Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Love hurts. That is a sad fact. As much as love is a splendid thing, it also can be a painful knife in the heart. And one of the most relatable pains is that of unrequited love. When you yearn for another and one, they have no idea or two... they're just not that into you. That can be a heavy burden to carry. Having a crush is not often a fun secret to harbor. The best way to work through it, is to expose it, so that you can see what happens. Talk about good drama...

Redditor u/seculargoddess wanted everyone to discuss the times we all had to accept when we knew, a certain love had to be left behind by asking... What helped you get over a crush you had for years?

I've lost count of the amount of crushes I've had. I'm definitely in double digits and I've exposed at least ninety percent of them. And ninety percent of them... went absolutely nowhere fast. Alas. I will say that a large portion of the outcomes stung my heart a bit, but in hindsight... Lord did I dodge some mighty lethal bullets. Who can relate?

Across the Quad...

Season 3 Hello GIF by Friends Giphy

One day I saw her across the quad. I waved and she stopped walking and just stood there. I walked towards her and realised that she wasn't walking towards me. Then I realised she'd never walked towards me, never sought me out, never put effort into our friendship, let alone anything else our relationship might develop into. It took a bit to process, but that was the moment that helped me break free.

Luckywithtime

The Idea...

Well, for me, I kept telling myself that I did not fall in love with her, but with the idea of her. I had always imagined a future with her... I wouldn't bore you with the details, but yeah in those imaginations she seemed to be so excited about my presence, I mean she was in real life too (she's a pretty good friend of mine), but in those dreams, a little more, I guess? But anyway the fabricated and real girl were almost pole opposites in nature. So I kept telling myself for three years that the girl I actually had a crush on never existed.

I liked the girl in my imagination, and there, she liked me back too; it wasn't the case with the real one. So that's what helped me move on from her. She's still my friend, maybe we're not as close as we were before, maybe its for the best. I still sometimes get slight feelings for her, but I'm sure it will wear out with time.

PlatypusNo81

Shine On...

Ohh here's my time to shine...

So I got into this girl in middle school. I've had a mad crush on her for five, long freaking years. The reason why I didn't confess was that I was the rejected kid, zero friends and a weirdo and she on the other hand was popular, smart and intelligent. So I always admired her from the sidelines, under the radar and she was completely unknown of my existence. In High school I made a few friends, who told me to stop being a wimp and confess.

So I walked up to her one day in recess and confessed. She made a disgusted face and said that no way in hell she'd be with me and she was in a relationship anyways. I walked away disappointed in myself and feeling real down. Then a few minutes later her boyfriend came up to me, he said that he was listening from a distance and said he had chewed her out for her reaction. I know that I shouldn't have taken her seriously but I actually felt low for a month.

This guy approached me every day, asked how I was doing. Later on we made best friends. Later on the girl dumped him and he told me all that was wrong about her and how she was a complete jerk and I had dodged a bullet.

This guy helped me a lot in recovering from that blow and he's the reason why I'm actually making more friends

Note: this happened a year ago

Tl;dr : Girl humiliated me for confessing, but her boyfriend made best friends with me and helped me recover.

mistersinister10

Samies....

Yep Reaction GIF by Rosanna Pansino Giphy

Our interests were too similar. I liked girls, so did she.

AshCooper79

10 Years In

I had a crush on some guy for about 10 years. I finally decided to text him after he and his longterm gf broke up (I waited over a year). He did not seem uninterested, but it was so hard to get the conversation going. It felt like I was talking to a 13 year old boy who was only interested in motorcycles and breaking every rule on earth to look cool.

One evening he asked me if I wanted to meet up in town (we were both out with friends, precovid). He then proceeded to ask me if I was going to "perform oral sex on him.") I never responded.

CasiInAPumpkin

See there... the Lord does work in mysterious ways. All that time spent pondering what if, when we should be saying... no thank you. And a few of those, like many of us, always end up better as friends, you just need to remove the love googles. They make your vision blurry. Let's continue...

It's Time...

A lot of time. A lot of crying and a lot of time spent on my own.

pr1nc3sskn33saa

It's time. I thought I would never get over someone (we had a very odd relationship). But as time went on, I worked on myself. And now I'm with someone who was the best of all that other person, plus a lot more. Without all the negatives. Now I don't feel anything for the old relationship, but I check in and say hi as a friend here and there.

It just takes time. Can take years. It's like getting past an addiction.

appleparkfive

6 Feet back... 

Keep distance and get some hobbies.

lagaia_scienza

Definitely distance. I used to see him everyday at work and hang out after work. Then I got a new job, we didn't catch up after work so much. And the crush fell away.

Also everyone at work used to joke about us being a couple and how he was in love with me. I wonder if I leaned in to that thinking? And built the crush? Like would I have thought about him in "that way" if no one had put the idea in my head he was obviously in love with me?

WhoriaEstafan

All Night Long...

james mcavoy im going to be doing that all night GIF by Saturday Night Live Giphy

He rejected me and I sat up all night crying and eventually realized that the last 4 years I'd had a crush on him I had pretty much just looked at all the positive interactions and filled in the rest of the time by projecting a personality onto him.

2baverage

No

I asked her out. She said no. Ended up becoming friends. Still don't recall how or when exactly i got over her, i guess hanging out with her over the years made me realize that being friends is better than being together. She's a wonderful friend, though she still made fun of me for asking her out that time.

is-this-how-u-reddit

Facts

Facts GIF by Judge Jerry Giphy

The fact that I just stopped initiating the conversation and that was the last time we talked.

peanutcopter

It's going to be what it is. Don't sit on it for too long. One of the worst feelings is a missed opportunity. If they're meant to stay in your life after the reveal, they will. If not... ciao bella.

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