It's a dark feeling deep in your gut. Someone has said something incredibly offensive or just said did something that upends all the work you and your team might have been doing for the last 6 months. You're angry. Not just "angry," furious beyond compare with unlimited rage. You want to end this person's existence.

But you don't, obviously. In that moment, though, you certainly feel like it.

Reddit user, u/Atka_XD, wanted to know how close you've come to the brink when they asked:

[serious] What was the closest you've ever been to killing someone?

A Little Preview Of Parenting

When I was fifteen, I carried my two-year-old cousin down a flight of stairs, when I tripped and we fell down three steps. She fell on the back of her head and I on top of her. It took a split second before she started crying and I thought she was dead. Thankfully, she was fine, but I'm so glad she didn't fell harder or over the handrail, or else she would have fallen at least three meters and would probably be dead.


Every parent could probably answer the main prompt about their own kids. Every moment from birth to toddlerhood is just constant vigilance trying to keep a tiny human from accidentally killing itself. When I was in extreme sleep deprivation the first few months I fell asleep with my infant on my stomach, or next to me on the couch, or next to me on an air mattress, etc. All situations that can kill a baby in seconds.

Humans were never meant to raise babies alone and trying to leads to over 2000 babies per year just in the US dying from SIDS, accidents, and unsafe sleep practices.


10 Seconds

One of my coworkers didn't wrap a pallet of 24pk 7up good with plastic wrap so when I came in the next day my jack bumped into the steel frame and a 24pk of 7up fell from almost 3 stories and exploded a foot away from me. I really could've died that day. The coworker got fired immediately. He didn't want to spend the extra 10 seconds.


Boiling Blood

In my city there is a very beautiful Holocaust memorial. It consists of 4 towers with the numbers of all of the victims and it has smoke coming through the floor to represent the gas. I came upon some tourists taking photos in front of it obviously for the gram they where smiling and laughing it up. They where right in-front of the sign saying no photos too Ps I'm on mobile



I was on a date with someone a few years ago, and my dumb 17 year old self had bought this 'bee venom' lip plumper that actually had active bee venom in it.

Madeout with the guy and it turned out he was pretty allergic to bees. Had an allergic reaction, thank god he had his epi pen. I apologized PROFUSELY because I didn't know he was allergic and I guess I really should've considered the possibility, but he acted as if I was some evil seductress assassin that was sent to kill him with my kisses- never got another date.


Parents Are The True Heroes

This is kinda lame compared to the others...

When I was roughly 10 or maybe 9, our family decided to go to the beach.

We were relaxing our feet in the waves and I was holding my hand with my younger brother, around 3 or 4 at the time.

Then I sprinted to our spot, and the propulsion knocked my brother into the water, If my parents were a second late he would've drowned.


ALWAYS Take The Keys Out

I was about 19 at the time and driving from VA to IL in heavy rain. I pulled over to sleep at a rest stop and woke up driving on the wrong side of the highway, in a construction zone. I remember wondering if they had installed the overhead signs backward when I realized the gravity of the situation. Fortunately it was a flat grass median in the mid-west, around 3am, and an empty highway. I slowed tf down and gently got over to the correct side of the road, into the shoulder, turned off the car and shook for a few mins.

I now take my keys out of the ignition and put them under the seat when I pull over to nap.


We Put A Lot Of Pressure On Exhausted Doctors

I was a nutrition tech at my local hospital and I gave someone the wrong tray. I had a post-surgical patient on a bariatric diet and patients on a bariatric cannot eat solids. I gave a bariatric patient a regular tray for their breakfast; pancakes and eggs, bacon and potatoes, oatmeal and red fruit. Bariatric patients can't have anything red. It was early, I was running on no sleep on my fifth straight day, 50 hours, and the patient was sleeping so I didn't double-check the name and the tray. I got onto another ward and saw my mistake and ran as fast as I could. The patient was still asleep, thank God, and never knew.

But had he woken and ate that food, he'd have probably died.


Bend It! BEND IT!

I was on the varsity soccer team at my highschool and we would often play a casual indoor soccer on a covered concrete basketball court with small metal goals. My coaches son, 5-6 at the time was a very little guy but he would play with us sometimes just for fun.

One time I had a completely open shot at the goal, and it's pretty fun to kick the ball with all you got and make the goal move from the impact, so I brought my leg back for a strong kick, and my coach's son, who was actually done playing with us at that time, ran UNDER my leg as I brought it back, and I kicked him so hard, swiping his legs, and he hit his head hard on the concrete. Knocked out, cracked skull and bleeding. I thought I killed him.

Fortunately he came to shortly after and cried as we took him to the ER, but that was a scary 10 seconds when he was out cold.


How High Can I Throw This?

When I was about 10 years old, I found this cool looking rock. It was really big, probably weighed 25 pounds. I picked it up and tossed it up to see how it would look when it hit the pavement. It went behind me and landed on a 6 year old's head and knocked him out. He is fine now, years later, but I still remember thinking I killed someone, and I can still remember hearing him scream in pain as his parents got him. I never got caught because my 10 year old self literally ran to get an adult and told them he did it to himself.



