One of the best parts about having siblings is the ability to mess with them. Are you even a sibling if you're not playing pranks and messing with their heads?
No. The right answer is no - especially if that sibling is younger and more readily believes your shenanigans.
Reddit user MBTshock asked
Older sibling of Reddit, what is the biggest/best lie you told your siblings?
Some of these are hilarious, some of these may go a bit far for some people's taste, it really depends on how "evil" you're willing to get with the youngsters in your life.
50. Poor Duped Kid
My mother is fluent in Spanish and I told my brother that "puta" means "I love you" in French and he the next day says it to my mom like 10 times and got grounded for a month
49. To Pass The Troll
There is this iconic troll underneath one of the bridges in Seattle. This troll has a Volkswagen beetle in his hand. When my brother was flour or five, he really likes Hot Wheels cars. Well, eight year old me took advantage of that and told him that the troll had stolen the car in his sleep and will never give it back. I don't know if he still believes it.
48. Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo
I managed to convince my sister I could use the remote to zap her into the tv. I would chase her around the house.
I was a jerk and got yelled at a lot for picking on her.
47. Yes, This Is Dad
When we were in middle/high school, my younger brother used to get in trouble at school a lot. Whenever the school called our house to to inform my parents, I would answer the phone and pretend to be my dad.
46. Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi
I had a pretty bad hide-and-seek spot so I told my little brother I was just a hologram of myself and I would lead him to the real me. It got boring after like two minutes, but those two minutes were hilarious.
45. One Usage Only
My sister looks just like our mom. Uncanny, really. I had just read House of the Scorpion, so I told her she was actually a clone that my family had created so our mom could uh, make use of her organs when her kidneys failed (I made up a disease).
44. Belgia? I Hardly Know Her!
Not my sibling. But I once convinced my younger cousin (6 months younger than me. When we were in 8th grade) that Belgian waffles were from the nation of Belgia. He believed it for weeks.
43. When Freckles Attack
I once convinced my sister a freckle on her thumb was poop and she had a full on meltdown running around the house screaming "IT WONT COME OFF!". God my mum killed me.
42. The Slender Man Of Vegetables
When we were little our parents were less than super attentive so it usually fell to me to make sure my little brother ate well. One night he was giving me a REAL hard time, so I told him he better eat his veggies or the 'scary man' was going to get him. I was making it up as I went and I think he suspected as much, because he was still refusing to eat and left the table to go outside and play.
So I went into my closet and got this big black hooded cloak I had from a past Halloween and put it on. I went out the back door and came around the house to the front where he was playing, and hid behind a tree. When he got close enough I stepped into view and said in the scariest voice my little prepubescent girl self could muster, "You didn't eat your vegetables."
I never saw a little boy run inside and shovel peas into his mouth so fast in my life.
41. C'mon And Vogue
I'm the younger sibling, but when I was younger, there was a big thunderstorm outside and I was really scared. So my sister said that when there's lightning, it just means that God is taking pictures of us. And then we started to pose like models on my mom's bed in the middle of night.
40. Yer A Wizard Harry
Not me, but my older brother convinced me (~7 at the time) and my younger brother (~5) he was a wizard.
He told us he went to WizardLand every night (like 2/3am) and he'd come back in the morning and tell us all about it. We both 100% believed him.
We were so shocked, we asked so many questions and begged him to take us with him. But he always said it was just wizards and we couldn't go. He said they had wands and did spells and he went through a portal that appeared in his room deep in the night.
Me and my brother started plotting to catch him in the night. We'd pull all nighters waiting for something to happen and when it didn't, we'd accuse him of being a liar. But he'd say it didn't happen because he knew we were hiding and watching. So again, we believed him.
It's not until many years later did we both realise it was an outrageous lie stemmed from too much Wizard101 playing and a storybook he'd come across about a girl who'd sneak off into a magic portal at night and become a princess (she got caught because she'd always come back and leave bits and bobs lying around from her nightly adventures).
Man, did I feel stupid as hell when we brought it back up a few weeks ago and laughed about how naive we were. Honesty, still one of my most favourite things. He dragged on lies like these constantly and he'd do them over the longest periods of time so we could fully believe him.
39. Ya Limey
Am an only child, but my Child Psychology teacher in high school told us about the time she and her siblings were taking a bath. She convinced her brother to drink lime scented shampoo, saying it was lime Kool Aid.
38. When Lies Save Lives
Me and my brother used to eat dog treats as candy sometimes. At some point I figured I would have more if he didn't eat them, so I told him he would turn in to a dog if you ate too much. He never took any after that
37. Dramatically Under The Sea
I accidentally convinced my sister that the sinking of the Titanic didn't happen. She asked me after she saw the movie if the ship really sank, and I sarcastically said "no, they made it up for more drama." She didn't find out I was lying until she came home from school all upset because kids made fun of her for not knowing that the Titanic was real. She was 13.
