When I was young, if I spoke out of line my mother would make me eat soap. And not pleasant smelling Dove bars, disgusting, mustard yellow, industrial dish soaps. I always found that excessive. I maybe could've understood if I had the mouth of a trucker but I'm talking about a stray no or you suck here and there. I did learn a lesson, well several lessons. And I never acquired the mouth of a trucker, well... around her. I won't even get into when I briefly was an altar boy who assumed he was allowed to take hazard pay from the collection plate gatherings. Talk about punishment. I do believe the punishment should fit the crime, but so often the punishers seem to get lost in proving a point rather than paying a penance or consequence.
Redditor u/ZetamusMaximus thought we should chat about the times the punishment different fit the crime by asking..... What's the dumbest thing you've ever been punished for?
The Stink
perfume GIFGiphyI got sent out of drama class because the teacher told me my perfume made me smell like a cheap hooker and when I left the room she sprayed me with her own perfume on my way out.
"WHERE IS YOUR TITLE?!!!"
In college I once got a full letter grade off a paper because I had 7 sources instead of 5.
Same professor almost failed me because my presentation was supposed to be on the last possible day. I didn't actually pick the day I was presenting, by the way. Every presentation was on a different subject and he assigned dates to each one, you just had to pick the subject you were going to research and do the presentation on the day it was assigned. I picked the last one because it was something I was genuinely interested and knowledgeable in.
The day of my presentation comes up and I'm there with my laptop and a backup on a flash drive and he starts the class by saying "I don't want to do any more presentations. If you haven't presented by now you'll get a zero on the assignment," knowing full well I had signed up for that presentation months in advance and was the only person left. Had to go to the Dean and present proof that I had the presentation ready beforehand and that I had signed up for that presentation months in advance. We reached a compromise and I just got a B on the project without having to present.
Dude had it out for me and I'm not sure why, never will be. He even took a letter grade off a paper for my title because he didn't like.... something about it? Idk, he never even told me what his logic was, he just wrote "WHERE IS YOUR TITLE?!?!?" right next to my title which was very clearly up at the top of the page, centered, and following the format he had assigned us.
edit: Oh, senior year I got a very stern talking to from my professor in some bullsh*t class called "Health Through the Life Cycle". Why did I get such a stern talking to? We were having a discussion about whether or not we should allow polygamous marriages and I was the only person in the class against it.
a fat slice
When I was a teenager working at McDonald's a special order came back without tomatoes. So I made the sandwich and sent it up only to have a manager come back and yell at me for not putting tomatoes on the sandwich. He then slaps a fat slice of tomato on the sandwich and send it's up. Turns out an old lady was allergic and I got chewed out. The next day I got fired for it.
max greenfield no GIF by globaltvDuring a session I built a tower of wooden blocks and he insisted my parents punish me if it fell down.
Since it was a tower made of wooden blocks it fell down and I was punished (banned from playing SNES or something).
He was later banned from practicing psychology for some reason or other.
Deep Dislike
I had a teacher in middle school who just outright hated me. The day before a major project was due she had me show her what I had, and then proceeded to tell me I had done it all wrong. I went home and "corrected" it, staying up pretty late to change what she told me to.
So the first person goes up to present, and it's done JUST the same as I had done. Second person goes up, same thing. Then, when there's time for one more person to go, she looks around the room pretending to look for another person to go before her eyes lighting up as they rest on me, knowing I had done the assignment wrong due to her comments and now I can't go back home to do it right. So I go up and it looks like crap and I of course get a bad grade.
Nobody believed me that she had lied to me and when I of course got a bad grade, she finally had what she needed to make sure I was academically suspended from my sport causing me to break down in class. Later a different teacher overheard me talking crap about it and saying I'd love to get her back and I got expelled for threatening a teacher.
Lesson Learned
At my school we had to wear our ID's visibly (most wore it around the neck). This was the first year of the school requiring this, so it was new to everyone.
Around halfway through the first semester, I forgot my ID at home. We had block scheduling (half my classes one day, half the next) and I had two backpacks, one for each day. I put my ID away and forgot to transfer it to the next day's bag once I got home. Easy mistake to make.
