I have to admit. I was not fond of being poor. I was ten when I realized my family had some financial issues. My mother sat me down to explain that she needed to go to the food drive to get somethings. It had been a hard year and she wanted me to be prepared in case someone we knew saw us. It was heartbreaking.
My mother has always been a hard worker and she hates asking for help. So that's why it infuriates me when people try to say that being poor is just a mentality and the poor should just try not to be poor. My mother did make it out of several financial holes but it was always an uphill battle, because the truth is... being poor only makes you more poor. The system is designed that way.
Redditor u/26point2PipeDream wanted everyone to start realizing that the game is rigged, often by the system keeping the poor, poor. They asked everyone to explain by inquiring... In what way is it expensive to be poor?
There are so many small details from the everyday, mundane that people with out an endless well of money have to do to survive. And it all may seem like nothing, but the nothings add up. They add up to spending and debt that can be necessary to survive. Look at real estate. Paying outrageous amounts of rent is fruitless. And mortgage is cheaper. But who can afford down payment for a mortgage? Maybe if you could get a free year of rent you could save for it. Hmmm....
Clothing Transportcats laundry GIFGiphy
I saw a lady coming out of a laundromat, loading her baskets of clothes into a taxi (there is zero other public transport where I saw this happen and only a few taxis).
Not being able to put enough money together at one time to buy a car or a washing machine (she probably rented so this maybe wasn't even an option) was costing her a fortune. Just being nickeled and dimed to death.
If you're ever desperate enough to take out a title/payday loan you'll discover you just stepped in financial quicksand.
About a year and a half ago I forgot to leave enough money in my bank account for a payment that needed to be done. It wasn't much, around $500 maybe, but didn't want the late payment and fees that come with it, so I decided to look into the payday loans. I needed $500 to last until Friday (when I would be paid)... I checked on it on Monday.
When I was to click "Accept", I read the entire thing... it said I had to pay back $950 IF I paid on Friday...or about $2,500 if I went with their payment plan.
Fees, fees and fees...
There are late fees for everything. Overdraft fees at the bank. Sh!tty jobs usually don't have good healthcare plans. If you're poor, you need credit cards just to survive, but interest rates are higher for those with low credit scores (see late fees above). Crappy cars are always breaking down, and that's expensive.
Death is Easier
Healthcare. That's the big one. If you don't have a healthcare plan, or have a crappy one you don't go to the doctor unless it's life or death. That means small problems that could have been caught in the beginning become hugely expensive problems later on.
Like parking tickets. I couldn't afford the £2 to pay to park my car so I get a £30 fine, after 2 weeks it goes up to £60 and so on. If I didn't have £2 to park in the first place I don't know how they think I can pay more.
When you're poor you have to crafty. You also have to be thrifty and smart ,but crafty is often overlooked. See poor people are constantly in a fight to survive so learning how to maneuver is a key going forward. You just have to maneuver very carefully. Don't fall for the financial traps. They're always ready to get you. Case in point...
Renting is like CreditCredit Card Money GIF by HustlersGiphy
Renting to own anything is really bad. You pay 4X the value of whatever it is you're renting to own. And if you miss a payment they repossess it and someone else might start at the beginning of attempting to pay for it again. Not only that you very well might be paying 4X the new value for a used item.
And only low quality items are sold rent to own. Ashley furniture, crappy used cars, the cheapest big screen TVs available at wholesale. Houses might be better, but rent a center, and JD Byrider are worse than loan sharks.
Being stuck with higher interest rates because you don't have enough credit to get low rates.
How a lender can ignore me paying upwards of $1500 a month in rent while contemplating a mortgage loan that is equivalent to $850 a month. You'd think that would be a pretty safe bet right there.
The Pre-Pay Options
You can seldom buy in bulk, so you end up paying more for thing. For example, our local butchery sells ground beef cheap if you buy 2 kg or more at a time. If you're paid weekly and can afford only 500 g per week, you end up paying more.
Buying in bulk is a huge money saver.
And it's so damn expensive.
You don't just need the money in advance to buy the groceries. You also need a freezer or cooler large enough to store it. And of course a vehicle to get it home. So many things to pre-pay before you can start saving.
I'll add that when you have less money the power relationship is flipped in nearly every financial interaction you have.
When you have money, banks and companies compete to get access to your reliable spending, be it with low interest rates on borrowing or better deals for early payment. They have to compete because you have the option to go to someone else who will gladly take your payment history and stable income.
You're a safe bet, so you have the luxury of choice.
When you don't have money institutions know you have nowhere else to go. So they happily gouge you knowing agreeing to horrendous loan terms is your only option.
