They say you never know how wealthy you are until you meet someone in the economic bracket right above or below you. When you meet people who make less than you, it can make you grateful for what you have the opportunities you took. When you meet the people above you, it can inspire you to aim higher, achieve more financially, and attain a better life.
Then, when you meet those people two or three economic classes higher, that's when you turn to the internet to talk about them.
Reddit user, u/FixedFrameNate, wanted to hear about:
Wow. Not Starting Off Great...Giphy
When she told me her family was down-to-earth because they only had the housekeeper come once a week.
All The Little Extra Details
If they brought lunch from home, they always had lots of food in their lunch box. Little plastic containers full of fruits, veggies, or a sandwich, as well as a bunch of other things I still think of as special snack foods, like the little cheese wheels, chips, and the brownies with the rainbow sprinkles. If they got lunch from school, they could buy the little extra items as well as their meal if they wanted, and it wouldn't be a big deal.
They'd also have lots of stuff in general. So much clothing it felt like they rarely, if ever, wore the same outfit. Whatever the new tech thing was that year. When we got became enough to drive, they got their own car. Bonus if your parents bought you a brand new car. Also, their parents seemed able to come to the school at the drop of a hat. They might be on PTO, or volunteer for the classroom parties. They got to go on vacations far away too. We're landlocked where I am, so these kids' parents would take them to coastal areas, on cruises, or to other countries. Sometimes they'd even miss school for that.
So Much Poop To Clean Up
Was the early 90s. Tamagachis were the rage. Most kids didn't have one.
This girl walks in with 5.
The Happiest Place On Earth
When they go to Disney world.
Rolling In Them FooDollars
A ridiculous amount of signature Webkinz and a Foo Pets membership.
Seriously, There's Only One Kind Of Person Who Has One Of These
They had a lake house
Children Of The Early 00's, Where You At??
When they were able to use the internet on their flip phone without freaking out cause you accidentally pushed the internet button.
Oh, the panic of the internet button...when you scramble to hit the back button 10 times until you just power off the phone and pray that you did it in time. You'll have to spend another five minutes typing out that text again on the 10 key, but it is worth it to avoid the wrath of the parents when they get the cell bill.
Eh, Tomato, Expensive-Freaking-Car-O
There were different cues for levels of wealth. I thought I was pretty well off as I could ask for and get the big box of Crayola crayons with a sharpener and my shoes were bought new. When I got a scholarship to a prep school, I learned that wealthier families traveled during school breaks.
The most ridiculously wealthy kids got brand new cars for passing their driving test. The cars were replaced once damaged.
Small Signs, Every Day
As a young kid, it was their clothes, lunches, and general appearance. They kind of stood out from us legions of poorer kids at the school. We ate the hot lunch at a reduced or free rate, they brought in neat sandwiches, individual bags of chips, Hi C, and Little Debbie or Hostess desserts.
There was a girl in my elementary school I don't think I ever saw wear the same outfit twice, and they were nice clothes, not hand me downs from Mom, which put our yard sale and home made clothes to shame.
That's Quite The FlexGiphy
This is a really specific example but I was in 5th grade and all the 5th grade classes were competing for a pizza party. The class that "donated" the most money to this glass jar each classroom had would get the pizza party. As an adult I understand how weird and sketchy that sounds having elementary kids donate money to their public school but it's been a couple of decades now and I didn't question it considering how often we had to do fundraising and go sell stuff to neighbors and extended network.
It was the last day and my class was in second place. This one kid asked how far behind we were and the teacher said something like 15 dollars as of the beginning of the day. This kid pulled out his checkbook and wrote a check for 50 dollars to go in the jar just to cover all bases regarding the other class. I mean, for fifty bucks that kid could have just thrown us a pizza party but in 5th grade it seemed pretty cool.
Take A Look At The Make And Model
Walk through the high school parking lot. the kids from money had brand new Ford F-150s or Mercedes, or such, while those of us who didn't were relying on nearly 20 year old Honda CrX's.
A friend used to always use three paper towels to dry his hands after washing them. We never got to use more than half of one.
It's In The Finer Details
We wore school uniforms and had dress codes so you would think it would be hard to tell. For most of these kids who "had money", it shows in the small things like how polished their appearance was. But I couldn't tell for sure unless I know them well.