Due to my parent's work schedules and the distance to school, I got dropped off super early, like over an hour before school started. I realized I was missing my ID, so I went to the office to get a temp one since there was absolutely no way of getting my ID from home.
I got it. But I also got detention. Which was the punishment for being caught without your ID.
Funny thing was I knew that if I just went to classes and stuff like normal the teachers probably wouldn't have noticed/cared that I didn't have my ID and there's a solid 90% chance I wouldn't have gotten any punishment at all for not having it.
So thanks school, you taught me that the punishment for trying to make things right for an honest mistake that doesn't hurt anyone is the exact same as not trying to make things right... only I'm guaranteed to get caught if I try to make things right. So it's better to conceal your mistakes and hope nobody notices.
Great lesson.
Damage
I was recently fired for following COVID safety protocols. A coworker was feeling ill, so I quietly gave her a thermometer to take her temperature. It was "damaging to the image of the company." We came to an agreement that if they honored my unemployment claim, I wouldn't tear them a new one.
Now I can get out of that industry and ensure my safety. I'm pretty cool with it in the long run. I was satisfied with our arrangement. Plus, even if I decided to sue and won the case, the publicity would possibly complicate my future employment opportunities. Also, I fear conflict.
Keep your 50!
Seth Meyers Goodbye GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphyAt my old job, I had my annual review. They told me that I did the work of 3 people and they loved me but because I used my sick/personal time earlier in the month (my kid was sick) that they 'really look down on employees that use the sick/personal without any prior authorization/notice.'
Then they had the balls to tell me if I know my kid is asthmatic that I should avoid taking any vacation hours in the summer (separate time off from sick/personal time) if I know he is going to get sick in the fall.
Instead of the bullcrap 50 cent raise, I only got 30 cents because of that. 50 cents was max.
I no longer work there.
Ruled
One of the requirements in my grad program is seminar attendance. There's sign in sheets that are collected during the seminar.
And then because someone who rigidly followed the rules did what they asked and emailed explaining their situation, that's how we found out they never checked them.
Multiple people missed that seminar. The only one who was chastised and warned by the administration was the one who let them know he wouldn't be there. Punished for following the rules.
God Bless
scared season 1 GIF by The White PrincessGiphyI started going to a sort of catholic club. One day, the rosary thing took a little longer. I got home one hour late and was grounded for three months. FOR PRAYING AT A CHURCH.
Being Social
Logging on to my personal Gmail on a school laptop. Because those were not for social media. I got a 3 day Suspension.
I remember a study hall teacher I had way back in high school flipped out about me using Facebook.
I had done all my homework, and not only that, another student near me was on Facebook and I could see papers sprawled out all over the desk.
To be fair, that teacher singled me out so goddamn much.
You're Sorry!!
incredulous excuse me GIFGiphyFinding a wallet in a mall. A woman started screaming while I pick up, accusing me of stealing. Security took me to their office, a hour later they let me go, saying she drop and was recorded.
Still waiting for apologies, was like six years ago.
No Coughing
Once coughed in class and the teacher ranted that she didn't expect me to have that sort of outburst (she thought I was laughing or crazy).
Okay this reminds me of the two separate times a teacher accused me of faking being sick for attention. In grades 3 and 7 I had a persistent cough that lasted for weeks. And both times after about the 3rd day my teachers convinced themselves I was doing it on purpose. First time was Pneumonia, second was Whooping Cough.
Day Camp Issues
I went to some summer day camp thing with an emphasis on sports when I was like 5. A bunch of my friends from school were there as well.
We were all just hanging out in the gym, I think playing basketball, when one of the counselors just abruptly rounded us up and put us in time-out. I assume it was something one of my friends did, because to this day I still have no clue wtf I did lol.
tanking....
I have epilepsy. I didn't call my work to let them know I couldn't make it that day, I was in the Hospital and could not get my cellphone. In hindsight I could have asked a Nurse to get me the number, but after a seizure i'm not thinking straight for a good 2 days or more.