I teach econ and always remind my kids that commercials boasting about "no credit, low credit, no problem!" know exactly who they're getting in the door. People who have nowhere else to go.
Time for Restructurestory justice GIF by PrimerGiphy
The justice system. If you can't pay a fine, the state will make things more expensive by adding fees on top of fees on top of fees, then they will incarcerate you for not paying the inflated fees. Then you have to pay the parole officer who is keeping an eye on you while you care unable to get a job that pays enough to pay him.
Not having in-home laundry is a great example.
Say it costs you $4 to do your laundry each week (which I think is very cheap). In 5 years you will have spent over $1000 on laundry.
For $1000 you can get a good washing machine that would last you through those 5 years, then another 5 years, and maybe a lot more. And that doesn't count the time saved doing laundry at home, and any transportation costs.
My car has a leaky seal on the transmission. It'd be about $250 to replace the seal and flush the transmission. I don't have $250, so I keep topping up the fluid and keep driving it because I'll never get $250 if I don't get to work. But, in time, that's going to destroy the transmission, which will be about $1200 to replace.
Edit:I never thought I'd say this in my entire life, but please stop offering me money. (I know. I'm insane, right?)
I'm getting by and my world will not end if my cars dies. It will be irritating and problematic, but I have other options I can make work, if the worst happens. In the mean time, plans are in place to resolve the issue and I have every reason to think that my car will survive until I can repair it.
I cannot tell you how much these offers mean to me. It has really made my night to have so many people want to help. Please, I ask you to turn your generous offers to others who are in a much more dire situation than I am.
There are several who commented on other threads on this post (as well as at least one who commented on this thread). I would not feel comfortable taking money under these circumstances when I have other options available to me. In short, other people here need it more.
Know that your kindness has made me smile on a day when really needed some brightness. I cannot put into words my gratitude. Thank you all.
For Walkinghappy reno 911 GIF by Comedy CentralGiphy
If you're well off, you buy 1 pair of boots for $150 and they last a lifetime.
If you're poor, you buy boots for $30 and they last a winter.
You end up spending more, because you can't afford to spend more. Terry Pratchett uses it to explain poverty via Sam Vines in one of his City Watch books.
If you can't maintain a minimum balance or don't have a bank in your neighborhood or were raised to be suspicious of banks and don't have a bank account, you've got to pay fees to cash your paychecks. Then there are fees to buy money orders to pay your bills-- or the cost of getting TO the utility office or car dealership or wherever to pay in cash.
So is one dental cleaning every 6 months (the reason its 6 months is because that is the time when cavities can form). Root Canals are now thousands of dollars and those dentists demand up front payment for those expensive services. Most people don't have an extra 2 grand in their bank account for a root canal.
Big Plansscared homer simpson GIFGiphy
Mental health. Or more specifically stress. You will always have stress about future, always making decisions based on your poverty so that it won't affect your situation in bad way.
What Really Hurts
Everything is expensive when you're poor. Jokes aside, this is true. I've been poor for most of my life and I'm still not in a great financial situation. And the biggest problem is that you not only don't have a lot of money, but all the prices stay the same, so literally ANYTHING that you buy feels like a fortune.
I walked to the grocery store do buy some stuff to make a special dinner on my daughter's birthday and I spent about R$100,00 (about 20 dollars I think, Idk), and I swear I'd win an Oscar for how I kept my poker face. The second I walked out of the store I bursted out crying. Everyone on the street could see me crying as I walked back home. Seeing my daughter's smile later that day during dinner made me feel a lot better, but those R$100 ($20) REALLY hurt.
If you're poor you already have no or very little money to invest in yourself, so you have to take on debt to do so. If you want to get technical certifications or degrees. Sometimes there's financial assistance but a lot of the time taking on loans is necessary.
Miles and Miles and Miles...
Tires! Used tires cost 1/3 price and get about 20% of the life of a new tire. Also you are paying mount and balance every time, plus worry about blow outs. Even a new tire at $80 with a 30K mileage expectancy or a $100 tire at 65k mileage warranty. Over twice the life, little more than 20% in extra charge.
A Holedonald duck disney GIFGiphy
Debt. Basically if you're poor you need to borrow some money to either get a house or buy food and after a while the debt keeps getting bigger and bigger.
In this moment the country is in the throws of cultural and financial battles. As I type, we await the Senate rulings on a financial plan for Covid. And the squabbling is endless. One of the main sticking points is raising the minimum wage to $15 and hour. Some Senators act like people are asking for a million dollars. Because God forbid we give the poor a leg up and shave a few measly dollars off the top from the super wealthy. You know, the ones rigging the whole game. Mhmmm.... Stay vigilant people and save those pennies.
