Actions speak louder than words, though words can set my temper ablaze just as prudently as an action. Do you all notice that we are all pretty good at keeping our emotions in check with the big issues? Like when someone does us wrong we take a step back (to evaluate and plot revenge) and process our emotional state as to not jump straight to fury. Fury can be counter productive. So why is it the little things that push us to insanity; like killing one another over a meal or a parking spot... makes no sense. Perhaps we're all trapped in a "this is the last straw syndrome?"
Redditor wanted to hear from everyone about the little things in life that can turn us front Jekyll to Hyde in seconds by asking.... What is the smallest thing that makes you lose your temper immediately?
Don't Touch!Â
Giphy
Things not staying where I put then. For example if I hang a towel and it just immediately decides to slide off, or I put my spoon down in my ice cream, but because it's still almost full the spoon just tips over and falls out. Like, you're inanimate f---ing objects, don't just f---ing up and decide to do some random BS that makes me have to go and pick sh!t up or clean the floor! Stegaosaurus
SHUT UP!!!!!
Someone trying to talk to me while I eat at work. Come on, just let me have this 10 minutes to myself. Knoife
Ohhh my god THIS is the stuff that makes me see red. Example:
Me: finally sits down for lunch after being on my feet for 4 straight hours, just wanting to be left alone so I can eat in peace and silence
Coworker (every F**KING time without fail): "Whatcha eating?" comes over and peers at my lunch, then decides to start this WHOLE a** one sided conversation about her cooking/her kid's eating habits/her opinions on whatever I'm eating/etc and bothers me for my entire lunch break
Me, thinking: :) Ah yes. This is exactly how I envisioned my one singular 10 minute break going. Awesome! girlquartz
I need GREEN!Â
Hitting back to back red lights. wonderwine
Best is when they turn red in front of you to maximize the delay. Then there is the red light to let one car through. _AlreadyTaken_
Supermarket Rage!Â
Grocery store etiquette. GTFO of the middle of the aisle! This can't be your first time shopping! theoretic_lee
Or people that just bust out of the aisle with their carts into main paths without stopping/looking. Do you merge onto roads without yielding while you drive too? FrankDaTank787
Lord give me Strength!
Giphy
When a car pulls out right in front of me and then goes 20 mph under the speed limit anyway. why?????? just wait then. cherrypie3
Do not drive in Arizona. Probably Florida too.
It actually annoys me less these days because every single time the person is 70+ and probably actually didn't see me coming when they made a right on red and immediately moved over three lanes to go very slowly in front of me. I just go around them and practice O-ming. ms_eleventy
STOP LAUGHING!Â
Bumping my head on something when I stand up. It takes me by surprise and pisses me off. dignified_fish
Ohhhh makes me so mad!!!! And if my mother is around, she will immediately make fun of me and laugh. Even. More. Rage. sbllke
Always wait 8 Seconds!Â
This morning, I got a bag of popcorn out of the vending machine at work. Opened it too fast and shot popcorn all over the floor. For a good 7 seconds, I thought about just going home and quitting my job from bed. JeffMatthews410
I'm the same way except it's more like "wow how mildly inconvenient, what if I just end my life right now in the break room?" then I laugh about it and go on my merry way lol. njm_nick
How would I know this?
When someone can't grasp that something isn't as obvious to me as it is to them, simply because I can't read their minds, I don't know their whole life story, or I don't have the same educational background, or the same interests. Marawal
I dare you to push again....
Giphy
When standing in line at a store and the person behind you is ramming into you with their shopping cart or standing waaaaay too close. Seriously, personal space, you pushing me wont make the line go any faster. username-done
You hear me!Â
I always say loud towards them "Are you gonna pay for my stuff?" Cashiers always laugh at that dumb people. Almost every time person turning all-red and is going back pushing other "hurry" people creating a slow-motion mosh pit behind. "Almost every time" because once a grown man (40-50yo) pretend he did not hear me, and turn his face away from me to cashier. Cashier backed me up and repeat question, and that man starts slowly stepping back while his face quickly becomes red. skyfireee
Sandwich Rage.
