You see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's glow calls, beckons, for you to come towards it. It'll be easy, you might think, to simply walk into it. But suddenly, your metal-loving neighbor yanks you up, gives you the Heimlich, and forces you to spit out the candy lodged in your throat.
Near-death experiences are unique for everyone unfortunate enough to experience them, but thankfully, that's what we have the internet for.
Reddit user, u/th0nx, wanted to know what it was like when they asked:
When was your "Oh sh-t I'm going to die" moment but you didn't actually die?
Not. The. Bees.
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I'm alergic to bees.
One time I got stung while sitting at a red light. It was a rental and I forgot my bag. No epipen. I turned into a car dealership and yelled to them to call 911. Within 4 minutes (which felt like an eternity) my throat completely closed. Last thing I remember is the guy who was with me yelling that I was blue. I don't know how long I was out, but as soon as the EMTs pushed the epinephrine I sprung back to life. Thank goodness they got there so quickly.
The next day I brought the dealership and the EMTs baskets with cookies.
Seeing The Point Of Impact
It happened when I was a teenager. Two of my cousins, my mother, and I were on the way to San Francisco. I was sitting in the backseat playing on my Nintendo DS. As my cousin was making a left turn (light was green), from my peripheral vision I could see a SUV speeding towards our vehicle. I'm not sure if SUV was running a red light, the driver was distracted, or if just hitting another car for some reason was the driver's intent.
It really felt like time slowed down in the few seconds prior to the accident. I remember thinking I would feel the biggest impact and would probably die because of it since it was coming directly towards my side of the vehicle.
I braced myself, said a quick prayer, thought of my father and grandmother and everyone else we would leave behind. I remember glancing up at the point of impact and watching my DS fall from my hands. The SUV sped away.
Thankfully none of us were injured, just very shocked. Hearing my mom wailing out my name thinking I was hurt or dead right after we got hit was the worst.
Bad Puppy
Mauled by a dog.
I have no memory of most of the bites, but at one point the dog lunged & latched on to my abdomen, a bit up & to the left of my belly button. It was so terrifying & excruciatingly painful I was convinced that the dog was going to rip my guts out. When it was over & I was being escorted to the ambulance I kept my hand pressed over the bite on my gut because I thought I must be bleeding out. The funny thing was that bite was actually nbd & pretty shallow, it was the bites I didn't feel that were severe & caused lasting damage.
Never Trust A Lake
I had a stupid tradition where I'd swim to an island by a camp site I go to every year, it's about a 40 minute swim. I'm a good swimmer and never really bothered taking a life jacket or floating device. One year, I got a massive leg cramp in my left leg when I was 15 minutes from shore. I thought I was done but luckily it went away.
When Death Is Better Than The Alternative
I had the flu pretty bad. It got to the point that I couldn't keep anything down and I could barely walk into the urgent care. It kept up nearly a week, I felt like I was drunk the whole time. I'd wake up and think "if I died, that'd be fine." I didn't want to, but I thought if I did, it would be preferable.
Dangerous Undercurrents
When I was little my family went to Mexico for a holiday vacation. I was playing in the ocean when I felt myself being pulled out to sea. My parents were distracted, but I remember looking up at my sister screaming just as my head went under the water. I'm not sure how long i was underwater, but two guys came out of nowhere, dragged me out of the water, and as quickly as they appeared they were gone.
My parents looked all over the beach and never found them.
See? This Is Why We Have Life Alert.
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Heart attack.
Alone.
Out of town on business.
Hotel booked for a week.
Do Not Disturb on the door.
Passed out from pain and exhaustion.
As I blacked out, I thought 'this is it.'
I wished I could tell my wife, I love her.
Woke up the next day...
Was truly surprised I was alive.
Roughly Uber'ed to hospital, ASAP.
Out of work on leave for 3 months.
Completely changed lifestyle and food.
Doing better, right arm, 50% numb.
Just glad to be here.
🙂👌🏻
A Slippery Slide Of Doom
Okay so, about 2 years ago I was on my way to a friends birthday party, and keep in mind it was the middle of winter in Michigan. On the way there my mom hit some black ice, sliding off the road and the car hit some dirt, making it standing standing on both right tires.
Almost flipped and while it was I said "oh sh-t" but then the car flipped back onto all four. I still joke about it with my mom every winter. Good times.
Irresponsible Choices
After a party one night I made the 45 minute drive back to my house at around 4 or 5 in the morning, may have been less than sober, and when I got home I realized that I had driven with my knees the whole time and was sitting with my arms crossed.
I thought "wow, I should've died"
By The Skin Of Your Neck
This happened when I was about 18/19. Coworker shot a power washer at my neck from point blank range. In that split instant, I thought "I'm dead."
It had only recently been turned off (we were stripping paint from a large barn/shed) and although it hurt on impact, when I reached up to my neck, there was no blood. The relief I felt didn't counteract the feeling of nearly dying. I took off from work that day and cried on the lawn for like an hour, just trying to calm down.
