You just found a new restaurant, and you're so excited about it. You sit down. You reach for your fork and knife...but then, something happens.
Something that changes how you feel about the restaurant.
Here were some of the answers.
The Spout Test
I worked as a server and occasional line cook for several years.
Number 1 red flag is the spouts on the soda fountain. Those things are one of the easiest things to clean in the entire place, so if they're mildewy that kills my interest in eating there. I'm fine with a bit of mess elsewhere, especially in a high volume place since it will get messy over the course of the day. But those spouts take multiple days of no washing to get to a point where they are noticeably disgusting.
What's ON The Menu?
Anthony Bourdain said dirty menus.
If they're not cleaning the menu they're not cleaning other things.
Can I Axe You Something
I went to brunch recently and the head chef/owner walked in the front door with an axe, walked through the dining area and into the kitchen where he proceeded to axe the walk-in cooler to shreds.
Not a chef but I think that's a red flag.
The Red Flag List
Hi, actually a chef here.
1- divorce your mind from the "bathroom is dirty" idea. Bathrooms are not always the responsibility of the kitchen and don't necessarily reflect the state of the kitchen. Also, bathrooms see a lot of use so it being untidy (NOT covered in sh*t but paper on the floor, etc) isn't uncommon, especially at peak hours. A clean bathroom is a sign of good management.
Same idea applies to menus.
2- check the glassware and silverware, and plates. If they're spotty there are two reasons. They're not polished, or the system they are using isn't being maintained. This is a good sign of very few f*cks being given in both the front and back of house.
3- If you have the opportunity to see the entrance to kitchen (from the outside) that should give you a clue about whether or not the kitchen staff is trained to take care of the premises. If there is a stack of empty boxes, bags of trash, litter then they don't care. Pests and rodents eat anything. If you leave it out they learn where to be. Then they find how to get in.
4- A little harder, but the trained eye and experienced eater can learn a lot by what is in the menu. Some places use whatever processed product their main liner sells them (Sysco, US Foods, Aramark, etc) They might be clean and well run, but still shitty. I suggest looking for the local places over the chains, though this doesn't always help.
5- server attire. Generally speaking, a well dressed staff means good service. It might not say anything about the food, but appearances count.
6- Are they busy? If they're in the main part of town and not busy that should tell you alot.
Overall if your first experience doesn't leave you satisfied (not WOW amazing, but good) then don't go back.
To you guys saying that the bathroom being disgusting is a sign of gross staff...please go work at a restaurant for a week. Unless you're talking about non-busy hours, the bathroom is going to get super gross in a matter of minutes. I could not keep up with the public's disgusting bathroom habits and still do the rest of my job, and I am a picky but fast cleaner. It was much easier to keep the kitchen and tables clean than the bathroom. For some reason, people think it's okay to stop being a decent human being in public bathrooms.
A New Buffet, A New Life
Personally I'm very cautious of any buffet at all. Whenever I've had to replenish food out at the buffet, the customers just f*ck everything up with the utensils, and sometimes the utensils for dishing the food is clean, so that means they're using their own forks or spoons that they've had in their mouths.
Then you have the little sh*thead kids that the parents aren't paying attention to, that are just grabbing food with their bare hands, or spilling into other foods.
Old people, like 80 year olds that frequent the buffets are gross enough when they're constantly coughing and clearing their throats, and spitting while talking in the line up.
Judge me for being judgy, but I've seen it first hand at nearly every buffet I've worked, but I won't go near one that isn't manned by a cook or server at the stations.
If I see customers in sweatpants and a t-shirt at a buffet, I order from the menu.
List List List
- When the menu has a large variety of options but they're not closely related to each other or even the theme of the restaurant
- Empty parking lots at peak times and an empty room
- When front of the house or servers don't know their menu
- When it takes 10 minutes just to get water
- Flies (Not gnats i'm talking about house flies)
- Dirty menus, cups, and plates
Tap Dat Sass
When I sit down at a bar I watch how the bartenders pour from their taps. If they stick the tap into the beer while they're pouring I stick with a bottled beer.