When I bite into a delicious sandwich and all the insides fall out of the other end. I call this Sandwich Rage. yakshack
I get so mad at this, especially if I'm super hungry. It's like the sandwich is procrastinating on being eaten. Aegis12314
Don't Give IN!
Giphy
When an adult throws a tantrum to get what they want and succeed.
For example, when someone tries to return something without a receipt and the manager says they can't accept their return, so the person starts making a scene and the manager gives in.
Nothing pisses me off more than people getting away with stuff when they know they're in the wrong. velour_manure
0 to 100!Â
If someone shushes me or puts their hand in my face. I go from 0 to 100 in no time. SpikedBubbles
I have friends who say pause as in "wait, what" but never as a way to shush me. That's f**ked. NewfounderTC
Phones Off!
People using their brightest screens on their phones to check texts and social media during movies in a theater. Analytica0
People checking social media during a movie drives me insane. It's two hours of your life. Just sit there and watch the goddamned screen. If you can't do that, stop going to movies. gizmodriver
SILENCE!!!
When someone's talking and trying to give instructions, but everyone else is just talking among themselves. Maybe it's a hold out from my military days, but nothing makes me flip faster than this. I was constantly on a hair-trigger when I left the military to pursue a degree because of the sheer disrespect some kids show to the professors. pan0ply
Mouth Shut!Â
When someone chews loudly beside me, especially if they chew with their mouth open. CleverNameAndNumbers
Or slurp. That just annoys the hell out of me. iknowthisischeesy
Don't Steamroll...
Giphy
Talking over me. I get that it's a cultural thing for some people - in some families you never get heard at all unless you talk over your family members - but doing it in regular conversation is just enraging.
Also condescension. Call me "son" or "honey" one more time, a**hole. FuzzyElf47
Oh Betsy....
A lady in our office would leave the bathroom with the roll of toilet paper hanging down into the garbage can. We moved the garbage can and mentioned it to her many times. Now, the toilet paper goes all the way to the floor. Last time I brought it up all she replied with was "You don't have kids yet so you are going to have to learn for that to not bother you." Yeah I don't have kids but just because you do, it doesn't give you an excuse to act like a kid here at work, Betsy. LightHouseMaster
Damn keys...
When I throw my keys on the table and the slide off then I try again and they slide off again and I just say screw it and leave them on the floor. adamrocks84
Get out of my Way!Â
People taking up the sidewalk and walking too slow. Immediate rage. thoawaydatrash
Similar but driving, someone wanting to see what lane is going to go faster so they sit in both, so no one can pass them.
Bigger frustration when they're the only car blocking you from getting to that light that you're trying to turn right on.
Biggest frustration is when you're trying to get to that light to turn right, and they think you're trying to cut traffic, so they block both lanes. notdazzer
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The dogs owner shared the video along with a post asking professionals to shed some light on why he does what he does.
Owner-obliviousness as they gushed about how adorable it was made the awkward even better.
The owner explained the Frenchie often makes aggressive eye contact and licks his lips while he "plays air guitar"—which is what the family calls it—and how cute & funny they all find the behavior.
GiphyThe video was the dog, casually chilling, using his paw to rub the tip of his penis while staring awkwardly at the camera and licking his lips like a pup possessed.
Three hundred and fifteen laugh-reacts—at the time that I saw it—and only three comments:
1. a vet explaining that the behavior showed in the video was the dog masturbating while making direct eye contact
2. the owner giving a simple "thank you" and
3. the admins of the group closing the comments.
So, why am I sharing this with you?
Because Reddit user Drakmamman asked:
"Dog owners of reddit, what the dog doin?"
... and so now you get this whole article just so I had an excuse to tell y'all about a furiously fapping Frenchie, 'cause somebody else needed to know about him.
I cackled for a good 20 minutes imagining the family getting all giddy about their dog "playing air guitar"—making the little air guitar meedly squeedly noises while he played, maybe even playing along thinking they're enjoying a fun little game—but they're really just been giving a hair metal soundtrack to their dogs stroke sesh.
