Life moves fast and chaos comes flying at us at warp speed. So it's a minor miracle when we look back at our life and see all of the craziness we've avoided. Like being struck by lightning. It happens more often than you'd think. So avoiding a strike here and there is a major feat.
Disasters and basic run of the mill stresses run amok, so be grateful when you can stand and say... "Never have I ever."
Who can relate?
Redditor u/poopcornkernelswanted to hear about people's strokes of general luck in life, by asking:
What have you managed to avoid your whole life?
I've never been to a Vanilla Ice concert. That's harder to avoid than you'd think, when all of your friends were obsessed fans. I'm a child of the 90's. It's a miracle I could pull that off, trust me.
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When you gotta go...
"Pooping outside. Not much of an accomplishment but during my employment for the US forest service I came upon the realization that I've never pooped in the woods and I'd like to keep that streak going."
"Kidney stones. I had problems getting on the right medication. Found one 5 years where the biggest side effect is kidney stones. Thank the lord it hasn't happened... yet."
"It is freaking HORRIBLE. Not to scare you, but I was in pain for about 3 months. It was insane. It's literally the most painful thing that's happened to me. I even had a mother of 2 with cancer say "I don't envy you, they're so painful it's horrible" which made me feel even worse."
"Apparently there's a high chance that once you have one another will come along fairly quickly due to... y'know... they're still being plaque in there and man, I am NOT looking forward to that. The moment I feel it I'm running to the doc and begging them for one of those fancy sound wave pulveriser things.
"Quite a few of my professors (biotech degree) worked in cancer research. They've all said that basically if you live a long enough, healthy enough life, cancer will get you in the end. The only way you don't get cancer is if something else gets you first. They also all agreed the only two things you should really, really concern yourself about in regards to avoiding cancer are - don't smoke/chew/use tobacco and don't tan."
"Everything else is negligible, so don't sweat all those sensational news stories about studies that say hot beverages cause throat cancer or using dryer sheets causes cancer. As one of them liked to say, "Life causes cancer."
"Edit: Of course, this is not to say that if you are healthy and avoid those two things, you will NOT get cancer, just that those are the two things that almost definitely WILL get you cancer. As well all know, sometimes cancer gets you anyway."
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I'm grateful to be able to say "Never have I ever" on a few of the big ones here, thus far. Fingers crossed that trend continues. I can attest, pooping al fresco isn't that traumatizing.
"Funny enough i was thinking the other direction: Debt. I've managed to avoid all long term debt up to this point. Dumpster diving to closed equity investments."
"It did mean there were times when we literally sold everything we owned and lived in our car... Starting out your life with debt is a handicap, and despite the struggles not having our future mortgaged has made it possible for us to survive."
"Getting stung by a bee or wasp."
"I was walking with a friend in high school down this wooded hill full of brush and debris. At one point, my friend (about 10' in front of me) turns around and goes "Whoa!" He doesn't say anything else, I follow suit, turn around, and there's a huge nest of Yellowjackets. Well, they didn't mind my friend, but he apparently put them on guard because me stepping over them enraged them."
"I ended up sprinting down this wooded hill, lucky my foot didn't catch on a branch or something. I ended up getting stung 9x I believe it was; Three times on my back, one on each ear (so much heat radiates from an ear sting), two on one arm, one on the other, and one on my legs. I couldn't sleep well for a few days, everything hurt."
"Addiction and pregnancy so far."
"You're lucky, for many people and myself including, it only takes a week to become physically addicted to opioids. A week on kratom and I'd get withdrawals even. It's so messed up. Opioid withdrawal is by far the worst out of anything. I can kick alcohol and power through the withdrawal a dozen times now, but not once have I been able to withstand any opioid withdrawal."
- user deleted
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I'd rather eat bees than watch "CATS." That movie nearly ruined movies. Talk about being traumatized.
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Considering how much money these films make, I understand that I am in the minority when I say that Marvel films have absolutely overstayed their welcome. What once seemed fairly innovative—the current generation of the MCU really took off when Iron Man proved to be a tremendous hit—now feels stale.
I accept it, though. These films are not for me and never have been. That's okay. But it'd be great if we could have more room for other great blockbuster films other than yet another superhero movie.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Ziggi28 asked the online community,
"What franchise has been milked to death?"
"MTVs Teen Mom. Although they still act like teenagers, the moms are in their 30s."
Part of me thinks the only reason it's still on is because MTV knows several of the cast members have no other way to make money and they're waiting to see if any of the kids become teen parents.
All of Them
"A better question would be what franchise HASN'T been milked to death. Something like 9 out of 10 "blockbusters" these days are remakes/sequels/rehashes etc."
If we have to have nonstop remakes, I wish they’d at least make good remakes of bad movies/shows that had potential but were poorly executed for whatever reason, instead of mediocre at best remakes of classics.
It's a "No" for Netflix
"Certainly nothing netflix has created. Get hooked on a show with solid potential and bam....its canceled."
Netflix’s Dark Crystal amazingly resurrected a Jim Henson masterpiece, set up an entire world to explore, and cancelled it after one season.
"Is the next Halloween really going to be the last one or no?"