I was taught very early on not to do that and having worked at a lot of places where I've seen the smegma of built up moldy, beer residue, dead fruit flies that comes out of those things when they're cleaned, usually after many many months or years has passed in some cases...I'll always pass on tap beer if I see that shit.
It's an often under cleaned, uncovered, unwiped part of the bar and most people on the other side of the bar ever think twice. It's also a sign that other things like their soda gun and ice well potentially being cleaned and sanitized properly. Not to mention their rags aren't being swapped out and sanitized...the list goes on.
I don't bitch at the bartender, I don't make a scene, I just order a bottle because that isn't being handled by that establishment other than when they open it.
Also, don't get me started on staff snacking out of the garnish tray. Ugh.
Kiev Is Always Frozen
Son of a chef.
Oven chips. besides the fact oven chips are shit if they can't be arsed to hand cut potatoes I don't put much faith into the rest of the meal.
Anything that looks like a general piece of frozen food. Think chicken kieves, always look the same, shape size etc.
If anything comes out steaming hot that shouldn't be hot. For example Jacket potato, if that comes out and it's erupting with enough steam that the glass wear gets condensation, then it's been zapped in the microwave.
Melted cheese which hasn't got brown or burn marks on it (except on a burger) it;'s been microwaved instead of a flame
Service can tell things on the restaurant. If you enter the restaurant and servers don't pay attention to you, it can mean 2 things. They are too busy, or they are not motivated to work. If they are too busy, it means owner doesn't want to hire more people, which means the owner wants to save money or does not pay attention to his place. If he wants to save money by not hiring enough, he will do so in kitchen. If they are not motivated to work, there are problems among staffs or they are not getting paid enough.
I don't have a culinary degree, but I did spend 10 years of my life in professional kitchens.
Show up early and grab a drink at the bar. If the bar smells like dirty mop water, GTFO. If the bartender has to ask you what goes in an Old Fashioned, GTFO. If the bartender is a rude prick, GTFO.
If the front of house is bad, the back will be even worse. I consider the maitre d' as simply the guy who greets me, not necessarily how I judge front of house.
You can only tell so much from polished silverware. That's not hard to do and almost every place stays on top of it. Doing things like making sure there isn't any dust on the bottles behind a bar, even the ones that hardly ever get used and need a ladder to reach, that takes real dedication and attention to detail.
Other sure signs of trouble at the bar is last night's garnish. If your lime doesn't look and feel like it was cut in the last hour, GTFO. Conversely, if they use the good Luxardo cherries instead of the day-glo red abominations, you're probably at a place that gives a shit about ingredients in the kitchen as well.
Pastry student here!
Stressed waiters/stressed chefs. More likely to make mistakes. If their uniform is dirty (and I don't mean a small stain. I mean a stain that is at least several hours old. Bonus point if there's more than one.)
You see waiters, or chefs scratching themselves, touching their face, any part of their body. I can guarantee you they are not suddenly rushing to the bathroom to clean their hands after every face pat.
A bit gross to look into, but the mop water, jfc. If you walk by a mop bucket that smells like death, it probably hasn't been changed in several hours. If the table is sticky, but "clean," it means they are reusing dirty water.
Smudges on cutlery/plates. For cleaning them, there's a machine, but for wiping them down, there's a human that does not give a fuck.
At Italian restaurants, I look at the olive oil that's given on the table. If it's a light colored oil, then it's not that great in quality and they're cutting corners. It makes me wonder what other corners they're cutting.
My New Philosophy
I only really skimmed, but nobody really answered the question.
any kind of sushi burrito.
"always fresh, never frozen!" nope. sushi grade fish has to be flash frozen because almost everything has parasites. If they are actually serving fresh caught fish they are dumb about food safety.
lion king roll, shrek roll, any kind of "bombs", really big pieces of fish on nigiri: sushi for college kids and whoever is cutting the fish doesn't know what they are doing.
hearing water continually running behind the sushi counter. that means they are improperly thawing something that doesn't get ordered much, and whatever they are thawing will have most of the flavor washed away.