I guess it was also harder to tell since during my years, that was when the public started to really take digs at the scOOLh I went to due to some bad apples. You didn't really talk about your family wealth unless you want to get singled out. And anyway most kids at the school were upper middle class so no one really "boasted" or "showed off".
Authentic Trapper Keepers Were The Signal
Trapper keepers, Kudos granola bars, kids with produce on their sandwiches or soup in their thermos instead of milk
They had a sega and a nintendo
Travel The World On Her Sister's Dime
Would miss weeks of school because they were always on vacations
There was a girl in my uni class who was the sister of a supermodel, she was barely ever there because she was usually visiting Tokyo or something with her sister. She was nice tho
Guys, Come On! Motel's Are Just Tiny Amusement Parks!
They had fancy vacations or even several vacations each year.
I hated first days of school when the teachers would ask everyone what they did over the summer and you have Paige over there who went to Europe, and Connor who went all around the United States, and the most I did was maybe get FroYo if I was lucky.
Seeing The Differences In Wallet Sizes Every DayGiphy
My friend would give me more money for lunch than my parents.
Holy crap this is so real. My family didn't have too much growing up and I had JUST transferred out of a public school and got a partial scholarship to go to a private middle school/high school. My parents thought lunch prices were going to be the same so I received $5 a week for food. We didn't have money so I never wanted to tell my parents that $5 a week wasn't enough so I just waited until the end of the school day so that I could walk to McDonald's for a $1 mcchicken or McDouble because school lunches were $5 minimum for a mini plate.
I had 2 friends help me throughout my rough financial time in high school. They saw that I would never eat at school and basically fed me without pitying me. One friend would order more than he could eat and would always ask me if I could do him the favor of finishing his food so it doesn't go to waste. The other friend would do things like "hey I'll bet you lunch you can't do this" and it'd be something simple like "you have 3 shots to shoot this paper ball into the trash can" or "race to drink this water bottle first" or even just "I'll buy you lunch if you walk to the cafeteria with me"
I didn't really realize too much when I was younger and I thought they were just rich and were careless with their money. It turns out, they took notice to the fact that I didn't eat at school. They told me in college that they always saw me with nothing at lunch and when we hung out after school, I would only buy the one Mcchicken/McDouble and I would still be asking friends for the 10cents I needed for tax. These were the first friends I've made before I even knew the true value of money and they're still two of my best friends to this day.
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The key to any successful relationship is communication.
The ability to be open and receptive to what a significant other has to say, as well as the ability to be able to convey something weighing on one's mind, can be healing.
But depending on the circumstance, some things are better left unsaid.
Curious to hear examples of what those might be, Redditor FamiliarFarmer8356 asked:
"What's something you wish you could tell your partner without upsetting them?"
If there is conflict, there is a way to discuss and address the issue in a civil and respectful manner.
Things Just Happen
"Every bad thing that happens doesn't require someone to be blamed for it. And that someone doesn't always have to be me."
A Cornerstone Of A Successful Union
"One of the cornerstones of a good marriage, is knowing how to argue. I’d actually say that before a couple get married, they should check how their potential partner behaves in an argument. What are they like when they get angry. It’s important because no two individuals are going to agree all the time. And on those occasions, it’s important to remember not to belittle the other. Deal with the issue at hand. And especially, don’t argue in front of the kids. You have no idea how much lasting damage this causes."
"All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership."
It's Not That Deep
"please stop complaining about everything."
"If you keep seeking out reasons to be miserable, you will find them."
"I'm tired of being dragged down with you."
There's no need to get defensive when there's something to discuss.
It's Not About You
"That some days I’m just tired from class and work and just want some me time, it’s not that I hate you my social battery is just running out."
"Her first reaction to something adverse doesn't have to be anger."
In The Words Of A Pirate
"In the wise words of captain Jack Sparrow sometimes:"
'the problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude toward the problem.'
It Takes Two To Tango
"That I wish she’d be more independent so she didn’t need my help for everything outside the house."
"That it’s a little disturbing how aggressively he drives when he’s grumpy… heavy on both gas and brakes, zooming in and out of traffic, swearing at people who make mistakes… very unlike him."
Sometimes the truth hurts when talking about members of the family.
A Real Assessment
"That her mother is not a good person."
"I told my husband that it's not that his family is nosy and overbearing, it's that I hate watching him cave and negotiate as if they have a right to behave like this, and I really hate when I'm the bad guy for wanting reasonable limits."
