Look, us here at George Takei Enterprises (not our official name) in no way support or endorse the actions described below. It would be ethically wrong and potentially incriminating to say that any actions describe thereafter are acceptable or endorsed by us, or society as a whole.
Still, you do what you gotta do. Life is hard. Get what you can out of it, right?
Reddit user, IFeelSorry4UrMothers, wanted to know what to keep their sticky fingers ready for when they asked:
"What's okay to steal?"
The thing is, sometimes the thing you're supposedly "stealing" is not really being stolen, per say, in that if the people who knew you were taking it would file charges or anything.
Sometimes they just don't care.
Getting The Work Done No Matter What
"WiFi from the Jack in the Box by my house."
KittenPics
"Got through grad school leeching from an unsecured signal"
cavegoatlove
"My first apt in 2010 didn't have wifi and there was no way 19 year old me could afford it. Luckly back in the day most people didn't secure their wifi so I had ~8 options."
pokemonprofessor121
We're All Under One Together?
"Living over a decade in Japan, I've come to the conclusion that umbrellas are fair game."
PM_ME_ALL_UR_KARMA
"Take an umbrella, leave an umbrella"
AZBreezy
Take As Many Pacifiers As You Can. Trust Me.
"After giving birth, anything in the hospital room that’s not nailed down."
MamaRebbe
"Kid was in NICU for two weeks after birth. The nurses would give me a new pack of preemie diapers every time I used more than 2 or 3 from a pack of 20, same for those Similac nursettes that came in six packs. I swear I went home with hundreds of diapers and formula bottles. Bless them."
Palolo_Paniolo
"It gets thrown away when you leave so…take it!! Less work for us. Also, formula and diapers are given free to hospital to create new consumers for that brand. We hand them off like hot cakes to help families but also, to screw the mega corporations. We are like drug dealers getting you addicted to pampers or Huggies, lol!"Sol_Luna70
The Office Space Is Entirely Open For Grabs
"Honestly? Where my fellow corporate office supply kleptos?? Don’t lie…"
C-O-double-M
"When I was getting out of the Navy packing up to move. I found about 150 black "For Official Use Only" pens. I kept 10 and took the rest back to the shop."
EducatedEvil
I Mean, Yeah, Sure
"2nd, 3rd, or home in a baseball game."
ElGrandeRojo67
"Stealing 1st would look hilarious because you know the pitcher would just be standing there like "tf do I do?""
orionthehoonter
"You can if the catcher misses"
Zkenny13
"For those not as well versed as u/Zkenny13, if the pitcher throws strike three and the catcher doesn't catch it, the batter may attempt to "steal" first. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen."
"If it does happen, the pitcher is still credited with the strikeout, but it ruins any perfect game attempt."
DasPuggy
It's Build Into The Price
"I have few,"
"Soda from McDonald, ask for water (free) and drain it or drink it and pour soda on it"
"Napkins from any restaurant"
"Ketchup"
"Plastic spoon and fork"
AllenProduction
That Ol' Moral Quandry
"Food. I feel like if someone is desperate enough to steal food they really need it."
DonAskren
"Sanitary products, diapers, baby food. If you ever see a poor-looking/homeless person stealing these expensive necessities, please do not report them to the store manager. These are essentials, most of which happen to be expensive. And if it’s baby-related, don’t report it for the sake of the baby :/"
Ligma_ballz973
It's "The Code," Apparently
"I’m a young female and one “ girl rule “ I would say is common to know is if you see a woman steeling period products( such as pads or tampons ) or baby products like milk or diapers, you do not say a word. You don’t know if that might be a mother who can’t care for her child because of financial problems or mental health. It could be a woman who can’t afford menstrual products. Even if it’s neither of these you never know a person’s situation and it’s better to stay silent."
Cheesefan1
Weird Some Places Put Laws On This
"Trash. It was thrown away, so no one needs it anymore. Stealing trash is actually illegal in my home country, Germany."
DartmitBart
The information super highway is a glorious thing, allowing you access to a myriad of products with a click of the 'Purchase' button...
...most of the time.
Where All My College Students At?
"Academic papers and textbooks. The actual authors don't see a cent of it, it all goes to the publisher who gets to charge like 40 bucks to read it once. Oh and also in order to submit to those journals, you have to pay for it."