Don't forget, guys: Evil dies tonight!
We'll repeat it 10,000 times just so you know for sure.
Friday the 13th
"When Jason started killing in Manhattan, possessing people’s bodies, and killing on a futuristic spaceship in outer space, I felt the Friday the 13th series was getting a bit ridiculous. Although Jason X wasn’t that bad."
Honestly, the franchise died with Jason X. The remake of the first—which actually combined the plots of the first four films—was actually pretty good but didn't go anywhere after that.
"Ben 10. I enjoyed the first 3 shows, 4th one is mixed for me, but that 5th show which is that reboot that came after was unnecessary and just shows that Cartoon Network is reliant on making money from toy sales rather than telling a good story from that reboot."
There were more than two? This is news to me.
The Walking Dead
"The Walking Dead. I stopped watching when I found myself actively hoping the protagonists would be killed in gruesome ways."
I stopped after Beth died, didn't watch it for a long time, went back to it—though I started from the beginning—and gave up right when Glen was killed. It was exhausting and a meandering mess all in all.
"I just got an ad for the Jurassic World: Dominion extended edition. Pretty sure nobody has been asking for more runtime of that movie."
That movie had no reason to be as long as it is and Laura Dern and Sam Neil are really slumming it.
90 Day Fiancé
"90 Day Fiancé."
"There must be like 20 spinoffs from that show, including Pillow Talk (which has former cast members commenting on episodes) and then a Pillow Talk for the Pillow Talk episodes. Not to mention the individual spin offs like The Family Chantel and Darcey & Stacey."
I can't believe this is still on. I must be dreaming.
"Grey's Anatomy. It’s so repetitive and just ridiculous now. I gave up in season 10, then tried again and caught up a few seasons but it’s just kind of relentless, ruins good characters and rapidly churns out new, forgettable ones."
This should is the definition of a soap opera. And to think it was once a big Emmy contender for a few years!
Admit it: You're so over these too, aren't you? We might as well be living in a time loop because some of these franchises keep coming back over... and over... and over...
Have some thoughts of your own? Feel free to share them with us in the comments below!
We've all displayed embarrassing behavior or actions at one point or another, and we can't seem to shake off the regretful moment.
It just replays in our minds like an endless boomerang.
We are equally embarrassed for those who may have done something spontaneously foolish and have no clue of the mortifying impact of their actions.
It's called cringe, and strangers online had plenty to say about the all-too-familiar phenomenon when Redditor brownGoddess01 asked:
"What is something you find REALLY cringe?"
There is a time and place for things. That doesn't mean the unspoken rule is broken.
"A disastrous engagement during someone else's wedding."
"This happened at my cousins wedding. My other cousin was proposed to by her bf during the reception. The cousin getting married eventually got a divorce and the cousin who was proposed to never got married. My grandma went to her grave calling the guy who did the proposal 'El Diablo.'”
Inappropriate Declaration Of Love
"I used to work wedding receptions. One time during the speeches I witnessed the best friend of the bride profess his love to her, in front of the groom and everybody. It was one of the most awkward/cringiest moments I’ve ever witnessed."
There are some things we do that we can't take back.
How Far We've Come
"my past self."
"That means you’ve grown. Respect."
The Moment We'd Like To Forget
"My mind randomly replaying an embarrassing moment I've done that I want to forget."
"Listening my recorded voice."
Some people love living their lives on camera. Some participants don't have a say in the matter. And others just don't wanna see it.
All The World Is A Stage
"Family bloggers. Constantly having your life recorded as a child can really f'k you up. Especially since a lot of the time the parents are just using their children for content."
"I will extend this to normal people who post every second of their child’s lives, they often hide under ‘it’s so my family can see it’ but it’s not really, is it? Or else you’d have an account just for family not your 900 additional ‘friends’"
Crying You A River
"Recording yourself crying on social media."
"when individuals share sobbing selfies. No joke, when my friend's sister and her children put their dog to die, she tweeted selfies of them both crying. and the deceased dog."
"Like, is it a private moment of mourning and not a chance for a selfie?"
"All these 'prank' videos getting millions of views."
"Edit: To be specific, I’m referring to 'prank' videos that are clearly staged."
Unsolicited Life Coach
"People whose lives are an absolute self-induced disaster and post selfies with motivational quotes telling other people how to think and live."
Being in the entertainment industry and knowing how humbling it is when there are more rejections than there are bookings, we tend to be our own worst critics.
So there's nothing more cringey than revisiting an old recording of myself performing at a high school talent show when my interest in theater was fresh and exciting and I already thought I was a pro.
Unfortunately for teenage me, I was blissfully unaware I had ways to go before honing my craft.
Let's just say that all those old VHS recordings of me performing an imitation of Michael Crawford as the Phantom of the Opera need to be burned.
Sex. It's great, but there can be a lot of drama involved.
We're human, how could there not be?
One way to make it easy is to say the right name when you're in the heat of things.
Seriously, we know this sounds like a small thing, but it's monumentally important.
Make sure you know your date's name.
If you don't, take your date to Starbucks and have it written on their cup.
It might be REALLY important later in the evening.
