People Reveal Which Non-Horror Movies Absolutely Traumatized Them As A Kid
Reddit user alina_love_ asked: 'What's a non horror movie that traumatized you as a kid?'
No matter how long ago we saw it, there are some scenes or images from movies that still send shivers down our spine or keep us awake at night to this very day.
Pennywise appearing in the sewer in It, Janet Leigh surprised in the shower in Psycho, Freddy Kreuger's tongue popping out of the telephone in A Nightmare on Elm Street.
Of course, some of the scariest, most disturbing, or most emotionally traumatizing scenes from films might have been featured in films outside of the horror genre.
Even more shockingly, some of these films were primarily marketed towards children!
Redditor alina_love was curious to hear which non-horror films the Reddit community saw as children still send shivers down their spines today, leading them to ask:
"What's a non horror movie that traumatized you as a kid?"
It Was Tim Burton, After All...
"'Pee Wee's big adventure'."
"Large Marge scared the crap out of little me."
"I was even scared of the fortune teller."- BlueStarrSilver·
With A Title Like "Temple Of Doom"...
"'Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom'."
"The scene where the guy gets his heart ripped out traumatized me for years."- Pbhf
That Funeral Scene Though...
"'My Girl'."
"Fear of death, fear of losing a friend, fear of bees, fear of puberty."- heidismiles
macaulay culkin kiss GIFGiphyJurassic Park's Got Nothing On This...
"'The Land Before Time'."
"Watching Little Foot’s mother die was awful."- HourglassSass
He'll Always Regret Not Bringing Her To The Museum...
"'Bridge to Terabithia'."- jumpstart-the-end
"Everything goes so well and it falls apart SO FAST and your left absolutely traumatized."- VortexDestroyer99
The Reason People Hold On To Their Appliances For As Long As They Do...
"The Brave Little Toaster'."- Catgurl
"The junkyard scene alone was responsible for so many nightmares."- ManChildMusician
brave little toaster animation GIF by Coolidge Corner TheatreGiphyAnd Let's Not Forget The Coachman's Smile...
"Disney’s version of 'Pinocchio'."
"The scene where kids are turned into donkeys and kept on the island and then resold was f*cking weird."
"You felt bad for that bully kid after he looked sad and nobody understood what he said because he was a donkey."- earnestlikehemingway
Few Things More Sad And Scary Than Deforestation
"'Ferngully: The Last Rainforest'."
"That evil tree scared me so bad."- slutsdotnet
Anything But "Truly Scrumptious"...
"The 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' Childcatcher guy!"
"I'm still scared of him!"- Jet_Maypen
child GIFGiphyOffing Children One By One...In A Children's Movie!
"'Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory' boat scene."
"Honorable mention of claustrophobia when Augustus gets stuck in the chocolate tube."
"UGH!"- looseseal-bluth
At Least We Know He Had A "Sole"...
"Who Framed Roger Rabbit."
"That poor shoe….."- dalalice5555
At Least The Song Is Catchy...
"Neverending Story."
"Not even Artax, which was awful, but the Rockbiter and his good strong hands."- marxychick1
Neverending Story 80S GIFGiphyDorothy Gettying Electro Shock Therapy Says it All...
"Return to Oz."- Jeff_Steelflexx
"Horrifying! What about the animated wig heads?"- weensfordayz
The Reigning King Of Childhood Trauma
"Old Yeller."- IceTech59
"I remember watching this on TV during, I think, Wonderful World of Disney (Sunday nights were Disney night on TV)."
"Cried and cried and cried."
"I've never been able to watch it again and I've never shown it to my kids!"- crowwitch
Not All Friendships Are Tenable... A Terrifying Thought
"'The Fox and the Hound'."
"Still makes me incredibly sad, lol."- mental_reincarnation
best friends friendship GIFGiphySometimes, writers and filmmakers simply overestimate what might go over a child's head.
Or, for that matter, they might underestimate their emotional capacity.
Regardless, ask any of Fairuza Balk's fans which is scarier, Return to Oz or The Craft, and their answer will be immediate...
(... and it won't be The Craft...)
People Explain Which Things From Their Childhood No Longer Exist Today
Reddit user lil-gatorwrangler asked: 'What is something from your childhood that no longer exists now?'
When I was a little girl, I adored the American Girl books. These were books about girls in different historical periods of time in America. They weren't just books, however. There was a lot of American Girl merchandise, including dolls.
