It's just like The Shawshank Redemption, right?
Being shut in prison for a long time must be incredibly hard. And then as the time comes up to be let out, how would it feel? When your new reality has become being an inmate, what is the next step like?
u/usernamecensored asked:
Here were some of the answers.
Anger For Doing Their Jobs
I did 15 yrs 9 mths. Got paroled, and I didn't want anyone to know. Too many prisoners get flopped by the parole board (I did a six-month flop), and they get angry at the guys who get paroled. Guys will fight you just to try and get your parole taken, or some will see it at a chance to steal ("Hey, he's going home. He don't need that, and he sure ain't gonna fight for it."). I gave most of my stuff to lifers/long-timers who didn't have family to send them money. So, the last few days were really spent trying to take up the boredom of no way to pass the time. Didn't really work about work, already had a place to live (I'm one of the fortunate ones), just worked at keeping my head down and getting out of the gate.
Anticipation
I did 2 years, 6 months, 19 days for a violent crime I committed as a dumb 21 yr old. In the months leading up, I was basically walking on eggshells trying my best to make sure I didn't get into any fights, or any sort of trouble for that matter, that would get me put into solitary and could extend my time.
The night of I was just giving all my belongings away to friends: extra sneakers and clothes, soap and shampoo, polos for visits, cassette tapes, cooking utensils, food, books, etc. Everyone was grateful but definitely an odd experience to go through. Some of the younger dudes messed with me a little and roughed me up, more like in a friendly wrestling way and not actually fighting, but there was some added aggression in there as I could tell they were pretty jealous. I also made my last phone call from the in house phone booth to make sure my ride was going to be ready the next day.
That morning I woke up and was just like wait, this is really happening? Gave away any last minute stuff and said my goodbyes, traded a few addresses, and then was led down to the transport building for final preparations. After changing into street clothes, I sat there from 7:30-10:45, all the while with the guards telling me nobody was there to pick me up (I damn well knew my mom was there) and I had to wait until they showed up.
Finally they said my ride came, put me in the van and took me to the main admin building where I literally just walked up and through the front doors. I remember looking around like, really, I'm just allowed to walk right out?
Idk how to explain it, just a crazy thought to process after being locked up for those 2.5 years and being ordered to do everything and then suddenly, just go ahead, walk right out.
Got out, walked right up to my mom's car (she had been there waiting since 7 am, screw you COs for that last ploy), gave her one of the more emotional hugs of my life and then got in the car and she drove me out of there.
This October will be 8 years since my release. Not a day goes by that I don't think about it in some way.
Halfway
I did a year in rehab and met a guy who did 25 years in prison for murder. I asked him a lot about what it was like inside and getting out and what it was like now that he was out.
He said he felt scared when he was getting out and kind of sad, because of all the people he was leaving. He'd been in that specific prison for over 8 years and knew almost everyone and had some close friendships that he missed. He felt lonely after he left and was actually glad that his halfway house was a live-in, year long rehab, if felt familiar to him. He did have a lot of trouble getting work though.
Unclear Futures
I asked my friend this since we are sitting at a diner. He said, you get excited and depressed at the same time. Excited for the freedom, depressed because you will have a hard time getting a job. He had been sentenced for 18 serving just shy of 13. He's doing well for himself and works on hot water heaters for a living.
Long Flights
Paraphrased from an old friend of mine: Excited but also scared and anxious. Partly because he was convinced that somehow they'd reverse his parole, partly because he was terrified he wouldn't be able to readjust. Was also afraid his relationships with his kids wouldn't be able to recover. Overall until he actually got out, he was more stressed than excited. But the last few hours, when he realized he was actually getting out, he said those were the longest hours of his life. Simultaneously happy but also thinking "OK they decided I get to go, why the heck can't I leave already?!" Said it was like taking a plane to go on your dream vacation, but the flight takes forever, there's no movie and you forgot to bring a book.
Fix The System
You should read The Prison Diaries by Jeffery Archer, it' s a real eye opener. Some of the long termers get released gradually back into society, but they struggle to deal with basic things such as using a supermarket -they've had so long where every decision is made for them, making their own decisions suddenly becomes too much to deal with.
