People Divulge The Stupidest Thing They've Ever Heard Come Out Of Someone's Mouth

People Divulge The Stupidest Thing They've Ever Heard Come Out Of Someone's Mouth
NDE/Pixaba

Some people's stupidity can just flabbergast you. Oftentimes it comes out in an unexpected moment. For instance, once I was curled up next to someone. It was a winter day in the wee hours of the morning, we were watching big fat snowflakes drift through the ice crystallized trees.



Because of this beautiful setting we got on the subject of how amazing nature is. They mentioned how powerful nature can be, bringing up the supervolcano at Yellowstone. This is where things went sideways, as they began to explain to me how if the volcano were to erupt it would result in a supernova in space.

Still not sure how they got there, honestly I just changed the subject because it seemed easier than a 5 am science lesson.

Redditor KarvedHeart wanted to hear the stupidest things others have heard.

They asked:

"What is the stupidest thing you have ever heard out of someone's mouth?"

*screams in geography*

“USA specific. I'm from New Mexico. In high school, I was talking with a group of people in my history class about where we were from. When I mentioned I was born and raised in NM, one of the girls (She was from Cali I believe) got really excited and asked if she could see my green card.”

“She had never seen one before, but she was positive that people in this state are given a birth certificate along with a green card. Because of the Mexico part. I had to explain that we didn't get green cards, because NEW Mexico is a state and not part of Mexico.” spooky_panic

How did they get into uni in the first place!?

“'I thought snow was just the dust that blows off mountains and rain was when the snow melted' 23 year old in one of my uni classes." ChemicalHedgehog6

avalanche GIFGiphy

They only wanted to pay for half the bottle...​

“I worked at a bagel shop and I had a customer come in with a complaint one day after buying some nestle chocolate milk from us. So here is how the story goes:"

“We had a guy come in and accuse us of selling and charging him for 2 bottles worth of chocolate milk inside of one bottle when he only wanted 'one serving'. I guess he thought it was a super large or something? (We only have one size, and it isn't that big) His reasoning for thinking that?"

“On the bottle of chocolate milk it says that a thoughtful serving is half the bottle, so he thought one bottle = 2 bottles of chocolate milk and he only wanted one. I had to explain to this guy that a thoughtful portion was just a recommendation by Nestle that he only drink half the bottle because it's healthier."

"And it's not that there are two chocolate milk bottles in the one bottle he bought. Then he told us we should be less confusing, and then I had to explain to him that we do not own nestle and do not have a chocolate milk factory in the back of the shop where we make and produce the chocolate milk."

"Then he said he no longer wanted it because he is "hearing now that it is not fresh" so he tried to get a refund on a half drunk chocolate milk and I had to explain to him that no, we can not do that. And then he left in a huff. I know it sounds unbelievable, but it really is true. People this stupid exist in our world as members of society." Timothy_McEvoy

“Left footed”

“‘How do left handed people drive?’ -my sister. As she then proceeded to try and drive ‘left footed’.” thats_up_top

Almost like teaching CRT is important...

“If the holocaust was real, why didnt the jews just get out? Edit: as in.....walk out of the camps they were held in.” Y_10HK29

I've had way too many people ask/"ask" me this regarding slavery. ‘Why didn't they just up and leave, or up and murder the enslavers? There's 50 of them and 5 of the family that owned them!’”

“Idk man, perhaps because a nation whose laws, economy, and customs actively supported slavery somehow didn't also have many pathways for escaped people to just waltz away and live freely, or much in the way of legal loopholes that would allow them to murder people without repercussions.”

“Plus when enslavement is race-based, anyone who looks a particular way walking around freely would draw suspicion from literally everyone who saw them.” Much_Difference

​But he became a real boy! 

“On a tour bus in Italy. A tourist kept asking to see Pinocchio's grave. The tour guide explained he wasn't a real boy. The tourist again said, but where is he buried? He just wasn't understanding."

“Edit: We were in Florence and the guide was sharing stories about Carlo Collodi, Pinocchio's creator. She later shared other hilarious stories about things tourists asked about." AlkahestGem

People Who Made A Lot Of Money From Something Totally Random | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

Some dad’s breath...”

“At an old job we had balloons in the office leftover from a kids birthday party in the restaurant. A server comes in, and says 'Oh Balloons!' She then picked a balloon up OF THE GROUND, opened it, inhaled the air and said hello all excitedly.”

“She then goes 'Oh! Why didn't it work?' Her face when I explained to her that wasn't helium she had just breathed in, but some Dad's breath that'd been in the balloon for hours, was priceless.” SergeantSGT

Disgusted No Thank You GIF by Shark WeekGiphy

My bother in law plastered baby oil all over his body and sat out in the sun for 2hrs. I told him he was going to get skin cancer. His response ‘I don't believe in skin cancer’. This is the guy who refuses to have a microwave in his house because ‘they are bad for you’.Cattangel63

To be fair his hair was fantastic and it was the 80s...