When my ex told me she was cheating with a close friend of ours.

I'd known this kid since highschool so he was more my friend than hers. Eventually we all ended up in the same company together and got closer. We were together 2 and a half years before this happened. I never thought anything of them hanging cause honestly, he wasn't that great looking of a guy and he was intelligent, but at the same time such a bullsh-tter.

Anyways, the day I found out I literally tried hunting him down. I was waiting outside his house, I was furious I just wanted to hurt him. Later that night I found out she was actually driving around with him, keeping him away from home to be safe.

Later in time, I got to punch him in the mouth, but I was much calmer than that first day I found out.


This Isn't London

Driving tired once, had a microsleep and woke up driving down the wrong side of the road. Fortunately it was late at night, no traffic around, but could easily have killed myself and my passenger.

Never driven tired since.


Burn, Baby, Burn

I had started a grease fire in a pot on the stove while cooking for a date. Panic set in as it was kind of big fire, only thing I could think of was baking soda would be the only thing to put it out because that's what they taught us in school right? Ransacked my cupboards, couldn't find it. Next best thing that came to mind? Dirt from outside, ran outside to get some dirt, told her not to pour water on it that I'll be right back. As I'm out there I hear her scream and a flash of orange. My heart sank and I froze for a second, did I just kill my date?

Back inside, she's fine, fire is smaller but still going, my walls and ceiling are scorched, I ask her what happened? She replied, she poured milk on the fire because milk is thicker than water... ok

Anyway, no one was harmed in all this thankfully. Except my bank account when my security deposit didn't cover the damages done when I moved out later. Oh well.

I do have more fire stories from that apartment. Pretty sure my landlord thought I was an arsonist. Or a dumb kid on his first time living alone, pretending to be an adult.


Playground? More Like Deathground.

When I was like 14 or so I was on a swing at a park. I was going about as high and fast as that swing could possibly go. A kid who couldn't be older than 2 wandered directly in front of me as I was coming down. I slammed my feet on the ground and stopped myself about an inch away from her. My hands started to bleed from the chain but at least I didn't drop kick a two year old all the way across the park.

The mother saw the thing happen but she was too far away from us to do anything in the moment but she ran over crying and thanking me for stopping.


Why Would You Say Something Like That With So Many Knives Around?

My boss asked me why I wasnt doing any work after working a 70 hour work week and taking 1 lunch break for the week

I was so mad and work a job where we carry knives on our person I had to throw it across the room and I just picked up my bag and walked out.

This was all before my actual start time after I had been working almost half an hour and still wasnt supposed to start for a other half hour.


Peanut Butter Death Cups

Working at a fast food shop, my friend who was very allergic to peanuts asked for our shops version of the blizzard, I joked "you want that with peanut butter cup right? hahah" we both chuckled, he said no and asked for cookie dough.

For some unspeakable reason, no a single clue why, I made it with cookie dough AND peanut butter cups. Handed it to him without a second thought. He brought it back like a minute later and said he thinks he saw peanut butter cup in it, and sure enough, my dumb teenage ass put this mans literal death poison in his ice cream.

I apologized 100 times, He said it wasn't a big deal. I lived with that anxiety causing thought for a while.

Welp this is the most Karma I've ever gotten. uh, what do I do with my hands at this point?


The Power Of Reading

Nurse here. Unit was very very busy and I mentioned to a patient we needed to start her on antibiotics. Patient consented. I hung penicillin, only to find out our computer said she's anaphylactic allergic to penicillin. Incredibly, she must have outgrown her childhood allergy.

Beat myself up for a long time for that near miss. Won't make that mistake again.


So Close

I was a little kid and my cousins and siblings (all a few years younger) were in the bathtub and I used the hair dryer to dry my hair (well, obviously). Then I wanted to make waves for them so I held the hair dryer very close to the water.

My mother and aunt lost it, will always remember this how they, for obvious reasons, yelled at me for hours. Never got anything electric close to water again.


...What A Terrible Sister-in-Law.

Right after suffering a miscarriage, my SIL told me that I don't know what being a family is like since it was just me and my husband, and that kids make a family

I had to be dragged away by my husband

Was ready to go to prison over that b-tch


Another Inch Or Two To The Left...

This unattended kid ran into the street as I turned into it. Didn't even see him at all because of how tiny he was. Just heard something hit my side view mirror and that's when I saw him rubbing his head


When All You Can Do Is Watch

Had a patient who was essentially a vegetable. I had to wrestle with him and keep him pinned to the bed(most of his muscles had contactions but he was still shaking and stuff due to the pain we were probably inflicting on him) while the nurse pumped fluids out of his lung through a hole in his neck. This guy's entire existnce was just lying in bed being in pain semi choking on the fluids his body was producing inside his lungs only to be pinned down have us remove the worst parts of it and the cycle to begin anew every hour or so. It was heart breaking.

This was not healthcare this was torture. It would have been more humane to let him die. I felt ashamed and still do because I could not bring myself to kill the man.


Photo by Jens Lindner on Unsplash

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