may not be popular for saying this, but I think comedy is the best form of entertainment.
However, it’s not always easy to find great comedy.
There are lots of comedians who make me smile or even make me laugh at a joke or two. Yet, it’s really hard to find a comedian who can keep me laughing through their whole set.
If you’re having trouble finding those kinds of comedians, or are just ready to find a new comedian to enjoy, Redditors are here to help.
Probably hoping to find a great comedian themself, Redditor Plastic_Ad_6179 asked:
"Who's the best comedian of all time in your opinion?"
"For many reasons, but mainly for being the undisputed champion of the world in...Carrot In A Box:"
"What a HUGE talent. Luckily he left a lot of great footage. Terrible loss."
"The comedians comedian"
"Honorable mention to Bill Burr."
"When I turned 21, my mom took me to Vegas. We saw Carlin perform and we laughed solidly for 90 minutes. I don’t remember any of the jokes, but I have never laughed like that since. He was a true master of the art."
"Carlin is the only correct answer. Nobody will ever touch that level of wit, wordplay, satire, and social commentary."
"I went to a Mike Birbiglia show at Zanies in Nashville back in 2008. Guy killed…got up on stage, told 1 story. Took him 90 minutes to get through that story. The whole time, he’s veering off on tangents that seemed completely natural, conversational even. Each tangent was a tiny hilarious story itself. The show seemed so smooth and flowed so naturally, that I could hardly believe it was written. It was masterful. Sure, he doesn’t tell jokes that leave you breathless with laughter, but he does tell jokes that get 90% of the way there with such consistency that I’m actually more impressed with that than the former."
"In terms of:"
- "Being at the top of his game for a long period of time"
- "Being perfect at timing and execution"
- "Understanding comedy to a degree that other comedians notice and respect"
- "Being clever and witty on the spot"
- "Having memorable jokes and killer standup routines"
"My favorite story about Norm MacDonald I've heard is that when he was coming up if he bombed he'd wait in the back of the club after the show to shake everyone's hand in their way out. If he killed he wouldn't. What a legend."
"If you asked a group of comedians who their favorite comedian is I'd bet Norm would be near the top of the list. So much of his material was a deconstruction of comedy itself. If Norm MacDonald tells you a bad joke, and you laugh, is it still a bad joke? Why is it funny? Are you laughing at him or is he laughing at you?"
"Mitch Hedberg. RIP."
"I used to love that guy. I still do but I used to too."
""I got in an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That’s a bad place for an argument, because I tried to walk out, and had to slam the flap.""
""F**k you, zzzzzzzzzzip""
"Monty Python, as a group."
"I don't think there's been a single more influential comedy act than Flying Circus."
"I agree with it just because it’s one of the few non-American mentions here. People seriously think that humor ends on American Stand Up and television…"
"Also Monty Python is ALWAYS funny"
"Live on Broadway stands as one of the most memorable things I have ever watched."
"Idk why he isn’t higher on this list or mentioned more often. Robin Williams had absolutely insane improv skills. Watch the episode of Who’s Line with him as the guest star, the rest of the cast can’t keep it together."
"Scrolled this far to find a female comedian! Love Lucille Ball"
"I saw I Love Lucy was streaming a couple months ago. Having watched it as a kid, I figured I’d put it on for a nostalgic chuckle. I was not ready for that show to be so, so funny—I nearly passed out I was laughing so hard."
"She was a comedic genius."
"Rowan Atkinson (John Cleese closely second)"
"Atkinson is such an amazing physical comedian that it’s basically overlooked that he’s a first-rate stand-up, as well."
"He saved SNL. They wouldn't be on air today were it not for Murphy"
"Goat of comedy"
Comedy may not be everyone’s favorite form of entertainment, but it is a can’t miss, so long as the comedian in question is a good one.
Luckily, we’ve got some great suggestions above.