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I had to stop watching talent shows years ago because while I got to see some really enjoyable acts—especially singers, of which there are a seemingly endless number—I grew sick and tired of how scripted everything felt.
For one thing, I hate overt sentimentalty because it can ring very false, and that's how I've felt whenever I've had to sit through any sob stories. Everyone has a sob story.
The music swells and immediately we'll hear about someone's cancer diagnosis or the fact they lost their house due to foreclosure or that their father died and that afterward they found bodies in his shed and learned he was a notorious serial killer...
Okay, that last one might have been made up. But my point stands.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor TheCheeto4 asked the online community,
"What is something that you find incredibly cringe, but you think other people wouldn't?"
"You just reminded me..."
"You just reminded me of those Facebook posts that give instructions to prove who is/isn't a "real friend", always ask you to share afterwards. Like a copy-paste friendship test."
I never bother with those. I always ignore them and I'm okay with that.
"People exaggerating how quirky, different or relatable they are."
You just described every manic pixie dream girl in Bushwick.
"People singing at me. I have no idea what to do and feel cringe the entire time. Some people love just having people sing to them though."
Many people feel super awkward when this happens... especially when it happens in a restaurant... on their birthday.
"Starting a Go Fund Me..."
"Starting a Go Fund Me the second news of a tragedy gets out. There was an accident by me, and there were two competing GFMs fighting over who was closer to the victim."
They do that so they can skiff the funds. People have no shame.
"I couldn't fathom..."
"Public vlogs. I couldn't fathom walking around the city holding a camcorder on a stick and talking to myself."
I hate them and don't understand why people would watch some rando walking around, going about his day. No thank you.
"The judges crying on those talent shows on TV."
Sob stories always increase your chances of entering and lasting longer on those shows.
"I love that unspoken thing where talent show judges act all surprised that the ugly person actually has a great voice!"
The Susan Boyle effect (and she wasn't even all that great to begin with, but it's the perfect example).
"Dating profiles and bios. I just can’t not feel weird about advertising my self to randos."
Always awkward. Even worse when you meet someone interesting and they are nothing like their profile at all.
"Turning on music/singing loudly in public places. I always listen to music in my headphones."
I would never. It's the height of rudeness.
"If someone is going..."
"Filming yourself doing acts of kindness. If someone is going to do something nice for me, and they film me and post that online I’ll be pissed."
It's everywhere. Social media is a pain.
Remember the last time you cringed to some of these? You probably do. It's the worst, isn't it?
Have some cringeworthy moments of your own to share? Tell us more in the comments below!
Two people getting together for the first time and feeling the undeniable chemistry between them is an enchanting discovery.
Without anything being verbally communicated, a person feeling a mutual romantic passion is the spark that potentially can ignite a long-lasting relationship.
However, that spark can also burn out when passions are too high, and that gut feeling indicating a fling was over before it started is never a welcome feeling.
Curious to hear about the negative dating experiences of strangers, Redditor LynxExplorer asked:
"What made you realize the relationship was over?"
Sometimes, the inner voices of reason doesn't register, and outside indicators sound the alarm to let scorned lovers know that romance is dead.
A Third Party
"When I got a Facebook message from another dude saying 'your wife is cheating on us.' He thought we had one of those open relationships."
"Editing to add: this happened a little over ten years ago. I got custody of the kid, I’m remarried, great job, new house, I’m doing good. And I also laugh about it when I think back on it."
"I once googled 'how do you know when a relationship is over' and the top suggestion was 'you google it.'"
"When I finally learned to listen to her actions, not her words."
These Redditors reflected back on their relationships only to realize the love in their relationships have disappeared some time ago.
"When contempt enters the picture. Hard to explain what contempt is, but once it's there it is done for."
"There's nothing like having someone you had an amazing time just have disgust for anything you do. Oh and the glare is deadly."
"Luckily by the time I got there I already made up my mind and stopped playing her victim blaming. We both had rough lives but you cut yourself to manipulate me."
Alone In Love
"when i was crying more than laughing. constant hurt and confusion, didn’t feel like the love was reciprocated."
Waiting For It To End
"I realized that I wouldn't care if he cheated on me and would've been quite happy if he left me for someone else. I felt trapped and didn't know how to leave at the time"
"Edit: We have a child together and share custody, so he will always be in my life, but it's still better than having to walk on eggshells in my own home."
"I'm very sorry to those of you going through this now. I hope you find happiness one day."
