Sooey Pig Pig Pig

Six foot five and chubby beloved science-biology teacher in his late sixties who breeds his own lines of roses and other fauna. Played football at collegiate level then fought in a war.

Stupid spoiled redneck sixteen year old that can barely read who has rich farmer grandparents on both sides and thinks he is untouchable.

Teacher calls him in up to his desk and demands his notebook and homework assignments; complete or not.

Idiot grabs teachers ever-present giant coffee mug from the desk. Yells "Sooey pig pig pig!" and splashes coffee in teachers face.

Idiot runs for the door giggling like a madman but doesn't make it. Gets tossed out of the classroom door so hard he hits the opposite wall in the hall and we hear him squealing and crying down the hall as he is repeatedly caught and kicked in the a** by a giant.

He kept his job.

-GroverCheeseland

Mousetraps

This was years ago, but in high school shop class. Teacher was a grizzly ole Vietnam vet who didn't take s*** from anyone. For a clearer picture, he liked to start the first day of class talking about safety around tools, gesturing wildly, then proceed to "accidentally" jam a carpenters knife all the way into his leg. Of course it freaked the f*** out of everyone until he showed us it was wooden and it was to show us to always respect the tools or you could easily f*** yourself up.

We had one kid who was always a dirtbag. Constantly talking, distracting other students, talking back, sleeping... just generally being a douchey little "thug". Well our teacher was going over a project we were gonna start, mousetrap cars. We were gonna be working on them using bandsaws and other dangerous equipment. Kid just lays his head down and starts snoring. He wasn't really asleep, just being a douche. Teacher set 3 mousetraps, and threw them straight at the kid. 1 clipped his ear, another hit his thumb, and the last missed.

A stunt like that would get a teacher fired nowadays but I'll tell you one thing, he didn't act like a douche in his class after that.

-Abeno_police

Inhumane Humanities Teacher

Oh hang on for the ride. I had a humanities teacher in middle school who would hand out McDonalds applications to students who failed her tests, but that's kid stuff. A friend of mine cried after a test (middle school hormones) and the teacher told her she was screwed because her only shot was stripping and she's too fat. But who would believe a teacher said that? The thing that finally got her fired was back to back incidents in which she threw a desk across the room and kicked over a drum a student was carrying from class to class.

-Jacknife8989

Racist Teacher Rant

My 10th grade English teacher had a mental breakdown/racist rant in the middle of class. She's white and our school population at the time was 76% black. I can't remember exactly what was said but the teacher made some sly racist comment and no one really caught onto it - except one girl.

When the girl called her out, the teacher just lost her s*** and started babbling on with racist comments. The entire class was in a absolute uproar. Security was called and eventually the police because it kept escalating. Students were actively searching for her throughout the school. That was the last time anyone ever saw her.

- DrGiggleFr1tz

Hissing And Yelling - For The Right Reasons

Said she could fly, and challenged us to believe her. When someone tentatively asked her how, she climbed up on the desk and jumped off, flapping her arms. Then she talked about scientific process.

Also owned something like 70 rescue animals. Would bring one in each week on a rotation- hamster, tarantula, etc. Can you imagine how her house smelled?

But she could also be really cool. This poor kid in our class had some serious social disorder that made him really awkward/loud. Some redneck prick kicked him so hard that he got a testicular injury of some sort. I was late to class and didn't witness it, just the aftermath.

Teacher came into the class and found him curled up under a desk crying. She got him immediate medical attention and then locked the classroom door, turned to us all, and chewed us out until she outed the perpetrator. I have rarely seen an adult be so scary. After the kid got hauled off to the office, she kept us locked in that room, alternately hissing and yelling about violence to others, accountability, standing up for others, etc. She even cried in front of us. No one looked each other in the eye for a long time.

She's no longer a teacher. Works at the health food store in town.

-MidLifeCrackers

I Before E

Lost it totally in the middle of 4th grade class. Stood in the middle of the room clapping her hands and chanting "I before E except after C!" and would not stop. The music teacher finally came in and led her away, and we never saw her again.

- Bellamy1715

Art Teacher Restraining Order

Art teacher threw a metal stool at a student. Soon after he "retired".

The next art teacher was his son. Who then proceeded to hit on high school freshman and made fun of art work done by special Ed students (to the kids face). He got fired real quick. Father art teacher then harassed the other art teacher in the school, due to his sons termination, which resulted in a restraining order and him being banned from the school property.

-Melda09

A Forced Confession

We had a substitute teacher in high school one day. It was for the last period of the day too. He was short, stocky, balding, looked similar to George Costanza from Seinfeld.

Anyway, the class is going well, everyones relaxed since we have a sub, the sub was pretty cool. I remember he asked a question about why his head is shiny (because people asked I think) and I was the only one who knew the answer apparently; oils on his scalp, its normal.

I thought we hit it off and it was all good. Anyway, fast forward to the end of the class. Hes writing something on the board and someone throws a balled up piece of paper at him. He gets immediately infuriated. Thinks we've been making fun of him the entire time and he's just been trying to keep his cool. He loses it, he's throwing chalk and erasers, he shakes and pushes the teachers chair, then he demands that whoever threw it came forward.

This goes on for about 15 minutes before the final bell rings and we're supposed to go home. I can't remember if he locked the door or stood in front of it, but he said he's not letting anyone leave until the person confesses (so he could tell on them.)

The bell rings, nobody confessed yet, we're all sitting in our seats, hes staring at me like he knows I did it (I didnt do it - im not that much of an a$shole) and I basically talk with him, "You can't really keep us here forever, if we miss our buses you're going to be the one in trouble for 30 students missing the bus." and he still is adamant that nobody is leaving until he gets a name.

I look around the room to see if anyone looks guilty, nobody really does, and I cant think of who would have done it. I don't have patience when it comes to going home right on time, nor dealing with childish antics. I stand up and put on my bookbag, I say to the substitute, "Yeah, it was me, now can we go?" he lets us leave and writes my name down on a piece of paper.

"YOURE GOING TO BE IN BIG TROUBLE!!" he says as I walk out of the class room with everyone. I just shook my head, because that entire thing makes him look so foolish. My friends are laughing and some ask, "Dude did you throw it?!" "That was awesome!" I just said, "F*** no man, that's mean, he was a nice dude."

The next day the real teacher returns and sits me down, "What is this I hear about you throwing stuff at the back of the sub's head before the end of class the other day?" -- Thus I had to explain again that I took the fall for whoever truly did it, because I dont have that sort of patience. And I wasn't going to have my dad drive all the way to school to pick me up because some teacher had a napoleon complex.

I don't know if he believed me or not, but it kind of bothered me. I don't like lying, I don't like taking the fall for cowards, I don't like people being mean to other people and bullying, just everything that I hate about humanity happened in that class.

-Trucido614

Dentures

My 8th grade science teacher bit me on the shoulder and left his dentures on me when he pulled his head back.

-PerryTheFridge

Dead Son Delusions

Physics teacher when I was in 12th grade. It was her first year back after being out a few years. No one knew why she had taken several years off. Every class she would spend at least five minutes, sometimes ten or even fifteen, gushing about all of her son's accomplishments. This woman was really proud of her son. Fine and all but can we learn? She wasn't even that great of a teacher and the class mostly struggled.

More than halfway through the year someone found out the reason she had taken several years off. Her son was in a horrible accident and had passed away. She had a mental breakdown and couldn't teach. She talked about her son like he was still alive every day to us. Someone reported it to the school and they made her leave. We got stuck with some unqualified substitute teacher the rest of the year. More than half the class failed the final exam. I myself barely passed with a 70.

- CafeSilver