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Biliginual People Share Times They've Overheard People Trash Talking Them And Clapped Back

Biliginual People Share Times They've Overheard People Trash Talking Them And Clapped Back

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Even if you think the other person can't understand you.....they probably can. And then that's very embarrassing for you. So just don't do it or you might end up like these people.

overcastx14 asked:

People of Reddit who speak a language they don't look like they would speak, have you ever had someone talk bad about you in your second language? What happened after?

Here are some of the stories.

Dolor

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I'm white but reasonably fluent in Korean. When I went to an orthopedist in Korea for elbow pain a translator was provided by the hospital and I figured I might as well talk through him in case there was any specific medical terminology I didn't know. After describing my symptoms and a brief physical exam where I was visibly in pain, the translator told the doctor that he thought I was only pretending.

The thing was, he was doing an absolutely terrible job of translating even prior to that, so I quickly responded 'and you're only pretending to know English' (in Korean). The doc actually cracked a smile and the translator spent the rest of my visit sitting in his seat without saying a single word.

Funny, But Whoops!

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Kinda the reverse, was visiting Hiroshima in Japan and walking around alone. Then i see a caucasian guy walk up to me, and in fluent Japanese asked me to take a photo of him in front of one of the monuments. For context, I'm Asian but I don't speak a word of Japanese. So after a couple of seconds i said "Uh.... do you speak English?".

Awkward silence ensues. He goes "uhhh... yeah". Easily made my day. We did make small talk after (oh hey where are you visiting from, etc) but went our separate ways.

Life Lessons

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Almost been on the other side once. I live near german border. Once, together with my wife and daughter we decided to go to nearby german town for shopping. While we are entering a mall, my daughter (`13-14yo) tells me how cool is that nobody really can understand what we're talking about and we can practically say everything we want. In the same moment, security guard standing next to entrance grins and greets her with perfect polish "Dzie? Dobry". (Good Morning)

I didn't realize that her skin tone could get that red. I just thanked that man for mild but practical lesson.

Disgustingly Rude

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First time I visited Montreal was on a school trip. I'm from Alberta, and our hotel receptionist knew this. I guess she had assumed we couldn't speak French, which, looking back, was pretty stupid of her. What kind of school would send non-French speaking kids to the only French province? Anyway. One of my friends was having an asthma attack, and the receptionist muttered under her breath, "étouffé, s'il te plaît." (suffocate, please) To which I responded, "Madame, parlez-vous à tous vos clients de cette manière?" (Madam, do you speak to all of your customers this way?) Not super clever on my part, but it shut her up.

Inspiration

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Was sitting on the London tube on the way back from a long day at work, and overheard two older Irish ladies who had moved to London a good 40+ years ago speaking to each other in broken Irish.

They had just come from a Irish meetup event and were lamenting the fact that the Irish language was slowly dying off.

I was dressed in my suit like all the rest of the other city drones so there was nothing to single me out as Irish. (p.s I'm not ginger :) )

I leant over casually with a smile and said "Níl an teanga marbh fós" which translates to "The language isn't dead yet."

The surprise on their faces, and the smiles that followed were priceless, will never forget it! ?? ????

Ohhhh!

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I've got two cases of this. One is me, one is an old co-worker. I was on a train in the UK recently and it was pretty full. There was a French couple stood near me who ended up trash talking the people around them. As soon as they got to me, I interrupted and said "Stop. I understand you." They eyed each other and shut up.

The other one is the flip side! Ex-colleague's friend is on a train in France, drunk and trash talking (in English) one particular woman sat a couple of seats behind. The woman doesn't interrupt and sits listening to it all. When it's time for her to get off, she walks by the ex-colleague's friend and says "I understood every word you said." The ex-colleague's friend almost died of embarrassment and shut up for the rest of the journey.

Trash Talking Their Own Country

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I was on vacation in Turkey in 2016. On the first day I was at the beach like everybody would do. Of course I didn't know my way around the hotel so I just left my towel on the beach chair and went to my room to go on the toilet instead of aimlessly looking around the place for one. When I came back to my spot there was an older russian couple taking the chairs next to me. I laid back in my chair, put my hat on my face and just tried to snooze for some time in the shade.

A couple minutes later I hear the woman next to me saying "Look at those germans! Sleeping until until noon but always having to reserve the best spots early in the morning! F-ing nazis!" (in russian of course).

