Kids' Best 'Weird Flex, But OK' Moments According To Parents
Parents love to brag about their kids, and who could blame them?
If their pride and joy wins a school art contest or places first at a sporting event, any accolade warrants boasting rights.
But what if kids are so extremely proud of their own accomplishments, big or small, and want to go around and exaggerate their victories, who are we to hold them back?
Curious to hear from parents who witnessed questionable moments exhibited by their very confident children, Redditor donut_pickle asked:
"Parents of Reddit, what is the best 'weird flex but ok' moment you've seen from your child?"
Where kids and potty are concerned, it's a winning combo that makes for lively conversations.
"When my kids was potty training, he was in a phase where he loved temporary tattoos. We used tattoos as a reward for a successful potty trip. He got so he was covered on both arms, back and chest. We didn't think much of it, living in Seattle, until one summer day we took him to the wading pool. For one of the first times in public, we took his shirt off, and he strode out into the pool with his toddler abs, and Thomas the tank train shorts, looking like he had just finished a hard set of reps at the free weights in the prison yard."
Potty Like Daddy
"When my son was about two and a half, we thought it would be a good idea to start potty training him. We sat him down, talked to him explaining to him when he pees/poops in the potty he can a reward. He was less than thrilled. It was pretty clear he was not interested."
"We start the process of putting him on the potty, every morning, at regular intervals, etc. After 2 days, he hasn't done anything on the potty, with the added bonus of not having ANY bowel movements, at all (and this kid was REGULAR). After 4 days we begin to panic, prune juice, oatmeal, apple juice, anything to get him to poop."
"At day 5, we are at the Dr.s, who tells us to use suppositories. You guys we gave him suppositories for 3 nights, still nothing! Day 10 rolls around and we're thinking it's time for the hospital,he's got a blockage, he's sick, something is seriously wrong here! Take him to the Dr, one last time before the hospital."
"This time we see a different Dr, who looks at us and asks if we are potty training him, we shake our heads yes, wondering why it matters, since he hasn't even pooped for 10 DAYS! He barely needs a diaper, let alone a potty. He kind of smiles and says, 'well, stop.'"
"He told us that he thought that the potty training was causing him to hold his bowel movements. And that when he was ready to be potty trained, he would let us know. Sceptical, but willing to give it a shot, instead of the hospital we went back home. We made a big show of putting the potty chair up, and told him that if he pooped, he could have any toy in Target (we were desperate!) and no more potty training....... ---20 minutes later he took the biggest sh*t of his little life, and we took our weary, but, relieved a**es to Target to buy him his dream toy. ---A Hotwheels Carwash. Best $29.99 we ever spent. ---3 months later he wakes up, says 'I want to go potty like Daddy' and has been potty trained ever since."
"My daughter (3) can poop in the back yard without anyone knowing. I picked it up for weeks wondering why the dog's poop looked so weird. I looked out of the sliding glass door one day while my girls were playing. I saw my 3 year old pooping in the middle of the yard. Her older sister (5) sprayed her with the water house as soon as the log hit the ground. It was a spectacular scene, and I will never let them forget it."
Kids exerting their superiority like this is adorable.
"While leaving a family gathering, my cousin asked my little boy for a fist bump. My child refused, cousin said 'come on, why no fist bump?' My kid, 5 at the time, looks him straight in the eye and says 'I don't want to break every bone in your arm'."
Like A True Champ
"My 7 y/o daughter didn’t want our houseguests to go in her room because that might see her awards (good grades, tae kwon doe belts). She worried they would think she was famous."
Dinner On The Floor
"When my son was about 6, he was in the back seat with a friend, and he boasted that he had once thrown up his entire Chinese dinner on his bedroom carpet and you could see the food and everything."
"My oldest told me she used to control me from the inside when she was in my tummy."
Confidence at a young age is a good thing...to an extent.
"When my brother was two or three he rolled down the car window to get the attention of the gas station attendant and shouted 'hey mister, I got a penis!' He had a mullet, if that helps paint a better picture."
Voice Of Reason
"My 5 year-old son woke up with his voice hoarse from a cold."
"Me: oh, you’ve got a cold."
"Him, solemnly: no, I think i’m a man now."
