You'd be surprised at all the ways you can injure yourself. And sometimes, if you're not careful––though what can you do, right?––you'll injure yourself in a totally stupid and even embarrassing way.
Picture this: I'm at home heating up some chocolate chip pancakes. Once they're ready, I grab a knife and a fork and dive right in. That first stab with my fork dislodges a single chocolate chip... that flies into the air and straight up my nose. Because the pancake in which it had once made its home has just come out of the microwave, said chocolate chip is flaming hot and sears my left nostril. I then sneeze, spewing what looks like chocolate mucus down the front of my face and ruining my pancakes in the process.
There's a reason I'm a waffle guy.
After Redditor InfiniteEmotions asked the online community, "What's the dumbest reason you ever got hurt?" people shared their stories.
"Long story short..."
My brother had a turtle. He would take it out of its pen from time to time and let it roam the yard. I watched it chomp on some grass.
I picked it up and was feeding it grass, amazed at how clean it chopped the grass. So I stuck my finger in its mouth.
Turn out it hurts really bad. I didn't want to hurt the guy so I had to suffer through it until he let go. He pulled his head into his shell so I couldn't pull my finger out.
Finally he let go.
Long story short don't stick your fingies where you wouldn't stick your dingie.
I closed the trunk door of my car on my nose. Still wondering how i managed to do that.
I once kissed a reflection of myself on the outside of a metal toaster while in use, and seriously burned my lips. Technically my first kiss...
"I lit the candles..."
Circle birthday cake. I lit the candles on the outside first. Burnt my wrists/forearms trying to light the candles in the middle.
"I put on a Tigger costume..."
I put on a Tigger costume when I was little and thought I could bounce on his tail so I jumped off my dresser and broke my tailbone.
"I was playing..."
I was playing dodge ball in middle school when a ball flew near my leg. You see, it landed about 4 feet away from me but that didn't stop me from... overreacting. My leg kind of spazzed out and I ended up kneeing myself in the face while I had braces on. I cut up the inside of my mouth, swelled up my lips, and lied to the nurse and just said that I got hit by a ball.
"When I was like 10 years old..."
When I was like 10 years old, I found a box cutter in a drawer and wanted to see how sharp it was. I decided the best way to do that was to cut across the palm of my hand.
It was sharp... I don't remember how painful it was but I remember staring at my hand for a few seconds before the blood started to pour out.
"I walked into a door..."
I walked into a door forgetting to actually open it. Resulted in a bloody nose.
"I had never seen a lacrosse ball..."
I had never seen a lacrosse ball. Didn't realize It was so bouncy and heavy. Threw it at the ground at my feet. It bounced up and hit me right in the nostrils. Blood everywhere and a new found respect for the bouncy ball of death.
"Not running, not playing sports..."
I fractured two metatarsals in my foot and currently I am in a boot riding a knee scooter.....I was walking, just walking. Not running, not playing sports, not kicking a rock. JUST WALKING!
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