I adored the doll I had of Felicity Merriman, my favorite American Girl. A few years ago, I started reading the American Girl books to my cousin. She had her own favorite character, Samantha, and I decided it would be nice to get her a Samantha doll for her birthday. I went to order one only to find out they had archived the dolls of the four original American Girls, including Felicity and Samantha.
Eventually, new versions of the dolls were re-released, but they looked completely different from the characters from the books, which the original dolls captured. These dolls are just one thing that existed in my childhood that no longer exists.
I'm not the only one who has experienced these. Redditors have identified plenty of things from their childhood that no longer exist and are eager to share.
It all started when Redditor lil-gatorwrangler asked:
"What is something from your childhood that no longer exists now?"
Breakfast Gifts
"Cool spoons from cereal boxes!!! i miss the color changing and straw ones."
– pompomcinnamon
"Nothing like only buying a box of cereal because of the cool lil gift inside. 🥹"
– lil-gatorwrangler
"This reminds me I haven't seen my Taz spoon in a while. It makes Taz noises when you dip it in milk."
– TransformerTanooki
Family Phones
"Yelling “SOMEBODY GET THE PHONE.”
– Jfonzy
"Adjacent: “Get off the internet! I have to make a phone call!”"
– cold_dry_hands
"The ring tone was......the phone."
– DEADFLY6
Slime!
"Nickelodeon game shows. I miss Legends of the Hidden Temple and Guts."
– ShawshankException
"Every time I have to take a headrest out and put it back in my car seat, I pretend I am completing a mission from LotHT."
– ReineDePlatine
Ah, The Book Fairs
"Do you remember filling out book orders when it was time for your school's book fair? :'("
– sn0wballa
"Omg yes!!! And just say dreaming about all the books I could have, if I could afford it lol."
– FlannelPajamas123
"Oh my god the happiest days of my school year."
– clover219
Cell Phone Plans
"I remember when cell phones were newish and scheduling your calls to after 7 on weekdays and anytime on weekends because nights and weekends were free and didn't count toward your monthly allotment of minutes. You also only had a limited amount of texts per month included in your plan."
–cartertucker
The Old Food Options
"Wendy's salad bar."
– SirBlack_
"Wendy’s 4 for $4. Rip 🥲"
– lil-gatorwrangler
Toy Stores
"KB toys."
– AcademicSavings634
"It always felt so cramped and jam packed full of stuff that every time you went you felt like an explorer."
– MrMojoFomo
"I worked at KB Toys throughout college. Can confirm that cramming stuff in there was a corporate policy, maybe for exactly this reason."
"Had to be careful going exploring though— more than once I found a dirty diaper someone had hidden behind a bunch of Barbies. I feel like everyone should work retail for at least a little while, so they can get a taste for what monsters people really are."
– Engelbettie
"Toys-R-Us. I miss that place. I remember my dad taking me and I’d just wonder through the aisles amazed at all the toys. I got one of my childhood favorite Barbie dream houses there."
– FrostQueen05
A Thousand Words
"Photo Albums. My mother has been cataloging some of the old photos she never got around to putting in albums recently. It is a different experience than looking through someone's phone at curated pictures. You would get the pictures back and 90% of them would go in the album. No editing, no my hair looks like crap. You would find photos of yourself years later that you never knew existed. When your grandparents die and you start looking through albums for their memorial and can reminisce. It is so nice."
– HighFiveYourFace
Christmas Was Never The Same
"I recall hearing about a concept mentioned in movies known as a 'Christmas bonus.'"
– mockhouse
"I actually worked at a place where I got to see the idea of a Christmas bonus die."
"They had, for years, given out a Christmas bonus the 2nd week of December that was a cash bonus equivalent to about 1 week's pay. It wasn't huge but it was just that little extra for people already living paycheck to paycheck to have something to buy the wife and kids some Christmas presents."
"Then one year some dude in management came up with this really awesome idea: Instead of giving each employee a couple hundred dollars in cash we should totally give them a frozen turkey."
"It will be great! everyone needs a frozen turkey for Christmas dinner and we can order a whole semi truck trailer full of of them for a great bulk discount so they only cost like $20 each... employees win and we save money!"
"So that is what the company did."
