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Famous Quotes That Are Always Taken Out Of Context

Famous quotes are like little nuggets of wisdom that follow us around and pop up at precisely the right time. But, did you know that many of the most famous quotes were taken completely out of context? Here, let's review some famous quotes that mean something entirely different when you know the story behind them. 

If you would like to read more about these quotes, you can check out the sources at the end of this article.

Sure, this quote is good, but the full quote is even better. It goes: "Great minds think alike, but fools seldom differ." That last part is intended to say that if you're always thinking of the same things as other people, you might want to start looking outside the box. 

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Well, not exactly. This was a misquote of the words of Leo Durocher (nicknamed "Leo the Lip"). He worked as the field manager for the Brooklyn Dodgers. When the Giants finished in seventh place during the height of the Giants-Dodgers rivalry, Durocher made an off-handed comment about the team finishing in seventh place because Mel Ott, the right-fielder for the Giants, was being too nice. 

Baseball Digest swooped in and later reprinted the column, changing "seventh" to "last." 

These misquoted words soon became the motto (read: excuse) for douchebags everywhere. 

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Cant you give me brains? asked the Scarecrow.

You dont need them."

This beloved quote from The Wizard of Oz is often taken out of context and seen at face value. However, when you place it back within the scene that it came from, it's easy to see that the message was entirely different. Let's take a look...

I think you are a very bad man, said Dorothy.

Oh, no, my dear; Im really a very good man, but Im a very bad Wizard, I must admit.

Cant you give me brains? asked the Scarecrow.

You dont need them. You are learning something every day. A baby has brains, but it doesnt know much. Experience is the only thing that brings knowledge, and the longer you are on earth the more experience you are sure to get.

That may all be true, said the Scarecrow, but I shall be very unhappy unless you give me brains.

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This is a quote by Vince Lombardi, who later stated that he regretted that being one of his most remembered quotes. I can see why! Taken out of context, it makes him seem like a bit of a rude guy. Here's what he had to say about it in an interview...

I wish to hell Id never said the damned thing, Lombardi once told a reporter. I meant the effort… I meant having a goal… I sure as hell didnt mean for people to crush human values and morality.

According to the New York Times, Gandhi himself never said this. This phrase, though rather inspiring, was diluted from various ideas that Gandhi presented, but he never actually uttered the phrase. What he actually said was: As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. We need not wait to see what others do.

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This popular quote is often used in contexts in which someone's overwhelming curiosity could lead them to knowing things that they might not actually want to know. 

What people don't often notice? This statement is missing the last half. 

The actual quote is "Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back." 

In this slightly more positive version of the quote, sure curiosity killed it, but baby, this cat's got nine lives. 

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Ahhh, this old thang. Verse 6:10 of 1 Timothy in the bible is a quote often used to talk about capitalism and it's seemingly inevitable roots in evil. However, like many other quotes on this list, this quote has been taken out of context. Though the real quote is fairly similar, it still changes the flair of it. It says, "The love of money is the root of all sorts of evil." 

So, it's certainly not to suggest that money is the root of ALL evil, and it's more about the ways that we regard and use money, prioritizing it over other things in our lives. All of a sudden, the quote seems a little bit more definitive, and I'm alright with that. 

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This phrase has been passed through the ages like a big ol' game of telephone, and there's no real consensus on what the original quote is. Originally, it was adapted into English in the 16th century from a Medieval French proverb. 

Another version to keep in the back pocket? 

Rome wasnt built in a day, but it burned in one.

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Again with the twisting of words to make them into easily digestible quotes! This concept was introduced in The Prince, by Nicolo Machiavelli. It essentially is used to describe a situation in which a good outcome excuses any bad things you had to do to get there. It's certainly an interesting idea to ponder!

However, the original wording was a little bit less spicy, and was simply said by Machiavelli himself, rather than explicitly stated in the book: One must consider the final result. 

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So you're going to see Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, are you? Well, look out for this scene, which is often misinterpreted in amateur versions of the play (and even some professional!)

When Juliet steps onto the balcony to say this, it is often thought that she is wondering where Romeo is. Actually, "wherefore art" doesn't mean "where", it means "why." Juliet is wondering why Romeo was born into the Montague family the source of all their trouble. 

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Many people attribute this awesome quote to Marilyn Monroe. It's a quote that reigns true with a lot of people, and has been seen as particularly poignant coming from the lips of Monroe, as she was often seen as someone who disturbed public ideas of what women were "allowed" to do at the time. It also spoke to the way that society usually judged Monroe as being unintelligent, and this quote is often used as an example of her under-the-surface intelligence. 