"My 8-year-old son's doctor was trying to make him comfortable during an EKG by telling him he had to leave his ear with the doctor. They went back and forth for a while and finally the doctor said he would trade him the ear for a lollipop. My son said he would not give up his ear but wanted the lollipop. The doctor said, "What! That is not a fair trade. What will you give me for the lollipop?" My son answered dead serious, "I get the lollipop and you get my respect."
"Had an Amber Alert hit my phone one night while my then 6yo was playing a game on it. She asks what that was and I explained it was a message that gets sent out of a kid getting kidnapped. She looks at it again and sees it’s for a town over two hours from where we live. She then asks me why they sent to if it’s so far away. I said because they want everyone to look and find the kid, wouldn’t you want everyone to look if you got kidnapped? They want to find the kid so they don’t get killed. She leans over close to my ear and whispers “I’m very difficult to kill”
"I had to mute the Amber Alerts on my phone. My son saw one when he was five years old, and asked me about it, so I explained it. Every hour or two, for almost a week afterward, he'd ask me, "Did they find the kid yet? Mom, were you even looking at license plates when you were driving? You have to pay attention in case you see her!"
"When her body was found, my poor kid was devastated."
"He still writes down the license number whenever he sees an Amber Alert on one of those LED road signs, and sets it on the dash where I can see it."
"Not my kid - but a friend of mine was trying to teach his daughter to pick up her toys when she was younger. When she didn't do it one time, he told her he was going to throw away everything that was still on the floor. She picked them up and put them in the trash can for him."
"My son did something similar. When he was being punished my wife took everything (every toy) out of his room with him screaming and protesting the entire while."
"When she was done he had the fucking temerity to say “you forgot my books.”
"I thought my wife was going to stroke out."
"My son was four and couldn’t read by himself. As they get older taking books away is a more serious punishment (as it was for me as a child). But at this point, and especially since he was going to bed anyway, he was just being a di*k."
At seven years old, I bragged about my dancing ability at a Christmas party, even though I've never taken a dance class or busted a move that resembled any sort of technique.
I don't know where the impulse to demonstrate my moves came from, but there I was–up on a stage of the venue where the party was held–and boogey-ing the night away without a care in the world.
I remember seeing my gobsmacked parents, nervously clapping and wondering what was wrong with me.
We didn't find out until later, but the punch bowl I kept getting refills from was, you guessed it, spiked...with what must've been gallons of rum.
That magic juice fueled my dancing shoes, non-stop, for about an hour, I was told.
I remain grateful this was years before the advent of social media and blackmail footage available for all to see. I'm more grateful my liver didn't shrivel up and did me in that night.
Men Break Down Which Phrases They Hate Hearing From Women
Oh, the things people say.
Sometimes you wonder if people have the capability to think before they speak.
It's an especially thorny issue in relationships.
Redditor Human02211979 wanted men to share about the things they're over women saying, so they asked:
"What's a phrase men hate hearing from women?"
I don't dabble with the ladies.
I feel like I'm about to be glad about that.
Thoughts?season 6 episode 24 GIFGiphy
“'Do you know why I pulled you over?'”
"It depends on how long you were following me."
"The food thing."
"'I'm not hungry or you pick... but not there not there not there not there or there.'"
"It's one of the most widely joked about relationship tropes... but it has to be one of the truest. I watched two married friends this weekend almost lose it over this lol."
"Frustrating for anyone in a relationship whose partner does this. I'm a woman and my male fiancée can't make a decision about food to save his life, almost literally. If you put him in a room with his 2 favorite foods and told him he can't eat until he chooses one, he would starve to death. It makes me freaking crazy."
Not Good Enough
“'They couldn’t handle me.'”
"Relationships are about building each other up, not constantly having to deal with the other person’s attitude or poor behavior/mental health. This is not as much of a flex as a lot of people think it is and raises major red flags for me."
"Dude this is so true, God *amn its true. These type of girls who say that are ONLY trouble and have no insight to why they act like they do. Its mental."
"'How can you not think anything, you must be hiding something.'"
"I mean sometimes it’s nothing but most of the time 'nothing' is just a random situation that makes no sense that I’m thinking of in my mind. I don’t know why I’m trying to think which animal would be the best drift racer and I don’t know where to start explaining the thought process behind it or how I even got there."
Say Nothingquiet tim and eric GIFGiphy
"'Do you like my friend?' Because it always ends up in an argument either way."
Oh that is a dangerous setup.
It's a Trapthe office no GIFGiphy
"'Tell me what you are thinking. Do I look fat? Be honest.'"