36. The Worst Kind Of Bilingual People
A friend of mine's father met her mother while he was stationed in Korea, and made the stupid mistake of going to her brother to ask how to say "I love you" in Korean. Older brother was only to happy to oblige, and rattled off a phrase for him to memorize.
Time came to use it, and he discovered that what the brother had actually taught him was a fairly serious insult in Korean. My friend told me that it translated as "Your mother has no pubic hair".
Another friend of mine, who also served in Korea, was once rattling off the various curses that he'd learned while stationed there.
I always found it a little heartwarming that big brothers are jerks, regardless of nationality. We're all part of the same grand, horrible, human tapestry.
35. Poor Mr. Popper
I convinced my brother that penguins don't exist. I started this lie as a joke as soon as he started to learn about animals. I kept it going for 8 years until he got into an argument with his teacher about it. Going to the zoo in that time was really hard though, we always had to avoid the penguins just so I could keep the lie going.
34. Grounded For Life
This isn't a lie I told, but this is still an awesome thing. When my Sis was young, I taught her all the different swear words and when it's valid to use them. I was good for a while until my sister, 5, said "sh**" and when my parents asked where she heard it, she pointed straight at me. Grounded for a week. I was 8. I heard them all through YouTube.
33. The Worst Cocktail
Was probably 10 lil bro was 5 . Convinced him that I put a curse on him, and he had to drink a special smoothie to get rid of it. I had him drink random stuff I found in the kitchen. Hot sauce, mustard, milk, onions, meat. It was nasty, He ended up throwing up and crying to my mom. Good times lmao.
32. Duck Duck Goose
When I was 5 and my little brother was 3 I tricked my brother into thinking I was two different people who looked the same. I would always have a change of clothes with me (I was a messy kid) and would only do this at my grandmother's house and outside, I would wear 1 shirt as me, leave, and come back and play with him as "Duck" (I was 5 and that's the name I stuck with). I stopped doing it after maybe 4 or 6 months and he started getting sad that his friend Duck moved away. I was a mean older brother.
31. Amusement But For Me
When I was around maybe 7 or 8, I convinced my younger sister that she would be teleported to galaxyland (theme park near where we lived at the time) if she went into an empty garbage can and closed the lid. It was one of those old metal stereotypical garbage cans that was hard for a child to open from the outside, nevermind the inside, so cue little sister screaming and crying to be let out and me trying to convince her that it was gonna happen soon. This carried on for about half an hour until out mom came home and I got yelled at for an hour. Now the thing is, soon after I convinced her that the same theme park was actually just a few streets down from our house. She totally believed me and our parents called the police and had to search for her for a while. I somehow managed to talk my way out of it but I really did not like my sister when I was a kid.
30. Kindness Or Cruelty?
I am 8 years older than my youngest brother. When he wanted to play video games as a small child, I would give him an unplugged controller and play with my plugged in controller under a blanket on my lap. These were single player games.
29. The Tooth Fairy
Convinced my sister that the tooth fairy was real after I placed some money under her pillow the first time she lost her tooth. She seemed sad after losing her tooth that day and I wanted to do something to make her happy. So every time she loses a tooth, we put money under her pillow. She still believes in the tooth fairy and I don't think I want to break the news to her.
28. I Didn't Shoot The Sheriff, Or Break The Bed
I was 10 and I was jumping on my parents bed in general being stupid then I broke one of the bed boards, I got so scared to get in trouble I told my then 5 year old little sister that she should play on our parents bed then told her she broke the bed. So she had to tell our parents that she did it, sis if ur reading this sorry it was me
27. Don't Cry Over Spilled Milk
When me and my brother were pretty young ( I was around 4 or 5 and my brother two years younger than me) I spilled a jug of water that my mum had on the bench of the kitchen. I was afraid of getting in trouble for it (which is pretty ridiculous since it was just spilled water). My mum came into the kitchen and asked who spilt it, my brother said I spilt it and vice versa. Eventually it got to the point where we were both in tears, yelling at each other. At this point my mum is fed up and she sends both of us to our shared room and tells us that we were allowed to come out when someone owned up to doing it.
So I know at this point, I will get in trouble if I own up and I'm not willing to do that. I convince/lie to my younger brother who was around three at the time, so not very smart, that mum won't get him in trouble if he owns up. He then proceeds to own up and gets into big trouble for lying to mum about spilling the water. I can't exactly remember what his punishment was, but I remember feeling pretty guilty about it for the following weeks.