Later, I get home and see I have numerous missed calls and texts, I ignore it all and wait until my next shift.
My boss calls me in and basically told me not to have another seizure. Since I never enrolled in FMLA (my fault) he claimed me having a seizure cost the company money. My brain messed up caused, a multi billion dollar company to lose money? I must be a top asset apparently..... Or these fools are about to tank.
Sing Out
mic singing GIFGiphyMy parents used to make me do singing competitions when I was in elementary/middle school. After hours of continuous practicing, I'd start forgetting the intricacies of the song (ie. trills, crescendos, whatnot) or I'd briefly zone out and mindlessly sing. Got grounded nearly every practice for that.
Looking Into It
One time this kid that constantly bullied me every day in middle school was bullying me at recess so I did what I was taught To do and stood up for myself and chased him away. Next thing I know he punches me hard in the stomach. I tell my mom after school and she drives me back to tell administration.
The school knew that I was always getting bullied and after "looking into it" my assistant principal for my grade and the principal sat me down at recess and told me it was my fault because I "instigated" it even though he was making fun of me. Then they told me the usual "if you kept your interests to yourself they wouldn't bully you". I didn't really get a punishment per say, just a slap on the wrist for expressing myself.
It's just a spill....
For spilling soda my teacher brought to the Christmas party. The 2 liter bottle was already shaken up, perhaps from the ride in her car. I didn't know this and soda spilled all over me, the carpet, and her mother's cooler that she deiced to bring. She turned red with anger and shouted at me, making the room go quiet and having all eyes on me (I understand that she was mad I got soda on her mother's cooler, but why bring it if this kind of thing were to be expected with 12-13 year old kids?).
Everyone watched me as she made me wet a cloth and try to clean the mess on the carpet as I cried (this was in 6th grade and when my anxiety was at it's absolute worst). No one was allowed to help me and it was so embarrassing for me. I got called "crybaby" after the whole ordeal.
After that, she tried to make it seem like it never happened and tried to be all buddy-buddy with me after that. I didn't talk to her for the rest of the year for anything, I was too scared of her after that. Looking back on it, it makes me angry how she dealt with the situation.
I'm a Nerd
One time in middle school I got suspended recess time for carrying a notepad.
It was 4th grade, and after lunch was recess time, go out and play and burn off some energy. Sometimes kids would get punished and not allowed to go out for recess, they would have stay inside.
I was feeling asocial that day, so I brought a notepad and pen to work on this D&D campaign I was running.
A teacher saw me carrying that, and just assumed it was because I was on suspended recess. I tried explaining that I just wanted to write outside, and asked her to find the person who ordered that punishment, but she didn't want to listen.
I wasn't too upset, as my goal was to sit quietly and write/brain storm, but it was still messed up as I felt like I was being punished for being a nerd.... would have been nice to be a nerd outside.
Wrong Answer
smh GIFGiphyFor having an anxiety attack brought on by the very teacher who then punished me for it and told me to get over it.
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Redditor H5N1BirdFlu wanted to discuss the moments in life that left us haunted and shook, so they asked:
"What is the creepiest or most unexplained event that you have ever experienced?"
I've seen so much creepiness I wouldn't know where to begin.
Deal
Walter White Wink GIF by Breaking BadGiphy"One car from one direction, and another car from the other direction stopped in front of my house. Both drivers got out and one gave the other a briefcase. Now that I am older I am guessing it was some kind of drug deal or something but at the time I found it very weird."
yapastaocho
'The Entertainer'
"We had a little copper music box that would start playing on its own. It was a man sitting at a player-piano and it would play 'The Entertainer' song. Now, I know that music boxes and such can spring (for lack of a better word) forward and play a few notes, but this thing would act like someone had wound it up and would play for a minute or two completely at random."
MercuryCrest
He?
"Me and and someone I used to know in high school way back when met to catch up. We were talking about our views on religion at some park. When we were walking back to our cars some guy said he had overheard us. We interacted a little and then went to our cars. I told her how awkward I felt knowing he overheard everything. She looked at me and said, 'He?'”
