We are in the throes of a cultural awakening. Everyone is becoming keenly aware of the trials and tribulations of our fellow humans. One aspect of life, in particular, that has seen some significant increase in discussion is the plight of the woman. There are just some verifiable truths about how life can be a more arduous journey for the ladies.Redditor u/WinstonChurchillin wondered what men were willing to admit about life burdens for women by asking... Men of Reddit: What can you acknowledge is harder for women?
The laundry list is long. I for one truly believe no man could ever handle birth. If men had to give birth, there would be none. And that is just the tip of the iceberg. Observe...
Around the World...flying klm royal dutch airlines GIF by KLMGiphy
Traveling alone. Takes some guts to travel alone as a girl especially in not so developed countries. Women need to be careful and look out for things that we men almost never take even in consideration.
Hours of Pain
The risk of dying when having children. Yes I know men can't have children but hear me out. I work in a maternity theatre and see hundreds of births every year. It amazes me the amount of crap and pain and risk that women have to go through to have kids. Seriously, my respect for women has no bounds. I see what they go through during childbirth and I think I could never do that. By the time they get to the emergency theatre they've usually already been struggling to progress for various reasons for HOURS!!.
They arrive tired, scared, upset, worried, bleeding, in extreme pain and feeling a million emotions in between. Add into that that things can take a turn for the worse very quickly and it is quite scary for the theatre staff as well. Ladies of Reddit, just know, if you come into the theatre when I'm on duty, I got your back. I don't think us men appreciate this quite as much as we should do.
Creepy people following you. My girlfriend walked home from work sometimes. It wasn't far and it was in broad daylight. This guy drove by and asked to give her a ride. She declined said she was almost home. When she got home she told me about it and how he kept driving up and down the street looking at her afterwards.
He followed her into the apartment complex and parked his car to watch her go into the apartment. I was obviously upset. I went out with her so she could point him out but he had left. It was weird. I told her to call me right away if she sees him anywhere near here.
People Share The 'Dirty Secrets' That Their Bosses Don't Want Customers To Know
A Deep Cut
My mother told me how my birth went down.
She hadn't dilated enough for me to actually get out all the way, so the doctors suggested breaking my shoulder to allow me through.
Upon hearing that my mother sneered at the doctor who suggested this and said:
"You don't touch my son, cut me open down there if need be but you don't touch my son"
And they sliced her open down there, and you know what the most messed up thing was? She told me she couldn't even feel them cutting her because she was already in so much pain. And this was her 4th time giving birth.
That's when I realized that mothers are just inherently badass in that regard.
After EffectsShannyn Sossamon Cringe GIFGiphy
UTIs. My wife will occasionally get a UTI after sex and has to suffer the discomfort and the irritation of trying to get a GP appointment (UK) whilst convincing the witch of a GP receptionist that you want an appointment today.
All the simple things men take for granted, like just being able to walk down a street. Take note gentlemen reading. If you're not agreeing here then maybe talk to the ladies in your life and read this thread together.
Later in Life
My grandma always jokes that it's 'only' men who go through the stereotypical Mid-life Crisis of randomly changing up their lives, buying cool things, acting differently (etc), because all of the women are too busy over-heating, being hormonal, and having to deal with annoying symptoms at that age to have the time or inclination to have a Crisis.
Large boobs seem like a curse to me (I wouldn't want to own them if I were a girl but they sure look cool). They can cause back problems and just look unwieldy and the only upside of them making you more attractive to many people is also a major downside when it comes to creeps/unwanted attention.
Dealing with unwanted pregnancy.
My niece was 29 when she found out she was pregnant. She had been dating her boyfriend for over a year, but they weren't married. They're in a small town in Missouri. She did the good Christian thing and kept the baby. As soon as her boss found out she was pregnant out of wedlock, he fired her.
Of course, her boyfriend didn't get fired for getting a woman pregnant out of wedlock. And when I told my birthed that what her boss did was illegal, he said "Yeah well, we live in Missouri so good luck with that."
Imagine you have the stomach flu. One of those bad ones with crippling stomach cramps and liquid ass. You're exhausted, you hurt, you generally don't feel good, and your nether regions feel disgustingly in need of a shower.
