Once we're gone we're left to trust our bodies with those we leave behind. Sometimes they know exactly what to do and other times.... they straight up crazy! That is why we must be clear and concise with our remains once we breathe our last breath. The last thing you want is to be used as a doorstop or woven into a blanket... unless you do. It may feel morbid to discuss but it's vital for eternal peace.
Redditor u/Pec4nPies wanted to let everyone know how we should all proceed after the lat breath by asking.... When you die, how would you like your remains to be handled?
Flames.
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Viking burial. I want my body to be shot with a flaming arrow while it's floating down a river. namdog
Because it's the happiest place?
I want to be scattered at Disneyland Florida.
I don't want to be cremated first though. pmdymond
I'll get the wood chipper fired up. Also, it will be $60,000 for this type of ceremony. Stickystickyfingers
Body Chills.
I want my body put in a cryo-chamber and shot into space. Hopefully maybe a few million years later I get discovered by a intelligent life form and brought back to live in a new time.
Or just explode into pieces when hit by space debris. Either way it's pretty cool. fuzzygonemad
I like this one. Sorta like the cliche of finding a caveman trapped in ice and then when it melts he escapes. Except this time in space. Blazze93
Back to the Earth.....
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Natural burial. Wrap me in linen, put me in the ground. Let me go back to the earth. Cremation uses a lot of energy, emits a lot of co2. Traditional burial uses a lot of resources, plus all the nutrients of your body are locked in a coffin instead of contributing back to the earth that those nutrients came from. Haploid-life
Stand Tall.
I want to be a tree. KorvAfBajs
We sort of did that with my dad. We couldn't decide on what kind of tree to get so we just buried his cremains under a pine tree he helped us plant back in 1990 in our back yard. We placed a plaque and we are all very pleased with the decision. jibberish13
See you in a few weeks...
Takes a lot of energy for cremating. I'd rather be composted, like they do for large roadkill. Dump into fresh compost, leave for six weeks, break up the bones a bit, give it another few weeks, throw me in a garden. TemporaryBoyfriend
Find me.
I want the bottom half of me cremated, so I can still have an open casket funeral and have my ashes spread as well.
Speaking of my funeral, there will be an epic scavenger hunt leading to its location. The first to arrive get to call dibs on something from my estate, so find it fast for the best stuff, like my 158 sweater collection or my Nazi German shepherd puppet from the TV show Danger 5. Once everyone is there, the celebration kicks off because my funeral is going to be a party with lots of booze, good food, and live music. -eDgAR-
regardless.... I'm dead so I wont know any different.....
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Neil Degrasse Tyson made a good point on a podcast; basically, when you get cremated all of your energy is wasted by burning, but when you are in the ground your energy gets utilized by the earth (bugs, bacteria, etc.). Long winded way of saying, burial in the ground; regardless I'm dead so I wont know any different. Vitruvian_man21
Husband's idea.
- Donate organs.
- Give me to science if they could use me.
- Bury whatever is left in a plain wood box in a pretty cemetery.
- Plant catnip all over the plot.*
- Have cat friends even in death.
*Husband's idea, because he knows how much I love fuzzy animals. zerhanna
Let Them eat Cake.
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My friend can sell my organs on the black market then use the money to buy cake or something. Fandom_Soup
I Will get You.
Bury me? Fine
Cremate me? Fine
Throw me in the woods and let the animals eat me? Fine
Drop me in a dumpster behind McDonald's? Fine
Get played with by the mortician? Fine
But if you think you are gonna put me in an urn and keep my ashes on the mantel I will haunt you and ruin your life. PM_Me_UrRightNipple
Zapp....
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I always hoped to be vaporized where I stand... none of that undignified corpse business for me. DeathisLaughing
So on the mantle she is.
My grandma just passed in December. She wanted her ashes spread in the ocean. She told this to everyone for years, even in her dying days.
My mom refuses to do it. "I'm not putting her in the ocean with all the plastic and fish!" No one seems to argue with her on it.
So on the mantle she is. I intend to spread her in the ocean one day. BetterLifeNW
Tombed.
I'd like to be mummified and cursed so that I might later rise and spread some sweet plagues. Rockmente
I'll do it for 300$ Cleopatra starter pack, get the anubis 2000$+ to have your own mini pyramid and 500$+ for each family member you want buried (If they're alive it costs extra), and only for this month pay 15,000$ for the Osiris plan and I'll get your corpse to the giza pyramid and enter the tomb to bury you behind some stone.
Find more information in: Pharaoh'sDeath.com. HeartVoid
Shake It Off!
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My sister wants us, when she dies, to cremate her body and put her ashes into a snow globe and shake it every hour or else she'll come haunt our butts. ShadowJDarkus
he was a heck of a dude......
"When I'm dead just throw me in the trash." _TrippieRedd_
My dad used to say two things, "dig a post hole and throw me in head first so the world can kiss my butt "or " cremate me and throw me in the well so I'll stay cool in hell" he was a heck of a dude. NippleSalsa
Going to School.
My Dad would say the some things before he died a few days ago. We didn't know what to do so my older brother interpreted his wishes as wanting to be useful in the afterlife. We signed paperwork to donate his body to a medical school. We figured it's better that students learn hard lessons on the dead before treating the living. The school promised to send his cremated remains in an urn afterwards. lk05321
Oh Canada.
I want to be buried in the deepest part of the largest Canadian forest. For a gravestone I want it to be two wooden boards in a cross shape with my name scrawled across it, then on one side of the cross I want my favorite jacket hung. Abandandmooso3
Sparkle.
They have a few companies that will cremate you and shoot you off into space and I couldn't imagine a cooler way to go.
My grandfather and I used to shoot off professional-grade fireworks when I was younger. The entire time I knew him he said that when he passed away he wanted his cremated ashes shoved in a firework shell and shot off over are local high school where he spent a lot of his volunteer time at. When he passed away two years ago we did just that. TheClassyPenguin989
$$$$
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As cheaply as possible. I would like to minimize the financial impact of my passing as much as possible. bill_hilly
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
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What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
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Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
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Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
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Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...
The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
