As a society, we're pretty good at looking the other way when we feel unable or unwilling to help. Here, we try to get real about some of society's biggest "elephants in the room." If you want to help with any of these issues but don't know where to start, try reading more about it, bring it up as a discussion with a friend (or repost this article!), and look at related volunteer or donation opportunities that directly work against the negative impact. Thanks to everyone for contributing their elephants.
1. Much of the stuff we buy and use on a daily basis is made by modern day slaves, child workers, and/or in sweatshops.
The True Cost takes this issue on. It was very uncomfortable to watch - it feels like any clothing purchase will make me complicit in a horribly unfair labor system.
In particular, it opened my eyes to the poor conditions that led to tragedies like the savar building collapse, which killed over 1000 sweatshop workers.
2. How horrible the education system is, and how is hasn't changed at all in a very long time.
It's entrenched in its crappy ways, and it keeps getting worse. On top of that, special education! We just shove every student with a disability in a room together and tell them they're a "distraction" to everyone else, then give the assignments several grades lower than the one they're in. Don't forget that apparently all disabilities are the same, so the students with autism like me need to given someone to read their test to them out loud. It's a BS "hope the problem goes away" policy with no regard for the students it actually affects. That's not even mentioning that these students are almost always bullied simply for being in it. (Hurr durr, you ride a shorter bus etc.) Being told that being disabled means you can't use normal people classrooms feels a bit too similar to segregation for my tastes when you think about it.
3. Bacteria's growing resistance to antibiotics.
It really angers me that GPs are caving in to patients demands for antibiotics for things like the flu. The influenza virus is just that, a virus, antibiotics don't do anything to combat it. And yet the amount of people that say they are going to go get some antibiotics for their flu baffles me. I wish GPs had more guts to say "no, antibiotics are for bacterial infections, not viruses like your flu. Take some cough syrup, keep up with your fluids and rest up".
4. The ever-growing heroin addiction problem in the United States.
This personally, deeply affected my life. I've lost many friends to this problem. Even a partner. I still haven't recovered from that loss.
As you can imagine I've spent a great deal of time thinking of possible solutions, and without a doubt I truly believe the best option is to give it away for free in clinics across America.
Please let me explain.
There are 3 major problems revolving around this issue:
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1) People become addicted to opioids or opiates
2) People can get a cheap opiate off of the street
3) The addiction either destroys peoples livelihood, or it kills them
I want to preface this solution by clarifying, though the 12 step program works for some people, it actually very rarely sees success. Heroin addiction is a societal disease, not solely a personal one.
Part 1: Making Heroin Worthless
Giving Heroin away for free will de-incentivize dealers from pushing H, or other opiates. Dealers can not compete with free. This will get H off the streets and prevent dealers from offering "try before you buy" trials, which are a major cause of the outbreak on the street. Why would they put all that work into getting a kid hooked if he can just go pick it up for free at the local clinic? If you can't kill the snake by biting off its head, starve it out.
Part 2: Making Heroin Safe
There are several dangers involved with drug addiction. Sexual assault, violence, and theft can all stem from an attempt to get a fix. STDs can easily be transmitted by sexual favors (offered in return for drugs), or by dirty needles. Laced drugs can cause reactions unexpected and often times fatal. Overdose is often by accident when the user is misinformed about the potency of the drug, and they go into respiratory failure. By offering clean needles, pure drugs, and first aid on stand by, we can get people out of the dangerous element, administer non-lethal doses, prevent life-threatening STDs, and prevent death by overdose in the case that an overdose does occur.
Part 3: Making Heroin a facet, not an identity
There is term known as "functional addict". It means that, though the user is addicted to H, they do not allow their life to revolve around their addiction. Functional addicts have the lowest mortality rate because they are very clinical about the administration of the drug, and are less likely to go to extreme lengths to receive a fix. They also tend to have the best personal life. Holding jobs, going to school, and maintaining relationships. Unfortunately, this is a very small percentage of all addicts.