26. Goats Only
Telling my lil bratty sis that I bought her for 1000$ in a secret place in Saudi Arabia at the age of 2 when she was a newborn therefore I am her mom so she must listen to me. She doesn't believe me so it's more like convincing. I am trying to brainwash her but im unsuccessful, at present.
And that the plushie toy lions she sees are real and will eat her. When I was 3/4 and she was 1/2. Well, my sis got terrified then one day, our parents gave us 2 plushies but we had to pick one. There was a goat and lion. My sis chose the goat but I wanted it then she said "You tell me that lion is real!!" (In my language). I screamed and shoved the lion in her face which made her cry then in the end I had to pick the lion.
All lies have some sort of consequences, kids.
25. Played Yourself
I'm big sis. Scared my lil sis at the beach, said narwhals were in the water and would come after her. She believed me. What I wasn't counting on was I believed me too. We were both scared to go in ahha
24. Galleria Of Lies
Me and most of my sibs are adopted, my younger brother was about 3-4 and I told him that he wasn't really adopted but that my mother bought him at the mall. Every single time we went to the mall I would say she was going to return him. He would freak out and not want to go so my mom would drop him at grandma's or at daycare so she didn't have to deal with a crying kid in the mall and I would get to go with my mom. To this day he hates going to the mall but doesn't really know why.
23. To Quell
When my brother was little and my mother went out for groceries my brother used to cry and I couldn't get him to be quiet, so I used to tell him the story of the old man. In the place where I lived there was an old man who was mentally ill. Everyone was scared of him and that were mostly kids. I always said to my brother that if you don't stop crying the old man will hear you and will come to take you away so you'll never see mom again. I feel sorry now but I was also a kid so I didn't thing about his feelings at all. The old man was scary but as long as you didn't talk to him or watch him than he did nothing
22. Aural Prison
I once told my little brother that there's a limit on how much noise you're allowed to make over the course of your life. Once you go over the limit, you have to go into a nursing home, because they're jails for loud people. I also told him that he was very close to his lifetime limit because of how loud he is, and if he doesn't want to be the only four year old in the nursing home, he should only whisper from then on. There was more to it, but that was the gist of it.
21. Value Down
My older brother convinced my younger brother that 2p coins were worth more than £1 coins because they were bigger, so my little bro would swap all his £1 coins with him.
20. Air Displaced
Not the older sibling, but I told my younger cousin that every time he smells someone's fart the air that was in their butt is now in his lungs. And told that same cousin that God was just as real as Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and tooth fairy; and this was before figured out that Santa, tooth fairy, etc didn't exist.
19. Religious Doctrine
I used to tell my sister that Santa only comes to your house if you're Christian and you only go to heaven if you're baptised.
That second one wasn't technically a lie, but she constantly begged our parents to be baptised out of fear of going to hell. We're not even catholic.
18. Ole Kris Kringle
I told my younger brother that I had seen Santa and the Easter Bunny because I was too smart and figured out that they weren't real at the young age of 6, he's also not the brightest so it lasted till he was about 9 because my mum straight up said "Don't tell any of your younger cousins that Santa isn't real because they don't know yet.", I was furious because he didn't know either. I tried really hard to make him believe and my mum did absolutely. Nothing.
17. When It Works Too Well
I scared the crap out of them once by taking them both into their room (they are twins and shared a room at the time) and told them that I'm not actually their brother and rather an assassin/spy sent there to eliminate them if they ever got out of hand or misbehaved. They are 9 now and still slightly believe it even though I told them it was a joke afterwards
16. Nose Strolls
I told my 7yo sister one time that when she went to sleep her boogers would walk out of her nose and go in her hair. She legitimately cried because she was scared so she told our mom and mom had to tell her it was a lie. But let me tell you, the reaction was priceless
15. Regurgitated Food
Not me, but my Dad to his younger brother. He told him that mashed potatoes were mashed by people chewing potatoes up. My uncle has refused to eat mash potatoes since.
14. Snail Sounds
I started telling my little brother that snails said meow and showed him "evidence" videos from SpongeBob. He wasn't too sure at first but my parents found it so hilarious that they joined in and after that he was very convinced for about a year.
13. Holy Nips
Giphy
That Jesus had really big nipples. "Read" it to her from a children's Bible when she was four. She still sings songs about it and insists on it whenever the topic comes up. She's going to a Catholic elementary school soon, wish her luck.
12. A Fake Adoption
I made fake adoption papers and "hid" them in my parents' room. My brother had already been asking if he was adopted since he looks nothing like our parents (he looks more like our grandparents). He's not, but I told him I was too young to remember an adoption. I then let him know that our parents "hide" important papers in X location in their room. He found the fake papers, really freaked out and my parents about killed me.