"Only they did't tell anyone that was what was going to happen until the truck backed into the loading dock and happy managers started handing out frozen chunks of discount birds to people who had been budgeting their entire Christmas shopping on getting the cash instead."
"Christmas morning the owner of the company woke up to find hundreds of rotting turkeys on their front lawn."
"We never got a Christmas bonus again at that company - cash or cold turkey."
– varthalon
MY Personal Info
"Privacy. Mostly in the sense that we didn’t have big Meta mining our data/location/listening."
– ilike2makemoney
Weekend Mornings
"Saturday morning cartoons. Nothing beat the joy of waking up early in Saturday morning to watch five hours of your favorite cartoons, most of which were only on at that time on that day."
– nijaxi4567
"I know what you mean. There are cartoons on Saturday morning but with cable and YouTube and streaming and because those run 24-7, it isn’t an event."
"Few things beat running downstairs, pouring yourself a huge bowl of sugary cereal, and flipping on a full hour of Ninja Turtles, Garfield, Ghostbusters, and topping it off with Saved By the Bell all while your parents slept in."
– vmikey
Movie Night
"Blockbuster movie rental."
– lordharliquin
"Oh. My favorite thing we used to do is we would go to the video store and blindfold one of us and pick out a movie and just watch something random. It was so fun fun!"
– darforce
"I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS!! Those are some of the best memories from my childhood! So much better than Netflix!"
– betaflc
No Streaming
"Yelling "IT'S OOOOOOOON" as your siblings hurtled themselves back into the living room and across the couch after the ad break. That 'will I make it' few minutes of just not knowing if you had time to both pee and ALSO get kitchen snacks, were andrenaline-inducing."
– wildgoats2345
That was me and my brother as we watched Avatar: The Last Airbender. Sometimes, I really miss those days!
Things Parents Do That Unknowingly Screw Their Children Over
Ioann-Mark Kuznietsov on Unsplash
Parenting isn't a simple job.
The health, safety and well-being of another human being is on the line. Eventually that human will enter society with all the lessons or traumas of their childhood shaping them.
That's a lot of responsibility.
But even the most well-meaning parents can mess up.
Reddit user RunningInAHurricane asked:
"What do a lot of parents do that unknowingly screws their children over?"
Because I Said So
"Not taking the time to explain themselves on certain topics."
"The whole 'do as I say because I said so' or 'because I had you' is not effective."
~ LiteLit
"Yes! Rules should always have valid rationales behind them. Ones that you can explain fully."
"'Your room must be clean: building habits and routines makes life way easier and keeping a clean house can help reduce the chance of injury from tripping or pests'."
"Bedtime is 8: sleep is very important for our health. If we dont get enough, we het cranky and dont function as well'."
"Yadda yadda. Adjust for age."
"And you can build in safe phrases for times when your kids need to listen and follow directions without question. These are used like this: 'if I ever grab your arm and say "apples aren't oranges" you need to do as i say because it is a matter of your own safety. Once we are safe, I will explain'."
~ Lostintranslation390
Selective Memory
"Forgetting what it was like to be that age, and expecting their kids to react differently to things than them when they were that age."
~ MunkRubilla
"People are quick to forget what being a teenager is like."
"It's hard on the body physically and mentally just from the hormones, all of their friends are going through the same sh*t, and they're also desperately trying to find their place in the world at the stage in between childhood and adulthood."
~ Cautious_Hold428
Critical Thinking
"Not teach them to think for themselves."
"They need to think independently from other people."
"My favorite thing my parents taught me was to not have a hive mind mentality and think things through before believing and using them."
~ GimmiwCoconut
"I'm 24 and recently visited family for a week.
"It's amazing how my mom immediately started trying to make my choices for me regarding what I do, wear, and eat."
"It's not malicious on her part, it's just a force of habit. But my God is it infuriating."
~ DisposableCharger
Failure Is An Option
"They fail at letting their kids fail and figure out how to recover."
"It prevents the kids from becoming resilient."
~ BS623-902
"This starts when they're little."
"You have to let the 2 year old struggle with the toy or puzzle and not just do it for them when they start to cry and get frustrated."
"It's okay for your kids to cry about being frustrated, you don't need to immediately stop it."
~ lexrp
Inside Voice
"Shouting at them instead of having a conversation."
~ therapoootic
"My husband is incapable of just having a conversation with our 15-year-old son."