Beyond the chemical addiction of Herion, there is another reward system at play for those who allow their addiction to consume their lives. It's known as "The Hunt". It's a process in which someone (usually with little or no money) gets an urge to use, so they hunt down a dealer who has some available. Next they fight, work, or steal just enough money to pay for their fix. Then they wait for their dealer to arrive. Finally they administer their drug in a personal way known as "The Ritual". They do the same ritual every time they use. The next day they wake up, and do the same thing over again, and again, and again.
Heroin addiction is so much more than a chemical addiction. It's a lifestyle. The first thing any NA meeting will tell you when you're quitting is don't visit, talk to, or go to any of the places, people, or things associated with your hunt or ritual.
It has been shown in the lab that if provided with the proper stimuli, rats will not become addicted to Heroin if their lives are positive enough. However, under severe stress rats will become very addicted. You can watch the TED Talk here:
So how does this solution allow people to become functional addicts or even sober? The first thing it does is disassociate heroin with something personal or meaningful. It cures the urge, without creating a behavioral habit. This allows the user to distance themselves from the drug, and dampens the idea that the drug is an intimate friend. More importantly, it allows the user to spend the energy on school, work, or relationships that they would otherwise be spending on the hunt. This allows them to build a better life for themselves, decreasing their dependence on their drug for self-worth or meaning. Everyone may not become sober, but anyone can become a functioning addict.
Now there may still be people out there who live only for the high, but remember that this will not be the case for everyone. Regardless of how many people this converts to sobriety, it's an opportunity to give people, and especially teenagers, their lives back.
On the issue of big-pharma's involvement. This solution unfortunately does not touch that. The only way to stop opiate addiction altogether is to stop pharma's monopoly on painkillers by investing in, and lobbying for alternative, non-addictive painkilling methods.
Every single day I wish this had been available for those I love. The Hunt is what destroys the person and their relationships. Not the addiction alone.
Thank you for reading.
5. The amount of college students that will never be able to pay off their student debt.
The sucky thing is, the subsidized government loans were supposed to help college be more accessible, but really they just (Continued)
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they just enabled universities to overcharge by hundreds of thousands. Stop subsidizing, and many people won't be able to attend university because of the massive prices. Then universities will be forced to lower their prices to have a "customer" base. People get upset because the government isn't helping the needy, but helping the needy is what created that problem in the first place. A rock an a hard place.
6. The lack of support for the individual living with mental illness is reprehensible.
In addition to poor mental health services, there is a huge the lack of support for parents of adult children who are non compliant or so ill that they do not recognize the absolute necessity for medication and therapy.
The legal hoops parents are required to jump through to protect their adult children from themselves is daunting, exhausting and in many cases destroys families.
The individuals that suffer from complex mental health problems, their loved ones and in many cases the general public suffer. It is a public health crisis that needs to be addressed.
And from another contributor...
I have bipolar and it's been a huge struggle the past few months and years with the depression aspect of it. Meds take weeks to work and switching them makes you ill. It's hard to get an appointment with a new psychiatrist or your psychiatrist. Friends don't want to deal with you so they ignore you. No one knows how to help. Mental illness has such a stigma that you don't know where to reach out. You go to doctors, school resources, support groups, everything but nothing helps so you feel hopeless and heartbroken. You feel worthless and unloved and broken.
I went to the ER a couple of months ago because I had such an urge to commit suicide, I needed help.
I didn't want to go there because I knew I wouldn't get help but there was nowhere else for me to go. I honestly felt like if I was alone I would have hurt myself. It was the weekend so I couldn't get into my psychiatrist. I was put in a back room with a clearly unlocked cabinet of needles and meds and other things. No one checked on me for two hours. I understand that there's not much to do but even just one nurse there to sit with me or reassure me that I did the right thing by coming in would have helped. The doctors didn't give me any medication to help at all. I tried to get committed and they wouldn't let me. They told me to just hold off until my next psychiatric appointment (6 weeks later) I was treated like I didn't matter and sent home to an empty house. It was an awful way to deal with my situation.
It's the most hopeless and lonely feeling in the world when the one group of professionals that are suppose to understand push you to the side like you're an inconvenience to them. I still can't fathom how those medical professionals could leave a suicidal patient alone when they tried to reach out for help.