Your instincts are to lock bad people up and throw away the key but for many prisoners this is counterproductive and they spend the rest of their lives costing the taxpayer instead of contributing to society.
The prison system is broken.
Dreaming Ain't Livin', Kid
I did 5 years. By that time I made it to a minimum security prison. That means a jail with no walls and no locks. You could easily escape if you wanted but you would just be an idiot too. The days dragged on slow. I couldn't sleep for the last few weeks. I was anxious and nervous. I had plans to have all types of sex and eat all types of food but none of my plans panned out the way I imagined they would.
Staying Out
I was stoked. You know that sense of euphoria you got on Christmas morning as a kid? It's like that, but it lasts a good year after you get out too.
Then life sets in and you realize it's hard to do anything as a convict. Most people just go back to prison, I managed to land a good job in the oil field and stay free.
I had all my tattoos removed, made sure nobody I used to know knew my number or where I was, then basically just hit the restart button. Most of the people you meet in prison are toxic, gotta disassociate with them and it makes things much easier.
Independence
I did 11 months, was a year but got out a little early. A lot of guys told me there was a lot of anxiety and the weirdest thing was being able to wake up, leave their house and go to bed at whatever time. Being so dependent on the government for so long and then just being released all of a sudden to take care of your own was a lot even for a lot of adults. Most of them being introduced to probation/parole so there are added hoops to your life as far as getting a job and doing everyday things.
When I was released I had a lot of things lined up for me like going back to school and had a good place to live, so when I got out I was ready to be out. The days leading up were very long days just watching the clock knowing you're finally going to be out in the real world. I was really nervous knowing I could have not gotten out on that day, but lucky for me I was and have got back into school since.
Getting Around To More Life
My husband is in prison and thinking about his transition home is always kind of nerve wracking.
He is going to need so much. A car, a job, clothes, personal items, a phone, etc. So now that he is halfway through his sentence we have started talking about saving, and he's begun to save money from his paychecks.
We also won't be living together right away because we have never lived together outside of prison, and we have to ease into being around each other for more than 9 hours a week.
He's really looking forward to getting out but I see him interact with all of his buddies and I know leaving them will be hard for him.
He is lucky enough to have a job lined up when he gets out but u can't imagine how hard it would be for someone who doesn't. 15 years on the inside doesn't look so good on a resume.
County Without Sun
I did 14 months in a county jail. The days were long. I played a lot of cards, chess and I made everyone laugh (including the co's) Honestly, jail saved my life.
The days leading to processing out was weird to say the least. I hadn't seen the sun in soooo long. The weirdest thing was using silverware. I went to eat at a Denny's that morning and my eggs tasted like metal. I didn't know what the fuck and then it dawned on me. I've only been using plastic utensils.
A New World
You go in as a person people around you know. after doing a stretch, even if you keep in contact when you get out your whole family is strangers. There has been births, deaths, divorces, etc. You don't know these people anymore. Wondering what family life will be like was a thought on my mind.
I honestly can't remember much about the days leading up to release, I do remember the bus ride back home though. I've never felt that unreasonably happy. i was smiling like an idiot the entire ride, which was substantial. It was a surreal experience. I still feel the buzz of freedom years later after shit tons of probation and rehab. sometimes I'm in a grocery store and it feels crazy to be completely free and anonymous.
A Careless Life
I came out completely different socially. I used to love crowds, people, festivals, outside concerts, etc. I came out afraid of those things. My crime was non-sexual, non-violent. I would stay at home in complete silence for days. I had never gotten into any trouble before or since. And I've never been the same.
People don't understand prison in America. They think they do, but they don't. They really think there's all this education, good food, and heath care...But prisoners can't complain. There isn't ANY of that. Not in a real sense. Like you would recognize it. Rehabilitation? Thats a joke. No really...like it's a joke, the running joke with the people who work there. They just want you to shut up, stop bothering them, so they can finish their blah blah story. Oh, there's someone having a heart attack? We'll call the infirmary as soon as the game is over.
Paranoia
4 years. It was surreal & scary. It didn't feel real the few days before getting out, when I found out my release was coming a few months earlier than I'd originally thought. I thought it was all a mistake. I felt so used to being there I thought they'd tell me it was a mixup & I must stay.