"Kobe beef burgers." They are lying. Flat out, lying, to the point where it's disrespectful because they think they can get away with it. (and they usually do)
"Grilled to perfection." You are at a chain restaurant
Perfect grill marks that only go in one direction. This piece of meat has never even been in the same room as a grill.
Red flags in general -
Almost all "pan-asian" inspired cuisine.
A paragraph at the bottom of the menu describing their philosophy on food sustainability, or saying (now this is a double edged sword) there is housemade anything on the menu.
Cocktail menus that describe in too much detail using words that people other than bartenders don't really understand, "gomme" "shrub" "oleo saccharine". This just means "look at me I know how to make duck fat washed bourbon".
I Can Feel The Pressure
Waiter, not chef, but I agree with a lot I've read here.
General cleanliness - if they can't keep the small things clean, they're cutting corners everywhere with hygiene. A good restaurant keeps on top of that stuff. Maintenance - again relating to cutting corners, if items aren't maintained, condiments and the like, then you can be sure that there are lapses elsewhere. Staff - this is an interesting one, but from experience if the staff don't seem to work well, together or not, there's a red flag that the restaurant isn't being looked after properly, leading to issues with the first two.
There's probably a bunch of other stuff I've missed. Truth be told, restaurant biz is usually high pressure, so everything, like cleaning, is done as quickly as possible. Often, that translates to poor quality. I usually go out with a skeptical eye because of what I've seen/heard. Some of it can be right dodgy...
ITT: a lot of people who aren't chefs.
There's not a lot that'll put me off tbh. Basically only if there's nothing on the menu I'm willing to try (I don't eat fish), but I'm willing to give anywhere a chance. Dirty toilets aren't always the responsibility of the staff, someone could have come in and ruined them just before you go in there and the place is so busy that the servers/runners haven't had a chance to clean(and it's usually before/after service they're cleaned)
Salt and pepper mills.... Hmm.... Any place I go to I'm hoping I'm not gonna need them, the food should be seasoned correctly to the chefs tastes so that extra salt is not needed.
In general if the staff are rude I'll probably give it a pass, but apart from that I'll give anywhere a go, it's a good way to get inspiration for new stuff too and what not to do sometimes.
All of us have fears which some might call irrational.
Up to and including ghosts, witches, monsters.
But more often than not, reality can be far scarier than the supernatural.
And there are very few people indeed who don't have a memory of a moment when they were truly and genuinely scared.
And not by an otherworldly encounter, but by things that could quite literally happen to anyone.
Redditor GodhimselfUwU was curious to hear the scariest experiences people have lived through, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest non-supernatural thing that ever happened to you?"
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2Open Range Running GIF by Reconnecting RootsGiphy
Uncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42Scared Woods GIF by Brat TVGiphy
A near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- ApplesintheorchardDog Bouncing GIF by AFV PetsGiphy
Had no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
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Having to work for a living is hard work.
Some jobs come with difficulty and two extra sides of stress.
So the last thing people need is unwarranted hate.
I'm so glad I work from home. Writing alone.
I have issues with me, but that I can deal with.
I do hate internet issues.
But that is warranted.
Redditor PM_ME_URFOOD wanted to talk about the jobs where a ridiculous amount of vitriol is all part of a days work. They asked:
"What profession gets an unjustified amount of hate?"
Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy HoursFail Just For Laughs GIFGiphy
"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
Too much stress...Jim Carrey Omg GIFGiphy
"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Toowill birth control GIFGiphy
"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
No Fun InvolvedAngry Neil Flynn GIFGiphy
"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
"Giving birth (In the us)"
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is HardioGIF by VIASWEATGiphy
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
Two Volcanosrachael ray boob sweat GIF by First We Feast: Hot OnesGiphy
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
ExpensiveHappy Music Video GIF by DJ MustardGiphy
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
Attempted MurderBlack Woman Breast Cancer Awareness GIF by Know Your GirlsGiphy
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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