High school is rough even under the best circumstances; a pandemic is not the best circumstance. Still, students are going to start school in some way or another shortly and for first-time High School students that can mean some major anxiety.
One Reddit user asked:
What advice would you give to a 14 year old about starting high school?
A lot of the advice people initially wanted to give was centered around what their high school experiences were - but 2020 is on a whole other level. So people offered up bits of wisdom that are relevant not just in school, but throughout life.
May I present to you, dear readers, an expert guide to High School and the fine art of not giving AF.
Forgive And Keep It Moving
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Forgive yourself when necessary. It's high school, you're probably going to do something stupid. If you have even a remote interest in joining something, try it out, but don't be ashamed if it ends up not working out and you end up quitting.
Basically it'll be way easier if you are able to forgive yourself easily.
Doubling down on the interest in things part of this. Do you. Don't be shy. You'll have regrets about not trying things just because you were shy. Ask a buddy to try it with you if you need support.
God yes! High school offers soooo many new experiences try them out while it's free (or cheap) to try. Shop class, home economics, band, rotc, cheerleading, football, soccer - whatever you think you will enjoy, do it while you can.
Balance and Pushing Through
It's going to feel like the most important time of your life, and the most emotional time of your life. But, what's important is finding a balance between grades and friends and work (if you end up working).
Some classes will feel pointless, and they are, but remember there is an end and it's important to try and get through them. It's those skills, learning how to study and how to get through things you don't like, that will serve you better than pretty much anything you actually learn in school.
"The One"
He/She is (most likely) not "the one"
To tack on to this: That first love will suckerpunch your decision making skills, no matter how level headed or mature you are.
Good lord, I wish someone would have drilled this into my head. I had a boyfriend that felt 'fated' for me. What a mess. It went on for about 2 years and was only fun the first 6 months. I should have cut it off early on.
A relationship in your teens, IF you have one, should be completely a blast. If it feels like work, get the hell out. You have your whole adult life to build and learn to work with your partner on issues. You don't need to do that in your teens.
If it hurts, (emotionally, mentally, or physically), it ain't love. Get out. Prioritise yourself. Be single. Have fun. Having a serious relationship doesn't make you more grown up. If possible, pick and choose your dates. You don't have to be monogamous to just one person. You don't owe anyone anything! This is the time in your life to be selfish and see what suits you. Treat life like a buffet and enjoy it all!
Hush and Pay Attention
If you have a secret that you don't want to get out, don't tell a single person. No, not even your best friend. Nobody.
Pay attention to the way your friends talk about your mutual friends to you. This is exactly the way they speak of you to them.
If your parents have concerns about someone you're dating or one of your friends, pay attention and listen to them. They are rarely wrong about this.
Overall, just try to have fun and grow. You will fall into the rut of "this sucks I can't wait to graduate" but you will miss some of it eventually.
- xandria
The dating one especially! My friends didn't trust my boyfriend, my mom didn't trust my boyfriend, THE SCHOOL BULLIES DIDN'T TRUST MY BOYFRIEND!
Did I listen? No! Was I lonely and vulnerable and thoroughly convinced he wasn't that bad? Yes! Did I constantly get cheated on? Also a yes!
Senior Wisdom
High school senior here.
The opinions of fcking 15 years olds don't matter. What they think is cringe probably isn't even that cringe. Do whatever you want and even though it's hard be yourself a 100%.
You might not be liked by all, but the ones who will, are gonna be good people.
Relax, Bad Grades Don't End Life
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Good grades make life easier, but bad grades don't end it. Even if you were to flunk out there are ways to get back on whatever track you want. Might not get into Yale with a 2.0 but after grabbing an Associates Degree transferring in for your bachelors is much easier.
If you flunk out, figure out what you want in life and get it. Having a goal is the first step to achieving it and can often give you the enthusiasm to work towards it. You can get back into school, I did, graduating with my Masters next week.
- Alfheim
Yes. I barely graduated high school. I had a 2.8 Gpa. I just didn't try, didn't care, and was not wanting to "be a part of the system."
Now, I got my sh!t together after high school, went to community college for a semester, banged out a 4.0 and transferred to the large state university and did very well. My family didn't have the means to send me to some expensive private college so had I got a 4.0 and got into the state college right away, or one semester later, it didn't matter in the end.
Agreed- not saying you should f**k off in high school, but its not the end of the world, nor does it mean you can't be extremely successful in life later. There is "permanent record."
Real Good Friends
Good friends --real good friends-- will push you to be your better self, encourage good habits, and want the best for you.
Anyone who tells you to act against that is an a$hole. Stay away from them.
This is important advice. Someone who tries to force you to do something you don't want to do is NOT a friend, and ESPECIALLY not a good boyfriend/girlfriend.
Great advice! I want to add something to it...
You reap what you sow. Push others to be their better selves. Encourage good habits in others. Have compassion. Love your friends and wish them the best. If someone calls you an asshole, try to figure out why.
90%
You won't remember 90% of the people you went to high school with a few years after you graduate.
- seanback
I've already cut ties with 99% of people from school two years later.
- Groxy_
Not even a few years. Like a single year later I found myself only rarely interacting with like 2-3 HS friends, everyone else was college or job friends.
- Eli_8
Set You Back And Cost You A Lot
My GPA upon graduating high school: 2.3 weighted.
My fiancee's GPA: 4.0 unweighted.
We both went to the same University. We're both in our 20's now and make $70k+ each. So what benefit did her high school GPA give her?
I got my AA in 3 years, then transferred to University and got my bachelor's in another 3, racking up $55,000 in student loans along the way.
My fiancee got her bachelor's in 4 years, then her master's in another 2, with scholarships covering 100% of her tuition.