Now imagine this happens every month. You can't just take 3-7 days off every month at the last second. You have to go to work, pick up the kids, get dinner, etc. The world at large doesn't get that you're miserable, so you just get up and keep going.
Hormones can play a part, but tell me if you'd be a bit freaking cranky having to function on all of the above.
Getting Prettyfrozen game on GIF by Walt Disney StudiosGiphy
Not for all women, but many take a lot of time to get ready because they feel it's required. Most men brush hair out of the shower and that's it.
Pressure to be a perfect parent. My partner would get approached by strangers at grocery stores and parking lots and criticized for random stuff she was "letting" our then-2 y.o. get away with it. When I was public with our child, it was pretty much "Oh look at the good dad!" for just being.
The wicked stepmom trope pretty much reinforces how the expectations are set at a huge bar for women, while deadbeat dads make it a shrugging "oh well, that sucks but what are you gonna do" bar for men.
When I began in the military everyone including all the girls were in far better physical condition than I was.
2 Months in I was bringing in a better performance than all but one girl. The difference in muscle growth, etc. is simply at a level where women are never able to keep up with men who put even half the effort in of them.
Gotta Gopee dancing GIFGiphy
Public restrooms always seem have more of a line than men's rooms. Plus, y'all get to sit down on every nasty public toilet you have to use. That sucks.
This one time at a punk show, I asked where the restroom was. The gentleman pointed to the alleyway outside the venue. I thought "Gross, but punk show. Can't exactly complain."
So, I release the kraken. When this punk girl strolls up next to me, gives me a "sup" nod, whips out a plastic penis contraption, and puts my measly little stream to shame.
I learned two things: Women drew the short straw on restrooms. And punk girls are a different breed.
WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW?
Birth control. My girlfriend is on an implant and it makes her period Hella irregular and so she can bleed intermittently with no warning so she'll just go to the toilet one day and be bleeding. No prediction of when it will happen. Just "hey you're bleeding now. How long for? WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW?".
JUST so we don't have kids we're not ready for. I'm happy to wear a condom but it's not as safe as using something like the implant or a IUD in terms of family planning. She had to get that crap inserted into her arm with general anaesthetic like a baddie. And one type of birth control doesn't work for everyone. I've heard my friends talking about how they have to take the pill at the same time every day.
I can't even remember to have breakfast most days. I've heard you can get injections that last 3 months and can mess with your mood even on anti depressants. And some women I know will be on birth control because their boyfriend wants it raw. The lengths they go through is ridiculous.
You Hear Me?
Specifically, I'm a guy that got catcalled A LOT in high school and college. I ran distance in tiny short shorts and that's it, and got everything from whistles to honks, girls blowing kisses to guys yelling out of their car windows, to gay guys slapping my butt or complimenting me.
I took it in stride, none if it ever bothered me, and that kind of colored my opinion of catcalling - not that I approved of it, but that it wasn't that big a deal.
Then I had a girlfriend in college, and she got catcalled while I was walking her home at night. It was a DISTINCTLY different experience. Turns out I never once felt threatened by my catcallers, but hers were definitely scary and threatening.
It was a completely different experience, and really crappy and frightening.
My wife actually told me today, that breastfeeding has been more painful than the childbirth of our daughter.
I thought it was interesting because I have never heard that before.
Was news to me after I'd already became pregnant.
Also, some women are constantly nauseous their entire pregnancies. HG being the extreme worst of it. I was one of the lucky few. Was like a nine month stomach flu with a number of good days I could count on my hand.
This is funny but my husband injured his back pretty bad a couple of weeks before I was due. It was pretty bad and because of covid he couldn't get a physio appointment quickly.
Labor is fine to start with. I need occasional assistance from him, but it's going smoothly.
Then my waters break. Hooooly crap, the labor went pretty bad that moment on. I wanted to stay vertical to guide the baby out, but could only do that if my husband crouched on the floor with me and rubbed my back. He did that for three hours (the contractions were every minute), but he couldn't keep it going. The nurses told him to please go rest up.