"'As a modern woman, you do not need a man to validate your self-image. Take a look in the mirror and tell yourself whether or not you look fat.'"
"Are you even listening to me, and I think to myself what a weird way to start a conversation."
"I sometimes forget that whenever my boyfriend is doing something like reading the paper, I have to get his attention BEFORE I start talking. Often ends in me talking for a minute before noticing an all too familiar blank stare on his face which prompts the question 'did you get any of that?' and then he repeats the last three words in an unsure cadence. Then I start from the beginning, lol."
“'How are you still single, you’re a great guy?' Hear it a bunch from some women friends of mine. I always just brush it off but kinda stings a bit more each time."
"I lived in a big house with lots of roommates. We had this big vent one night. We were going to go bar hopping but all the girls vented about how often they were bothered and hit on at bars. How they needed to go in groups to feel safe. And they never could go to just have fun with each other."
"2 weeks later I mentioned how frustrating dating can be at group dinner. There was a communal laugh about how easy it was. 'Literally just go to any bar.'"
Not my Owner
"Thankfully my current girlfriend doesn’t do this but don’t ever say you 'trained' your boyfriend or even friend to do something. Friendships and relationships are a great way to have a different perspective and take things on in different ways. To say you trained your friend or boyfriend is incredibly dehumanizing and makes you seem incredibly narcissistic and manipulative. Plus, you didn’t 'train' your boyfriend to use conditioner, you just made him realize that even though he doesn’t think it’s significant in his value system, it isn’t worth the fact you keep bugging him about it."
Oh LordCome On Man GIF by IdentityGiphy
"'I was thinking...'"
"Whenever my wife says that means I'm gonna be doing something that I don't want to."
"And it's always 'I was thinking we should...' There's no WE here, just come out and tell me what I will be doing."
Know your warning signs gents...
Anything else anyone would like to add? Let us know in the comments below.
People Break Down What Their Life Would Be Like If They Married The Person They Lost Their Virginity To
The first time having sex can be wonderful or excruciatingly awkward.
Maybe there is an in-between there.
But more often than not, it's not a fairytale, and that person becomes a memory.
What if they stayed more than a memory?
Ever think about life with that person?
Fairytale or nightmare?
Redditor Pristine_Arm_898 wanted to know if anyone had ever played the what if game, so they asked:
"If you were forced to marry the person you lost your virginity to, how would your life be going right now?"
My first and I together would make no sense...
Cheers?Drunk That 70S Show GIF by PeacockTVGiphy
"I would be richer but much more miserable. I'd probably be trying to drink myself to death."
"I think it would have been just fine. She was/is a wonderful woman. But I wouldn't trade the 40 years I had with my late wife, including all the ups and the downs, for anything in the world. And when she left me, she left me with two wonderful sons and two fantastic grandchildren."
"Same here. I was with a person I loved and if it would go on it would be nice. We split because love didn't last and if it would, it should be just fine. Now I am in relationship i wouldn't trade for the previous big love. I'm happy where I am. No regrets."
"Not good. He was a sweet down-to-earth dude who turned into a massive a**hole after he landed an amazing job opportunity and his dad got him a flashy car. It's like he turned into the biggest douche overnight and then dumped me over the phone probably because he thought he was now out of my league. My heart was broken, but life goes on."
"I learned many years ago that he lost this high profile job, and because he got this job through nepotism and not because he actually knew what he was doing, he couldn't find the same type of job or at least work in the same field."
"He got recommended by a company to get a degree (which they would sponsor) so he could return to the industry but he refused because he was under the impression that he knows more than everyone yada yada."
"He did nothing about the situation and ended up working at a gas station where he still is now, all these years later. I can't imagine how someone with this attitude could be a good partner in life. I would have been miserable."
The Good Guy
"It might be ok, but not nearly as good as it is now. He’s a great person and I’m still in contact with him, but we weren’t meant to be together forever."
"This is how I feel too. He was/is a great guy. His family is awesome and all my family loved him. Sadly I didn’t! I got a lot of flack for breaking his heart, but after me, he met his now wife and they’ve got a lovely family. I met my now husband around the same time and we’ve got 3 kids. I think we both thought we were happy together but I’m glad we got a chance to realise we were simply contented."
ForeversSmooch Love GIF by molehillGiphy
"The same. We are married."
"Same here. We were quite young when we lost our virginities together 15 and 16. Been together for 7 years and married for 2."