Redditor throwaway2356765 wanted to know your best excuses in the worst moments of intimacy.
"How do you apologize to your girlfriend after accidentally calling her by your ex’s name during sex?"
Sex makes our minds crazy. I say all sorts of nonsense.
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"Burn the house down. Fake your death. Move to Peru. There's no recovery."
"You're gonna have to run out the clock on that one. Just say you're sorry and take the consequences."
"Yup. Persistence is key. Apologize a thousand times until she forgives you. Cook her favorite meals a thousand times until she forgives you. Massage her back a thousand times until she forgives you."
"'I'm so sorry [Ex's Name].' Trust me it'll work."
"Unironically maybe if you can convince her you have early onset dementia."
"Call out a guy's name next time and really throw her for a loop."
"Call out your own name."
"Or her father's name."DZLars
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"Call out Kermit’s name next time."
Sex makes us all crazy.
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"Oh man, trust me as someone who calls everyone by another person's name... there is no amount of apologies to make up for that in this case. Just hope she cares enough to forgive - she won't forget though and may bring it up many times."
"Not sure, but if it helps to know, I accidentally called my wife our dog’s name during an argument."
"Update: It totally killed the tension, and we laughed about it. I am safe."
"I just had a baby and now no one’s name is sacred in my house. Every cat’s, dog’s, or human’s name is Interchangeable with the others."
"Tell her you called her name while having sex with your ex and you're just trying to even everything out."
"Perfectly balanced, as all things should be."
"Just say you're sorry and you didn't mean it, but don't expect that she will get over it easily."'
"This seems like the most sensible answer. My answer was basically grovelling, grovel and grovel some more and hope she can forgive you but don't expect that to happen right away but definitely expect to hear it in every argument for a few years to come as well."
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"The only way to salvage this is at the time by adding ' ...was never this good!'"
Be better y'all. It's an intimate moment and your partner deserves the basest level of respect that come with knowing their name.
Do you have other ideas to share in the unfortunate event of this happening? Let us know in the comments below.
High school... how the trauma follows everyone.
Who has a perfect high school experience?
I wish I could do it all again.
I would've listened more.
Redditor Resplendenced wanted to talk about the good ole days, and how we could've utilized them more.
"What is your biggest high school regret?"
I don't hate high school. But I don't love it. Long story.
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"Giving a crap what those people thought of me."
"This is why I was never interested in traveling back to go to a high school reunion. So pointless."
"Not being more confident. My inner voice talked me out of a lot of things that would have made my teenage years more rewarding and productive."
"This times 1000. Shoot your shot, and act like nothing happened when it fails. Confidence is 100% people pretending to know what the hell they are doing regardless of whether they actually know or not. Nothing that happened in high school is going to matter when you are 40. Just keep that in mind."
"Should’ve talked to more people."
"You kind of go through assuming other people don’t want to talk to you. Little do you know they think the same thing. I wish I was just nicer and more open to everyone."
"Do you think the majority of the people genuinely wanted to talk to others? And if so, do you also think this still applies years after high school, or does it dwindle? Just wondering cause in my adult years it's hard finding friends."
"Not understanding that it was just temporary; the toxic behaviour of other students, the bullying, the fake friends and stresses imagined. In the end, it was four years of my life and I let it impact me more than I ever should have."
"I came to say this!!! I’m a teacher and I tell my students all the time that this is temporary. They have to do 4 years then they’re free to do whatever makes them happy. They can go out in the world and get a job, go to college, trade school, etc."
"But there will always be a**holes who try to get you down no matter where you go, so you need to start practicing at a young age how much you allow them to effect you. I went to school with the same people K-12 in my small town and I still talk to 1. I left and didn’t look back, so I tell my kids they can do the same. Even when I visit my parents I don’t go out and see any of those people."
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"Not realizing what a hottie I was. My self esteem was awful back then."
We're all hot in high school. We just don't know it.
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"Not finishing school and dropping out. Although, I had no direction or any parental care at the time and was depressed. I did get my GED and i’m in my final year of getting a bachelors in computer science. Not bad for a high school drop out."
"Falling in with an unhealthy friend group. They were controlling and possessive, and I ended up isolating myself from other, possibly healthier, friendships. I was always warned about abusive romantic relationships. I didn't realize friendships could be abusive as well."
"Not dating and socializing. I never wanted anything to do with anyone, as much as people tried. I missed out on basic experiences which didn’t bother me back then but now I’m like i wish i did more high school kid things lmao."
"I was coming here to say that I should have completely skipped dating, so nearly the opposite of you. Dating in high school was horrible, emotionally destructive stuff."
"I wish I joined the school paper or something like that."
"I was the photo editor on my HS paper because I had a nice camera. It was like a key to the school. I could walk the halls and if questioned I was on paper business. I knew everyone and everyone knew me. Took pictures of all the pretty girls and took some to the darkroom to learn to develop so to speak. Cause I bought a fancy camera I had an amazing high school life."
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"Not caring about college/my grades."
"I had the opposite problem, caring too much about my grades leading to massive sleep deprivation."
Oh High School... what a time.
Do you have high school regrets? Let us know in the comments below.