There's A Pun In That Name...
According to my mom, when I was 2 years old I got a candy stuck in my throat. Thankfully my mom was a doctor so she poked her finger inside my throat and fished it out.
I now rarely eat candy other than life savers.
A Water Park...OF DOOM
Back in the day, there was what I considered to be the best water park in the US - Six Flags Atlantis in Hollywood, FL. They had once of the best wave pools in the country. I was 6 at the time - my parents recently divorced. I was with my father in the wave pool. It was so crowded that I lost him and I didn't think he could see me. I barely knew how to swim. On top of that, even at the age of 6, I thought I was pretty smart. I thought my father was just taking me to the water park because that's what father's do - not out of love (turns out I was right and this was the case as 2 years later he completely gave up his own visitation rights).
So here I am, drowning in the wave pool and thinking the only person who's looking for me is a dude that doesn't even really want to be with me (but needs to because it's court mandated). So, my thought process was: what incentive does he have to go bat shit crazy and look for me instead of just casually looking for me? I was under water for a good 30 seconds and couldn't hold on any longer. JUST as I needed a breathe, my father drags me to the surface and saves me. I was shocked. I couldn't believe it. On the drive home, it hit me: if I would have died, my mother would have murdered my father...so his incentive to save me was pretty fucking big.
Car. Surfing.
When I was 16 I was the dumbest kid you've ever met. I was trying to "surf" my car while my friend drove it down a back road, and after a few minutes I tried to crawl back in. I was drinking, and I couldn't quite get in the small windows, so my dumbass put my foot down trying to jump into it and it pulled me down.
Had some pretty serious road rash and cracked my head open. Probably would have died if my friend wasnt terrified that I was doing it and slowed down when I tried to climb in.
Stairway To Death
I was being stupid, and I fell down a flight of stairs, hit my head on the hard wall, and if I wasn't lucky, a ladder would've fallen on me. Lucky me though, I walked out with a sprained elbow, could have been worse, but when I was falling, it felt like my life was flashing right before my eyes.
You've Reached Your Final Destination
I was driving home from my girlfriends place in the city. I was driving home on the highway and out of no way a large pvc pipe comes rolling out in front of my car and I'm doing 70mph. It rolled to the point it seemed it was gonna strike my two left tires and somehow I turned just enough to avoid it. Needless to say a heart attack almost occurred.
Slowly Fading
Stepped on a stingray at the beach and the stinger went almost all the way through my foot like stepping on a nail. I got out and laid down near my family (last day of family vacation) and got my foot wrapped tight in a towel. It only took a few minutes for the poison to set in and my whole leg felt like it was on fire. Everything in my body started going numb, I had a hard time breathing, my fingers and toes curled up and my lips were tightening up. I told my wife I loved her and thought that might be it.
One of my brothers was bawling like crazy thinking I was done for. Somehow I pulled out of it and was able to get to ER and get treated. Hot hot water is the only thing that neutralizes stingray venom/poison. Worst pain I ever felt in my life but so glad I pulled through. Only time I've ever been convinced I wasn't going to make it. And it was a couple months after Steve Irwin's death.
LPT: do the stingray shuffle whenever you are in the water at the beach. Shuffle your feet so you are never taking a big up/down step with your foot. This scares away the stingrays and they don't sting you this way.
When You Want Something To Happen, But It Doesn't
This is gross, but about a year ago I woke up in the middle of the night with stomach pain. This isn't unusual since I have colitis, so I got up, grabbed a Calvin and Hobbes anthology, and prepared to spend some time in the bathroom. Normally the pain comes and goes and I can handle it. Unfortunately, this particular night I was horrifically backed up from nausea medication and couldn't go. I'd never had this happen before and suddenly the pain went from a manageable if unpleasant 5 to 'oh sh-t I might actually be calling 911.'
Unable to force anything out that way, I started vomiting uncontrollably. It honestly felt like my guts were being crushed by something. The only pain I can compare it to is like a Charley horse but in your entire colon. I've got a high pain tolerance but at one point the pain kept getting worse and worse until I was pouring sweat and I had a real moment where I thought my guts might rupture or something.
I panicked and things got real weird for a few minutes. My vision started going and I got really shocky. Dry mouth, more vomiting. I almost passed out in the tub when the spasms got worse because I couldn't keep myself upright. I couldn't push to get my guts moving because even the slightest amount of force was enough to make me shriek in pain. Eventually, with a concentrated effort, I was able to get things moving and I unleashed hell on our toilet. It sounds ridiculous, but I have NEVER been in that much pain. I was absolutely terrified, and that is the closest I have ever come to being like "man, I might die here."
What's the closest you've come to dying? Share it with us!
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- NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCES best of 2018 [FailForceOne] - YouTube ›
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.