"He's always shouting because he doesn't like the way our son looks at him or because he feels he's not being shown respect."
"This all boils down to him projecting his frustrations, as he can't shout at people at the office or on the street."
"So he does it at home. It's annoying."
~ DisastrousGarage9052
Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word
"Not apologize when they’re wrong."
~ Mlaer7351
"I’ve never heard my mum apologise to me ever."
"She’s said many hurtful things to me in the past that I’ve never let go of because she never came to apologise for any of the things she said."
"If she had simply apologised and admitted that what she said was wrong and hurtful, I think that things between us would be so much better."
~ ellie_wxbster
Control
"Might sound a little contradictory but either not disciplining them or disciplining them way too much."
~ RandomRamblings99
"The disciplining too much hits hard."
"I know so many kids with strict parents that became druggies the second they left for college."
"Nobody taught them to have self agency because their independence never existed until they left their homes."
~ Redacted_G1iTcH
"I never had chores to do around the house. I never had a curfew. I was rarely told no."
"I was spoiled to the point where my parents would be willing to pay for my Ubering everywhere because they were too afraid I would get in an accident if I drove a car. I'm 29 and don't have a license and pay for that almost every day."
"Basically grew up like a princess. My mom came to my doctor's appointments and even sometimes made said appointments for me (cause I couldn't make phone calls) until I finally moved out."
"And by that, I mean moved out of the house, country, continent."
"I've been living on my own for over two years now. I'm still alive. They made fun of me, saying I grew up like a princess and because of it, I wouldn't last a day without my family."
"Yes, I'm still very much codependent and talk with them more than anyone else even now—but I proved to myself that I can take care of myself. I'm a different person, and that's the first thing my sibling said to me when we spent some time together recently."
"I'm a full-blown grown-up now. And I'm glad I jumped into it. It was so hard, but I'm getting better at it. Slowly but surely."
~ Ancient_Reply4583
Gimme Shelter
"Over sheltering them."
"You can't protect your kids 24/7 for their whole lives."
"It leads to naive adults that get taken advantage of."
~ Chosen_of_Nerevar
"I think some parents confuse 'trauma' with 'adversity'."
"Trauma can lead to long lasting emotional, social, mental, and physical issues. Consequently, trauma should be avoided at all costs."
"However, adversity can lead to personal growth, perseverance, and confidence building."
"Parents (and society as a whole) need to be able to distinguish one from the other."
~ triton2toro
Parenting is hard work and no one will get everything right all the time.
All anyone can do is try their best.
Parents With Estranged Adult Children Explain What Went Wrong
Anthony Tran on Unsplash
*The following article contains discussion of suicide/self-harm.
There are a lot of old platitudes about familial bonds, mostly focused on preserving the relationship with relatives—especially immediate family—no matter what.
But public attitudes have shifted in part due to greater awareness of the harm caused by unhealthy relationships.
Now people discuss relationships with terms like gaslighting, toxic, emotional blackmail and going no/low contact.
The once taboo act of cutting family members out of your life has gained greater acceptance.
But what do the family members—especially parents—excised feel?
Reddit user bridge2235 asked:
"People who have adult children that don’t talk to you. Why do you think that is?"
Personal Issues
"I was very deep in resolving my own trauma when my kids were growing up. I was often distant and emotionally unavailable."
"I wasn’t the parent they deserved. It is the greatest sorrow of my life; I did to my kids what my mom did to me."
"I can’t be sorry enough."
~ Interesting-Ant-5163
New Family
"From the other parent's perspective, my adult children (25 and 23) do not communicate with their father at all."
"Long story short, he remarried about a week after our divorce was final and he and his new wife went on to have children of their own. Over time, his visits with the children because more infrequent and stressful due to his wife's distaste for me and my children."
"He has had no contact with the kids in over 3 years and his previous attempt was 4 years before that."
"My youngest says he will never forgive his father for replacing us all with a new family and forgetting us. The oldest says it's just not worth chasing someone who has no interest."
"Personally, I'm sad and angry on their behalf. He divorced me, not them."
"I want to say, the amount of people who say they've experienced this same issue astounds me, and breaks my heart."
"I just do not understand a parent who can walk away from their child(ren). Even when it's been hard and I've had to be both Mom and Dad, I wouldn't trade my kids for anything."