Then I got home and begged a couple of "friends" to stay with me but all they wanted to to was go to parties and drink that night. Idk what it was that kept me going but I'm still trying. It hurts and I feel like no one would really care if I was gone besides my parents. I could never do that to them, that's the main reason I'm still trying despite such little help. No one cares until you kill yourself.
I'm sorry this ended up turning into a vent. This is something I hate about healthcare and I don't want anyone else to go through situations like this.
No one likes talking about it before it happens, no one likes talking about it while someone is on their death bed, and no one likes it after that person has died. It's funny because when someone does die we rarely say they died, we say passed on, moved on, etc. while I'm sure we say things like "My phone is dying" or "It's dead quiet in here" more often than we realize.
Some years ago, my friend Steve's sister-in-law was dying of cancer. Everyone knew about it, everyone walked on tiptoe around her. Steve went to visit them, and sat down with his SIL in private and said, "You should make plans right now for what you want to happen when you die." (Steve's job is in finances, he's very straightforward and to the point).
His SIL looked at him and said: (Continued)
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"Thank you so much. You're the only person who's said 'die' or 'death' to me. Everyone else pretends like it's not happening." In a weird sort of way, it was a relief to her to have someone not walk on eggshells around her and actually acknowledge the inevitable: that she was dying.
8. Drug addiction & sex work
Treating addicts like criminals could not be more counterintuitive. Same with sex work. It NEEDS to be decriminalized. Most sex workers are doing it out of desperation, and they effectively become incapable of contacting the police because they're the first ones to be arrested and jailed if they do. It's horrifying.
9. For profit prisons.
I got sent to county jail (not prison) a decade ago for thirty days. I was charged $75.00 a day and was required to pay it off before they would even consider letting me off probation. $2,250.00 for one month, on top of all other fines, fees, and "service/handling charges." Not to mention, the incentive to throw people in prison and keep them there is created when it's for profit. In America, we have a system that is so corrupt, its goal is to put more people in prison and keep them there for as long as possible in order to try and make as much money off them as possible. That means that people are treated horribly (we're people!) and the thought of trying to make it a place where people can get the help they need to reintegrate into the world and become a healthy, functioning member of society, is slim to none. Because they WANT you to reoffend.
lupinedisco & anonymous
10. The growing political divide in the U.S.
Neither side wants to humanize the other, everyone feels the growing tension, and nothing's being done about it.
11. Giving away/hoarding personal data.
Literally everyone and their grandma trusts an anonymous corporate behemoth with their most intimate thoughts and messages on a daily basis (google, hotmail, facebook, etc) as if it were a completely normal part of life, and nothing bad could ever come from it.
12. In Canada, we forget our Indigenous people
Specifically here in Canada, the government is busy patting themselves on the back for planning to put a Black woman on some of our money because she was a champion for civil rights here.
Meanwhile, we continue to screw Indigenous people over and several decades ago they even went as far as to strip Indigenous women here of their Indigenous rights if they married white men.
My point is, for all of Canada's greatness we still (Continued)
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treat the Indigenous peoples like crap. Especially up North where illiteracy, suicide rates, substance abuse and other problems are much worse than in the rest of the population of this country.
The government here will pat itself on the back for letting in over 20,000 Syrian refugees (which is great, they should be doing that!) but meanwhile there are Indigenous communities who don't even have proper or clean drinking water.
My great-great grandfather, Chief Dan George questioned all of this 50 years ago during his now famous speech, "Lament for Confederation."
14. The suicide epidemic.
Suicide has been slowly but surely climbing the "biggest cause of death" list, and is bolstered by the disproportionate number of veterans who take their own lives every day, as well as young adults who have lost a sense of social solidarity in their community. No one wants to breach the subject of mental health, especially considering the cultural stigma against admitting/treating mental health problems in the USA.