A Powerful Yearning
"When I started fantasizing about what it would be like to be completely alone."
These are just downright cruel and unforgiving discoveries.
Sliding Into DMs
"When I found sexts between her and my 'friend.'"
"He kept breaking up with me and then making up with me. Broke up with me on my birthday (because he wasn't getting my undivided attention as my best friend was there), called me for 6 months after trying to get back with me. Called me a 'f'king weasel.' His family still tries to reach out over 11 years later."
Whatever happened to communicating with your significant other when something is off in a relationship?
Sure, this is an uncomfortable conversation to have, but it's far more effective to discuss solutions or compromises.
Isn't it worse to let resentment build to the point where regrettable actions or words further destroy relationships?
Talk it out. You'll be a better person for it.
People have long engaged in passionate debates about their firm beliefs on any particular subject, the popular ones being religion and politics.
Those arguing on both sides of religious or political debates seldom see eye-to-eye with their opponents and are unable to find common ground.
But there are other arguments that are equally as passionate which people are not willing to negotiate, or at the very least, have some wiggle room for compromise.
Curious to hear some examples, Redditor lllSnowmanlll asked:
"What's your strongest opinion that's not political religious or moral?"
We are constantly inundated with marketing ads sneaking their way into our daily interactions on social media.
Enough is enough.
Audio Assualt In Ads
"Radio ads that have honking horns or sirens should be illegal. As should billboards."
Focus On The Product, Please
"If I buy a car, I want to own it without paying a subscription to use the radio or heated steering wheel."
"Ads with the skip button are more effective than ones without."
"If an ad has a skip button you can choose whenever you’re interested in said product or not. This provides more clear info to advertisers too."
"An unskippable ad makes a person associate the company with a negative experience, therefore downgrading the company."
When it comes to our well-being, these Redditors believe the following are of utmost importance.
Ready For The Weekend
"Weekends are sacred and you can pry my free saturday out of my cold dead hands. And even then good luck because i will have hot-glued it to my hands."
"Jokes aside, self care and de-stressing are important. Take care of yourself people!"
"Edit: for everyone saying this comment is indeed political/religious: i'm just saying that having some time off to recharge or take care of personal stuff is important. It does not matter when or how that time off is, as long as you have some. I just want people to be healthy."
It's Time To Let Go
"My boss asked me to come in on Saturday next month. Every Saturday. All month."
"In response, I took off all the Fridays. Due to corporate policy, he can’t deny it. At the end of the month, I’ll be quitting. This is the fifth time in less than a year he’s tried to get me to do regular overtime, and I’ve had enough. If he wants someone working on Saturday, he can do it himself."
"EDIT: I’m getting tired of all the people saying I should have 'just said no,' so let me explain why I didn’t."
"I’ve been at this company two years, and I’ve been 'just saying no' since day one. I was literally asked to stay late on my first day. For a while I did it because COVID had just started and I didn’t want to lose my job. I was very lucky to have a job at all and I knew it."
"But the demands for more overtime, more work, more responsibilities, it all kept growing. Soon, I was working 10 or 11 hours a day Mon-Sat and another 3 or 4 hours most Sundays. I was doing the work of three people and barely making enough money to live. Keep in mind I didn’t get paid for most of this overtime, maybe half of it. No OT bonus to speak of."
"Finally, after eight months of this, I put my foot down. I went back to 40 hour weeks, no overtime unless it’s payed and I choose to do it. My superiors weren’t happy, but replacing me wasn’t easy and they knew it, so they had to deal with it."
"Lately they’ve started pushing me to do more overtime again, but they still refuse to pay me for it. So, I’m done. I’m already planning on moving, but my plans to transfer to a different location are now out the window. I’m way past my limit with this company, they’re lucky I’m still here at all. So no, I won’t 'just say no.' I’ve been saying it for months and they don’t listen.
"Swimming should be taught to every child."
The following opinions are about our interactions with the public.
"If you take a sh*t at public toilets, FLUSH!!!"
The Stigma Of Naiveté
"People should learn that saying 'I don't know' is a perfectly acceptable thing to say, and very often the most accurate."
"Rerack your weights, you meaningless excuse for intelligent life!"
"Drivers who don't indicate when turning are selfish scum."
When using the elevator or public transportation, please let the passengers off before batter-ramming your way in, please.
The doors will eventually shut automatically but will not crush you if are entering the departed cabin at the last minute.
There's no rush.
That's the thing with people. Everyone's in a hurry to get from point A to B but cutting people off on the freeway or jamming your way into an emptying elevator will not get you places any faster.