Though Marilyn Monroe was actually very smart, we can't credit her with this quote. The source is actually Laurel Thatcher Ulrich, who teaches on Women's and American History at Harvard. She is also a Pulitzer Prize winning historian, and overall pretty cool woman. 

The quote originally appeared in a 1976 article about Puritan funeral services. 

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Okay, time for another one of the many bible verses that has become popular but is completely taken out of context! That seems to happen a lot with the bible. 

The real version is similar to the original, but the slight changes to the wording make the quote mean something entirely different. 

The original verse (Proverbs 27:10) states: "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." 

So what was this actually supposed to mean? There are many many interpretations about everything in the bible, but here is one explanation from Thoughts From Shallot below: 

The phrase began among soldiers who fought shoulder-to-shoulder as The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. These men who shed blood together fighting for a common cause shared a bond that their relations would never understand. 

Proverbs 27:10 (pretty sure Ive used this verse ad nauseum) says Do not forsake your own friend or your fathers friend, nor go to your brothers house in the day of your calamity; better is a neighbor nearby than a brother far away. Throughout the entirety of the Bible, we see God using people whose families put the fun in dysfunctional. Josephs brothers sold him into slavery. Think about that for a second. Slaves werent hired servants, who were often treated badly enough. A slave was property, and he was treated as an object. He was less than a person. And Josephs brothers threw him into that sorry excuse for a life. Then, to top off that lovely little bit of familial affection, they deceived their father into thinking that he was dead.

 Lets talk about Cain and Abel for a second. A second should be all thats necessary, since these two have long ceased to be individuals and have become little more than a cautionary tale about the treachery of brothers. Abel did the right thing— so his brother got jealous of his goody-two-shoes siblings and beat his brains out. Real mature.

 Jacob and Esau? Those two made the Montagues and the Capulets look like the Brady Bunch.

Tell me again about how family is such a great thing.

Everyone I know who protests the point Im trying to make here is someone from a very close-knit family that understands the way God meant that social unit to operate. If thats you, then praise God, because He has blessed you in ways that a lot of the world will never understand. Im not here to rend asunder what God has put together.

But for everyone else— the ones who come from broken homes, the ones who could never confide in their father or brother, the ones who never knew their birth parents, the ones who are alienated from their families: you are not alone. God is A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows…[He] sets the solitary in families (Psalm 68:5-6.) Before the world was created, He predestined us to adoption as sons (Ephesians 1:5,) and loved [us] with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3.) God knows full well how broken human families are. But He is a perfect Father. And your adopted Brother? He took on mortal flesh just so that He could die to save you. He didnt just pull some strings from on high, no, He walked willingly to the whip, and the thorns, and the nails, and the spear, and shed His blood to make you a part of His family so that you need never be alone again.

The blood of the covenant made in Christ is by far thicker than the water of the sinful human womb.

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This particular quote is often used to justify nationalism to a most extreme degree. People believe that you should stick with, and agree with, your country, whether it's right or wrong. The quote is often used as a justification for war, or other cruelties that certain countries inflict on other countries. 

Well, that is definitely not how it was supposed to come across. The quote, said by German-American Carl Schurz in 1872, actually said: "My country, right or wrong; if right, to be kept right; and if wrong, to be set right."

It sounds a lot better when you hear it like that!

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Okay, so here's a quote that is used pretty commonly in modern colloquialism. It's usually intended to mean, "the proof is right within this thing." 

However, (sigh) this is also a misquote. 

The original saying goes back to the 14th Century, perhaps earlier, and the misquote was coined in the 1920s. So, we have a pretty long history of messing this one up. I have some good news, though! The original statement makes a whole lot more sense. 

"The proof of the pudding is in the eating." 

This phrase was intended to mean that you need to try out the food to know whether it was good or not. It's a great phrase to use for people who say they "don't like a food" before even trying it. You know who I'm talking about, Janet. 

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This is a quote from Alice in Wonderland, that has since been co-opted for use in popular culture, as a saccharine way to express the importance of love. It's even the title of several popular songs. 

Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but that's not how it was intended. 

In Alice in Wonderland, this sentence is spit out by the Duchess, who is a horribly mean character. She makes this comment in passing immediately after she advocates for beating her baby for sneezing. Not exactly the quote of a sweet, peaceful person. In Lewis Carroll's version, the Duchess was speaking sarcastically. 