"It got worse, then it got better, FYI."
"His parents are greedy, selfish people and treat him like an atm."
There's definitely a fine line between withholding your thoughts to protect the person you love and being brutally honest.
If coming clean isn't going to resolve an issue, then it might be better to suck it up and deal with whatever frustrations you have about the other person.
It's up to you, but make sure the delivery doesn't come from a place of rage if you do decided to be totally transparent about your negative thoughts.
Every family has a black sheep or every family in its entirety are black sheep.
What is a "black sheep" anyway?
It used to mean a person who brought shame or embarrassment to a family, but it's more often used now to mean the member who is just very different from everyone else—sometimes in a good way.
Redditor Frozen_yoghurt123 asked:
"Who is the 'black sheep' of your family?"
I'm the black sheep or at least I'd like to think so.
"Probably my dad's cousin, who went to prison for murdering his lover's husband."
DW_555Oh My Wow GIFGiphy
"My Dad. He is the only one of 6 siblings who wasn't a huge f**k up. And yet, before my Grandma died she stated that he was her 'biggest disappointment.' He is estranged from his surviving siblings... not by his choice. It honestly blows my mind."
"Toxicity is often a group mindset thing; people don't want you to leave because they are dysfunctionally co-dependent on each other and need each other to justify their own shortcomings in life. A lot of the 'family loyalty' stuff is typically shouted loudest by those who are the least good idea to stay loyal towards."
"My great uncle who stole my great grandfathers identity, stole a couple million dollars, and ran off. No one even knew he was alive until my great grandfathers funeral in 2009. No one has seen him since. My grandma started to cry because she honestly thought he was dead."
"Everyone else just kind of nodded on his direction and went on with the rest of the funeral. I just remember being very confused because I was 9 and I had never met this guy who my dad pulled me aside and told me he was my great uncle. It was a few years later that I got the full story."
"According to my mean aunt, the 'matriarch' in her own mind, it's my twin brother because "he doesn't care about family now that he's a doctor." (He's a resident. Chief resident. He works ridiculous hours and spends the rest of the time recovering from work.)"
"According to my ex-MIL (who still counts because she's Son's grandma), it's me, for divorcing her son."
"According to everyone else, it's Mean Aunt. The rest of us are warm and caring and compassionate. We have our moments; all of us have been accidentally thoughtless or done something selfish once in a while, but we're not deliberately mean and snarky all the time."
"My immediate family are the black sheep of the entire family."
DarthDreganJohn Stamos Cheers GIF by GrandfatheredGiphy
Sounds like everyone has a little black sheep in them.
"By now, my brother for cutting off everyone because he prefers his rude, selfish, paranoid, narcissist wife over all of us."
"My wife is the black sheep of her family in the sense that she's the only one who isn't a rude, selfish, paranoid narcissist."
Lvcivs2311Joe Dirt Brother GIFGiphy
"Me. My granddaddy told me 'I’ve only had the sheriff knock on my door two times in my 80 years, and both times he was looking for you! 'I did some dumb sh*t, caused a little trouble, burned a few bridges but always managed to stay out of jail. Partly because my sister has kept an attorney on retainer for me since I was 16."
"My younger brother (2nd of 4) is a compulsive liar and it got him in a lot of little trouble as a teen, then he told his wife he graduated a big college when we're not even sure if he got his GED because he failed to graduate HS, went to some GED school and eventually just stopped going."
"IF he graduated college, he never mentioned he was going in the 4+ years it takes nor mention graduation or have a diploma. He's not a bad dude, but now family time is super awkward when he and his wife are talking about 'their' college team."
The NOT good girl...
"My aunt's daughter. She’s been in jail for drugs, stolen money from my aunt and other family members to use on drugs and physically abused my aunt. My aunt has tried getting her help, but nothing has worked. She’s just not a good person, and everyone in my family, except my aunt, doesn’t want anything to do with her. I haven’t seen her in 8 years now, and I’m happy about that."
"A former nun - my great aunt - left the religious life and got married. She called herself 'the black sheep of the family' because her habit was black."
Back2BachExcited Julie Andrews GIF by The Rodgers & Hammerstein OrganizationGiphy
Well the black sheep sound like the most interesting family members.
Sex is great, but there are more ways than one to accomplish that euphoric feeling without sex.