15. The way we treat pedophilia.
Pedophilia is seen as one of the most horrific crimes out there, but we're not helping anyone by perpetuating the stigma around this mental illness. Yes, pedophilia is a proven mental disorder. It has to do with a cross-wiring in the brain that makes it so that instead of triggering a nurturing part of your brain when you see youth, it triggers the sexual part. Most pedophiles don't act on these impulses, but in the same way adults sometimes mistake people's affection for interest, it can be difficult for people with pedophilic minds to not read into a child's affection as interest. But here's the real problem. We treat pedophilia as a huge crime not just a crime to act on it, but a crime to have the disorder. So if a person with pedophilic thoughts goes to a therapist and says, "please help me. I know what I'm thinking is wrong and I need to figure out ways to help myself not act on this." that therapist is legally obligated to report that person to the police, and next thing you know that person is seen as a criminal, just for trying to get help so he/she won't commit a crime. How messed up is that?!
We need to create a way to help people who have pedophilic thoughts to find help, otherwise we're just going to have more people who are too ashamed to get help, committing crimes they know are wrong.
16. Human rights violations in North Korea.
People treat it as a joke to distract themselves from the fact that their leaders, nations, and themselves are complicit in the suffering of millions.
17. Casual racism that isn't considered "wrong" yet.
Yes, I know racism is wrong in any context, but casual racism/antisemitism against Jewish and Asian people is pretty rampant and accepted.
18. We waste more food every year than is necessary to solve world hunger.
Every. Single. Year.
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19. We can't keep living like this
The American economy is predicated on a level of consumption that, if adopted globally, would deplete the world's resources in no time. No amount of humanitarian aid or neoliberal development will offset the exploitation of developing nations required to sustain our lifestyle, or this contradiction within 'western' values of universal human rights. If we want to save the environment and help the global poor, Americans need to severely reduce consumption. Most people seem convinced that we have an overpopulation problem, but we have an overconsumption problem.
20. The flint, Michigan water crisis. People know about it, but nothing is getting done.
21. Robots are coming for us
Most human labor will become obsolete in the next 30 years. Our society's values are not compatible with a world where robots and AI do most of the labor.
So many corporations/governments/movements latch onto LGBTQ rights as a marketing or political strategy to try to promote a product or an agenda and appeal to the "trendiness" of being queer-friendly, and progressive people. It's sad, really, that being accepting has to be a trend or a political strategy (ie: let's say we're gay-friendly and they'll never notice the horrible stuff we're doing!), rather than a given.
23. Racism in children's media
For example, did you know that most animated kids shows will have the "evil" character a shade darker than the good guys? Scar (The Lion King), Ursula (The Little Mermaid), Dr. Doom (Fantastic Four), and so many other shows will make a "bad" character a shade darker than the rest of the characters. Sure, this seems like a small thing, but studies have shown that when shown dolls of varying shades of skin and asked to choose "the bad one" most kids will pick the doll with the darkest skin. That's as young as 3 years old. Just imagine how ingrained it is in our heads by the time we reach adulthood, and we aren't even conscious of it.
You know, I've seen countless "no texting while driving campaigns" and I agree with the premise. I think it is dangerous not to have your eyes on the road. That's how accidents happen. With that said, don't car manufacturers think it's counterintuitive to include touchscreens instead of knobs or dials in new cars these days? You have to take your eyes off the road to adjust anything. I think it's hazardous, especially if you happen to be driving in inclement weather.
After Redditor TheTenthDimension asked the online community, "What's your best example of 'Whoever designed this must not use their own product'?" people shared some suggestions.