11. Free Gardening
Animal Crossing on GameCube, I let my brother move in to my village. I told him the main goal of the game is to pick all the weeds. My village looked great.
10. An Organization Of Santas
I had my little brother believing in Santa Claus probably until nearly 9 years old because I told him the actual ruse is that its not a single Santa but an organization of Santas worldwide that operate in unison. I told him that mall Santas were local people who had been deputized, but had every bit the authority and jurisdiction of the Santa org and so if you were bad, mall Santa had every right and capability to ruin your Christmas.
He also asked me about squeezing down chimneys, eating cookies and milk, and reindeer. I told him the reindeer were real back in the 1800's, back when there were a lot less people in America ("like 5000 or so") so reindeer made sense for method of transport. Cookies were basically like gratuity for the gift giving. Nothing is free after all!
The chimney one I always just went somber. "Oh no. That one is real. Very very real." But I wouldn't say more.
9. Birdhands
I told them that birds have mini hands that are hidden on their chest that would hold eggs and enable them to transport it safely.
8. The Terminator Movies
I told my brother that people who die in movies are actors who die in real life for it.
I forgot all about that comment, until months later when my brother commented when watching one of the Terminator movies; "I don't understand these people, why would they die just to get to be in a movie?"
7. The Lion King
Giphy
Growing up I didn't like the Lion King. I was like 5 or 6 at the time. My little sister, however, loved it and would always pick it when it was her turn to choose a movie. I found it way too sad and dreaded watching it. As everyone knows who has seen it, the movie ends the way it begins - with the birth of a lion.
So I would always have it start at the ending sequence. My little sister thought that the Lion King was only 5 min for a long time.
6. The Cool Older Brother
Told my little sister for years as a teenager that I would sneak out every weekend with my friends. It was a straight up lie. I had virtually no friends at the time, and I had snuck out once to a party (only one I ever got invited to) at that point and hadn't done it again. But it felt good to be the cool older brother with a story to tell.
Well, she went and told her neighbor friend that I would do this, and he told his mom who then told my mom. My mom confronted me in front of both of them and I immediately gathered what happened.
Admitting that I lied about it and was lame with no actual friends would have been worse than taking the punishment, so I willingly got grounded for like 6 weeks for something I didn't do just so I still looked cool.
5. Debbie
I convinced my brother he had a uterus and he had to name it. He named it Debbie.
4. To The Moon
My dad had some old Apollo 11 memorabilia and and an actual letter from NASA. They sent him some moon maps, posters, some really cool stuff. Anyway, I showed this to my younger sibling at the time she was probably 6 or 7, and I told her my parents planned on sending her the moon when she gets older and that she better start preparing to leave now.
She didn't believe me, until I showed her the map. That's when she started to panic. And then I showed her the letter, and that's when I realized I took it too far because she started to cry. I still bring it up from time to time.
- Juturna_
3. Brown Eyes
I convinced my younger sister that she was adopted because she has brown eyes. My brother and I have green eyes. She actually believed it from ages 6-15.
She blew up on our Mom one day, because "You NEVER told me I was ADOPTED." Luckily, I wasn't living at home when that came out. In my defense, I seriously thought she would have realized some time over the years that our Mom had brown eyes.
- pyroroze
2. The Bocci Ball Long Con
Oh man, do I have an answer for this! I still bring it up all the time.
I told my younger sister that Bocci Ball is a full contact sport. I told her the rules were that you had 2 teams and point were racked up by carrying the small white ball, the longer your team had the ball the better. The opposing team could get points by knocking the ball out of your hand.
How would they knock it out you ask? Why, by throwing the larger colored balls at you. The opposing team could then grab the white ball and start amassing the points themselves.
Now, if you're not familiar with Bocci ball, the balls are all very VERY hard and playing it this way would easily crush bones.
Anyway, she only kinda believed at first, but I kept to the story any time or reason I could.
Finally, years later, her gym class is going to do a day playing Bocci.
She refuses, apparently making a stink about how she refuses to play because she doesn't want to get hurt and somehow no one seems to ask her why she thinks she'll get hurt. She keeps digging until finally someone tells her the real rules.
Not an earth shattering lie, but it was a good long con and the whole family still get a good laugh out of it.
- McDewbie
1. When Pigs Fly
Giphy
Told my younger sister that pigs are born with wings but the farmers cut them off so they don't fly away. This is where the phrase "when pigs fly" comes from. I completely forgot about this little lie until a couple years later when she came home from elementary school furious because she's talked about the pigs with wings with her science teacher and got schooled.
Oops!
25 years later and she still buys me an occasional flying pig as a joke.
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
Giphy
See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.