Even the next few months at home I thought they'd arrest me & say it was a mistake & I must return to prison. I was overwhelmed & scared to go in public, out with friends, etc. I always thought something would happen to make me go back.
All the choices in stores freaked me out after having so little choice for so long. I remember standing in a lotion aisle for 30 minutes wondering if I needed lotion for dry skin, aloe, extra moisture, scented, etc. I gave my list to my uncle & asked him to get my things while I sat in the car.
The last few days in prison though were just surreal. I was excited, but cautious about getting my hopes up even though it was a sure thing. You're expected to give all your things away. I did but again was scared I'd have to stay & my stuff would be gone. I was very institutionalized.
Andy Dufresne Moments
I think The Shashank Redemption represents it very well.
After so many years in prison you become institutionalized. It's like being born again but without adults to guide you, protect you and take care of you . You're on your own, you have responsibilities and the world doesn't help you. Get busy living or get busy dying.
Sometimes you only need to experience something once, to know it's a never again situation.
I always say, try everything once.
Well, now that I'm older, a caveat to that is... try it all within reason.
How many things have we all walked away from saying the one time experience will suffice?
In fact, knowing when to say no is one of life's wisest choices.
Redditor Croakied wanted to discuss the times we've all said... "once was enough!" They asked:
"What is one thing that you will NEVER do again?"
Love. Did it. A few times. Moving on.
Stay Still
"Jump off a moving train."
DenseDriver6477
"My dad used to jump on a train when he was little to go to school. He broke his nose like twice doing it. He also would not recommend."
Darphon
“vaportini”
"Smoke alcohol. Me and my friends bought something called a 'vaportini' in college where you could pour alcohol into a bulb and after low heat separated the alcohol from the liquid, you could inhale it thru the glass straw you inserted into the bulb. Basically you got drunk directly into your bloodstream/brain and it never hit your stomach."
"If you did too much, your body wouldn’t make you vomit or something, there wouldn’t be a simple self regulation/safety measure. You’d just get alcohol poisoning. Felt very dangerous, the drunk wasn’t a regular drunk feeling. We used it once and were like okay, never again. I’d be surprised if you could still buy it, although it would be incredibly easy to replicate at home."
michelangelho
It’s heartbreaking...
"Fall in love with a drug addict."
Rains_Lee
"Good call, don’t do it. The drugs will always come first. Can’t go out unless their 'ok' with how much drugs they have and money left over if any, cant make love unless they have their fix for the night and even still it never feels normal, can’t trust them after the lies to get drugs and the manipulation they put you through, and you can’t change them no matter how much you try and wish they would. It’s heartbreaking."
Cvilla411
More me time...
"Give up my life for work. F**k going the extra mile for a place that doesn't value you and pays you crap even though you go the extra mile for them. You have 1 life with only so much precious time to enjoy it and slaving away at some job is not worth it. Do what you can to reduce your workload and find better employment, or hell try to change the working conditions at your current job to improve things for everyone if you can."
Mrhappytrigers
Well Obvi...
"Donate a kidney."
ToffieMonster
"Well, you could donate the remaining one. You just won’t be around to say anything about it."
shavemejesus
This is definitely list I can relate to. No thank you on a lot of this!
I Quit
"Smoke cigarettes, it's been two years since I quit."
SuvenPan
Forget It
"Climb mount Kilimanjaro. Toughest thing I've done and it's not worth it. I'm all about tough treks and camping but to put yourself under tough conditions and suspectable to altitude sickness only to get to the top for 10 minutes for a picture. No thank you."
Monks_
"I agree, it was memorable. Once was enough for my husband and I. Thankfully we stayed at American style hotel run by the US Navy with a hot tub and bar. Alcohol was definitely needed after all that."
Whatsherface112
I'm living alone!
"Sign a lease with a stranger without hanging out with them a few times beforehand. My past roommate experiences in college were terrible. Roommates either ignored me, hosted parties til 3 AM on weeknights, made the house the hangout and drug-den for them and their buddies. Meet up once and they'll put on an act for you. If you can, try to see how they act drunk or frustrated."