Get it Guys?Full House Ok GIFGiphy
I'm a guy and I was working at an ice cream and candy shop, and this older man comes in and orders some popcorn.
As I'm scooping it into the container he looks at me and says "Oh yeah, just pack it in. I like it when they pack it in real tight." In an obviously sexual way. It made me uncomfortable and I bring it up talking to my coworkers and one of the girls who was much younger says "Yeah welcome to pretty much every day of my life."
A Hairy Situation
Damn so many good ones have been said already. A relatively minor thing that I haven't seen yet is hair. Body hair of any kind is often something women are expected to minimize/remove completely. Also, long hair is a b!tch to take care of and manage, as I've come to realize by letting my hair grow past my shoulders during the pandemic.
Edit: Come on people, I know that many guys shave and groom too. My point is a guy can let hair grow out anywhere on their body and not have to realistically worry about being perceived as gross or weird for it. Also, yes guys can have long hair and women can have short hair, but it's common knowledge that there's a very strong tendency for the opposite to be true.
My hat is off to you ladies. Life is a minefield for everyone but it's imperative to acknowledge when you have a less dicey route through the debris of it all, while others struggle is far heavy load to bear.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Not all television and movies are loved by all.
A story and its characters have to appeal to you in order for you to be engaged.
It can take next to nothing for us to lose interest and let the screen go black.
Redditor BarooTangClan wanted to compare notes on all the entertainment we've said "that's enough" to.
"What will make you instantly stop watching a movie or show and why?"
I hate bad acting, writing, storytelling... I hate bad anything.
Stop JumpingFight Scene GIF by Operation FortuneGiphy
"Fight scenes with a million visual cuts. Gives me motion sickness. Contrast the absolutely masterful work in John Wick. long cuts, realistic use of weapons (mostly), 100% skill."
"When the actors whisper the whole movie and you have to crank the volume to hear what's being said - but the soundtrack or some other misc noise starts blaring at a higher volume directly after."
"I basically had to watch Stranger Things up in my attic with the windows and doors closed. I was worried the neighbors would think something was wrong or be annoyed if I watched it downstairs in my single family home. It was ridiculous."
"spice things up"
"Love triangles out of no where in a second or third season to 'spice things up' because studio writers are hacks and their idea of relationship drama is 'potential infidelity' at all times. It's the most tired trope on the go**amn planet and the second I see it rear its head I dip right the hell out."
"The whole concept of a love triangle to begin with an incredibly juvenile. Any healthy functioning adult who found themselves in a love triangle would soon choose to find themselves single."
Save your lips...
"When couples in a movie/show have a fight and one of them instantly goes to a friend and end up kissing her/him after talking for 5 minutes. I cringe so hard i turn it off and never watch it again."
"This pissed me off so much in Manifest. Girl is desperate to get back her ex-fiancé, he finally breaks up with his wife to get back with her and she's like 'nah, it's not fair to your wife, let me do this other dude I just met through a calling and be pissed at you for being jealous.' Michaela was the worst and everyone acted as if she were a saint the entire time."
Talk to MeIn Love Flirt GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"Shows where a single polite conversation could fix everything."
We are going overboard with the witty repartee. Talk normal...
Shut UpScared Home Alone GIF by FreeformGiphy
"Annoying main character, especially if it's a kid."
"Kids who have a quippy, sassy retort to everything, and everyone just kind of crumbles before their wit."
"Shows where kids in high school talk like they are 30 years olds who have done everything, been everywhere, know it all and use a ridiculously flowery and extensive vocabulary in every conversation. Like, have any of these writers ever been to high school? Literally no one talks like that. Even worse is when, in addition to this, all the adults talk normal or are just plain stupid, like so weird parallel universe."
"If the movie is too dark. Not graphic, just literally dark. I lose all sense of intensity in dark scenes and I'm not straining my damn eyes trying to figure out what the hell is going on."
"I've seen about 10 percent of all DC movies recently. I've seen all of the individual films in full, just actually saw 10% of each of them."