Inkuii
"Definitely don't ever type "sci-hub.se" into your browser of you're looking for access to a paper. It certainly doesn't have a database of pirated journal articles, or really practically anything with a DOI..."
"ETA: you also definitely can't download the file as a PDF. And clicking the source on the left side will NOT copy the citation to your clipboard. And it's absolutely NOT mirrored at sci-hub.st or sci-hub.ru if your ISP blocks it........."
Lestalia
"For academic articles, if you email the authors they'll almost always send you their paper for free and be really happy about it too"
fluffytedy54
Higher Learning Should Never Be That Much
"E-Textbooks"
-ImpliedConsent
"Pearsons can go f* themselves."
lorenzomofo
"YES. The online textbook viewer is awful too."
"Once I had to buy a $230 Pearson math textbook, I hated it, and it had multiple wrong answers in the practice question answer key... I returned it 2 weeks later and just found a pdf online"
Taco_Guy3
Up, Up, Down, Down
"Old Nintendo games. If they refuse to maintain their old game systems then there's nothing wrong with emulating them."
User Deleted
"Yeah if you can't even buy a game anymore, there is no ethical argument against pirating."
"Technically you can track down an old physical copy, but at that point you're only benefiting some reseller, not the people who actually own the rights to the game."
itsamamaluigi
When You Absolutely Have To Edit A Picture
"Adobe products"
dansla116
"I’m still using a copy of Photoshop 6 that fell off a truck back in 2000."
mandobaxter
"I’m in my 40’s and pirated my fair share of adobe products over the years. A few weeks ago my teenager was trying to find an old pc game on steam etc. and couldn’t even find a way to buy it. I showed him how to sail the high seas and find it. Today he came to me and said “dad, I found cracked adobe premiere and got it to work”. Don’t think I’ve ever been prouder"
Trill_McNeal
This "Stealing" Is Certainly A Lifestyle Choice
"i think its okay to steal anything. the punishment you get for stealing shouldnt be because you stole. i think it should be because you got caught. think about it, if you steal a twix bar no one is harmed by it. there are millions more being made and thousands more at stores. as long as you dont get caught stealing or harming anyone, ANYTHING is okay to steal."
waq_lol
Just a reminder: The law is there for a reason.
But, you know, be smart about it.
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Art Sleuth Known As The 'Indiana Jones Of The Art World' Recovers Stolen Picasso Painting That Had Been Missing Since 1999
A Dutch art detective has tracked down a stolen Picasso painting worth nearly $30 million. This was the culmination of a nearly four year long investigation.
Arthur Brand, an art crimes investigator known as "Indiana Jones of the Art World" turned the painting into an insurance company earlier this month.
Breaking: I just recovered the stolen 'Dora Maar' by Picasso. Painted in 1938 and stolen in 1999 in Antibes France.… https://t.co/EfAsXOKezl— Arthur Brand (@Arthur Brand) 1553584033.0
The portrait titled "Portrait of Dora Maar", was stolen from a Saudi sheikh's yacht in 1999. For two decades the stolen painting was passed around in the criminal underworld, used as collateral for drug and arms deals.
This is starting to sound like a movie.
feels like this should be a novel and not a casual tweet https://t.co/z1h5tgwxtY— MITCH WILSON (@MITCH WILSON) 1553626444.0
@brand_arthur Wow, congratulations and thank you for recovering this beauty! "Indiana Jones of the Art World" is on… https://t.co/Xu6U2eZqql— Lisa (@Lisa) 1553659143.0
The newer Thomas Crown Affair is one of my fav movies and— yes— I’ll admit I love a good insurance angle https://t.co/vMO0BQrgDG— Admiral Waugh (@Admiral Waugh) 1553625106.0
@brand_arthur What?! You’re a modern day Thomas Crown Affair character! Has anybody from Hollywood called? I would watch it! 😍— NaplesSmartGirl (@NaplesSmartGirl) 1553623542.0
In 2015, Brand received word that the painting was in the Netherlands, though he wasn't sure which one at the time.
He spent his time pinning down the masterpiece until earlier this month:
Brand said:
"Two representatives of a Dutch businessman contacted me, saying their client had the painting. He was at his wits' end."