"I've personally worked on projects..."<p>Here's a fun one. We just installed a bunch of new Kronos badge readers at work. The type you swipe your ID card to clock in and out. Everyone at work wears a lanyard that is attached at the top middle by a plastic strap, and your badge must always be displayed while at work.</p><p>Anyway when you go to swipe your badge in the new reader the card reader slot is too deep because the lanyard attachment on your badge hits the slot and prevents you from fully swiping your ID so you have to take your ID fully off the lanyard to get it to swipe now.</p><p>I've personally worked on projects at the Kronos headquarters, when I saw this design flaw I was not surprised one bit, between that and the usability of their web portals it seemed pretty par for the course for Kronos.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqn3t0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Brancher</a></p>
"I have a fan..."<p>I have a fan with a bright LED light that shows what setting it's on. Luckily, there's a 'sleep' mode that makes the light dimmer. Except another light comes on to let you know sleep mode is on, and that one is at full brightness. Just... why?</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqpcsw?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ArtemisJQ</a></p>
"Engineers must have forgotten..."<p>All TVs without at least the basic controls on the TV. Engineers must have forgotten the possibility of breaking or losing the remote.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqi1tq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">willbeach8890</a></p>
"Straps can stretch out..."<p>BRAS.</p><p>Straps can stretch out during a long day's wear. Whose brilliant idea was it to put the adjusters in the <span style="background-color: initial;">back</span> where you can't see or reach them?</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqlzt3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Aphid61</a></p>
"For someone who has a really hard time..."<p>The system to get help with mental health, like anxiety and depression. For someone who has a really hard time with making phone calls, it's tough to get help when every step requires more phone calls and appointments. Not to mention how expensive counseling is.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqsuv0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Ipomoeatricolor</a></p>
"To make matters worse..."<p><span>We got these new pin pads where I work and the slide part for the credit cards is at a 45-degree angle instead of completely sideways or completely up and down. To make matters worse a light illuminates the slide area, but when you're looking at it from the perspective of the customer it makes it look like there's nowhere to slide the card at all due to where the angle of the light hits. I've seen people struggle for thirty seconds trying to find where to slide their cards before I have to show them. Unfortunately, there are some functions where a customer has to slide their card and not insert the chip. The cherry on top is that these pin pads do not have tap to pay or Apple/Samsung pay functionality...</span></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqjbqf?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Grand_Corgi</a></p>
"Bathrooms in brand new..."<p>Bathrooms in brand new (and fairly expensive) homes seem to be designed for women by men who have no idea what the majority of women (and some men) really need.</p><ol><li>nice vanities but no real storage.</li><li>walk-in closets that you access through the bathroom, so if one of you is using the toilet, you either walk in on them or wait until they're finished before you can get to the closet.</li><li>beautiful walk-in showers with completely inadequate space for shampoo and etc</li><li>beautiful walk-in showers with nowhere to put your foot when you shave.</li></ol><p><span>Not about the bathroom, but in those walk-in closets, nothing configured for dresses or long coats.</span></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjrm865?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">product52403</a></p>
"The volume control..."<p>The volume control on a car radio should always be a twist knob, not a slider on a screen. There's no way to use a slider without taking your eyes off the road.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjrik9s?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">picksandchooses</a></p>
"I can't think of anything more infurating..."<p>McGraw-Hill products.</p><p>I can't think of anything more infuriating and less educational. My teachers use them for absolutely everything.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqsj9w?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">SuckMyClock</a></p>
"I once stayed..."<p>I once stayed in a "trendy" "designer" hotel which was clearly designed by someone who had never stayed in a hotel. The only lights were dim as hell mood lighting, and the windows were floor-to-ceiling with blackout blinds but no net curtains, so if you needed to see anything clearly then your only option was to have zero privacy. Never staying there again!</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kzwoa5/whats_your_best_example_of_whoever_designed_this/gjqf041?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inflatablefish</a></p>
If only all the things we excelled at were also the very things we loved to do most. But sadly, that is not the way it goes.
Instead, some horrible force of the universe made you way better at, say, sewing the holes of pants than playing guitar. The universe can be a spiteful, fickle jerk.