"Try to hang out with their buddies too so you can see the type of people who could be coming into your future place of residence. As soon as I can afford it, I'm living alone! Now, I investigate a potential roommate's social media and hang out at least twice before signing a lease with them."
fleursdefer
Stay Away
"Take back a cheater. Know your worth my brothers and sisters."
santichrist
"Ughhhhh going back and forth on this one. My boyfriend of 5 years has cheated on me. Several times, actually but says he’s really changed and is ready to settle down and wants me to move in with him. I’m on the fence. So they never change???"
madlecroy
Sleeptime
"Take a laxative and sleeping pill at the same time."
karmaredemption
Once, twice, three times... I'm out. Bye.
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People Imagine How They'd React If Their Significant Other Wanted To Sleep With Other People
There is an age old question that has been getting more traction surrounding sex for partners the last decade or so.
And that is... "is just one enough?"
Were we really meant to only be with one person forever?
There are so many flavors to taste.
What if your partner wants more cookie dough with your strawberry?
Redditor Pineapple-Status wanted to hear everyone's thoughts on opening the bedroom to others. They asked:
"What would you do if your long term SO suddenly wants to have sex with other people?"
I say I'd be ok with it, but I'm remembering my last relationship and I feel like I'm not a "put my $ where my mouth is type" on this issue.
Bye
"Wish her well and spend the next 2 years getting myself back to a place where I am ready to get hurt again."
wickedblight
It's Time to Roll On...
"Personally I would leave them."
"I think they're the ones leaving you. I don't think the relationship changes at that point; I think it ends. If you have a monogamous relationship, they are telling you they want to end that. They might be suggesting starting a new, non-monogamous relationship, but that is a separate thing. The original relationship is over."
octopoddle
ethical non-monogamy...
"OP, it's no different than anything else they want: you either agree and stay together, disagree but stay together, disagree and break up, or even agree and break up. What you're talking about is called 'ethical non-monogamy.'" The seminal book to read is called The Ethical Sl*t."
"It basically boils down to be whatever you want, just don't lie about it. The tricky thing is that this is something that was not present before, but is present now. So it's a potential fork in your road. If you're against it, it's up to your SO to decide if sex with other people is more important to them than a life with you."
Tokugawa
a different story...
"I think it depends too how intently they're interested. If it's a thing they bring up because they're curious but it's not a dealbreaker for them, I'm fine with that even if I don't want to proceed. A solid relationship involves open communication, and it'd make me happy if my partner trusted us and our bond enough to voice that curiosity with me."
"If it's something their heart's absolutely set on, then it's a different story. Either way, it's kind of strange to me how these posts always assume simply asking your partner how they feel about opening the relationship means they're now wholey invested in the poly lifestyle and they'll resent you or cheat if you say no."
donkeynique
Others
"Happy that we have common interest, sad that it's different 'other people."
i_lick_icicles
Sex is always an issue. Remember when it was just fun?
Mine
"Leave her. I’m far too possessive and jealous to be able to mentally accept polyamory. If she has a desire to be with other people I’m not going to stand in her way but I’m not going to be there when she gets home either."
Thiek
Not Me...
"Break up. My parents were poly and it's just not for me. I've been honest with every relationship I've been in that I'm not interested in any type of open relationship. If they want to be with someone else that's fine but we'll be over. My husband is aware of this and on board (and has been for over twenty years!). So if he came to me with this yes I would be heartbroken but I'm not willing to budge on this and it would be the end of our relationship."
GoldDustWitchQueen
Let's Talk
"Counseling time! We're married. I'm chronically ill (stage 4 breast cancer) and have no libido. We try to make intimacy work, and obviously in that case it wouldn't be working. So. Time for a pro to sort out the marriage, and possibly a sex therapist for me."
insertcaffeine
Awkward Positions
"I’ll put myself hypothetically in this position. My partner and I only want each other. We’ve made this abundantly clear to each other. However, if she came to me with desire to open our bedroom and she wanted to sleep with people outside our marriage."
"I would simply express how I vehemently do not an open bedroom and that it would kill any desire I have to want her, be with her, love her, etc. Our couple dynamic has been working well through our ups and downs. Involving some stranger in the ONE thing I find most sacred with my partner is the best way for me to lose any interest or passion for the relationship."
RedFlaim
Farewell
"Break it off, because they definitely already have someone in mind and you telling them no won't change the fact that they were only one step away from following through with it."