The unnamed businessman received the painting as payment for a deal. After receiving it, and finding out it was stolen, he wasn't sure what to do.
This is where Brand comes in. He contacted the Dutch and French authorities to arrange for the return of the painting, in exchange for the businessman's immunity.
Brand was only too aware of the painting's habit of disappearing into criminal deals, and felt this was his only chance.
"I told the intermediaries, it's now or never, because the painting is probably in a very bad state... We have to act as soon as we can."
You have to wonder how he had the willpower to give the painting back.
@brand_arthur My mother claims the 8.5 x 11 gold spray painted macaroni art depicting an owl I made her in the summ… https://t.co/SARxIT2zcy— JohnGrady 🌊 (@JohnGrady 🌊) 1553660357.0
@brand_arthur Can i please borrow the hat on that Picasso for Sunday brunch? Asking for a friend....— Alek Vutipadadorn (@Alek Vutipadadorn) 1553650311.0
Recovered as in making it look like new again or recovered as in retrieved from the criminal(s)? Because that black… https://t.co/zbwffgsthT— Skelly (@Skelly) 1553618870.0
this is one of the things i imagine my relatives think of me doing when i say im gonna get my degree in art https://t.co/c94sZzRvzr— Ken (@Ken) 1553621788.0
Shortly after that, Brand received the painting from the representatives. After unwrapping it, he hung it on his wall for a night.
"I hung the Picasso on my wall for a night, thereby making my apartment one of the most expensive in Amsterdam for a day."
The following day, the painting was verified for authenticity, and then turned over to retired British detective, Dick Ellis.
Ellis is famous as the founder of Scotland Yard's art and antiquities squad, and in his retirement, represents an unnamed insurance company. Ellis himself has recovered famous artworks such as Edvard Munch's "The Scream".
Brand and Ellis have both confirmed that the painting is in the hands of the insurance company who will decide what to do next.
Jonathan Gualpa, 19, of New York City was arrested in Rochelle Park, NJ, after allegedly stealing a taxi and making the nearly 2 hour drive there.
Gualpa was reportedly on his way to the Six Flags Great Adventure in Jackson, New Jersey. He only made it about halfway there before deciding to stop for a nap in the stolen taxi.
NYPD were alerted to the theft of the cab, and used its built-in GPS locator to track it to where Gualpa had stopped to rest.
They informed the New Rochelle Police Department of the taxi's location and when they went to investigate they found Gualpa fast asleep in the back seat of the cab.
When questioned by police after his arrest, Gualpa revealed his plans to go to Six Flags. The biggest problem with his plan? The park isn't yet open for the season.
Six Flags Great Adventure opens for business on April 6th, and it will be an additional 3 weeks before it is open during the week.
Gualpa was almost a month too early for his plan to have succeeded at all.
Some were understanding.
@kfor mans jus wanted to go to six flags— Eden (@Eden) 1553207634.0
Others were quick to note the park's operating schedule, and the similarity of the story to a certain beloved film.
Kid is modern day Clark Griswold since he didn’t appear to check the park’s operating calander before planning his… https://t.co/cvhxFbgyCV— Andrew Hyde (@Andrew Hyde) 1553206814.0
@OnlineHyde Dedication.— Joshua Liebman (@Joshua Liebman) 1553207144.0
THIS is the Vacation reboot we needed. https://t.co/3FCI2L7oGk— Baron Gwan-Moussaka (@Baron Gwan-Moussaka) 1553263520.0
@njdotcom https://t.co/7vKsfmElua— Sarah Cassi (@Sarah Cassi) 1553112660.0
This is like something out of National Lampoons. #WhenStupidStrikes #QMorningShow #BrandyAndNick https://t.co/sATEG0ZY1F— Q101 Hit Music (@Q101 Hit Music) 1553248812.0
Still others were a bit less understanding.
@KDVR https://t.co/sFKiJbNPPd— James (@James) 1553257472.0
Gualpa has been charged with receiving stolen property and has been released from custody, pending a court appearance and the taxi has been returned to the company it belongs to.
Six Flags Great Adventure is a pretty awesome place, and the crowds can be pretty impressive during peak times; if you're thinking of visiting maybe check the schedule before you leave, and don't steal a taxi to get you there.