Some time later I woke up and had to pee again. I put my hat on the table next to me and asked them in russian "Do you undertand russian? Do you know where the nearest toilet is?".

The woman was turning so red you could mistake her for a tomato. Her husband told me where to go and so I went after I said thank you - in russian again. When I came back they were gone. I haven't seen them again until one week later on the flight back. To Germany. In the seats next to me.

I said I had hoped that they have enjoyed their vacation and asked if they mind me taking the seat next to the window so they wouldn't have to wake me mid flight to get up. While I didn't get any sleep on the flight they also haven't said a single word. Turns out they are living just a couple streets away from me since we all took the same subway and tram back home after landing at the airport.

Remember Finland

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I live in Finland and every summer we get some obnoxious middle aged tourists who feel free to comment on people's appearances in plain English. FYI: everyone here understands you from age 10 to 60 at least.

Little Snap Judgements

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My family is Georgian (the country) and I speak Georgian. This December, I went to visit family with an American friend. I stand out a bit but usually I'm not a dead giveaway, however she was. We (or I guess just I) overheard more than a couple of pretty rude, but honestly kinda funny comments in the streets, mostly from older people commenting on us being American and "dressing weird."

Disarming

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I'm one of the palest people I know, add to that blonde hair and a thick, northern (UK) accent I look like the last person on the planet to speak a middleastern language. We married into an Egyptian family and we spend plenty of time there, my Arabic isn't amazing but I can get by. I live for the horrified look on people's faces when I switch to Arabic. I used to do debt collection for a utility company and had a gentleman who refused to pay his bill. He called me all kinds of horrific names, I quickly told him in Arabic that I absolutely wouldn't tolerate language like that, that I was trying to help him and that he was bringing shame on his family. He stuttered for a good few minutes, apologized and ended up paying. However I got into trouble at work because all calls are recorded at the call centre and management were unable to review my call because they couldn't understand what I was saying. They were worried I could have said something offensive etc. So from then on we were forced to use professional translation services only on three way calls, which was an absolute pain.

Mountains Of Embarrassment

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Mine is a pretty general story. Nothing too exciting but it still makes me grin when I think back on it.

Was traveling in Austria, getting on a shuttle to go from Innsbruck to a small little town higher in the mountains. I was chatting and laughing with a few friends as I got on, my American accent on full display. There were two older women who gave us weird looks as we boarded, and we sat down across the aisle and just behind them. Almost as soon as we sat down, one turned to the other and said in German, "Stupid American tourists are always so loud." I was sitting nearest to them on the aisle, so I leaned forward and said in my far less perfect (but still understandable) German, "and you're not as quiet as you think."

It was a looooooonnggg ride of pleasant silence up through the mountains.

Compliments

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I look quite not italian, but certainly European, long dark hair and quite pale skin. At the time I was on vacation with my family, including my old grandpa suffering from Parkinson's and dementia and I was in the best shape of my life. We were visiting Italy and looking at all the old stuff my grandmother remembered while I pushed her around in a wheelchair in the hilly cities around the Garda Lake.

One day while my family and I were taking a stroll, I notice two ladies in their 40s discussing me in German, a language I don't speak, but definitely understand. The conversation sounded a bit like:

"Look at that handsome young lad. Pushing around his grandmother, he is so nice"

"And good looking too!"

Giggles.

Bad news my father and stepmother I was travelling with also understand German and I haven't seen my dad with that kind of s*-eating-grin for ages. So now I get teased about pulling old German ladies at family dinners.

Dutch Oven

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Just recently when I was in Malta. My friend is Bulgarian and she has friends from all over the place there too, so we all speak English. However I'm dutch and when were eating at this restaurant, there was this one old dutch couple relatively close to our table. The guy kept swearing because he thought we were too loud, but we really weren't, it just seemed they were a bit bitter and sour because they had nothing to say to one another. Swearing in dutch is a bit special too since compared to most languages it's incredibly harsh. It's basically wishing diseases like Cancer and Typhus to one another.

At some point he was just kind of mumbling swear words one after the other pretending to look outside the window, when even his wife was telling him to stop. So I turned and I asked in dutch "everything alright, nice weather out isn't it?" They replied back in kind and I didn't hear him swear for the rest of the evening.

Stop!!!

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I know a decent amount of ASL (American Sign Language) and was in my second college course learning ASL when this happened.