Caressticles
Well it feels like a lot of people still believe in one partner, happily ever after. Good for y'all. But big props to these couples who have open and honest conversations about their wants and needs.
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Many of us sometimes fantasize about what we would do to our worst enemies, especially in the moments when they're actively making our lives worse.
While most of us would never actually do any of the things that we contemplate instead of screaming at that super annoying person at the office, we do get pretty creative with the ideas.
Redditor take_me_there_ asked:
"What WOULD you wish on your worst enemy?"
This One Would Hurt
"A conscience. Let her realize the horrific things she’s done."
- Jenny010137
"Seriously. Introspection, self awareness, and empathy are traits that would improve a lot of sh*tty people."
- el_muerte17
"Oh I wish I had thought of this one. If my enemy had a conscience, wow life would be much different."
- Shelbysouth43
No Pearly Whites For You
"I’d like all their teeth to turn really yellow and stay yellow no matter what they do."
- toothfixingfiend
"What did I ever do to you?"
- Spideredd
"I don't even know you! Give me back my enamel!"
- AngryMustache9
Everything You Own Is Orange Now
"Permanent Cheeto fingers. Just orange cheese dust getting on everything."
- cocoapuff1721
"This has to be one of the most evil things I ever heard, yet absolutely hilarious."
-Merk0411
"The Midas Touch: Snack Edition"
- MaryVenetia
Ouch, But Forever
"Stubbing and breaking their toe and right as it’s about to be done healing it happens again over and over for the rest of their pitiful time on this hell we call earth."
- No-Bee-2971
"Sisyphoot"
- Alpha_6
"More of a Toemetheus imo"
- PykeTheDrowned
Self Reflection
"For them to realize how big of an a-hole they are."
- mayhemanaged
"Same for me. The trouble is mine probably knows what a tremendous a-hole he is, and just doesn't care (it's what defines him, is his outlook more than likely), so, give mine a conscience as well, he undeniably lacks one."
- RhoadsOfRock
"a crushing moment of self realization is something that can destroy you mentally. I wish that on them."
- chancetodream
Bury Them Under A Mountain Of Minor Inconveniences
"Always being hungry two hours after eating no matter how large the meal. Slow internet. Traffic jams no matter the location. Self doubt. Allergies. Favorite shows spoiled."
"Nothing major enough to be life altering but constant, low grade inconveniences that wear on your soul every day."
- I_Love_Small_Br**sts
"Every bite of food they eat/drink they drink being slightly the wrong temperature."
"Coffee? Warm but not hot. Cola? Cool, but not cold. Muffin? Ever so slightly frozen."
"Not enough to ruin their life, but just enough to not quite have full enjoyment of anything.."
- HappiHappiHappi
They'll Never Be Able To Use Their Computer Again
"Quick scan with McAfee on their computer."
- halflife_3
"You f**king monster."
- Orion_2kTC
"The constant pop-ups from McAfee is too far."
- _Land_Rover_Series_3
That's A New Level Of Evil
"Bed bugs."
- thrawn1825
"Currently dealing with bed bugs, and I can absolutely confirm this is the kind of thing I would wish upon my worst enemy. It is miserable and painful, and I've tried everything to get rid of them at this point."
"I would easily wish this upon my worst enemy, x10."
- ArbitrarilyStagnant
"Oh hell no, you went there... Hopefully they aren't living in an apartment complex or you've cursed everyone in the building."
- expect_less
Well of course I know him. He’s me.
"$100,000. I sure could use it."
- Sparklesperson
"'It’s no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy'"
- FishyVonFishenHymer
"Lol I thought this was that deep sh*t like 'pray for those you resent to have all the things you want in life….' Then I realized."
- No-Chipmunk9527
Forever Constipated
"That they can never have a satisfying poop. They always feel like they have to go to the bathroom and when they do nothing comes."
- [User Deleted]
"Wow. That's evil. Always feeling the need to pee would be good (as in horrific) too."
- ipakookapi
We definitely don't recommend implementing any of these plans (not that most would actually be possible), but here's some new ideas for the next time you're stuck in a meeting with your most annoying coworker and need a little fantastical escape.
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I grew up poor, and I remember the little things that made me smile when we just happened to have enough that week.
