People Divulge The Most Genuine Things You Can Say To Someone Suffering From Depression
Thiago Barletta on Unsplash

Depression sucks.

It's hard to live with and near impossible to overcome.

I know, I struggle everyday.

It's always appreciative to have people who "try" to empathize.

But often the sentiment doesn't fit the delivery.

There are ways to comfort a sad person that doesn't make it worse.

I know you're trying your best.

But let's make your best... the greatest.


RedditorHeavy-Strain32wanted to discuss the best ways to help a person suffering.

They asked:

"What's the most genuine thing you can say to a person going through depression?"

I always appreciate someone willing to cry with me. That is a big help. Just a suggestion.

Genuine

‘"It’s really difficult isn’t it.' I loved this line that my therapist said when I was sharing my struggles. There was no judgment, no advice, just felt like I was genuinely being heard."

xlOREOlx

Season 4 Hug GIF by Good GirlsGiphy

Best Way

"This is like my favorite show of sympathy/empathy I've ever witnessed. Zuko hearing Sokka tell him about his girlfriend: "that's rough, buddy."

"Not saying sorry for your loss and putting the weight of saying 'it's ok' on the one experiencing the pain, no 'here's a relevant story of mine to show how I can relate' just..."

"'Sh*t man, the thing you went through was rough and you're justified for feeling this way.'"

Exodan

I miss that guy...

"My boss once said to me 'there's nothing wrong with what you're feeling - you're sick. And it's not something that's easy to live with. don't feel bad because you have an illness you can't fix - you wouldn't expect someone with cancer to feel bad, would you?' He then gave me a man hug and we had beers and a vent session for three hours. I miss that guy."

frothy_Wombat

Basics

“I’m grilling tonight, wanna come over?”

"Honestly, when I’ve been depressed there is a double layer of shame. Being treated as a friend just like any other made it feel like I was still part of society and community. Being treated with mittens makes you feel even more worthless and a pariah."

ThinkIGotHacked

Love

"I love you buddy. Friend of mine said it to me when I was struggling. It was instantly disarming of my bad thoughts and still resonates with me now. I find it hard to say myself though as I never really had a male role model growing up."

alidaf

Happy Season 3 GIF by FriendsGiphy

All great suggestions so far. Empathy is easy...

Possibilities

"Anything that isn't a variation of 'think positive.' The illness makes it literally impossible. I liked to hear that I still meant something to the people in my life, despite me not being able to give."

raxeira-etterath

Sacha Baron Cohen Thumbs Up GIF by Amazon Prime VideoGiphy

The Moments

"It's the hugs that don't even need said. At my last job I was in a dark place at the time and slipping back into depression. My blow up at work went from work issues to issues in my life and I didn't realize how far I went and my sauté guy held me. It's the most human moment I've had and it broke me in a good way. Sometimes just having a moment of that same feeling of connection, physical or not, can be what saves and/or helps that person."

Bfab94

no obligation...

"I’m not the best person to come to with these problems so when people around me do have that I always tell them the same thing, 'Want to go fishing? I’m bringing a grill and some charcoal.'"

2Agunsarearight

"We all get taken off guard, especially if you didn’t notice any changes in their behavior before. Often just a simple invite to hang out (no obligation) can be enough to remind somebody they aren’t alone and have a friend."

JakeFromFarmState1

“I understand”

"Lots of conflicting stuff here, because I’m seeing many suggest 'I understand' - but to me I hated hearing that. I always felt like 'no you don’t. You may know what it’s like to be in your own version of hell, but not mine.' For me, I think I always preferred those who said 'I want to try to understand' or just a simple 'love you' or 'want to hang out and not talk to each other at all and watch scrubs?'"

Iamdogfather

Simple

"I might not understand what you're going through, but I'm here for you and I love you."

tarkinlarson

I Love You GIF by Taylor SwiftGiphy

Ways to be there. Chapter One....

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Photo by Fred Moon on Unsplash

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Battlecreek Coffee Roasters on Unsplash

Good smells and bad smells are generally considered pretty universal, but there are definitely some outliers.

Most people can't stand the smell of gasoline, but there are quite a few people who find the smell pleasant.

Redditor Psycho_Bunny_Cutie asked:

"What's a weird smell you're willing to admit you like?"

Skunk

"Skunk"

"Not getting sprayed directly because I've never had that happen so I don't know if I'd like it, but the lingering aftermath."

"My friend's dogs got sprayed and I helped get them bathed. It almost drove them out of their house, but I liked the smell. It lingered for months."

- LakotaGrl

Giphy

​Disney Home Video

"I remember liking the smell of Disney VHS cases."

- AtlUtdGold

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- el-mil

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- lubs96

Friends' Homes

"​I dont know if this counts, where I used to live is very common to hug people all the time, and if I have been in someone's home before, the place would have a particular smell, and almost everytime I would hug them, they would smell like their home. It always felt good to make that association, it was comforting somehow."

- Montpierce

"Same for me, and then when you're out and about and you catch a wiff of something that smells the same even if it's been years they pop into your mind."

- loonettt

New Tech

"​The smell of brand new tech gadgets. It smells of technology. Whenever I buy a new mouse or keyboard (it is especially true for logitech products I don't know if it is a general thing) I sniff them as long as I can detect that sweet plastic-y, ultra clean-smelling goodness."

- bobisz

"Back when CD's were the dominant form of data transfer, I would LOVE every time a new one was opened, just sniffing the new CD."

"Years later, I discovered a nearly identical (to me) smell that works just as well... fresh saffron. Saffron smells like new CD's to me, and I love it."

- ConnectionIssues

Mimeograph Solvent

"Ah, back in the old days, the smell of papers that the teacher handed out that were fresh off those old hand-cranked mimeograph machines. The solvent. Mmmm."

- whazzup_b*tches

Fast Times At Ridgemont High GIF by FilminGiphy

Pool Toys

​"Pvc pool toys when you're unfolding them before you blow them up."

- NoticeWhenUAreHappy

"I bought a shower curtain the other day and instead of a light plastic smell it smelled heavily of inflatable pool toys, best shower ever."

- I_PEE_WITH_THAT

Basements

"I love the smell of basement- which I don't know if is weird, but I'm the only one I know who likes it."​

- AmeliaUsesReddit

"Yessss, also sometimes underground parking garages or stairwells have it. Everyone always thinks I’m an idiot when I bring it up."

- Fenzik

​Home Depot

​"The smell of Home Depot"

- lanuevagringa

"I have long been hoping for Yankee Candle to team up with Home Depot to a lumber aisle scented candle."

- MintyFreshBreathYo

​Hot Pavement And Rain

​"Hot parking lot when it first starts to rain."

- TheUSForestService

"The best! I can smell it now. Thanks for that. That smell in a sun shower is like the best feeling you could ever feel."

- uffdathatisnice

​Burnt Matches

​"Matches after the flame goes out."

- makeful

"Ooooh I like the smell when you blow out a candle."

- Kaisa_is_short

Lighting Up GIF by GifGariGiphy

While there are some smells that seem like everyone must hate them, there's always going to be someone who thinks they smell better than roses.

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Jack B / Unsplash

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