​“It blew my mind when I found out that David Bowie's hair didn't always look like it did in Labyrinth. I was maybe 7 or so, and while I understood the concept of actors, I just thought as a rock star in the '80s that he looked like that all the time.” BangarangPita

David Bowie GIFGiphy

And we have a winner...

“I worked at a hippy crystal store in the mall. These girls come up and are looking at our amethyst cathedrals. One reached out to touch it and her friend immediately held her back and pulled her away, yelling 'Don't touch that! It's Asthmathyst! Being around it gives you asthma'. She was genuinely upset…I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard that one." spooky_panic

“Water potatoes?”

​“All of these stories are great. Mine isn't super crazy, but it always makes me laugh. My wife called me while I was at the store probably two years ago and told me to get a few things. She starts listing things off and says ‘can you get me some water potatoes’ I had to stop and reboot my brain because that was a sentence I had never heard before.”

“I thought she was messing with me but nope! Deadly serious. After a back and fourth of her trying to explain to me what in the hell it was she was asking for, I find out she wanted water chestnuts. So now they're just called water potatoes in my house.” King_Metzy

​No that's definitely not it...

“When I was in high school, I took Latin, which ended up being about half language class and half Roman history class. One day, our teacher asked us if anyone knew what the Feast of the Lupercal was.”

This kid's hand shot up and he said ‘Oooh! Oooh! Isn't that when the Jews eat their foreskins?’ Class was effectively canceled due to laughter. After about 10 minutes, our teacher got up, went into the next classroom, brought back that teacher and told the kid to repeat what he had said.”

“He did, and the other teacher just stood there, mouth open and shaking his head. 20 years later, my best friend and I still get a laugh out of this.” LastLingonberry3221

It can't unhinge like a snakes jaw for goodness sake!

​“That I am technically not a twin because I was born 2 min earlier then my brother instead of exactly at the same time.” Kaporalisvarner

one of the girls dead serious asked me what it was like living in igloos...”

“When I was in highschool (I'm from Toronto, Canada) I went to Chicago and went on a boat tour highlighting the architecture of the buildings around the city. While on there I began talking to a group of grade 12 students on a field trip from a high school just outside of Chicago.”

“I mentioned I was visiting from Canada and one of the girls dead serious asked me what it was like living in igloos and did we actually get around by dog sledding. It took a lot of people to convince her that Canadians don't all just live in igloos. She even topped it off by asking if our bathrooms were the same. Me and my mom could not get over it.” ​AcanthocephalaLost40

​“I was at an all night coffee shop near a college campus. A jock was trying to impress his study partner with a 20 minute oratory that Watchmen -- the Zack Snyder adaptation of the graphic novel -- was ‘about love.’ His speech caused me physical pain from 2 tables over.”

“His study partner kept having giggle fits because she was watching me wince the whole time. Dude was trying so, so earnestly to impress her with his mind; I don't know how he didn't know he was getting laid that night, and it wasn't because of his brains. I wanted so desperately to walk over, hand him the condom from my wallet, and tell him not to breed.” Relevant-Slide2759

Wait mmmm, that's not how it works...

”My first time in the USA (I'm from South Africa), I met a girl and told her that I love being here but am sad that I'm missing my summer for her winter (it was December). She could not understand how it was a different season in the Southern Hemisphere. Could not comprehend Christmas in Summer.”

“Eventually I managed to convince her of this truth. A few days later, she brought me a gift and said Happy Birthday to me (my birthday is July 16, she said HBD on December 16). She figured that since the seasons are switched the months must be switched too…ziggyfro

Getting pulled over walking...

A cop stopped me one day, as I was walking home from the corner store. He pulled up in front of me as I was about to cross the neighborhood street and snarls at me... What are you doing over here!? I said well I live here.. what are you doing here?"

He says 'WELL WE GOT A CALL THAT THERE WAS SOMEONE RIDING A BIKE DOWN THIS STREET!' I couldn't help but let out a small giggle as I started to ask ok but why are You here tho?? First sir I didn't even know that was a thing."

“Like can people not ride bikes down the street anymore or are you only with people riding a bike down this particular one. ... In a low Harald and Kumar voice I added 'Is this your street, sir?' Haha so why did you stop and start questioning me then.. you realize I'm walking ?" SeirraD223

“Karen conspiracy theorist...”

“My mom thought america made covid to economically reset the world and she thought my brother was on vacation in North Korea. My mom is mostly smart but sometimes she just becomes some Karen conspiracy theorist for some reason." jurredbeste21

Not exactly, try again...