"Movies in the late 80s had a lot of dark but you could see the depth because of different shooting techniques. Now you cant see crap because its a CGI fest drowned in black color so you can't see crap because you have no depth in a scene. Compare night scenes in dark alleys in 80's movies and movies now. Utter crap show in the new ones."
Pay Attention Storytellers
"Bad editing would be a big one. A lot of modern horror movies can't help but edit the movies like they're trailers, with added noises to scare the audience because they are afraid the script alone isn't enough to keep people watching."
"I remember this is where the first transformers movie lost me. When the transformers are fighting at the end, it's all a big, jumbled mess of metal and I can barely tell what's going on or who is who."
Dramawill devry soap opera GIF by General HospitalGiphy
"When they go straight to relationship drama right away when it wasn't the selling point of the show."
Do better, Hollywood. It's not that hard.
I fear death.
I wake up in cold sweats dreaming about it.
I think about it in my waking hours.
It's an obsession and clearly, I'm not alone.
But there are more preferred ways to exit.
All we can do is hope to be lucky enough to skip the mercilessly awful.
Please just let me go quick and in my sleep.
RedditorCallMehRiverwanted to hear about all the ways none of us what to leave this life.
"What Do You Think Would Be The Worst Death Imaginable?"
My list of the worst deaths is long. My imagination runs amok.
Trappedseason 6 friends GIFGiphy
"For me? Being trapped in a small tube or cave (like the ones you have to wiggle through) and getting stuck to where you can’t move your arms. And all you can do is wait to die. I’m getting chills just thinking about it."
"The more I hear about cavers that get stuck, the more I think that's a crap way to go."
"There’s a great YouTube channel called Ask a Mortician and this was her #1 worse way to die. I can’t remember the exact details or their names, but two well-known divers went into an underwater cave."
"One of them became entangled and died. Years later, his friend dives back down there to try and retrieve his body, the body itself is rotten and his head comes off and the other guy also becomes tangled and dies. Really sad."
A Long Process
"Believed to be in a coma but coherent through the whole 20 year process until they pull the plug."
"Oh man this just reminded me of a story I read on here about a guy who lost the ability to move and speak but was completely conscious. Had to just lay there and be awake but trapped in a useless body. His family thought he was brain dead or something and he couldn’t communicate to them that he was 'all there.' Crazy"
Slow & Steady
"Being slowly impaled by a growing bamboo. It was a form of torture probably used by the japanese during WW2 against Allied prisoners."
"The scariest part is that once you have symptoms, you 100% will die. A 100% mortality rate has to be a psychological torture in itself."
"Not only that, you feel irrational fear. Your brain is literally being eaten apart by the virus and it fu*ks up everything on it. You can't drink water because it hurts you. You feel dizzy, present a fever, excessively salivate, everything hurts and it only gets worse. I'd rather take a bullet and die when the symptoms are still tolerable."
Why can't we all just go engulfed in calm and quiet?
"Some pulpy sci-fi book I read a while back had one of the best deaths of this real piece of crap bad guy. Left to die in a drowning sea lab under the Antarctic ice, he freezes himself in a state of the art suspended animation pod with some kind cold fusion power source that would keep it running for millions of years."
"But he forgot to inject himself with the drug that would put him to sleep. So basically he is in suspended animation at the bottom of the Antarctic ocean while his mind is perfectly awake and conscious in a near unbreakable machine that won't run out of power for millions of years and nobody knows about it."
"As an RN I have always thought that the worst way to die (natural process) is ALS. Lou Gehrig's Disease."
"My mom and grandmother have Huntington's disease, which is essentially ALS, Alzheimer's, and Dementia combined into one really messed up genetic disease. I have a 50% chance of inheriting it and if I hit 40 and there's still no cure I can't promise I'll feel like continuing on with my life because that disease is absolutely freaking miserable."
"The fact your chromosomes can be so destroyed your body basically lost it's genetic code and with it the ability to make any new cells. It's literally a 'dead man walking' and you slowly rot away in agony. Stuff is so unimaginably f**ked up."
"What's also bad about radiation is that it affects your nerves and brain cells last, so you have everything in place to feel all the pain of the rest of your cells being destroyed."
