It's safe to say your exes are exes for a reason. Something in your relationship just did not work out, and while it may have hurt at the time, you're better in it for the long run. Though, certainly, if all your past paramours were to gather in one place they might have something to say to you.
Reddit user, u/dRPhantom93, wanted to know what your worst fears are when they asked:
If your exes all gathered in a room, what's one thing they would unanimously agree on?
The Times Have Certainly Changed
"HE'S A DRUNK LAZY F-CKER!"
Then my current Fiancee would look very confused because I've been alcohol free for 4 years and I certainly do not behave how I use to.
Change For The Worse
That they all remember me as being much more happy and full of life than I am now.
Simply Out Of It
They'd most likely agree that I was sweet to them and never violent. They'd also all have similar experiences with me appear to 'check out' of the relationship via playing video games and ignoring them. (it's subconscious and im working on it)
I also villainized all of them when we broke up and cut off all contact because it was easier for me to cope. So, that would probably be mentioned.
The First Step Is Self-Awareness
That I was a fun and sweet boyfriend but have too many issues stemming from my super-religious upbringing to survive in long term relationships.
EDIT: For those asking: Jehovah's Witnesses.
Moderation Is Not In My Dictionary
Pretty sure this would be unanimous.
- He is funny. / He can be inappropriate.
- He is a good cook. / He likes things too spicy.
- He really likes beer. / He likes beer maybe a little too much.
Steer Into Your Beanbag Status
GiphyThat I make a better bed than a boyfriend.
Every single gf I've had has said, unprompted, that I am unbelievably comfortable to lie on
You Might Learn From Them
They'd probably agree that I was a bit too clingy, which is why I've spent the last 4 years single in order to work on myself.
Remember folks, make sure you're stable and happy before entering a relationship - thinking someone else will magically make you happy will not make you happy unless you're with them all the time... hints the clingy part.
All You Can Do Is Apologize
That I am extraordinarily sh-t at break-ups.
Also that I mentally check-out from the relationship when under stress.
And that I am a really good cook.
There Can Be A Positive Spin To It
"She's a wonderful person, just not the right one for me."
All 3 of my ex's, including my husband, either cheated or left me for someone else.
Redditor _ReDd1T_UsEr wanted to discuss the reasons why many of us decided to cut some people out of our lives, so they asked:
"What was the reason why your friendship ended with someone?"
Sometimes a person just has to go.
Planning Stages
Weekend Sunday GIF by DisneyGiphy"I stopped being the first to always initiate plans, and that was that."
Witty-Surround-6541
"I once asked a friend to plan our next breakfast + walk outing, since I always did that. He wrote me a letter ending the friendship. Stunning!"
fermat9996
Pants on Fire
"Habitual lying became too annoying and disruptive to tolerate."
Hosscatticus_Dad523
"When you constantly are thinking... this math ain't matching lol. People that lie all the time make me sick. I've told multiple friends that you don't have to lie to me."
"I feel so much better when someone can trust me and feel comfortable telling me a hard truth than an easy lie."
"Even if the truth made me feel some type of way, I'm still glad it was honest. I've even said thank you to people in the past that have been honest with me, good or bad! Some people just can not help lying about things. I wouldn't be able to ever keep a story straight if I did that."
__eden_
Bad Behavior
"He kept having kids with different girls and bailing on them. Coming from a 'went out for a pack of smokes' Dad myself, I just couldn't watch it anymore. Bailed after the third one. Think he's up to 6 now."
KingGuy420
"Reminds me of one of my ex-friends. She kept having kids with MULTIPLE guys (all of them were one-night stands), I don't think she even knows who the baby daddies are."
"She also kept begging me and people for money for pot, and she also bragged about having OnlyFans. She'd also make up stories about being in an abusive relationship with her boyfriend (she'd also cheat on him/tell people her and him they broke up, which they weren't)."
wisconsinking
Reasons
"I was a bad person and they ended it for perfectly sensible reasons. I would have done the same. I've changed, but I don't blame them for not reconsidering contact."
tabletopsidekick
"I’ve been there. I was a bad person and lost friendships and family relationships. I tried to apologize to everyone I hurt."
PDXGalMeow
"I also accepted that they don’t want me in their lives anymore. I learned that I made my mistakes, I learned from them, and I accept their choices. I don’t self-hate anymore and I try to be a better person in general. I hope you are doing well and practicing self-love and forgiveness."
PDXGalMeow
Money Issues
Donald Duck Money GIFGiphy"I lent them $20 and then they avoided me so they didn’t have to pay me back. Worth the $20."
BuickAssault
"I don't ever expect prompt returns of small amounts of money between my friends... we all buy each other rounds or buy the food for the BBQ or whatever. It ends up evening out over time I think we'd notice though if someone was always taking and never giving and then they'd probably get cut off too."
Badloss
In the immortal words of Cyndi Lauper... "Money Changes Everything."
Lack of Support
Happy Planning GIFGiphy"She joined a pyramid scheme selling butt-ugly leggings and it took over her whole life. When I finally told her it was negatively affecting our friendship, she accused me of not supporting her 'business.'"
LeftandLeaving9006
Oh Driver
"I was basically a taxi for my friends so I dumped them all."
Bullfrog_Little
"This one I can understand but depends on the situation. Not all of my friends had cars in high school, so our group needed to have me and my sh*tty '94 Plymouth Sundance come, or they couldn't do anything. I didn't mind at all then, but I definitely would these days."
Hoopajoops
"I remember I used to drive around with my buddies all the time before they had licenses. When one of my friends got his and a car I said sweet now you can drive me around for a bit, he replied that he wasn't gonna waste his money on gas like that. See ya, haven't really spoken to him since."
DontcallmeShirley_82
2063
"How's this for oddly specific: Friend since 1980, was hanging out at a bar in 1992 and there was a dispute of over a $15.00 bar tab. I was in the right, but whatever - he held a grudge for years."
"Ran into him in 2017 and we were both too old to care. Started to see each other now and then. 2023 and we're at this local bar for a show and got into a fight about $15.00 a ticket."
"Maybe he'll call me in 2063."
The68Guns
Exhausting
"She was a taker, constantly. When I needed something she made it about her yet again. Exhausting to be around."
LordyIHopeThereIsPie
"I'm going through this right now. Can't tell you how many texts I have from her in the past few days telling me that I need to get over myself, need to stop making myself the victim, have been a terrible friend, have never been there for her."
"She's the most narcissistic person I know and everyone does everything for her. She has one of the easiest lives ever and anytime anything bad happens to her she believes that everyone is against her and she's the victim here. It's pure insanity. There is no talking sense to people like this."
cheeseburgerwaffles
Life Changes
point pointing GIF by Shalita GrantGiphy"I've lost like all but two of my 'friends' because I stopped drinking and doing hard drugs."
ConcertTerrible8877
"Same here dude. My circle is small but hey at least it's a circle I know I can go to."
Miss_mayonnaise
Oh, how things change when the booze dries up.
How much fun were you really having?
Do you have any stories about cutting off a friend? Let us know in the comments below.