Long story short: a bad high school GPA won't stop you from going to college or getting a good job. It's just going to set you back a few years and cost you a lot of money.
- poly_meh
WTF Was That
Practice better self reflection, stay quiet, listen more than you speak, and actually think about what you're doing/saying/thinking/feeling.
I had way too many instances where I looked back at myself and just thought "What the f**k was that?"
Also, you should know, when you're stressed your rational decision making skills drop quickly, even if you think you're fine, you're probably not. I won't tell you to talk with someone(god knows I never did) but each day when you get home take a look at everything you did and said, and try to reason out why without emotional justification.
Don't be afraid to keep a daily journal. I know it sounds lame, but it will help you keep track of your thought patterns and stressors.
Don't feel embarrassed to apologize for your (re)actions, even if the other person doesn't.
- Hissarus
OK But Care A Little
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If a senior makes a joke about you, laugh it off. Don't be afraid to be "the weird kid." Be open to other peoples opinions, even if you don't agree.
Meet people, pay attention. Homework isn't as important as they say it is. And lastly, you don't get graded by the class, you're graded by the teacher.
Bad advice y'all. The "dgaf about what anyone thinks" mentality is how we get kids without deodorant and adults who walk their partner on a leash and won't wear a mask.
Care a little about what people think.
We live in a society and you need to learn to function within its limits. Someday when you try to find a job you'll rely heavily on the personal connections you've made with people
I made this mistake as a younger kid/ first two years of college (17-20 [I was one of those dgaf scene kids to make it worse]).
Had rainbow hair, crazy clothing, wild and very noticeable piercings everywhere, etc. I fell into depression, kept my appearance the same, fell further into depression and bad hygiene. Luckily, like everyone can do, I got my stuff together and adapted while maintaining my individuality.
Care about what you look like and remember that at the end of the day you actually don't have to compromise what makes you who you are at your core. Shower, deodorize. Maintain your face (as best as possible, I know some aren't blessed with the stereotypical porcelain skin thing), your hair, nails, and hygiene. Most importantly your health - mental, physical, and social.
People will really only really network with those who seemingly look like they have it together, and folks who carry themselves as such, and at least a little professionally, especially as adults.
It's Not A Movie
High school is so romanticized in movies and the media, and although it's possible to have a great high school experience, don't try to compare it to the portrayals in movies. It doesn't have to be the time of your life, and I don't think you want it to be. Who wants to peak in high school?
Use high school to get prepared for college, and if you make some friends along the way, even better.
I didn't hate high school by any means but college was the true life changing experience. But that can vary based on the college you choose. Living at a state school is a lot different than commuting to a branch campus.
If you move to college then classes and studying become your full time job but then you have 8 hours a day and your whole weekend to do whatever you want as an adult in a whole environment catered to people your age. Compared to high school the opportunities are limitless.
- tonytroz
It's Only 4 Years
High school isn't everything. It's 4 years of your life don't glamorize them and don't think your life is over if they suck. There is so much more of life than you can even comprehend.
Also don't focus on being popular if you think someone is worth hanging out with/ dating go for it, screw school status. I think I would have had a much better time if I wasn't so afraid of hanging out with people who weren't above my social standing. The weird kids were having way more fun than me
Love Takes Longer Than A Few Days
If someone you meet says they're in love with you after only knowing you a few days and is persistent about it, immediately get out of that friendship and never look back.
i made this mistake back in the 8th grade and when I finally had the courage to leave the relationship, the kid spent the next year being really creepy around me until he ended up transferring. (Some of it bordering on s*x*al assault and harassment during the friendship which I only realized now.)
- 64Anonie
Everyone Is Faking It
"Nobody can understand my problems" isn't a thing.
Everybody is lying/faking it. Everyone has had bad days, good days, ugly days, pretty days, sad days, happy days, loss and gain... You are not alone in the world, and with just a little effort, you can find someone else to talk to with the same problems you have had.
Change It Up
Not all change is bad, but don't let the pressures of high school change your personality to fit in.
If you want to change your clothing, style, anything do it! This is the best time to. You may get some negative feedback but push past it- I know how this feels first hand.
Also find people you feel comfortable with, I made my first real friends in 9th grade because they wanted to talk to me. I could be myself and they encouraged me to be who I wanted to be.
- Chlo4012
Good Luck
Watch out for bitter teachers. Don't listen to them; they have no idea. They say that stuff because you will leave school in 4 years and they won't.
If a kid hits you, hit back harder, or they will keep coming back. If they do, take self defense lessons.
Never cry over a grade, ever. It is only important at 14. You won't remember your grades in 10 years.
If you ever want to really hurt someone, or yourself, see a counselor and talk about why. It can mess up the rest of your life if you don't and you've got lots to do :)
There is a straight path through school, there are infinite paths after school.
If you love something and are passionate about it, try to aim to do that with your life. You will be content even if you don't earn lots. Don't listen to people who say you can't do that. What they mean is they can't do that.
If you don't know what you might like to do with your life, try lots of different things and watch to see when you are interested and enjoying what you are doing. Whether it's gardening or singing, swimming or math, someone has a job doing that thing, so why not you?
Do not think there is anything wrong with you, there isn't. Everyone thinks that, it's normal.
Someone will break your heart in high school. Trust me, they are a dips@!t and you will be soooo glad that you didn't go with them when you're older.
School is really not very important. Finding what you love and a way to do that for a living, learning to be a good person and finding someone who gets you and wants to spend their life with you, now that's important. Not now, but it will be.
Now you are waiting to meet your best friend, the person who will make your life click. It may take years but if you are a nice person (and that's all it takes) you'll get there. One day you will walk through a door and they will be there and school, jobs, money, won't be important.
Good luck.
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.