Art, Forced Upon<p>"Not me but - my friend has taken piano lessons since he was 6 years old and is f***ing amazing at it. But it was much more of a 'parents with high expectations forcing him to take lessons' sort of deal."</p><p>"He hates playing the piano, which is really sad...and his parents kind of suck"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6kydd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">SnooMarzipans9028</a></p>
Conditions for Very Good Work Ethic<p>"Cleaning. I f***ing hate it, so when I do it, I make sure not even the smallest stain is left so I can postpone the next session as long as possible." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6mfa5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">avadakabi***</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I have a weird quirk where, when I get sick, I have a compulsion to clean. Its like my brain says 'you are already miserable, you may as well do stuff that you hate so you don't have to be made miserable later, when you are feeling better.'"</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My wife has gotten to the point where she almost looks forward to me getting sick because she knows the house will be spotless by the end of the day." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6p160?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BranWafr</a></p>
The Introvert's Dilemma<p>"Being nice to people. I can be very pleasant if needed, but it's also very draining." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6ktfn?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nomadinlimbo</a><span></span></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"This is me as well! People are so surprised when I tell them that I identify as an introvert."</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"People need to understand that being an introvert is not necessarily always about an inability to act naturally in groups, sometimes it's more about how hard that might be. When I've spent time in social situations I feel completely drained afterwards." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6yg6n?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">DorneForPresident</a></p>
The Debate Goes On<p>"Coding. Never make your favorite hobby your job, kids!" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6nv49?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Mortambulist</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Too late. Turned my hobby into my college major and then into my job. Now I don't like doing it anymore lol." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj7kqs5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">SpecialChain</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Eh, or do. Often it works out. I held off going into tech precisely for that reason and did physics instead. Hated it and switched."</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I enjoy my job, it happens." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj7fs07?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ApprehensiveSand</a></p>
Can't Decide If Kafka Would Be Proud or Devastated<p>"Bureaucratic red tape type paper work. I guess I am just very good at filling out tons of forms and papers. Also sort of part of my job."</p><p>"I don't like it, but I am very good at it."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6m9x4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BigBearSD</a></p>
The Go-To Friend<p>"I am fantastic at moving furniture, either around the house, or from one home to another. I don't f*** up walls, and I can definitely get that bureau of yours through the doorway."</p><p>"But don't call me and ask me to help you move sh**, I'm busy that day."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6ng58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">InternetKidsAreMean</a></p>
Bad at Parties<p>"Being analytical. Life would be so much easier if I could turn my brain off and just have a knee jerk emotional reaction to everything like society expects right now."</p><p>"Pro tip: when asked about a current hot topic, 'I'm waiting for the whole story to come out' is not the correct answer."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj705jt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuerGrisaOstDrauka</a></p>
Doomed to Phone Duty<p>"I'm good at customer service, helping people on the phone, etc. but those jobs are soul sucking black holes" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6r01i?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TheRealOcsiban</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I so feel this. I've had a few customer service jobs, and I was very good at them but I f***ing HATE customers, entitled little sh**s, every last one of them, even the nice ones. Instead of picking up the phone or standing at the desk thinking 'how can I help?' I'd just be thinking 'WHAT do you want NOW?'"</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"But I was good at it, and as I think it's due to me genuinely liking to listen to people's problems and help them (just not in a customer service setting) I decided to retrain as a Psychologist." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj7pach?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Zhylia</a></p>
Hospitality Trumps Laziness, For a Night<p>"Cooking. I only cook for other people (I love throwing parties) but when I'm eating by myself it's takeout, ramen, and frozen meatballs all day. The idea of slaving over a stove for hours when I just want to grab a bowl of canned junk food and go back to watching youtube videos irritates me."</p><blockquote>Cook smarter, not harder<br></blockquote><p>"Still too much work."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6z7fl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ryeshoes</a></p>
The Logical End of the Game<p>"Monopoly, like freakishly good at it. I'll win every game. But people are going to hate me..." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj6ohmr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">sadpanda___</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My oldest son is like that. No one in the family will play with him anymore." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj753qh?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">momtimesthree</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"This is the way. The trick to monopoly is to grind the other players into dust. Slowly. Brutishly. Inevitably."</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Then you never have to play the wretched game again and as a bonus you've ruined the game for others. You must do your part to break the cycle of familial abuse that is monopoly." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kwvdr2/whats_something_youre_really_good_at_but_dont/gj7fjh3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nefariousinnature</a></p>
In a perfect world, family has your back harder than anyone else.
In the real world, it can sometimes be your family that cuts deeper than anyone else. Intentional or not, the people closest to you have the ability to seriously super suck.