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You know, it's a real shame that we've taken what used to be a really lovely phrase and twisted it so much. Sure, the devil might be in your details, but for the originator of the phrase, a brilliant German architect named Ludwig Mies van der Rohe, God was in the details. 

Yep, that's right, he said, "God is in the details" and we just had to come along and turn it into a steaming crap pile. 

Fun fact: Ludwig Mies van der Rohe is also credited with the famous saying, "Less is more." I'm pretty sure that one has remained the same over time, it's pretty hard to mess up something so short. Though, on the other hand, we English speakers really have a knack for this type of thing. 


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While this is a very beautiful quote, it is often said that it was intended to be said to a woman. Nope! Shakespeare, who wrote this famous sonnet (arguably his most famous) actually wrote it for a man. He wrote hundreds of sonnets about the same man, who is written about in history as his dearest friend, though it's hard to say whether they may have been romantically involved. 

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This quote is often used in an attempt to make Al Gore look like a weirdo. Despite this, Al Gore never claimed to invent the internet. What did he say? 

Gore told Late Edition on CNN, During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet.

Gore was referring to the part he played in funding the government development that led to the internet becoming the phenomenon it is today. 

It was Declan McCullagh, news writer for Wired, who later changed it to "invented" when describing criticism from Dick Armey of Gores statement.

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This quote went viral after Osama Bin Laden's death. It's most often attributed to Martin Luther King, Jr. In reality? It was pulled from the Faceboo status of a 24-year-old English teacher.

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This is commonly misattributed to Gandhi, but it's unlikely that he said it. Instead, The Christian Science Monitor pointed out that there is very similar wording within the speech of activist Nicholas Klein, delivered in 1918. Nicholas said: "First they ignore you. Then they ridicule you. And then they attack you and want to burn you. And then they build monuments to you. And that, is what is going to happen to the Amalgamated Clothing Workers of America."

Nice try, people. 

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You know that famous quote that Nelson Mandela said? The one that gets us through every day, knowing that we just need to look fear in the eye and say back off! I can do this! 

Well, it's not exactly what you thought it was. It turns out, Nelson Mandela never uttered these words. 

Instead, it was a passage from a self help book written by Marianne Williamson in 1992. 

The full passage said: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

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If you really think about it, this quote doesn't even make sense. The word "man" in this context is a synonym for "mankind", so saying this is essentially like saying, That's one small step for mankind, one giant leap for mankind."

Fortunately, Neil Armstrong didn't actually say this. 

The transmission was cutting out, and there was one word in the sentence that escaped our hearing: "a." 

Yep, that simple word made a big difference, because what Armstrong was trying to say was, "That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind."

Well... that is until you add in the controversy! 

According to Wikiquote:

  • In the actual sound recordings he apparently fails to say "a" before "man" and says: "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." This was generally considered by many to simply be an error of omission on his part. Armstrong long insisted he did say "a man" but that it was inaudible. Prior to new evidence supporting his claim, he stated a preference for the "a" to appear in parentheses when the quote is written. In September 2006 evidence based on new analysis of the recordings conducted by Peter Shann Ford, a computer programmer based in Sydney, Australia, whose company Control Bionics helps physically handicapped people to use their own nerve impulses to communicate through computers, indicated that Armstrong had said the missing "a." This information was presented to Armstrong and NASA on 28 September 2006 and reported in the Houston Chronicle (30 September 2006). The debate continues on the matter, as "Armstrong's 'poetic' slip on Moon" at BBC News (3 June 2009) reports that more recent analysis by linguist John Olsson and author Chris Riley with higher quality recordings indicates that he did not say "a".

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Hmmm, if you actually listen to the movie it says, "life was like a box of chocolates." Close, but no cigar. 

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Another little misquote! People usually quote the Queen in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs as looking at the mirror and saying this. In reality, she doesn't say mirror twice, but instead says, "Magic mirror."

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Henry David Thoreau is often cited as having said this rather whimsical quote. However, this is a diluted and twisted version of something he did say that (somewhat) expressed the sentiment. Who knows how the quote diverged so far from it's source. Here is what he really said: 

I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours … In proportion as he simplifies his life, the laws of the universe will appear less complex, and solitude will not be solitude, nor poverty poverty, nor weakness weakness."

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Thanks for reading!

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

south park wedding GIF Giphy

See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

homer simpson episode 23 GIF Giphy

Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

Disney World GIF Giphy

The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.