~ geminiloveca
Substance Abuse
"Mom here. My 23-year-old hasn't spoken to me in four years. It was completely my fault."
"I've struggled with addiction (alcohol) and for most of her childhood I was bad. I hope to be able to apologize to her someday."
"But, I completely understand and respect her decision."
~ Prudent_Blueberry_23
"My step daughter is an addict and mentally ill. Her son was placed in our custody by the state three years ago at 13 months old and she has never made the effort to regain custody."
"Her rights were terminated last year and we adopted him last month when the state gave us the choice."
"She has hated us ever since he was placed here and has convinced herself that we stole her child."
"She only contacted my husband if she wanted money, which he won't give her so that makes her hate us more."
~ True_Let_8993
"My daughter went through a traumatic event when she found out her Mom was having an affair with a junkie. Daughter was furious at her Mom for destroying the family."
"Mom flipped out, threatened [to hurt herself] to our daughter’s face, blaming her. At that moment, everything shifted and daughter became the nurturer to her Mom, who regressed into childhood—a complete switching of roles when my daughter really needed a Mom.
"Mom wasn’t safe to be angry at (for fear she’d hurt herself), so I became the target."
"We talk, but it’s so terse and superficial that it’s close to non-communication. I’d like to talk through what happened, even in a therapeutic setting, but daughter says that’s off the table."
~ Utterlybored
"It’s very common for the kids to seek affection more from the abusive parent, who does not give it freely. It’s also common for the non-abusive parent to get all the deflected emotions that the abusive parent has trained the children not to point their way."
~ AbsentGlare
"The safe person always becomes the punching bag. Happens in any kind of relationship."
~ TeutonJon78
Narcissists
"There's a woman at church and every week she asks for prayers during prayer requests. At first I thought it was kinda cute but it's over a year later and she always asks for prayers that her children will speak with her again."
"She claims to have been the best mother and, one-by-one, all three of her adult children and thus her grandchildren stopped speaking with her. But she did everything right—she fed them, she clothed them, she put them through school.
"Which to me sounds like the bare minimum that you're supposed to do as a parent and not 'everything', but OK."
"I gave her the benefit of the doubt but then, every week, another piece of the puzzle would come out."
"She tried calling but her numbers blocked. She tried to find them on social media but she's blocked."
"How strange—she says she was such an excellent mother, why would they block her?"
"She tried reaching out again and received a handwritten letter on why she should never contact them again, but we never heard the contents of the letter."
"We were just supposed to pity her and have sympathy and assume that these entire separate groups of people were evil and were doing her emotional harm."
"I got to know her and she is an abusive narcissist and nothing short of pure evil. All the red flags you'd expect are there. But, every week it's pray to Jesus for me everybody, my evil ungrateful children, blah, blah, blah."
"I'd like to hope she is just clueless but I understand she is sick and probably doesn't know how horrible she really is. I feel very, very bad for her kids but very happy they were strong enough to break away from that hot mess."
"It almost brings me physical pain now when she asks for prayers that her kids will talk to her again, because I know all she wants to do is resume hurting them."
~ OregonHighSpores
"Probably my mom. Tell Susan I said 'Hi'."
"Or don’t actually. You should probably go no contact also before she wrecks your life, too. "
~ caseofthef'karounds
"I’m lucky. Both my adult children call me multiple times a week. But my ex (their father) complains that our daughter rarely calls him."
"I’ve told him many, many times that if he wanted her to call more often he needs to listen to her."
"He’s a pretty narcissistic dude who only wants to talk and if he takes a breath and you try to jump into the conversation, he either gets louder to drown you out or he goes dead silent, clearly in his 'waiting until you shut up so I can talk' mode."
"He never asks questions or expresses any interest in their lives."
"My son puts up with it because he can direct some of the conversation by bringing up sports or interesting historical stuff or books or whatever and then they can have somewhat of a discourse (although listening to the inevitable droning lecture is always included)."
"My daughter has little patience for that so she rarely calls him. Even after I told him what he should try, he ignores me, which is what he did for nearly the entirety of our marriage."
"He still periodically bemoans the fact that she doesn’t call."
~ Big-Summer-
"My mother told me, three weeks after I lost my father/best friend at fourteen, that he told her on his deathbed that 'Adopting me was his greatest mistake'."
"It stuck with me my whole life. I'm 38, and now know it wasn't true. But that narcissistic b*tch can rot in Hell."