No, you're not the only one who has dealt with a mom who just, for the life of themselves, can't NOT be critical. Or a dad who just always seemed chronically underwhelmed by you.
Too Young To Have Problems<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUzMjM3Mi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0NzU4OTQ4Nn0.IS0f7DOIDbguteBysLtbbRK28ICbWY8p6Q7DuQ0H_Yk/img.gif?width=980" id="09640" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="0b52e8847e8a71ba3bd6f885e7e10ac0" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="480" data-height="270" />sad carry on GIF by MasterChef JuniorGiphy<p>As a child (13) i was diagnosed with kidney cancer. </p><p>The news hit me pretty hard because, as a kid that had lost family to cancer, I knew how serious it was. My diagnosis threw me into horrid depression.</p><p>The mother of my step father (so step grandma) laughed at me when the news got to her because "You're too young to have problems so just get over it."</p><p>My mother was flabbergasted. She already hated the woman. Probably a factor in us cutting her completely out of our life once my step father passed - he had already been in the hospital for 2 years at that point and he hated watching the two of them (my mother and his mother) fight. </p><p>My mother sparred telling him for the sake of peace. He died without ever knowing what his mom said. </p><p>I'm still in and out of remission, currently doing good. </p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhlwlc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">metalicoe</a></p>
"Like You Ruined Mine"<p>When I (a married adult) told my father I was expecting a baby he said: </p><p>"Get an abortion, a kid will ruin your life, like you ruined mine." </p><p>Broke my heart. My kids are the two best things that have ever happened to me and my husband. </p><p>They are adults now and I cannot for the life of me ever understand how a parent could feel the way my father feels, much less understand why he would say such a vile thing. </p><p>It says more about him than me. His loss.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhmzb3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Veganmon</a></p>
Not The Call OP Was Expecting<p>Toxic childhood, my mother had no parenting skills. </p><p>When I was 15 she assaulted me pretty terribly for asking if she would buy groceries because I hadn't eaten in a few days. I moved out the next day and couch surfed for a long time. </p><p>After putting myself through university and getting an advanced honors degree, she called me... to tell me that I'm stuck up and think I'm better than my family.</p><p> I'm doing well now. I have a lovely wife who loves me, a good job even through the pandemic, and I haven't spoken to my family in a long time, which is for the best. </p><p>Still struggling through that for sure (guilt, anger, etc.), but doing alright with it.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhojy7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">AwkwardCranberry7</a></p>
Too Ugly, Too Dark<p>My mom wouldn't ever let me go to parties with her and my dad when I was a kid. She brings my sister and little brother though because they have light skin (we're from Asia).</p><p>One day I dressed up and got ready because everyone else did. And then she asked me "Why are you getting ready?" and I asked why "Aren't we going to a party?". She stared at me and told me "No... you're too ugly" in our language.</p><p>I'm 21 now and our relationship has never been the same since. I aged well though thankfully but it still stings whenever I remember it.</p><p>I also remember our most recent fight - I was mad that my sister who graduated college more than 5 years ago now still gets allowance while I, still in school, with full units, with a full scholarship, am working for my own bills and allowance.</p><p>None of my siblings had to work while they're studying. Now she even gets my savings and gets mad at me whenever I ask for it back. </p><p>I know my life's sucky right now but after I'm done with school, I'm planning on going no-contact with everyone and will build my own life and hopefully find people who truly love me.<br></p><p><span></span>Sorry for the rant. It's nice to let out a little sometimes when I can.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhkl3l?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">artmxs</a></p>
Not Exactly Worried About A Rapist's Review<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUzMjM3MC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxOTM2ODk0NX0.NMwYKi-EBJ9bpQ0GUjxSNKu3y9KRzGNdk4qeHWrC8H4/img.gif?width=980" id="afb3c" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="67bb89c5864aed944e8e133953536cf1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="480" data-height="444" />cat illustration GIFGiphy<p>I'm a pale woman with dark body hair. My mother saw that I hadn't shaved my legs in a while and said: <br>"You need to shave that hair off, what happen if you get attacked and they rush you to emergency and the doctors have to see that hair?<br>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhunb9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">grindelvvald</a></p>