GooNot Listening Season 2 GIF by The Fresh Prince of Bel-AirGiphy
"I want to believe anything that slowly kills you painfully to be the worst. Such as slowly being crushed or something where the pain is beyond compare and yet not enough to throw you into shock or unconsciousness."
"Alternatively, being rapidly crushed into goo would probably be the least painful. I'm talking one of those massive industrial hammers they use for large steel work. Basically smooshed before the nerve signals make it to the brain."
Now I'll never sleep again without nightmares of death.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Most Americans think nothing of their humdrum daily activities or amenities available to them.
However, others with a different perspective might romanticize the things that are otherwise commonplace ideas and concepts for US citizens, like going to a diner or riding the school bus.
One Redditor looked to foreigners to hear of their American desires to respond to the following:
"Non-Americans of Reddit: what is an American thing you have always wanted to try?"
The things depicted in film really captivated foreign audiences.
"To visit a diner like in the movies. In the middle of the night, it’s raining and just a few people there with great music from a jukebox."
Iconic Student Transport
"Ride a yellow school bus even if I'm too old. Growing up I always loved seeing them on TV."
Just Like The Ones We Used To Know
"A white Christmas."
"Living in an Australian state where I've never even seen snow in our winter, let alone experiencing that classic Hallmark movie moment of waking up to a street full of it and sitting around a fireplace while opening gifts/preparing a feast."
"Guess it's not strictly American, but the imagery and trope is something I've only really seen from American Films."
They may be ubiquitous for us, but they sure seem to be novel ideas to foreigners.
Let's Be Frank
"One of the hotdogs from those little street cart things."
"A friend of mine from Indonesia said, 'the food chewer in the sink.'"
"Apple Pie made by white-haired grandma, placed near window, who says 'oh dear...' as I levitate towards it."
"Proper tailgating before a ball game, the kind where there's ribs and stuff."
"Deep fried foods at a state fair. I'm from Scotland and we love to deep fry everything and I wanna know if it's just as good or better."
There are places to see!
Places To See
"America’s greatest invention!"
Backpacking In Nature
"I always wanted to hike The Appalachian Trail if that counts. Or see Yellowstone."
"Being able to start a whole new life 'elsewhere' without having to leave my country and going through an arduous immigration process."
My cousin told me she looks forward to visiting a Trader Joe's someday when she visits America for the first time.
Her bucket list option was hardly surprising. My parents used to bring treats from TJs as a novelty souvenir gift item, and my relatives ate it up. Literally.
Let's face it. The snacks at TJs rocks.
Even store locations in New York City would have ridiculously long lines during busy hours because the West-coast-based grocer was a novelty on the East Coast.
Many people work hard from the moment they are on the clock until their respective shifts are over at the end of a long day.
For many of those in the workforce, the wages barely sustain a comfortable living, especially for those who are raising a family.
Yet, there are jobs that are known to pay a higher salary without requiring extreme physical labor, or the requirement of higher education.
Curious to hear what those jobs might be, Redditor ImAMasterBayter asked:
"People Break Down Which Professions Are Completely Overpaid"
Extensive training requirements are not a thing, apparently, with these professions.
Daily Dairy Duty
"I watch milk powder go into a bag and out on a conveyor and get paid $37 an hour."
Eyeing Dirt In Motion
"Mine? I get paid $20.50 a hr to watch dirt go by on a belt all day."
The Handy Man Is Happy To Help
"I am a handy man that charges $50/hr with a 3hr minimum, a couple months ago I got a call for service that consisted of changing 9 smoke detector batteries, 2 light bulbs, and rehanging a picture. I felt bad taking the money but the guy couldn’t have been happier to have that stuff finally done. He asked for my card and is now a very good client."
Words From An Appraiser
"I make about 40 an hour after tax in the US as a real estate appraiser. You just need a college degree and a year of training and there is a huge shortage of appraisers right now."
"Edit because this post blew up: I only perceive this job as being overpaid because I used spent most of my 20's making pizza for minimum wage and imposter syndrome is a thing. Also, OP said he was looking for a possible career, and I felt like my job post was better than a troll post."
