There are some sayings and so-called "wisdoms" that need to go.
Like... "You'll use Geometry one day."
LIES!
As much as we're trying to always stay on the bright side, the gloomy is necessary to hear.
Redditor adventureofanunnamed wanted to clear out all the crap when it comes to the old adages. So they asked:
"Which old saying is actually a bulls**t?"
The truth shall set you free. That is a lie. I can attest.
Told you so...
Calculating Oh No GIF by MOODMAN
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"You won't always have a calculator on you."
IsakTS
"I told my teacher this wasn't true anymore because most kids have phones now, anyway I'll be in the office on Monday for being a smart-a**."
aidenpearce11908
Don't Judge
"It's all good in the hood. It is not."
I_Use_Games
"Hood isn't all bad. There are upsides like that the community takes care of each other and crap. Idk why redditors are judging it so hard since 99% haven't even been there."
gilbertthelittleN
"That's true I'll try to stop judging without knowing. I just have some friends who live there and when I voice chat with them I always hear like 3 police sirens."
ShiveredMyTimber
Cash Flow
"Do what you love and the money will follow."
Billiam201
"This is quoted by people who love starting businesses, and they don't realize that they are extremely lucky that their natural inclination is in line with societal expectations and reward systems."
mattsprofile
Winning!
“'Winners never cheat and cheaters never win.' Yeah, bulls**t. Cheaters almost always win."
Reloaded9mm
"If you're cheating and still losing then you're cheating wrong."
irrimn
"I remember cheating during a Monopoly game as a kid, it felt great because I was the boss. At the end, everything felt apart and I lost pretty badly. To this day, I still see it as an example to never cheat in a boardgame ever. Also, even if you win, it feels too dirty."
Thierry22
Mirror, Mirror
Sexy How I Met Your Mother GIF by Laff
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"looks don't matter"
"I've noticed that this is usually said by people who are attractive themselves. That's like someone born rich saying that money doesn't matter."
RadiantHC
We're so obsessed with looks. But that's not a surprise. But looks can matter.
Bow Down
The Lion King GIF by Walt Disney Studios
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"'Lions are king of the jungle.' They don't live in the damn jungle."
turbo2thousand406
Bad Things
"Good things happen to good people. Crock of crap that is."
Bhuygv-123
"Honestly some of the nicest people I know have had the most unfortunate sh*t happen to them. A lot of the time it feels like the people who don't deserve nice things are the ones who do get them."
novalunaa
Healthy Habits
"Feed a cold, starve a fever. Just eat nutritious, easy to digest foods when you're sick (and stay hydrated). As for the people who are telling me my version is incorrect, I can tell you that its the one I heard growing up, and the internet seems to confirm that it is indeed a saying (though starve a cold, feed a fever also seems to be a thing)."
"https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/fact-or-fiction-feed-a-cold/"
"https://www.icare-er.com/true-or-false-feed-a-cold-starve-a-fever/"
hyren82
Life Expectancy
"Only the good die young."
LucyVialli
"This is a fairly common saying in the infantry. Mostly because the good ones are the ones who’ll stick their necks out because they care and go the extra mile to protect their guys. While the bad ones. Well they don’t care. But they tend to live longer because of it."
Jesterzoop
Higher Ups
State Of The Union GIF by GIPHY News
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"'Age brings wisdom.' We have an Congress, Senate, and a bunch of aging baby boomers that prove that wrong."
CLWho83
No Backup...
"Do something you love, and you'll never work a day in your life. Bullsh*t, now what used to bring my joy is miserable and I don't have a backup career."
Suremayb
"Much better advice What I spent my youth so very excited about, I try to check at the door and not think about in my off time. I don't tell people what I do. Way more interesting things to talk about."
NoUserName2468
Faster
"Slow and steady wins the race… yet I always lose the kahoot"
daanimas
"I used to be in track, and there was a certain race i was running, which I was not doing well in. some parent from off the track just tells me 'slow and steady wins the race!!' as if this wasn't a literal race in which going slow means you undoubtedly lose. I still have no idea why she said that."
barndelini
One Leg
"My grandmother used to say, 'That man is as worthless as a one legged man at an ass kickin'.' Well, I worked at a mental facility. One day I saw a one legged man absolutely destroy another dude. Popped him in the head with his crutch, then pitched forward and just stomped on him with his one leg."
Spodson
Irony
happy reno 911 GIF by Comedy Central
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“Pull yourself up by your bootstraps.”
"It’s meant as an ironic/satirical phrase, because it refers to an act which is literally impossible."
ChimpskyBRC
$$$
"'Money can't buy Happiness.' No, but it can buy the freedom, time and funds that allow me to pursue the things that do make me happy."
Solafuge
"Even if money doesn’t make someone happy, lack of money can certainly make someone unhappy, so it does certainly make a massive difference."
Craven_Hall
thick
"Blood is thicker then water... Always hated it, crappy family members."
BasicallyThatGuy1015
"Mud is thicker than blood. It has a nice ring to it but i'm thinking it's meaningless..."
hirsutesuit
"Maple syrup is thicker than blood so pancakes are more important than family."
scottmaclean24
No Weirdo
wo glenn close GIF
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"If at first you don't succeed try, try and try again. Don't follow that advice when dating. You will be branded as a stalker/creep."
i-need-blinker-fluid
Fiasco
"Recently had a huge familial... Fiasco. Couldn't relate to this more. Got a couple family members that I'm about three seconds from going no contact with due to circumstances/situations of their own making, 100% their choices that led them here. But I'm the bad guy for not coddling them from the consequences of their own actions... The people in question are all over 40 and should damn well know better."
tkd_or_something
SCORE!!
"Go big or go home. You have no idea how bad I just want to go home."
Best_Detective_2533
"At least you have the choice of going home. When I was in school, sports carnivals were mandatory, so if you weren't an athlete, tough sh*t. Forcing kids to participate in sportsball, talent be damned, is slavery, and no amount of participation trophies will ever make it okay."
umatbru
“meant to be”
Video Game Ubisoft GIF by Far Cry 6
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“'If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be.' If you let something go, it was probably for a good reason. Better to move forward without it than to live in limbo."
"Edit to clarify that I’m not at all opposed to letting go. I’m opposed to assuming something is 'meant to be' just because it keeps showing back up at your door."
This is a good list. I'd rather truth than fiction any day.
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When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.