Sometimes it's forever.
'Nienka'Confused Wile E Coyote GIF by Looney TunesGiphy
"I’d be looking for my wife."
"Surprised I had to scroll this far down to find this response (assuming you mean what I think you mean)."
"A one night stand with a Dutch foreign exchange student. I woke up and she was gone. A note said 'Nienka' with a heart drawn underneath. That was more than half my lifetime ago."
"Probably would have been awesome for a year or two - she was a legit Penthouse centerfold girl. Guarantee she would have got bored with me and moved on pretty quickly. Then I probably would have gravitated back to the path I've been on for the last 40 years and ended up right where I am."
Seems to be happy...
"I’ve thought about this from time to time. She ended up getting engaged a few times but never married. Ended up getting pregnant from a sperm donor and has been a single mom by choice for the last decade. Recently she came out not exactly as transgender but more like non-binary. Seems to be happy. I honestly have no idea what would have happened if we’d ended up together. I didn’t and still don’t want kids so that may have been a stumbling block. Also I had severe wanderlust after graduating from university and ended up on the other side of the country."
"Not sure if I would have been interested in staying in our home town and I’m pretty sure she never had any interest in leaving. So… either things would have hit some major roadblocks and we’d have split up after a few years. Or maybe I’d end up comfortable and lose the desire to move away and maybe settle down and have kids. Unlikely though."
"The guy I lost my virginity to is Turkish, and we broke up partly because his mum hated my guts because he wasn't dating someone of their own religion, and then partly because I discovered he had a 'thing' for girls like Bella Poarch and who acted like her. So if I married him? I wouldn't know sanity if it smashed me in the head with a brick rolled in glue, then dipped in a bowl of razor blades and lemon juice."
Like A...Sexy Queen Of Pop GIF by MadonnaGiphy
"She married someone else. Divorced them, married me, divorced me when someone better off came along. So, if I was forced to marry her now, apart from the bigamy, it would mean I'd have to be a lot better off, financially, than I am actually am."
Sometimes that person is the best and worst.
Couples Who Shower Together Share Their Experiences
The longer couples are together, the more creative they have to be to have quality time together.
But quality time isn't always what other people think it will be.
Curious about the deeply intimate moments, Redditor Glittering_Age_9045 asked:
"What do couples do when they shower together?"
"I have disabilities that make standing for more than 60 seconds (especially in a hot, humid environment like a shower) very painful for me, so my husband showers with me to help me get clean."
"He washes my hair, scrubs me down, and makes sure I'm all taken care of. Do sexy things happen?? Occasionally, but for us, showering together is an act of deep love and care. I appreciate him endlessly for it."
Greatest Form of Intimacy
"This is what showers and baths turned into for me and my husband as he approached the end. During our last shower together, I shaved his facial hair for him, and it was just very intimate. I knew I had to cherish that moment, even though I didn't know it would be the last one."
"We'd always joked to each other that washing each other's hair is the greatest form of intimacy (quote from 'Brooklyn Nine-Nine'), even way before he got sick, but it really was true."
"Oops, now I'm tearing up at work!"
"We were both 30 when he passed, only four months ago. F**k cancer!"
"One says, 'This is so romantic,' while the other nods and shivers."
"I bought a shower chair, because if I'm gonna freeze, I'm gonna be comfortable. Then I bought a shower head with a stationary head AND an extended one."
"We talk about stuff, we play, we laugh, everything. It started during the pandemic when I was extremely depressed. I'd take a shower to cry away from the kids. Then he'd start taking them with me at night and just hold me while I cried."
"Now our showers are much happier."
How the Time Flies
"I awkwardly wait there while waiting for my girl to finish with her hair."
Water Temperature Disagreements
"My husband pretty much boils himself, it's crazy, and then he calls my regular warm water 'ice cold.' I love showering together but I do wish he would be a bit less of a hot water person."
"My husband walked in on me taking a bath the other night and the first thing he said was, 'Woah. It's super hot in here,' to which I, of course, replied, 'It isn't even that warm."
Hot Girl Problem
"You take your first shower together, and you realize your girlfriend is actually the spawn of Satan and connects with her homeland through the boiling of her own flesh until her mask has been washed away and her skin is as red as the devil himself."
"A milestone in every relationship."
"Spin in circles, making silly noises, while the other person says, 'Rotisserie chicken!'"