"Appraisers are not real estate agents or brokers. I do not buy or sell property."
"I do not, 'look at zillow and copy the number' and I don't just, 'make the number' in valuation. While I agree there are some appraisers who may lie or exaggerate, the same could be said of nearly any job. However, if I were to intentionally try hit some goal and got caught fudging the numbers, I'm looking at permanently losing my license and possible jail time depending on the severity. It's actually pretty common for me to, 'tank a deal' if someone is paying too much. This isn't the wild west of valuation anymore; FIRREA is a thing now. Appraisal reports aren't just 3 pages of photos with a cover page anymore; my typical appraisal is 30-50 pages with long boring typed pages of market data that I type and research myself."
"Let's talk about the appraisal gap. In most of the US, we are experiencing a, 'sellers market' meaning houses are selling for higher than what they normally sell for. A lot of people at this thread are blaming appraisers for driving housing prices up. Let me be perfectly clear about this: appraiser's valuations are based off of past data. That is it; we look at closed sales from the past. Realtors and brokers speculate on future markets, because they are motivated by profit. If anyone is driving this current market trend, it is the people buying properties over listing price, local government/laws willingness to allow foreign investors, the people who are raising rents, and the people who are making big risky developments. The appraisers have little to nothing to do with market perception of value; in my area at least many market participants are paying over 30% of listing price. Trust me when I say these people are not satisfied when my appraised value comes in less than that."
"The hardest part of the job is definitely the occasional angry phone call. Let's look at an example. Say someone lists their house at 100k, and they accept an offer for 150k, or 50% over listing. Well the appraisal is based off of past closed sales. The bank will only finance up to the appraised value. So if the appraisal comes in at 110k, meaning the subject in relation to comparable sales from the past year in the subject neighborhood equate to roughly 110k, they will either need to renegotiate the price, or be willing to put up 40k of their own money."
"In a sellers market, it's often better to accept a deal with better financing than a higher price. Let's say in this situation instead of taking the 150k offer with a mortgage, you take a smaller offer for 140k that is all cash, no financing. Well if there is no financing involved, meaning no bank, than no appraisal is needed."
Landing work in software seems to be like hitting the jackpot of success.
"I’m in software sales, software sales. Coworker got 100k commission on a deal."
"There are an incredible amount of 'analysts' who just 'own' automated excel sheets they received from developer teams."
"Low to mid six figures is common in HCOL areas."
The Successful Client
"I do the tax returns for a guy who paid 20k for demographic research software and made something like 40M over the last 3 years. His costs are almost nothing and admitted he does like 5 hours of work a week on it."
"I got more likes and comments than I thought I would, and wanted to add some more detail. The guy himself is super nice and easy to work with. It's hard not to feel jealous even though I make good money myself. His business and personal returns are super simple so we don't even charge him that much for them."
"The software is something proprietary he paid a third party for, and I don't know the name of that developer. The data output is sold to political campaigns and he's compensated more if the campaign wins. He did have some clients on both sides but now exclusively works on one side of the aisle."
Salaries in the world of academics got a closer inspection.
"University administrators and board members."
A Stark Contrast
"I'm a professor. I love it. But the 'president's office' contains a staff of 5 people with a total payroll of just under $500k/year. Meanwhile, all the PhDs, MFAs, and DMAs who teach all the classes, advise all the students, and serve on all the committees bring home a whopping $50k-$65k/year, dependent on rank, tenure, etc. It's real fun...
"The president of my institution makes a approximately $500k/year and is provided a house on campus alongside reserved parking if he so chooses to use it. He also gets a country club membership. Meanwhile I have to pay $200 to park at the school where I TA and do research, and I get paid maybe 1/20th of what he does. I genuinely do not understand why the f'k the dude who makes six figures doesn't pay for parking, but I do."
"Edit: that should be half a million."
Some of the cushiest jobs that require less time actively toiling away seem to be paying significantly more than the average livable wage offered in the US.
Perhaps the biggest indicator of what that might be was summed up best by Redditor iadasr, who said:
"Whatever you guys are all doing that lets you browse Reddit all day..."