The little things that a truly rich person would not think twice about.
Ah, the luxury of it.
What spells luxury for you?
Redditor ConAir161057 wanted to compare notes about the things in life that feel like items only money can buy. They asked:
"For people who grew up with little money, what always felt like a luxury?"
New clothes. I had so many hand me downs and thrift store clothes... new seemed like a dream.
Anxiety
"After growing up in a home where every unexpected problem was a financial emergency, my idea of wealthy became 'I just want enough money that if something breaks I don't get anxiety about how to deal with it.'"
Obiwan_ca_bl**me
Literature
"Getting to buy something from the scholastic book fair."
Rich*itch3232
"My school, at the end of it a bunch of books were 'donated' and then spread out on a table in the library. We all got to go pick one book. So even if kids didn’t get to purchase a book, in the end they had a chance to still get a book. It’s actually how I got my first Harry Potter book. Was a cool idea for any school staff or parents active in their kids’ schools."
glass_pillow
Christmas
"Getting new clothes at Christmas from relatives. I don't know if that is exactly a luxury or the kind of answer you are looking for, but we never had a lot of money when I was in middle school. I went an entire year wearing the same pants everyday. The funny thing was my parents didn't even buy them for me."
"I got them for Christmas from my Grandparents. All the kids use to give me so much sh*t for wearing the same pants everyday. I always told them that I had 5 of the same pair which made me feel good inside and kind of made them ease off even though I know they didn't believe me."
"I remember I fell on the school bus one day and the jagged floor cut a hole right in the knee cap and the panic that went over me was just insane. It was one of the worst feelings of my whole life because I knew that I didn't have any other pants to wear and that now all of the kids in my school were going to know that I only had 1 pair. Needless to say I could not wait for the last month of school to end."
themagicman_1231
I'm Away
"Summer camp, or basically any school trips that had to be paid for. At my school the kids who couldn't afford to go on trips that happened during school hours still had to come to the school, we just sat in a room and did extra work like it was detention."
Helpful_Yams
"I was lucky. If you taught at the day camp your kid could go for free. That was just day camp though not sleepaway camp. My mom found a camp teacher who had no kids of his own and he signed me up as his kid so I could get free day camp. Did that all through elementary school."
randtcouple
Big Deals
"Going out for pizza was a big deal. Those free mini pizzas for reading books were huge."
Shroom4Yoshi
Food is always an issue when you're broke.
Damage
"Being able to turn on the heat in the cold and pay a professional to fix damaged appliances, plumbing, and other issues."
Liggettef
Spoiled
"When my grandma would come pick me up and spoil me. My parents didn't have much money and were addicts so when my grandma would come get me I would come back with new clothes, video games, toys, etc. I used to think my grandma was rich but she actually just had a stable income."
nawlepen
"I was in this position when I was younger. I always thought my grandma had SO much money… but all she did was go to work everyday. Always made sure I had clothes and all my school supplies. I miss her pretty bad."
Keywork29
Water
"I am from a small island in the Pacific. While I mostly still take cold showers, I have always felt that a hot shower is the finest luxury one can experience. I had my first hot shower when I was 22 years old and I can never forget it."
FSMPIO
"This is the kind of luxury I think people take for granted, I always avoided showers in the winter as a kid since most of the time they where cold showers and the temperature here was around 12c° during those times."
PowerfullDio
Showerware
"Towels. Honestly, I was almost 10 When I realized people didn’t just put back on their dirty clothes after a shower because my family was so large (12 kids total including myself) and extremely poor. I thought towels were just for hotels or were maybe a prop on television. I went to a friends house and she asked for my help folding her towels. I remember laughing and thinking she must be rich."
"Long story short, I wasn’t sure which way to fold the towels, and begged my mom to buy them after I revealed that my friend, Simone, had them. She bought a box of used ones from a local auction and I walked around with them on my head feeling like a frigging empress after that, even though—-let’s be clear… these were second hand towels!"
shakezula1025
Or BK...
"Grew up poor and when I was a kid I used to think you were rich if you had a dishwasher and a millionaire if you had one of those refrigerators that have a button for ice. McDonalds was also a luxury, a couple times a year on our birthdays."
chinderellab*tch
Everyone should have access to all of these things. Why is life unfair?
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