Who can really trust their body? At the end of the day we're all just ticking time-bombs, waiting to go off the moment we hit 30, when our backs suffer something traumatic enough to warrant a complaint every opportunity given. However, there are some aspects of being human that stink a little more than others.
Reddit user, u/anam__cara, wanted to know what should have been caught in the Beta testing phase when they asked:
This...This Feels Like It Should Have Been Caught In Alpha Testing
The breathing hole and the food hole are stupid close.
This Feels Like A Huge Missed OpportunityGiphy
Dunno but I wish my tongue could clean my teeth like a toothbrush does
Their Protection Is Minimal
Probably fingernails, especially toenails.
They are barely useful and if they break in half it is pretty painful
What A Useless Tool
You get used to standing/sitting/laying down a certain way and then just like that you have bad posture and is really difficult to correct after a while
Square Peg Into A Pea Sized Hole
Babies have way too big heads for them mum holes. That's just ridiculous. Why can't we be marsupials or smth and give birth to tiny jellies? At least we'd have an extra pocket, that'd be useful with most women's clothing lacking them
Our Bodies Are Cursed Traps
Narcolepsy. Oh, you have it? Whelp, guess you're tired for the rest of your life. But wait, even if you manage to sleep for say, 14 hours you feel as if you only had 3. Also enjoy those periods of insomnia.
And hey! You'll probably fall over too, risking head, neck and other injuries depending on your surroundings and how you fall.
Your brain also immediately into REM sleep when dozing off, so there is the potential factor of either visual or auditory hallucinations.
Why?? Because brain can't produce enough orexin due to destroying the neurons making it! How fun!
(Also pair it up with PTSD? Guess your life is a constant state of nightmares and panicking over the loss of control of your body because of cataplexy.)
Make Up Your Mind On Your Miracles
The fact that the human body can create an entire human inside it, full organ system and everything, but can't get rid of that one scar I got when I was 12
This Does Seem A Little Unfair
"Keep good posture to prevent back strain and injuries"
makes slouching over feel super f-cking comfortable
Let's Put The Rat Poison Next To The Cereal
Femoral artery being just one giant, super important artery
If your femur breaks, then your femoral artery could be easily severed by the splintering bone and you'll die from internal bleeding
Do We Really Think About Toenails?
i don't know how to call this in english but i'll just say
toenails stuck in flesh
also butt hair, like you can't defecate without it getting evil
You can bite the inside of your cheeks and your tongue.
And once you do, you're resigned to it happening over and over again because it swells.
This One Sucks So Bad It Starts To Come Around
Roll your ankle once and it's never the same
Roll your ankle enough that you get rubber ankles and it stops becoming so much of an issue. Source: soccer player.
Too Much Of A Good Thing
sometimes i choke on water
Sometimes I choke on the air I'm supposed to breathe
That'll Teach You?
Women having to bleed and hurt for about a week every month just because they didn't get pregnant.
What A Useless Body Part
For a body part that needs to endure so much stress, they are also very delicate. It's one of the most commonly injured body parts, and it doesn't seem to heal well without surgical intervention. Tear a meniscus? Probably going to need surgery to get part of it cut out, since most of the meniscus doesn't have a blood supply and can't heal itself.
I'll Keep You Alive, Even If It KILLS You
Anaphylaxis. Your body will choke itself to death in an attempt to protect itself.
Your body will do anything to keep you alive, even if it kills you.
For example, fevers
Your body has an infection, so your body heats itself up to 40 degrees in an attempt to kill the infection but, your body can't survive at 40 degrees
Hello, ALL OF SOCIAL MEDIAGiphy
The brain knowing it's doing wrong but still pushing itself to do it for some dopamine.
Like A Testi-Shield?
Testicles, I understand the reason they're not inside the body but damn, could we not have evolved some type of bollock armour by now?
...we need to send a written complaint to the male design department to design some kind of scrotal ribcage.