“A friend of my brother saw a picture of mount rushmore and said ‘hey guys, look at the beatles’. I mean, sure, i also think that john, paul, ringo and george should have been presidents, buuuut.” ​torpedolina

Well if these weren't enough to make your brain hit and want to fund education we don't know what will.

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People Break Down The Most Beautiful Places To Visit In The United States
Photo by Caleb Jones on Unsplash

America the beautiful.

So much to see. So much to experience.

Just because we don't have exotic oceans and ancient history doesn't mean there isn't majesty to take in.

There are many vacations to put together.

And now we don't have to use a paper map to plan.

Our apps and GPS have it all planned out.

Redditor driedkitten wanted to compare notes about the greatest ways to see the USA, so they asked:

"Where is the most beautiful place in the United States?"

So far the cliffs of California is my favorite part of the US.

The Falls

niagara falls GIFGiphy

"Subjective of course, but Crater Lake is certainly a sight to behold."

KaboodleMoon

"My home state of Oregon is full of beautiful places, South Umpqua falls, Illinois River, and Multnomah falls. Are some favorites."

jlp120145

Oh Hoh...

"A tie for Acadia, Hoh rainforest, and Rainier in the fall."

ParkLaineNext

"I was going to say Acadia. It's very underrated for some reason. My mom's friend by coincidence ended up being my English professor in college and we went on a trip to see family in ME. We stopped at Acadia for a day and she said it reminded her a lot of her visit to Greece."

NunChuckNorris007

"Hoh rainforest is absolutely devastatingly beautiful. Hiked the whole Hoh river trail when I was 17 and it's still near the top of the list for my favorite things I've ever done."

Hal9000_Red_Eye

In Awe

"Glacier national park. I was continuously in awe that the place was real life."

StrebLab

"The vistas of this road, on a motorcycle, were beyond breathtaking to experience. Would 100% do it again. Being on a bike allowed for stops at the waterfalls where there was no room for vehicles to pull over, and the views from the tunnels under the road were supernatural."

tastygrrrl

The Road Ahead

"There is a stretch of the Navajo reservation where there is no cell service, AM or FM radio reception. The road stretches before you for miles surrounded by red rocks touching blue sky. The buzzing undercurrent of modern connectivity fades away and your brain can be truly still."

tulleandtiaras42

"We did a little unscheduled off-roading in that area when we came to a road closed barrier. A Navajo couple pulled up alongside us while we pondered the dirt road heading roughly in the direction we wanted to go and assured us it was passable. Really lonely place... but wonderful."

KaleidoscopeWeird310

On a Clear Day

Mountain GIF by Sunshine VillageGiphy

"Mount Rainier."

WWDB

"If I stand right at the doorjamb of my front door on a clear day, I have a beautiful view. I owned this house for 15 years before I figured that out. You can't see it from any other position in the doorway, or if you're outside."

Wise_Ad_4816

Mountains are hot. That is all.

See the Country

Happy Dance GIF by PLAYMOBILGiphy

"Depends on what you’re looking for. The United States is a big place."

"For me - Hawaii is hard to beat."

Own-Willingness-3935

Beautiful scenery...

"Zion National Park is the most well-known place in Utah. But my entire state is an outdoorsman's paradise. LOTs of beautiful scenery in both the northern and southern parts of the state."

nekor18670

"Totally!!! And it’s very different. I personally prefer Southern Utah because the red rocks make me feel like I’m on Mars. But I grew up in the salt lake valley, so the mountains lost a lot of their majesty. But if I’m being honest, I miss them terribly."

Bye-sexual-band-n3rd

Smell the old growth

"I’m incredibly biased, but the most beautiful place is the California redwoods. Drive up 101, and then detour towards Petrolia. There is absolutely nothing like it. Roll down your windows and drive 35mph. Smell the old growth. Stop at the pull out. Take a small hike. It’s worth it."

Altril2010

"Yes, 100%. My brother lives in McKinleyville and I am going to see him the end of April. Can't wait. It's my happy place. They are like the Grand Canyon and Niagara Falls... you have to see them to believe them. Those redwoods are something else!"

strongy78

Utopia

"Yosemite! You drive thru the tunnel and come out the other side. Looks like heaven/Utopia."

Socalrdb

"Did a hike in Yosemite on January 1 last year. A spectacular way to start the year. I had seen photos of it, seen it in movies, watched countless videos on Youtube about it but -nothing- prepares you for the sight of El Cap as you turn that corner. I was very nearly moved to tears."

ThrustersToFull

Amazing

Episode 1 Boat GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

"The Shenandoah Valley. Its an amazing place if you're an outdoorsman. Hiking, fishing, hunting, bird watching, camping."

homoco4396

All the wonders of the world. I may have to check all of these out.

What did we miss? Let us know in the comments below.

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