~ Willing-Survey7448
"I think my Uncle would say it's because his sons were brainwashed by their wives."
"The truth is, I think my cousins didn't see that my Uncle's (diagnosed) narcissism wasn't normal, because they were raised by him."
"Their wives, as outsiders, pointed this out to them for the first time and they made their decision from there."
~ jademenagerie
Unavailable
"[I'm the] parent. It’s because I f'ked up and neglected the relationship."
"I wasn’t the father she deserved. It’s that simple."
"I came from an abusive, chaotic household. My father never once said he loved me. I said I would be different. Although I love her, my actions did not reflect it.
"Throughout her childhood, I can remember so many times that I had the chance to demonstrate my feelings. I had the chance to make moments into impactful teaching moments and core memories for her."
"Looking back, it’s not that I missed those chances. I NEVER TOOK THE SHOT. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. I have told myself that I have failed at many things in life, but that I am not a failure."
"I can’t lie to myself here. As a father, I failed. It hurts, but I know it’s nothing compared to the hurt and damage I’ve caused to her. I put her on what could be a long road, an uphill battle to learn to love herself."
"I hope she’s stronger than I was and never feels that she wasn’t good enough for me to love her. I wasn’t good enough of a man to be her father. I didn’t deserve her."
"She really was a good kid despite the pain I know she lived with. I can’t tell her I’m sorry. She’s an adult now and has gone no contact."
"I lost her. This is the one true failure I will have to live with. And die with."
~ UltraBunnyBoostST
"I'm going to pretend my Dad wrote this and accept that him ignoring me, my daughter, my husband, and our life we've made, is really that simple."
"He neglected the relationship. He's not the father I deserve."
~ weberster
"You don't need to hear him say it to know it's true. If your dad wasn't there for you and wasn't the father you deserve, that's on him."
"It hurts you too, but it's not your fault and had nothing to do with you."
~ fuqqkevindurant
Untreated Disorders
"My children are low contact. I feel it's fair. Their mother has Bi-Polar Disorder."
"She was violent and abusive. She has gotten help since then but she still hurt them in the past."
"I did not protect them. Them not being around me is justified. They should be angry."
"We f'ked up. They didn't do anything wrong and they need to heal as they see fit."
"Kids not being around their parents have valid reasons. Most people just can't accept it."
~ AcademicPin8777
"I had PTSD and didn't deal with it. In short I was a sh*tty dad."
~ legl0ckholmes
"Not sure how many people understand PTSD, even those of us that have it. You look normal, no one can really tell you are emotionally/mentally screwed up."
"It's very unpredictable and unpredictable can be rough on kids. I yelled too much and have worked hard to stop."
"Hope you aren't in a blame cycle and have forgiveness for yourself. It's hard."
~ Desslock73
"I am a parent of a child—daughter—who does still talk to me but rarely and I fully accept that it is my fault."
"I was an immature parent and made some bad decisions in addition to being inconsistent with my parenting due to immaturity."
"I am also on the spectrum but that’s something I didn’t find out until a few years ago when my son was diagnosed."
"I know I wasn’t great and I understand my daughter and I try to give her space."
~ RTrinitoneBlast
Religion
"A cousin’s parents fired him from their very successful family business because he refused to take his wife and children to their church and worship the way they did. In retaliation he and his wife refused to allow his parents to see the grandchildren."
"They sued. They lost. They never were able to see their grandchildren and eventually died."
"He ended up with the business anyway by default, not by the will. They lost decades of grandchildren just by being stubborn."
"Nobody in the family had anything to do with them the last 35 years of their lives and they were miserable."
"Parents, if you f'k over your children don't expect to every have your grandchildren."
~ HixsonHank
"Child here and I just want to say, huge props to the parents taking accountability."
"I wonder if mine will ever do the same."
~ SKmaric
Redditor Fivepurplehoodies provided sound advice for parents.
"Just love and respect your kids. Do your best."
"Admit that you sometimes miss the mark, even if you had the best intentions."
"Don’t invalidate your kids’ experiences."
"That’s it. That’s all."
That's good advice for all family relationships.
****
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 by phone or text or via chat on their website: https://988lifeline.org/
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
There is not one, correct way to parent.
After all, different children have different needs, and as a result some parents might need to adopt different methods so that their children can learn a lesson.