"After some comparing notes we realized we’d seen and heard entirely different people. She’d seen an elderly woman. I’d seen a middle aged man. Only problem is we only talked to the one person."
AccomplishedAuthor53
Overnight
"I usually go hiking and stay in the forest overnight, sleeping in a bivy and sometimes under a tarp. Now it's important to say I'm based in Europe. So no wild animals to be afraid of because usually they just boot it as soon as they notice you."
"So one winter night I'm sleeping under my tarp which connects to the ground on one side. It's in an area where there were fierce battles in the forrest on the border between Germany and Belgium in WWII."
"I hear something walking in the leaves, which is normal. There are always deer and ferral pigs on and about. But this time it comes closer and closer until I hear it right on the other side of my tarp and it starts growling. Its a noise I gad never heard and for a moment I was frozen trying to figure out what it might be and what to do."
"But I just decided to yell back and that did the trick. The animal walked a few steps and then turned back to growl once more before finally retreating."
"Let's put it this way, I didn't sleep for a while after that. I looked up the noise and think it was a badger."
Forest_Walkin
Devoured
Episode 4 Abc GIF by The BachelorGiphy"My family used to raise cattle. One morning I came out to check on them and I found one of the heifers had been more or less completely devoured."
"This same cow was perfectly fine the day before. There was nothing left but some hide, bones, and intestines. Thing is none of the predators that are in my area would be able to kill and eat an entire cow within the course of one night. Much less leave so little behind."
Aussieshepman
Poor cows. They live a rough life.
The Night Before
Get Out Omg GIF by Get Out MovieGiphy"When I was a kid, we lived in a kinda rural area. One night we came home late from an Uncle's house and there was a car parked up the road from our house with the headlights on."
"My mom suggested to my dad that we go see if they need help, he said no, so we went inside. Next morning police knocked on the door, a cyclist had spotted a body in the ditch exactly where the car was parked the night before."
Tpeest
Documents
"I have had a strange thing happen recently. I was waiting for my tax documents to come in so I could do my taxes. I had three documents that I put on my bedside table until I had the time."
"I decided to do it the other day and I couldn't find one of them. I tore the house apart, quizzed my husband (who swore he never touched it), checked the garbage, etc. I had resigned myself to the fact I would have to request another one, when it arrived in the mail."
"It was the same one, exact same information. I was really confused but grateful. I checked into it, it was not sent twice as far as the office could tell me."
"I don't know what to think. I KNOW I had that document because I had done some calculations with it. It's been itching at me like crazy."
monitormonkey
About 30 Feet
"A few months ago I was sitting in my living room on the couch, watching tv with a family member late at night. We have a high ceiling with a couple of rectangular windows at the very top of the wall just under where it meets the ceiling. The windows are so high (about 30 feet) we really only have them for natural lighting."
"So on the night in question, a green laser beam suddenly shown down through one of the windows, seemingly scanned the entire living room before stopping and pointing the beam right next to my family member for about 10 seconds and then disappearing entirely. It had to be either a drone or from some sort of flying aircraft. I live in a relatively secluded place which made the situation all the more unsettling."
0friday
Find Her
"Pretty sure I witnessed a kidnapping once and it still lives rent free in my head (the woman lost her slipper when she was trying to get away and i took a picture of it that i still have for some reason). I did indeed report it to police right after I saw it occur but they were pretty blasé about it and I never ended up being able to determine what they did to investigate."
ergaster8213
From Behind
the exorcist shadow GIFGiphy"I was in Jr High and had really long hair. I got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and almost tripped on a shoe on the floor. I bent down to move it and it felt like someone grabbed my entire pony tail and yanked it. I also could not sleep facing the wall for the longest time because it always felt like someone or something was right there behind me."
cheeseburgerphone182
Never face the wall. Life lesson.
These were some harrowing experiences, and we're glad these Redditors made it out to tell the story.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
Redditor NeedSomeSparkInLife wanted to know who would be willing to share, so they asked:
"What makes you not want to be intimate with your SO?"
I'm an easily turned off person.
So it doesn't take much.