My younger sister's friend was going to buy a puppy and wanted me to go so she wasn't meeting strangers alone. The group of people we are meeting get out of the car and we realize they are Deaf.

The girl selling the puppy to my sister's friend starts talking to her and I'm just chilling off to the side.

Another girl and a guy were off to the side also. The girl was signing stuff about me and my sister's friend being 'hearing' and just rude stuff in general. I don't remember much, but the guy noticed I was watching the conversation. He told the trash talker to quit because he thought I could understand what she was saying. She blew him off and continued.

Eventually my sister's friend buys the puppy and as we are saying 'goodbyes' I sign, "Thanks for meeting us. Have a great day and have a safe drive home." I swear to god the dude that was telling the trash talker to be quiet earlier about pissed his pants laughing at her. It made my day.

My Glasses Can Hear, Too

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I went on a vacation to the keys like a year ago and I walk into the bathroom at my hotel and as I'm going to go into the stall this Cuban janitor lady sees me and tells me in broken english that I can't come in.

I say okay and as I'm leaving she says "Tiene espejuelos por gusto, No ve ni pinga"

Pretty much saying I have glasses for no reason and that I see f-ck all.

Now I'm a 6"1 white-skinned dude with light brown hair and green eyes, Far from a typical Cuban.

I walk back inside the bathroom when I hear her say that and tell her

"Miss, I'm Cuban too, I heard what you said"

She gets red like a tomato and denies ever saying anything.

And An Insult, Too

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I am fluent in Spanish because I lived in a Spanish speaking country and my wife and her family are all native Spanish speakers. But as I am fairly pale most dont expect me to speak Spanish.

One day when I was working retail I was helping this Latino family: abuela (grandmother), husband wife and kids; who all spoke English very well, buy a computer.

Since they all spoke English I didn't mention me being able to speak Spanish. However when I recommended a more expensive computer that they were looking at (the one they wanted sucked and wouldn't have been good for what they wanted to do). The abuela spoke to the husband in Spanish saying "this gringo doesn't know what he's talking about get the cheaper one".

I looked her dead in the eye and responding in Spanish said "I actually know exactly what I'm talking about as I have been doing this for many years." I then turned walked away to check and see if we had the one I was recommending in stock. The abuela didnt say another word the entire time they were there and they bought the computer I recommended.

Another story is my wife and I went to the Mexican consulate and when I asked a security guard where the bathroom was, he responded to me in broken English that it was down the hall to the left. it happens constantly.

Learn Your Lesson

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I was living in Jersey and got into a taxi. The driver was on the phone and started talking in Spanish to the other end about me; how he just picked up some white girl and then must've answered the "What does she look like?", saying I was cute for a white girl. I'm very light-skinned because I take after my dad, who's Cuban. My mom, who is Puerto Rican has very dark olive skin.

Once he got off the phone, I said to him in Spanish that he shouldn't always assume someone is a "gringa" just because he thinks they look it. His eyes about bugged out of his head and I laughed. He started apologizing and told him it was ok, because he didn't say anything too badly, but that I hope he learned a lesson.

Harrassment

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Not me but my friend. Arabic is her second language (her dad is Jordanian, mom is american). At the grocery store the two young guys in line behind her at check out were going on and on in arabic about her large breasts and what they would do to her. Finally she's had enough and turns around let's them know she understood everything they just said. They were obviously shocked, embarrassed, and said nothing.

Turned Out Great

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Somewhat related. I was on the bus in Chicago and there was a bunch of Chinese students on the bus. This old -ss white guy comes back there asking if it's the "Chinese section of the bus?" People are looking up slowly like WTF is this going? Old guy busts out some perfect Chinese. He'd traveled all over China with his brother after WW2.

Goodbye Losers

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We were visiting the Grand Canyon, and found ourselves on the same tour bus as a group of Germans. At the time, my mom was particularly heavy, which I guess one of the Germans took personal offense to, and loudly told her friends as much. Several laughed.

So my dad speaks German, and had a big issue with this, so he starts laughing with them and says in German, "that's hilarious! I like to tell jokes too. Want to hear one? It's about some very stupid Germans."

Needless to say, they did their best to avoid us after that.

He actually only recently told my mom what actually happened on that bus (at the time, he told her he accidentally offended them). She thought it was hilarious.

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

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Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

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Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

south park wedding GIF Giphy

See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

homer simpson episode 23 GIF Giphy

Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

Disney World GIF Giphy

The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.