That being said, if there isn't one right way, there is definitely one wrong way, particularly regarding what some parents might say to their children.
Even though it might not seem like it at the time, all children take in and hear everything their parents tell them.
Some things parents say to their children might have lasting consequences, haunting them for the rest of their lives.
Redditor under20letters was curious to hear people considered the absolute worst thing parents could say to their children, leading them to ask:
Most Likely The Other Way Round
"I literally heard a mother say this to her child in the ER the other day."
"The kid was just talking to his mother about the usual stupid kid sh*t and she shouted 'YOURE RUINING MY LIFE! YOU OPENING YOUR MOUTH RIGHT NOW IS RUINING MY LIFE'."
"He put his head down and said sorry."
"My mom had her bad days but she never said sh*t like that to me."- PearlJamDudeVoice
Makes You Wonder Why They Did In The First Place
"If I could do my life over I'd never have had children."- FrogGob
Hurtful At Any Age
"'I feel like I have to love you because you're my child, but I don't like you at all'."
"My mom said this to me when I was 10 years old."- ATrulyTerriblePerson
So, So Wrong
"Saying that something is wrong with your brain."- Fit-Caterpillar-9729
It's What They Don't Say...
"Nothing, blaming them, not saying I’m proud of your or I love you."- FM_Apollyon
"Absolutely nothing."
"If you don't communicate, ask about their day, if you genuinely do not care about who they are as a person, it's just as damaging as saying the most hurtful things."
"So, if you really want to hurt someone, don't acknowledge them as a human being."- EeerrEeer
"Giving them the silent treatment over some offense (real or imagined)."- kenaisourdough
So Much For It Being The Thought That Counts
"Mine said to me when I was six years old: thanks for the [in school handmade diy] Christmas gift."
"'But you know we never use xyz, so this is useless'."
"'Why would you make that?'“
"Because I didn’t have a choice, and the teacher told us to?!"
"Can’t remember what it was, but this stuck with me."
"Been anxious about gifting them anything ever since."- SnicketyLemon875
As If They Know What That Is
"'Why can't you be normal?'"- Tail_Nom
Words Of Encouragement Are Not So Difficult
“'You just ruin everything'."
"'I hope you never find happiness'."
"'Hope your in-laws make you suffer'."
"'Hope your husband cheats on you'.”- Kindly-Try-7223
Where To Even Begin
"Take your pick, I heard all of these at various points during my childhood:"
"'I put my life on hold for (insert child's age) years for you/so you could exist'."
"From mom when she wanted something from me and I didn't immediately drop everything and come running."
"You don't live in a democracy, you live in a dictatorship, so you don't get a vote'."
"From mom at a young enough age that school hadn't gone over democracies and dicatorships yet, i was probably just trying to share an idea for plans or something."
"'You'd better quit backtalking me/being disrespectful'."
"When in the right during a disagreement with either."
"'Alright, put em up then' and 'you wanna take this outside?'"
"From dad who thinks challenging his 12-13 year old son to a fistfight is the way to deal with anger."
"I'm sure there's more that i haven't unrepressed yet."- kbyyru
And That Falls On Them...
"My parents had this saying: 'children are like pancakes the first one always fails'.”
"I’m the oldest of 2."
"At first I thought they meant it as a joke but after hearing that almost weekly for the past 18 years, I think they actually mean it."- thoyo3
And They're Probably Exhausted Of Not Being Loved.
"I'm so tired of pretending to love you."
"Not mine, read it in a similar post a while back but it stuck with me."
"I can't imagine the trust issues a kid would have hearing that said to them."- nenev
Blaming Them For Everything
"My mum said so much filth to me as a kid, as well as literally making me live in it."
"For better or for worse, til about age 11, I remember hardly anything, my brain has just completely deleted it all."
"But I'll always remember when she told me that she'll die soon from me and the stress I bring her."
"When she said this to me, I was already living my dad full time and only saw her one day a week after school and went home to my dad again in the evening."
"I wasn't even a bad kid, I was so quiet and could entertain myself."
"Little me didn't deserve to hear that."- THEgingerONEhasRISEN
Make no mistake, sometimes children need discipline and need to be spoken to sternly.
But scolding only works if it comes from a place of love.
As long as there's love, children will thrive, and any child who doesn't get the love they deserve is a deprived child.