Desire
Bored Season 5 GIF by The OfficeGiphy"Taking a moment to realize I'm the only one that makes sexual advances in the relationship. Makes me not want it. People think men only want sex for face value but a lot of men actually want the feeling of being desired more so."
Relative-Hour-9359
Anger Issues
"I've always heard of fighting then having sex after. Fighting has always made me not want it. The last thing I want to do when someone pisses me off is have sex with them. What made it worse is she always wanted to when we were arguing which made the argument worse when I refused."
DaMoonRulez_1
"I think you're supposed to resolve your fight, realize that you care for each other a lot, move past it, then have the passion because of that. Not fight right into sex."
Ksp-or-GTFO
Take a Shower
"My ex and I were together for nearly 7 years, but his hygiene never improved, so we stopped being intimate like, 3 years before I finally broke up with him. He showered only once a week, but he worked in kitchens, so he was sweaty and greasy all the time."
"He had an infected tooth, so he constantly had bad breath, but he refused to visit a dentist, even when he had the money to afford dental work. He stopped working out within the first year of us being together, which sucked because he would get jealous if I went to the gym by myself or with my girlfriends, but he refused to come with me."
GreenChorizo
Sober Time
"Personally, the only issue I have is my SO's drinking. He just becomes an unattractive person when he's drunk. It's one thing if we're both out socializing and drinking together occasionally, but he drinks almost every day, sitting on the couch in front of the TV and to the point of sloppy drunkenness way too often. His face changes, his posture changes, his personality changes... I just get so turned off."
WeptSiren3113
Hang Up
Art Hello GIF by LINDSEY L33Giphy"When they are glued to their phones non stop! Put that s**t down and look at me before we go to bed!"
Palmwine
"I really dislike this too. Makes me feel alone in the relationship."
RealBrownPerson
No phones in bed. Hard rule for many of us to follow.
Step Back
Be Quiet Go Away GIF by Ryn DeanGiphy"When I make a move, and then get the feeling she's not really in the mood/would only do it to please me. I want us both to have a good time, not only me. So when she seems not into it, I take a step back."
Level-Plate8372
Calm Down
"To be brutally honest, her anxiety and insecurity makes sex such a hassle. She doesn’t believe anything I say about wanting her, she can almost never relax during sex, she doesn’t take time to enjoy it, and if God forbid I have any trouble finishing, she takes it more personally than anything, which of course puts more pressure on me to finish, which then makes it almost impossible."
Ben_Franklinstein
When at Wal-Mart
"When they’ve done something really nasty/unkind that day. Cruelty is the most ugly thing a person can show, in my eyes. I had a boyfriend that I went to Wal-Mart with and he ended up flipping off and storming right past the sweet little old man that checks the receipts at the door."
"It was partially about how I used to check receipts and I remembered how I felt when people treated me like that- but I also remember the look on the little old man’s face and just how disgusted I was with my partner being so nasty about it."
"I couldn’t touch him after that and I got grossed out when he touched me. And then I started to notice how he was nasty to other people as well. It eventually led to our break up."
spxdergirl
33 Years In
"My husband used to dislike his job - he’d come home and do nothing but bi**h. After awhile, I just gave up trying to cheer him up with sex - you can only try so long. So, we had a long dry spell - like, whatever you think a dry spell would be, it’s longer. When someone is constantly annoyed, well, it’s hard to feel amorous."
"Anyway, he early retired (54) like a month before Covid kicked in and by autumn that year, well, let’s just say we’re back to what we were like when we first met. He’s not pissed off all the time. (I’m retired as well, and let’s just say, afternoon nookie is such a perk, as is morning nookie and 3am nookie because you can sleep in!) I’m glad we stayed together. Going on 33 years and we’re just so happy."
NicInNS
Rage
Angry Inside Out GIF by Disney PixarGiphy"Feeling angry. I hate feeling angry. I don't like being around other people when angry. So I'll go for a walk, a drive etc, and just clear my head."
jackfaire
It seems like "dead bed," as some folks call it, can stem from many things, from mood, attraction, hygiene, and more.
Do you have anything to add to this list? Let us know in the comments.