Beat Me Stupid<p>My dad told me if I didn't change my attitude my future husband would beat me stupid. </p><p>I'm actually married to a very smart and kind man. My father is, and always has been, a piece of sh*t. </p><p>Me always being strong was what made my father hate me even more. He was abusive and would hit us. So this was a common thing he would say to break me down.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhaawj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">postylowkeyokey</a></p>
Too Stupid, Naïve and Immature<p>When I was in middle school I applied for a college training type program. They help you apply, gain knowledge etc while you're still in school. </p><p>On the way to the interview my dad told me he was wasting his money, gas and time on something so ridiculous, because I was too stupid, naïve and immature to ever be accepted into this program, let alone graduate hs or make it to college.</p><p>I spent that entire ride bawling my eyes out, aced that interview, and had my first two years of college paid for. F*ck you dad.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhf1sq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">GothSpite</a></p>
What Do You Even Contribute?<p>I (23f) got a notice in the mail saying that my insurance company was lowering my rates on car and rental policies. I told my mom (53) and she said, "rental? What do you even contribute to the house?"</p><p>I'm 23 years old, I'm a medical biller and make a decent salary for someone who has two years experience but not enough to move out yet. When my dad passed away at age 49 from cancer five years ago, I helped my mom a lot by helping her settle my dad's will, help her make financial decisions, cook, clean, signed us up for medical insurance, help my older brother (26) with his and her taxes I also helped him apply for school financial aid. I was a teenager. </p><p>I took time off of work take care of her after two major surgeries because my brother didn't feel "comfortable". I would drive him to places too. We use to share a car and I paid for over $100 a month for gas and he would only give me $20. </p><p>I snapped at my mom because I know if I didn't step up my older brother wouldn't even do anything. I told her everything I did and still do for this family. I don't mind that they rely on me to help them but I'm not going to set myself on fire to keep them warm anymore. </p><p>My mom did apologize and she didn't realize how much I did for her and my older brother. I accept the apology but those words still sting my heart.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhl6qx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Calypos_Luna</a></p>
I Left For A Reason<p>I tracked down my estranged mother a couple years ago after she had been gone from my life since I was 5. When she figured out who I was, her response was: <br>"I don't have a daughter. I left for a reason." </p><p>Then she hung up the phone and I just stood there in my living room trying not to cry. It hurt, but I made it 34 years without her and I have every intention of continuing to do so.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhizb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">feralhippie</a></p>
She Took My Hand And Said...<p>When I was 9 I adored my older sister (8 years older than me). I just wanted to be like her in every way. </p><p>One day I did something (probably an annoying little sister thing) and she took my hand, led me to my room and told me, "you don't understand how powerful the word hate is yet but you one day will and you should know I hate you. 100% hate you." </p><p>She said it so matter of factly and just walked out. It broke my heart. Changed me from that day forward.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhx4d9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">KaEcold</a></p>
After Mom Died<p>After my mother died, my first cousin's wife told me that I was no longer a member of the family because I was adopted (as an infant, FYI) and the death of my mother severed my membership in the family. I was 41 when she said this to me.</p><p>For an adopted child—at least for me, fear of rejection is an early childhood trauma you can't escape. I had WONDERFUL adoptive parents. </p><p>When she said that to me I half expected them to rise from the grave to defend me. They loved me, I am secure in that. But the knowledge that she felt that way and nobody else shut her down still hurts.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l3pq4q/serious_what_is_the_most_cruel_thing_a_family/gkhtkyn?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">CartoonistSpecific75</a></p>
Society is an odd conundrum when you attempt to wrap your head around it. This phenomena typically occurs whenever you witness a new trend or share experience and everyone seems to go along with it. Only much later, when you think about it with a bit of critical thinking, do you notice something might be off.
Going against society can be strained, difficult, like pulling back a sticker that's been on way too long, however sometimes it's necessary to get rid of what we probably shouldn't be so welcoming of.