Not only is it annoying, it's also dangerous.
And I'm done with my PSA. Thank you, kindly.
Some of these modern medicines can really pack a wallop.
Remember that Taylor Swift video her mom took of her?
That was too good.
Patients teeter between a laugh riot and a hideous, dramatic mess.
Either way, it's pretty entertaining.
Redditor DvS_Insanity wanted to hear about what we all mumble when under the influence before surgery.They asked:
"Anesthesiologists of Reddit, what was something you won’t forget hearing from someone that was under?"
I haven't really been under so deep I expressed these kinds of thoughts. I'm ok with skipping surgery, actually.
FingeredKung Fu Wtf GIF by A24Giphy
"I ask a patient after surgery how he feels. He opens his eyes, stares me dead-on and says 'with my fingers.' Then he goes right back to sleep."
'hand... hand please'
"I had an ovarian cyst removed a year ago and woke up from the anesthesia saying 'hand... hand please.' and making 'grabby hands' with both my hands until the nurses finally came over and held my hands for about five minutes while I just smiled and tried to go back to sleep. I hadn't done that in a decade. I used to do it to my dad all the time as a kid to express that I wanted to hold his hand while I slept."
'Ooo ithh a robot'
"My boyfriend at the time had just gotten his wisdom teeth removed, on the ride home with his mouth full of gauze, he gets a call on his cell phone. He answered it and just starts talking away, whoever it was on the other side could not possibly understand a word he was saying with all the gauze in his mouth. But man, he had a lot to talk about and they apparently didn't hang up..."
"After about 5 minutes of this unintelligible phone conversation, he looks at me and says 'Ooo ithh a robot' and gives me the phone. I put it to my ear, and the whole time it's been the Walgreens pharmacy automated notice simply stating his prescription is ready for pickup, playing on repeat. Probably for the best."
"I’m an anesthesiologist. The best story was a 40-some year old woman for appendectomy, said while I’m giving the propofol to induce anesthesia. She said 'oh I don’t remember it tasting like that before' (slurred). I said 'what does it taste like?' Since propofol doesn’t usually elicit a taste reaction. She almost yelled 'DEEEZ NUTS,' and was promptly under anesthesia thereafter. There have been other stories, but this one has the entire OR staff rolling laughing for minutes after she was under."
“AHHHH”Oh My Love GIF by WWEGiphy
"After an operation on a patient's neck, he woke up and yelled 'AHHHH' then grabbed his junk with both hands and was like 'oh thank God it’s still there' then immediately passed out again."
People are funny with no censor. And dialogue dangerous...
"My personal story. When I had my wisdom teeth out, I kept holding a fake camera up to my face saying 'you're beautiful' and making clicking noises while I was under. I'm a professional photographer and my dental surgeon ended up booking a session with me a year later."
"I woke up from gallbladder surgery confused as to why my mom wasn’t there (I was 18 and looking for my mom). The nurse informed me I had cussed out my entire family and they sent them home and put me on a no visitor list, only for me to wakeup at 2am with no memory making them call my mom back. Another time I woke up and made horrifically inappropriate jokes."
"I told a nurse she was pissing me off because I didn’t like the automatic blood pressure cuff. Another I refused to listen to followup orders until I had a chicken sandwich (my negotiations were not met). I’m a real treat after anesthesia but I get a lot of this done at the office my mom works at so she can warn them lol."
'That's my wife for ya'
"My aunt got rushed to the hospital for abnormal heart rate - but it wasn't a heart attack or stroke, but her heart was going at like 200 beats per minute or whatever it was. They had to put her under so they could shock her heart back to normal. As they're taking her under, the doctor says something like 'Okay, in it goes' and she immediately quips with 'That's what she said.' All the doctors and nurses busted a gut laughing and told my uncle when he got there. He just shrugged and said 'That's my wife for ya.'"
"One summer I was home from college and my dad needed me to pick him up after his very first colonoscopy. He was nervous so I got there early. The nurse called me back and asked me to help wake him up, as they were having some trouble. I go back and am making chit chat. 'Oh dad, you’ve got those cool booties on!' He raised his head a little bit to look at them then yelled, 'Booty call!' He is a Presbyterian pastor. A moment I will treasure forever."
HugsKat Graham Netflix GIF by GIF RegistryGiphy
"Apparently, when I had surgery to remove my Bartholin’s gland (a gland at the entrance of the vagina that can get an abscess), they asked me how I felt as soon as I was awake. I said I felt like I got attacked by an elephant and then I wanted to hug everyone."
Oh, the things we'll say when under the influence.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.