There are so many small, ordinary aspects of life that can just send a person and we come across them daily.
A good steak.
A home repair.
The things that make you say...
"I tingle all over."
Redditor OldAboba asked:
"What is the best non-sexual physical feeling you’ve ever felt?"
Adele. Adele live. She sends me.
FloatingRelaxed Exit Strategy GIF by Hannah Bronfman Giphy
"I got a professional full body (everything but my man parts) massage a few years back for the first and so far only time at a spa after the recommendation from a coworker. I felt like I was floating on a cloud for the next few days."
Through your nose...
"Sneezing when you're sick. Then you get that about 20 second feeling of breathing through your nose again and you like ahh that's what I aspire to at the moment."
"Or the very last sneeze of your illness. During a fire drill in high school, I was ambling out after fighting a head old for a few days. The alarm was killing my head which was already throbbing from the sinus pressure."
"I was nearing the field, well away from my classmates, when I cough/sneezed out a huge, green loogie - cleared it about three feet, no icky trail - and by the time I was walking back to the building I was feeling pretty much back to normal. No more head cold after that. Never had something like that ever happen again where there was such an abrupt end to the head cold."
"Right after a migraine goes away. It's almost a spiritual experience."
"This was going to be my answer. I was in the ER one time for a really bad migraine. They gave me what they called a 'migraine cocktail.' When they pushed it through the IV I could feel the cold liquid make its way through my body, up to my head. Once it hit my brain, the migraine was gone. It was pure ecstasy. Even better was that cocktail had Benadryl in it so I fell asleep not long after and slept so good."
"That stretch til you shake when you wake up."
"I once stretched too hard in the morning and got the worst calf cramp ever... it looked like a prune and I thought I would die from the pain. Couldn't stretch in bed for months afterwards out of fear it would happen again."
"When you move over 50, it turns into that stretch til you put your back into a muscle spasm that lasts days."
The ItchScratching Feel Good GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy
"I had a cast and splint on both my legs for 2 months. When they cut it off, they scratched my legs for me and the itch was just top notch! Yeah."
Itching an itch can change a life.
YUM!Emma Stone High Quality GIFGiphy
"When you're starving all day and devour a bomb a** meal."
Sleep for Life
"When you’ve been up for 20 hours+ and finally get into bed and you just know it’ll be the best sleep of your life."
"But man, after 36+ hours, the body sort of aches and it's hard to fall asleep despite being completely exhausted. Then the restless legs kick in... ugh. I do agree that a 20hr-ish stint is amazing to cuddle into, especially if you don't have to get up at any specific time the next day."
"Makes it better when you’ve been sleep deprived for weeks and know you have NO PLANS tomorrow and can sleep as much as you need."
"When you're absolutely busting for a pee and you can finally go!"
"Apparently there’s a thing called a 'pee-gasm' that people (usually women) have that causes an orgasmic feeling when you pee after holding it for a while! I’ve definitely experienced this and I’ve intentionally waited a while so I could have that good feeling... lol."
I Can Hear!!
"The feeling of water leaving your ear after being there all day."
"I had some impacted earwax for a week in one ear, and when it finally got removed it was the best feeling in the world. Initially it was like having a tv or radio in my ear that only had static, but then I could hear. Good god, I could hear. It was amazing."
"Oh man, and it’s WARM from being in your head, and the warmth makes the sensation of leaving even better."
A Good Restdog puppy GIFGiphy
"Sleeping in a warm blanket in winters."
"Or sleeping in a cold blanket in summer."
I am enthralled by all of those things.
People need to stop throwing out unwanted advice.
And when it is requested, think before you speak.
People with mental disorders don't need everyone telling them they have a fix like "exercise" or "herbal supplements."
Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:
"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"
I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.
Duhseth meyers GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"
"Everybody goes through that."
"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."
"They try to minimize it."
"You're worried? Just stop."
"You're sad? Just don't be."
"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."
"Thanks for that stellar advice."
"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."
"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."
"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."
RelaxCalm Down Golden Girls GIF by TV LandGiphy
"You need to calm down."
"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."
Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.
TipsSeason 23 Reaction GIF by Law & OrderGiphy
"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."
"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."
"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."
"'Stop being lazy.'"
“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."
Ways to Cope
"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."
"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."
"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."
'contamination'Disgusted Season 6 GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy
"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."
Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.