Something tells me now the owner knows what "air guitar" really is, they're not likely to rush and tell Reddit all about how they've been gathering as a family to watch cause it's just so cute.
That's what I'm here for.
Anyway, here's the stuff other people's dogs are up to. It's not fapping—or if it is, the owners aren't telling Reddit.
Partner Preference
Giphy"Wife just came home with the baby. Dog is acting like she's been abandoned for years running up and down, barking and jumping on everything."
"They'd only been out an hour and I was with her the whole time." - Single_Goose7015
"My dog does this too when my wife comes home. Like what am I, chopped liver?" - jackof47trades
"I feel your pain. My dog started howling mournfully when my partner went back to work last week… I was right there!" - TreatOutside
"Staring at the door waiting for the only human he cares about to come home (obviously not me)" - SnarkyRedhead
Herding Cats
Giphy"Probably trying to herd the cats."
"He's a border collie mix who's afraid of goats and sheep, but even after six years of living with them he still thinks he can control where the cats go."
"He's a good boy, he's very persistent, but not terribly bright sometimes." - TokesNotHigh
"After 8 years our border collie still herds the cats, and the vacuum." - psychologicaluse28
"Big heart, small brain. I have one of those dogs too. They are the sweetest." - Technobucket
Wretched Existence
Giphy"She has flung herself flat across the bed and is playing dead, quiet except for the occasional pitiful whine. Every now and then she lifts her head up and fixes a desperate look upon me, silently begging for release from her wretched existence."
"She's a bit overdramatic about having to wear a cone. The issue is an abrasion on a toe that she won't stop licking, which is making it worse."
"I've been alternating between bandaging it and having her wear a cone. She's been consistently a drama queen." - halfinboxes
One Hour
Giphy"Staring at me because their dinner time is in one hour and they need to start letting me know that, in an hour, they need to eat...in an hour, so I better not forget...cuz they're hungry, which is why they're staring at me...and it's almost dinner time."
"Just one more hour, And they want to make sure I don't forget. Because maybe I will."
"So, they need to remind me. By staring at me. Every day. One hour before dinner." - MotherOfFred
A Little "Light" Exercise
Giphy"Mine loves light reflected off watches or phones. And loves lasers."
"It's sunny and he sees light on the wall so he is bothering me to use my watch or phone so he can chase the light. I've spent the last hour doing it."
"I even got him a cat laser toy that's automatic for him and he runs himself tired as all hell with it. But he is STILL asking for it."
"Used the laser toy also too, so he is panting dripping tongue and still wants to play more..." - boomgoon
Vicious Predators
Giphy"Last night my dogs chased down and killed a rabbit in the backyard. They are usually so gentle; this was weird and unexpected."
"I watched the whole thing helpless because it was so fast. The rabbit screamed, it was insane."
"Now, I'm watching them sleep on my couch and can't help but think they just murdered someone."
"They are just vicious predators, right here, in my house. On my couch."
"But they snuggly as f*ck. This trips me out." - Atheist_Redditor
A Problematic Princess
Giphy"We have two chihuahuas. One is a 15 year old (quite appropriately) named Princess and one is a one year old named Charlie."
"Both have their own dog beds on the couch since they are spoiled."
"When Princess is feeling particularly moody or like asserting her dominance, she will drag Charlie's bed into her bed and lay on top of BOTH of them and snarl at him if he comes close to her personal space bubble/bed mountain."
"And when we tell her she can't have both beds and put his bed back to the side, she just glares at us. Lol." - mslm90
Shoe-nanigans
Giphy"She's currently in her cage resting after her great adventure."
"She managed to get upstairs and grab a hold of one of my shoes. Not just any old shoe, but one of the shoes I am planning to wear this weekend for my wedding."
"After running around, she dropped the shoe to chew on a shirt - at which point she was cornered, and then brought downstairs."
"Pup and shoe are both unharmed and doing well. My nerves, not so much." - still_interesting23
So ... what's YOUR dog been up to lately?
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