Unique Shower Set-Ups
"We have two shower heads. It is great. And seats built into each side. Came with the house."
"It is glorious to be able to sit down and relax with one shower running over your head and back while the second shower keeps your front and legs warm."
"But you run out of hot water twice as fast. SIGH. And every kid in the house insists on using the ensuite cause the shower is “better.” Can’t really disagree with their logic, to be fair."
"Shuffle round and round, taking turns to be cold and warm like f**king penguins."
Enjoying Each Other's Company
"10 years together, married a year, and lived together for about six years. We always shower together, and that’s where we catch up on each other's day, vent, or just talk and enjoy each other's company."
"Shower conversations are the best. My ex and I would end up just holding each other under the running water, talking about bills or plans or some such nonsense. I miss that. It was incredibly cathartic."
"My husband and I shower together every single day. It's not even sexual or romantic, it's literally for hygienic reasons. We started showering together when we were dating and it never stopped."
"Even when we're fighting, which forces us to talk about the issue. It's kind of nice being trapped in a small area with no other distractions."
"This made me remember the time my husband and I spent half an hour in the shower discussing whether or not lobsters are sentient."
While many people may think of two people to get into a shower together for far more intimate activities, these couples might argue that their showers together are already intimate enough. All aspects of a couple's relationship are important, but it's nice to set aside time specifically to talk and reconnect.
People Break Down Which Bad Movies They Absolutely Love
Cinema aficionados love to enjoy discussing and engaging in debates about their respective favorite films.
While there are many excellent movies in historical cinema, fans also enjoy trash-talking the absolute worst films ever made.
What they don't disclose, however, is the fact that they embarrassingly enjoy campy films and appreciate revisiting them behind closed doors.
Curious to hear about the films moviegoers secretly enjoy and appreciate while being cognizant of the fact that they're total garbage, Redditor HorsesSuck120 asked:
"What movie do you enjoy that you will 100% agree is a bad movie?"
Action movies don't aim to win an Oscar. Nevertheless, there's definitely an audience for them–even the really bad ones.
We Dig That One-Liner
"The Core. I’m paraphrasing here, but there’s a portion in the movie where everyone says it can’t be done; but one guy takes a drag on a cig and says: 'but what if…we could'. The entire movie progresses on that point."
Oldie But Goodie
"Flash Gordon was released in 1980, but re-released this year in 4K. Bad, but in the best way. (And that Queen soundtrack!)"
It Kept Their Afloat
"Deep Blue Sea. I mostly enjoy that one unexpected scene. Check it out!"
"Street fighter with Raul Julia as Bison and Kylie Minogue as Cammy."
"Oh, and a Samoan bloke as E Honda, because 90’s."
From Zero To 60
"Gone in 60 Seconds . Say what you will , but I can watch this everyday."
Campy films will always have a place in some moviegoers' hearts.
Dumb And Fun
"Fool’s gold. It’s a dumb movie that makes no sense but for some reason I go back and watch it at least once a year and enjoy it every time."
Can't Beat Funny
"Accepted. It's terrible and hilarious, has Justin Long at the peak of his teen movie years, and features Lewis Black as a version of himself as a jaded professor. So good."
We Love Ah-nold
"Batman & Robin is certainly a bad movie. I love it so much. It’s worth watching for Arnold and his puns alone. But the whole movie is just campy fun."
Sometimes we prefer the quantity of fantasy and animation films–regardless of quality.
"You know what killed the dinosaurs?"
"The ICE AGE"
"League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. It's so much fun and I love the Nautilus."
Wolverine Wouldn't Approve
"Van Helsing. It's Hugh Jackman, Kate Beckinsale ala the glory days of 2004. It's got a 27% on rotten tomatoes,. 6/10 on IMDb but there's something about the dry jokes smattered in what's supposed to be high tension scenes, or scenes of sexual tension. The special effects aren't the greatest but at the same time it also adds to the experience."
Hands down, the worst movie ever made in my opinion has to be the campy 1995 erotic film noir Showgirls directed by Paul Verhoeven.
The trite premise and performances in the unintentionally comedic drama were so embarrassing to watch, but the movie wound up becoming more entertaining for those reasons.
Elevating the rewatchable factor of Showgirls is the DVD commentary by solo comedy performer David Schmader, who leaves plenty of repeatable quotes that are absolutely hilarious.
Highly recommended viewing.